


Traffic Colors

by Freekish



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Aged up characters, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, BDSM, Bondage, Dom Jean, Dom/sub, Friends to Lovers, Little bit of Fluff, M/M, Safe Sane and Consensual, nonlinear timeline, sub eren, vanilla sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-31
Updated: 2016-12-18
Packaged: 2018-03-09 19:34:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 89,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3261812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Freekish/pseuds/Freekish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jean and Eren drabbles in a BDSM au.</p><p>- - -<br/>Jean and Eren start a D/s relationship after being matching up by a mutual friend in the community. However, the line between their friendship and their <i>arrangement</i> begins to blur, rules are broken, and hearts are bound together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. May, Year Zero

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first fanfiction I've ever written and I am not a writer by any means. I couldn't get this au out of my head though, so I had to write it down. I have another 6,000 words typed up but it's all scattered and not put together yet. So for now, a little sneak preview of what could potentially be.
> 
> I apologize in advance for any mistakes.

Eren had never needed to use a safe word during a scene before. That is, until he was a sub for Jean. It wasn’t even from something bad happening. Quite the contrary.  


It was their third scene together. Eren was lying on his back on the bed. He had his hands bound at his wrists and tied to the bed’s headboard. His legs were spread wide and bent at the knee, feet flat on the mattress. He had a vibrator in his ass set on a low speed. Jean was between his legs hovering over his body, biting and licking Eren’s chest, playing with his nipples between his teeth. They’d only been in the scene for no more than 5 minutes and Eren could already feel his release low in his abdomen. On a particularly hard suck on his nipple Jean rolled his hips, his clothed erection rubbing against Eren’s bare hardness. He arched his back and threw his head back, gasping.

“R-yellow! Yellow.” Jean immediately sat up and reached for the vibrator’s remote and turned it off.

“You ok?” Jean looked shocked and nervous. God, he thought he did something wrong. He started to reach for Eren’s wrists when he spoke up.

“You don’t have to untie me. I’m fine, I just—“ an embarrassed blush bloomed across his face. “I was going to come if you kept up what you were doing.” He couldn’t look Jean in the eye. 

Jean snorted, “that’s kind of the point of what I was doing. The point of this _whole thing_ is to get off.”

“Not 5 minutes into the scene,” Eren bit back. He mumbled, “didn’t want it to end like that.” 

“Who says the scene would have ended there?”

The brunette’s head snapped to look at Jean smirking above him. He was starting to lean over him again, hands braced on the side of his chest. The boy beneath him tried to sink further into the mattress, eyes wide watching the predator on top of him. The amber gaze never leaving his face. 

“I’d just keep going till you were hard again.” He plants a light kiss to his collar bones. 

“Raise the speed on the vibrator till you were a writhing mess.” Another light kiss on his chest. 

“And just when your body reaches it’s breaking point—“ He stops to bite down hard on one of his ribs, Eren sucks in a breath through his teeth. 

“I’ll turn the vibrator down and you’ll whine from the loss.” He continues his trek down Eren’s torso, kissing, licking and biting. 

“Then I’ll start the whole process over, again and again, until you beg me to let you come.” 

Eren’s breathing was getting heavier. He was pulling on his restraints, squirming under Jean’s treatment. Fuck, he was close, again. 

“That sound good to you?” Jean’s voice had dropped an octave and he shot up to take a nipple into his mouth again. He lapped at the nub and pulled on it with his teeth. Eren came with a broken curse on his lips. Jean sat back to watch him, white spurts landing on his tan skin. When Eren settled back on the bed, he was panting, trying to catch his breath.  


After a few moments, Eren uttered, “ _Fuck_ …that sounds really fucking good.” 

Jean hums in his throat. “Glad you agree.” 

He reaches for the vibrator’s remote and cranks it to a higher setting. Eren keens loudly, the sound echoing in the room. His back arched lewdly. Jean can already see Eren’s cock getting hard again. “Let’s get started then.”


	2. April, Year Zero

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So after some extreme embarrassment, I decided to continue to post my little drabbles up here. Everything will be from the same au but it won't follow a linear timeline. I'm kind of just writing random scenes as they pop into my head so...yea, nonlinear timeline. 
> 
> I have to be honest, writing is not my strong suit. Out of all my creative abilities it's on the bottom of the list. So, I will gladly take any suggestions and criticisms that you guys give.
> 
> \- - - 
> 
> Chapter 2 takes place about a month and a half before Chapter 1. There's no smut so I apologize in advance for that. It will be in the next chapter though I promise. It's already written out, I just need to polish it up and possibly cut it down a bit since it's, pfft! 6 pages long. 
> 
>  
> 
> Thanks so much for the kudos so far! It makes me happy to know I'm not alone in this perverted world ;)

It’s actually kind of funny how they ended up in this little arrangement. The BDSM community is a fairly decent size in this area and there are a few clubs that attract the specific type of clientele. Most of the time that’s how each of them have found past partners. Nothing ever really stuck though. Jean was left bored with submissives who came off too weak and fragile. Eren just wanted someone who wasn’t afraid to push his limits. Neither of them would have ever known they were each other’s perfect match unless Hanji, the community leader (who was a freakishly good BDSM match maker), didn’t set them up on a blind meet up.

Hanji set up a time for both of them to meet at a local cafe. Jean got there first. He got there 15 minutes early actually. He didn’t think coming in on time and/or be second to arrive was a good first impression of a Dom. So he sat there with his tea and waited. He kept his eyes focused out the window, looking out to the side street, when the door bells chimed. He heard footsteps coming closer and didn’t look up until they stopped beside the table. Eren stood behind the empty chair, a pink blush across his cheeks. Jean sat back in his chair and let out a small laugh and smirked up at Eren.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Green eyes glared back at Jean. The boy opened his mouth and closed it again. He couldn’t find any words, which was very unlike him. “Just sit down Eren.”

Eren pulled out the chair and sat down. Jean couldn’t help the small internal smile because he obeyed his little order. Right as Eren settled in his chair the waitress came over and took his drink order and handed him the lunch menu. He read over the menu while Jean looked over Eren. He could sense Eren’s embarrassment. Though, Jean knew the embarrassment came from their situation and not being found out he was a submissive. He knew Eren well enough that he would never been embarrassed about anything he is. 

“Could you stop staring.” Eren didn’t even look up from the menu. Jean hummed in response and leaned forward with his elbows on the table. He took a sip of his tea and eyed the rest of the people in the cafe but his eyes fell back on his friend in front of him. Eren just rolled his eyes.

The waitress returned with Eren’s drink and took both of their food orders. They started up a small conversation until their food arrived and ate with a few comments here and there. Nothing was said about the reason they were there though. Eren finished eating first. He wiped his mouth and looked back at Jean.

“So do you actually want to talk about this or just forget this ever happened?”

Jean just took his last bite and set his fork down. “Not goin’ lie, I’m a little curious.” 

He met Eren’s eyes and wasn’t surprised to see…well, surprise on his face. The blonde felt a flush creep across his cheeks and his ears. 

“What harm is there to talk about it. If it’s too awkward we can walk away and act like it never happened or we could…” Jean shrugged as he trailed off. 

Eren looked away from the blonde and scanned the cafe. “Alright, fine, but uh, can we talk about this somewhere less public?” 

Jean nodded his head in agreement and flagged down the waitress for the check. 

Since Eren shared an apartment with Armin and Mikasa they agreed to drive back to Jean’s to talk. By the time Jean arrived back at his apartment and was unlocking his front door, Eren was pulling into the spot next to Jean’s car. He held the door open to let Eren through. 

“Want anything?” Jean looked over his shoulder as he walked towards the back of the apartment into the kitchen. 

“Just water, thanks”

“Sure you don’t want anything stronger?” As much as Eren wanted to indulge he knew he should keep a clear head when talking about this stuff. 

“Nah”. Eren plopped down onto Jean’s leather couch sinking back into the cushions. He jolts forward when something cold presses into the back of his neck. “What the-“  


Jean laughs as he rounds the couch and sits next to Eren and holds out a water bottle for him. Eren glares back at him as he grabs the water bottle out of his hand.

“Jeez man, you need to relax.” Jean studies Eren. “Does talking about it make you that uncomfortable?  


“No! Just—I wasn’t expecting this today.” Wasn’t expecting you, he thought. 

He never would have suspected something like this to happen. He never knew Jean was even into BDSM let alone in the community around here. Then to get matched up with him by Hanji. They had been so excited when Eren came to them and asked for a Dom suggestion. Right on the spot they said they had a “perfect match”. Then to find out it was Jean was—

Eren couldn’t pin point how it made him feel. Part of the game was trusting your partner. He’s known Jean since he was 12. Despite how their relationship started off, they’re good friends now. He’s never thought about it till now but he’s one of those people he would trust with his life. The other part of the game was physical attraction. He could admit Jean was attractive. His sharp features and amber eyes. He was taller but leaner than Eren. He wasn’t scrawny though. Under his skin was all muscle. It all came down to, would it be weird because he’s a friend?  


The whole time Eren is silently thinking, Jean is watching him. Trying to read him. He watches each small expression flit across his face. His eyes usually will say everything he’s feeling. There’s uncertainty, worry and lastly, curiosity.

“We can just drop it you know if—“  


“No.” Eren pauses and looks over at Jean. 

The blonde’s facing him, one of his legs tucked under the other. His elbow is resting of the back of the couch and his hand is in a light fist propped against his temple. Completely at ease. 

“No, I’m—I’m kind of curious now.” Eren looks back down at his lap. He can feel the blush over his cheeks and bites at his lower lip.

“You know I’m kind of surprised you’re a sub. Would have thought you got off on roughing people up a bit.” 

Eren turns his head sharply to glare at Jean. He just gives him a shit eating grin in return. He’s trying to make it feel like a normal conversation they would have. Something a Dom usually tries to do in their first meeting. He’s good. Jean lets out a breathy laugh.  


“Alright fine. Want me to go first?”  


Once Jean starts, the conversation actually goes pretty smoothly. Eren nods his head subtly in agreement to some things he says. Asks some questions about techniques and after care. He got kind of excited when he found Jean had some experience in things he’s always wanted to try. Before Eren starts, Jean asks if he could take notes. He explained it would be easier, if they decide to do this, to already have all this written down and not have to rewrite things from memory. He goes to grab a notebook from his bedroom and returns just a minute later.

They talked for almost a good hour about their preferences. In the end, they decided on a trial run. Nothing too intense just to get the feel of each other in that kind of setting. They set some basic rules for the first few scenes and any scenes to follow. First, no anal sex the first few times (fingering and oral is fine). When, and if, it does come into play, they must use condoms. Second, no kissing on the lips, it feels too personal/intimate. Third, no marks that can’t easily be covered up by clothes (they only know too well how their friends react when someone shows up with a hickey on their neck). Fourth, the relationship must be monogamous. If either one wishes to start a relationship with another person their partnership ends. Lastly, they tell absolutely no one about their relationship. 

Eren left after they agreed to meet up the following weekend. 

When Jean was finally alone he reflected over his decision to take Eren on. Hanji was right, on paper, the boy was exactly what he was looking for. Someone who is willing, open minded and could turn the tables on him if they wanted. Jean’s been in enough physical altercations with Eren so he knows first hand how strong he is. He didn’t feel like he would break Eren if he manhandled roughly him or hit him too hard. And if any of Eren’s strong personality traits were part of his submissive act, he would probably antagonize Jean. And there’s nothing Jean loves more than a challenge.

Eren ran over his entire interaction with Jean today on his way home. He was actually a little excited for the weekend. From what is sounds, Jean is completely different from Doms he’s tried in the past. Eren tried to seek out someone who could dish it out mentally as well as physically. He wanted someone to get into his head and crawl under his skin. Usually his Doms read that as, “he wants a mental game, let’s see how long I can deny his orgasm”. That got old really quick. In high school Jean got under his skin in an irritating way. Eren wonders if he can turn that around and use it in the bedroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay? Nay? Meh?...anyway. On to the smut!


	3. Mid-August, Year Zero

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating change!  
> Here it is folks. The smut you were promised. This takes place about 5 or 6 months after Chapter 2.

Only a few people could make it out tonight. The group of friends all try to get together every once in a while to catch up. It’s a rare thing for every single one of them to make it, tonight is no exception. Since it’s the end of summer, autumn just right around the corner, they decided to meet on the beach for a little bonfire. Nothing too big, a few drinks, lots of s’mores and even more laughs. None of them want to do anything too crazy because they either have to drive home tonight or wake up early. Oh the woes of adulthood and responsibility.  


Connie and Sasha are making a mess of themselves trying to make a s’mores tower. Reiner, Bertholdt and Christa were huddled over Reiner’s phone. Probably showing them pictures or videos of the new puppy he just got with Bertl. Marco is talking about his master’s classes he’s taking over the summer with Annie, Jean sitting next to him just listening. And then that leaves Eren. He’s been quiet tonight. Armin and Mikasa couldn’t make it so it was a little odd to see him without his other parts. He would watch, in amusement, Connie and Sasha trying to make their tower. Otherwise he stared down at his empty bottle picking at the label. Jean seemed to be the only one to notice the green eyed boy’s odd silence and goes to move next to him. He figured he better get Eren out of his own head, too much thinking was never good for him.  


Jean sat just close enough to Eren so his knee knocked against the other’s. That slight contact jolted him from his thoughts and snapped his head to look wide eyed at Jean. The blonde raised one of his eyebrows and the side of his mouth quirked into a small smile. At that, Eren relaxed and knocked his knee back against Jean’s. They both looked back out at their friends. No one had a clue what they did together. They probably wouldn’t be able to hear the end of it if their friends knew. So for now, it was still just their dirty little secret.  


Everyone was startled out of their bubbles when Sasha let out a sobbing screech. The tower had fallen. People bursted out laughing, except Connie who was seriously try to console Sasha for her loss. The laughter sparked conversations to be thrown across the fire. Everyone joining in, throwing out a story here and there. 

\- - - 

It was getting late, and people were starting to shuffle around clearing up empty bottles and cans. Marco had already left because he had an early class in the morning and Christa tagged along with him to get back home for Ymir. When all the trash was picked up the group began to make their way back to the parking lot. 

“Jaeger! You need a ride?” Jean knew he originally got a ride here from Connie and Sasha but he could tell the brunette didn’t want to go back with the two love birds. 

“Uh, yeah! Hey Connie! I’m gonna catch a ride with horseface” Eren could hear Jean’s faint _tch_ as he walked towards his car. Eren waved to the other trio and jogged to catch up with his ride home. When he was within an arms distance Jean lightly shoved at his shoulder.  


“I’ll make you pay for that horseface comment” Eren gave him a cheeky smile.  


“That a promise?” Jean snorted and shook his head in response, a smile pulling at his lips. 

The car ride to Eren’s was comfortably quiet. Ambient music filled the space in the car. They pulled into the parking lot and Jean parked outside the front door. Eren turned to Jean as he grabbed the door handle. 

“We still on for tomorrow?”

Jean smirked back at him, “Mhmm. Have any special requests?” 

Eren smiled and looked down at his lap briefly. When he looked back up he had his lower lip between his teeth. 

“Can you add in that riding crop again?” He could clearly imagine the sting of the leather crop’s caress on the back of his thighs and the way it would lightly brush down his spine.

Jean’s smirk widened to show a bit of his teeth. “I’ll see what I can do.” 

And with that Eren got out of the car and made his way towards the front door. Jean waited until he was sure the brunette was in the building before he drove off. He couldn’t help but let a small laugh escape his mouth. It’s a good thing that he already planned on using the riding crop anyway.

\- - - 

Eren arrived on time the next evening. Jean greeted him at the door already in his Dom attire. He kept it simple, a charcoal long sleeve v-neck with the sleeves bunched up to his elbows and loose black cotton pants that fell straight down from his hips. Eren never made a point to dress a certain way for him. His clothes never stayed on long enough anyway. The green eyed boy follows his Dom to the bedroom. He takes the time to get his head set in the right mentality that he’ll need for tonight. Jean shuts the bedroom door once they’re both in and turns to face Eren standing in the middle of the room. 

“Safe words.” It’s said like a statement but Eren knows he means it as a question. He asks every time they have a scene. 

“Colors of a traffic light, red, yellow and green.”

“Good.” He pauses and takes slow steps towards Eren. “’s there anything you don’t want to do tonight.” Eren shakes his head but when he sees Jean start to narrow eyes he quickly amends his answer.

“No.” He still forgets sometimes that he prefers verbal answers to these kinds of questions.

Jean is still taking deliberately slow and calculated steps towards him. His arms are relaxed, hands linked together behind his back. Eren thinks of a predator stalking its prey. So he stands still and keeps his eyes on him. He likes to watch him. Watch his personality shift from the friend he knows to an animal with fire behind its eyes. The feeling in the room changes when Jean gets closer, circles around and stands behind him. The brunette can feel his fiery gaze all over him. Already imagining the scene he has planned. Eren waits, face forward, hands down by his sides, fingers twitching with anticipation. He hears slight rustling of fabric and Jeans mouth is right next to his ear.

“Take off your clothes.” he whispers. 

Shivers run down the left side of Eren’s body when he pulls away. God he loves that. Itching to get started his hands fly to the hem of his shirt, ready to rip it off. 

“Slowly,” Jean adds on. 

Eren takes a deep breath and on the exhale slowly pulls his shirt over his head. Jean is still standing behind him observing. He admires the way the muscles in Eren’s back ripple under his sun-kissed skin. It’s been a while since their last scene so any marks he might have left last time have faded. A fresh canvas.  


Eren throws his shirt off to the side of the room. His pants and socks follow soon after. He hesitates with his thumbs just slightly dipping below the waistband of his boxers. He turns his head slightly to address the man behind him.  


“Everything, sir?”  


“Everything.”  


His boxers shimmy down his legs and are kicked to the side of the room to join the other discarded clothes. Eren straightens up, now fully exposed to his Dom. His cock is already half hard, begging for attention.  


Jean is at his back again, his fingers lightly brushing the small hairs at the base of skull. Eren leans into his touch, craving contact. 

“Now go stand at the foot of the bed and bend over for me.” 

His fingers fall away from Eren’s hair brushing faintly at the top of his spine as his arm falls back down to his side. Amber eyes follow the brunette to the bed and watches as he bends at the waist and braces his elbow and forearms on the bed. He turns to his dresser to grab the first items of the night, puts them in his pockets, and goes to stand behind his partner. 

“You’re being awfully compliant tonight." His fingers are starting to smooth their way up Eren’s back, raising goosebumps in their wake. “It’s been a while, thought you would have been begging by now.” 

He waits for a reply but all he gets is a small whine. One of his hands travels back down to run circles over the other’s hip with his finger while his other hand continues up into Eren’s hair, scratching a little at the scalp as he goes. 

“Or maybe,” the grip in his hair tightens and yanks Eren’s head back, a gasp escapes his lips. The hand on his hip grips him tight and Jean leans over his back, breath hot on his ear. “Maybe you thought this would make up for your little comment last night.” He pauses. “It won’t.” He releases the brunette locks roughly and straightens up digging the lube from his pockets.

Eren hears the telling pop of bottle cap and releases the breath he’d been holding. He’s fully hard now. The head of his cock brushing against the sheets. Warm slick fingers run down the cleft of his ass and circle his entrance.  


“Color?”  


“Green.”  


Jean applies slight pressure with one of his fingers and pushes it past the ring of muscle. It goes in easily. He slides it in and out several times before he teases the second finger against the other’s entrance. When the second finger slides in Eren hisses at the intrusion and grips the sheets. He forces himself to relax and loosen his white knuckle grip on the sheets. Jean pulls his fingers out a little only to push them back in slowly, scissoring his fingers as he goes. He’s avoiding a certain bundle of nerves. Jean’s not an idiot, he knows where Eren’s prostate is. It didn’t take him all that long to find it the first time they did this. Eren tries to rock back onto Jean’s fingers but receives a light smack to the side of his hip. A warning. Eren whimpers but stills his hips. By this point a third finger joins the other two to work open the pink hole. When Jean feels little resistance around his fingers he removes them. With his other hand he retrieves the other item in his pocket. He opens the lube again and applies a generous coat. He rubs the object over his entrance. Eren lets out a tiny moan. He knows what it is. He can feel the cooling metal on his sensitive skin. A stainless steel plug. Jean slides the plug over and around his hole but never breaches the puckered muscle.

“Color?”  


Eren hums before replying, “Green”.

Jean watches as Eren’s body hungrily wraps itself around the plug. The brunette’s small gasps run into a low moan in his throat as he feels the plug slide in. Once it’s in all the way, Jean briefly pushes on it so it will brush against that bundle of nerves. Eren muffles his cry into the sheets. At the rate their going, he can tell it’s going to be a very drawn out scene. He doesn’t mind, the pay off is so much better this way. 

“Stand up” The blonde turns away back to the dresser. 

Eren straightens out his body slowly, adjusting to the metal weight in his ass. He turns to face his Dom who is grabbing something out of the bottom drawers. His eyes fall on the revealed sliver of skin from where his shirt has ridden up. The pale skin contrasts nicely with the dark clothing. When those amber eyes are back on him he sees the bundle of teal rope in his hands. His cock twitches in interest.  


He had never tried rope binding till he started with Jean. He was hesitant at first but Jean was really careful with him. Even did a practice session where he explained what he was doing so Eren would feel more comfortable when they actually did it during a scene. It was different from having just your hands and feet tied up. When you wriggled in basic restraints you only felt the pull around the skin on your wrists, ankles and shins. When you were bound in rope even the slightest movement of your hands would pull on the rope and tighten it around your entire body (or if you just had a harness then all over your torso). Eren loved it.  


“You interested in trying a different sleeve tonight?”  


“Yes sir,” Eren breathed. They’ve only used 3 different bindings before. Jean’s been slowly making them more elaborate and decorative every time.  


“This one will keep your arms behind your back. You ok with that?” He’s standing in front of Eren again, almost chest to chest.  


“Yes sir.”  


“Let me know if you’re uncomfortable or something doesn’t feel right. I’ve got the shears on the dresser if we need them” He looks at Eren with a hint of concern.  


“I trust you.” 

There’s a break in character on Jean’s face. A small tug on the corner of his mouth. A threat of a genuine smile. It was small, could have been mistaken as a twitch but Eren knew better.  


Jean steps behind him. Nothing could be heard in the room except for the Eren’s breathing and the sound of the rope sliding through Jean’s fingers. Once he found the middle of the rope and made the starting loops he grabbed Eren’s biceps and pulled his shoulders back. He guided Eren’s arms through the loops till they wrapped around his shoulders and the knot was centered on his spine. He tightened the slack but not too much to cut off circulation. He ran his fingers under the rope to check the tension. We he was satisfied he continued to the next knot. He created two loops again, guided them up Eren’s arms and tightened the slack bringing Eren’s arms closer together. The process was repeated until he got to his wrists. One some tugs Eren would gasp then hum in approval. A purring sound emanating from his chest. The blonde guided the rope ends through the other’s legs, letting the flat ropes press against the plug in his sub’s ass. He stepped around so he was standing in front of Eren again. He guided the ropes over the crease of Eren’s groin on either side of his flushed cock. Each rope end got strung through the original loop wrapped around Eren’s shoulder. Jean did it one at a time, careful not to let the rope ends hit Eren when he was sliding it through. About halfway between his armpit and his hip he made a loose knot. Then he repeated the process on the other side. When the second loose knot was tied he pulled it down towards his groin tightening the rope running through the other’s legs. Eren cried out. The plug must have brushed against his prostate. Jean repeated the tightening on the other side and got the same reaction out of Eren. Once Jean tested the tension in some spots on the rope he stepped back and took in his view. Eren had his eyes shut tight, teeth digging into his bottom lip. His body already covered in a light sheen of sweat and his chest rising and falling through his heavy breathing. Ever so slowly falling apart for Jean. He stepped forward and cupped one side of Eren’s face, his thumb pulling on his lip releasing it from the harsh bite. His other hand dropped to grip Eren’s length. He gave a languid pull, thumb running along the vein and pressing into the spot under the head. Eren moaned low in his throat.  


“Color?” 

He leaned in and bit at Eren’s collarbones. He keened from the combination of Jean’s hand on his cock and his mouth sucking on his skin.  


“G-green,” Eren confirmed. 

He could feel the other’s pleased smile on his skin. One final pull of skin between his teeth and Jean stepped away from Eren again. He walked to the corner and dragged a ramp kit to the center of the room. He beckoned his sub over with a curl of his finger. He walked carefully, a soft moan in his throat when the ropes tightened just that little bit.  


“Get down on your knees,” he nodded to the floor behind the ramp. 

He braced a hand at Eren’s back as he lowered himself down. Once he was steadied on the floor, Jean reaches for something on the top of the dresser. Eren’s heart starts pumping faster. The blush already on his face gets darker and runs down to his neck and chest. In Jean’s hands is the leather riding crop he’d asked for last night. 

“You know,” Jean says, “I had already planned on using this before you asked me last night.” He has his eyes on the twirling crop in his hands, inspecting the flawless tool. “I know it’s your favorite.” 

His eyes flash down to meet burning blue-green eyes. He holds the handle lightly in his hands at he extends the crop to rest lightly on the happy trail just above the other’s cock. Eren closes his eyes and purrs as it runs up his torso. His eyes open when he feels light flicks on the under side of his chin. Jean looks at him with a wicked smile on his face. 

“How does 15 sound?” Eren tries to shift in the rope bonds but it only causes the rope to push the plug in his ass deeper. He whines at the intimate contact. 

“Hmm, maybe I’ll make it 20.” 

He instructs Eren to lean over onto the ramp with his ass in the air, chest pressed into the cushion. He nudges his knees to be a little more than his hips width apart with his feet. When he’s satisfied he runs the leather tip up the inside of Eren’s thighs and watches the shudder that runs through his partners body. He reacts this way every time he uses the crop and it hasn’t gotten old yet. He continues to lightly graze the sun-kissed skin with the tip of the crop. 

“You’re going to count for me. For every number you miss another strike will be added, you understand.”  


“Yes” A loud crack echoes in the room. “Sir!” Eren corrects. He grits his teeth on the first sting. “Yes sir… _fuck_.”  


“Just so you know, that one doesn’t count.” 

He’s teasing Eren with the crop again. Running over the ropes that line his crack and over the metal plug. It travels even lower to caress the heavy sack between his legs. Eren squirms in his binding, the anticipation and teasing driving him crazy. Jean pulls his arm back and then swipes the crop across the back of an exposed thigh. Unsurprisingly, that lash wasn’t as hard as the first one. Eren knows this is just the warm up.  


“One,” he breathes. Two quick hits follow on each of his thighs, just under the previous strikes. 

“Two, three.” The fourth lands harder on the crease where his ass meets his thigh. 

“ _Shit_ , four”  


The strikes continue to fall with light teasing in between to soothe some of the crop's bite. Eren’s ass and thighs are turning a nice shade of crimson that will most likely be a little purple tomorrow. By the time the hits cease, Eren has counted to twenty-three. His lips are bitten red and wet from the licks of his tongue. His jaw is a little sore from clenching his teeth. The cock between his legs is still painfully hard, pre-come leaking from the tip. Jean runs his cool hands over the heated skin then goes to kneel down beside his sub.  


“You did really good for me Eren.” He runs his fingers through the matted chocolate bangs. Eren responds with a hum and leans into Jean’s touch. 

“Color?”  


“Green.” he rasps.  


Jean leans in, mouth hovering over the other’s ear. He licks around the shell and pulls on the lobe between his teeth. 

He whispers, “How should I finish you off, huh? Do you want my fingers or cock?”  


Eren begs, “Just fuck me, please.”  


“You’re going to have to be more specific Eren.” He gently blows in his ear causing him to squirm.  


“Please, please, fuck me with your thick cock, sir. _Please!_ ” 

God, he loves it when he get’s Eren to this point. The part where there is no shyness to his begging, just pure desperation. He’ll need to get out of these ropes soon but Jean knows he won’t last long. He’s been hard since he was tying Eren up in said ropes. He stands to remove his shirt and pants and kneels behind Eren. He digs his fingers into the pockets of his discarded pants for the condom and lube he put in there earlier. His fingers go to Eren’s sides to undo the loose knots on the front. He pulls the ropes back between his legs while the binds around Eren’s arms stay in tact. The glint of the metal plug is unobstructed now that the ropes are pushed to the sides. The blonde’s fingers wrap around the handle of the plug and begins to pull it out slowly. A whimper escapes from his sub in front of him. He places the plug beside them and lubes up his fingers again. Eren still takes three of his fingers easily. Jean removes his fingers and grabs for the condom. He rolls it on, moaning low in his throat from the contact. He coats his cock in a layer of lube and lines up the head with Eren’s hole. The blonde gives a warning squeeze on his partner’s hips.  


“Ready?”  


Eren nods his head, “Yes sir.” They both groan as Jean inches in.  


“Fuck Eren you’re still tight.” Jean can see Eren’s hands clench into fists, knuckles white. He rubs soothing circles over his hips with his thumbs when he’s fully inside. “Color?” He gives Eren a few seconds to respond.  


“G-gree-nn.” 

When he receives the go ahead, Jean pulls his hips back and rolls them forward slowly. He starts at a slow pace only for a minute. The pace quickens when the head of his cock grazes over Eren’s sweet spot. The brunette keens loudly in response. That sets Jean off, holding Eren’s hips in a bruising grip, the vulgar sound of flesh hitting flesh bounces off the walls. His cock hits that sensitive bundle of nerves more than it misses. Eren screams into the cushion below him. Unable to move, he can only squeeze his eyes tight to fight back the tears. The pleasure is building in his gut, he won’t last that much longer. Suddenly, Jean grabs the top knot in the rope binding to pull Eren up but he keeps a good distance between his chest and Eren’s restrained arms. Eren’s noises are louder now that they aren’t muffled by the ramp cushion.  


“Shi—I—I’m close. Please, p-please, please.” Eren continues to beg. Jean pulls him just a little closer and licks a long stripe up Eren’s neck to his ear.  


“Come for me Eren,” he whispers back. 

He sinks his teeth into the shell of his ear. His sub cries out for him, the sound rough and cracking. He comes untouched, Jean still fucking him through his orgasm. Eren’s clenches around Jean’s cock and it only takes two more thrusts and the sound of the brunette’s wrecked cries to follow him over the edge.  


He stays still only for a moment before he pulls out, both hissing from the small movement. He stands to dispose of the condom and quickly returns behind Eren. He’s slightly slumped forward resting on his haunches. His breathing is still labored. Jean kneels behind him and with shaky hands begins to unravel the knots and loops. He can’t go too fast otherwise he’ll hurt Eren. His arms slowly ease back into a relaxed position down by his sides when Jean removes the final loops from his shoulders. Next comes Eren’s favorite part about being a sub for Jean, his massages.  


His fingers knead into the top of Eren’s back slowly working their way out to his shoulders and then back to center. He works one arm at a time, starting at the shoulder and rubbing deep circles into his muscles, down to his wrists. Thumbs press into the dimples of Eren’s lower back and knead their way up the spine, giving each vertebra its deserved attention. He works his way up to the base of his skull and smooths the muscles forward towards his jaw. When the massage is over, he smooths his hands over his shoulders one last time and down his arms. His hands rest over Eren’s biceps as he hooks his chin over his shoulder and gently tells Eren he needs to stand up, and presses a light kiss to the side of his neck. Jean shifts to pull away but Eren whines in protest. Jean laughs at him.  


Once he’s standing he leans heavily onto Jean as they make their way to the bathroom attached to the bedroom. Eren supports himself on the counter while Jean starts the shower. When he deems the water is the right temperature he helps Eren step inside. He shampoos his hair and scrubs down his body, careful of the tender skin on his ass and thighs. By the time Eren is done he has most of the control back in his body so he can step out to dry off. Jean finishes his shower quickly by himself. He roughly towel dries his hair and wraps the towel loosely around his waist. 

Back in his bedroom, Eren’s already cocooned himself in his sheets, just a tuft of dark hair sticking out in contrast against the white sheets. Jean goes to his closet to grab a pair of comfy pants and then heads to the kitchen to grab some waters. Eren didn’t even move in the few minutes he was gone.  


“You want to crash here for tonight?” Jean places Eren’s water down on the end table as he takes a long drink from his own. Eren’s answer is muffled by the blankets covering his face. “What?”  


Eren pulls the blankets away from his face to reply. “Would it be awful if I already told Mikasa and Armin ahead of time that I was?” 

Jean just snorts as a reply and tosses a water bottle at Eren. He grabs it and finishes most of it in one go. Jean gestures to the sheets. 

“Come on. We got to get lotion on your ass otherwise it’s gonna hurt to sit tomorrow.”  


“It’s going to hurt tomorrow anyway,” Eren growls back but he’s slowly untangles himself from the sheets to roll over onto his stomach. 

Jean grabs some lotion from the end table next to the bed, puts a good amount into the palm of his hand, and rubs his hands together to warm up the lotion. Apparently, it wasn’t warm enough because Eren hisses at the contact.  


“A little warning next time. That shit’s cold.”  


“Sorry.”  


“No you’re not.”  


Jean smiles. “Not even a little.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you were curious what the rope sleeve looked like, it's called the dragonfly sleeve: [here](http://photos.modelmayhem.com/photos/090131/23/498551e34599f.jpg)
> 
> I'm kind of learning all this BDSM stuff as I go. I've always been intrigued by it but never knew technical terms or all the proper ways to do things so I get learn something new every day.
> 
> \- - -  
> March 5th Update: Fixed some typos and formatting.
> 
> I figured most people know what a crop and butt plug look like but maybe not many people know what a ramp kit is so, here's a pic!  
> \- [ramp kit](http://www.liberator.com/media/catalog/product/cache/3/image/460x279/0f396e8a55728e79b48334e699243c07/b/l/blcombo_4.jpg)


	4. July, Year Zero

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a heads up, updates are going to slow down a bit. I had all weekend to just sit here and write but tomorrow it's back to the grind of the real world. I won't leave ya hanging though. I love JeanEren too much to leave them alone.
> 
> Alright so this chapter happens about 3.5 months after Chapter 2. I might need to start adding dates or something. That would probably help. I'll work on that. Anyway, this kind of wrote itself. When I started out I wanted it to be funny but then it turned kinda serious. I'll try and make something light for the next chapter.

“ _JEAAN!_ ”  


“What!”  


“That motherfu—“ Eren stormed out of the bathroom and made his way to Jean’s kitchen. “What the hell is this!?” He points to the side of his neck. Jean’s at the stove flipping pancakes completely indifferent to Eren’s rage.  


“What’s what?” He finally turns to face Eren. The brunette steps closer, finger still pointing to his neck. “That would be a hickey Ere—“ his eyes widen. “Oh shit!”  


“Yeah, oh shit! No visible marks remember! How the hell should I cover this up. It’s 90 fucking degrees outside” He slumps against the counter next to the stove. 

Jean turns to the pancakes on the stove, flips them onto a plate and flicks off the stove top. He exhales loudly and runs his fingers through his hair.  


Eren groans, “Reiner’s party is tonight too. I’m not gonna hear the end of it.”  


Jean shrugs, “All you got to say is you went to a bar last night and got lucky. End of story.” Blue-green eyes bore into the side of Jean’s head.  


“Of all people, you should know I’m a shit liar.”  


Jean snorts. “Technically, it’s not a lie. You got laid last night you just didn’t meet the guy at a bar.” He grabs the pancakes and goes to sit at the kitchen table. Eren sighs and sits in the chair across from him.  


“Knowing Reiner, and Connie, they’re gonna want details.” He drops his elbows on the table and puts his face in his hands.  


Jean smirks at Eren, “Just tell them he had a biting fetish.”  


“That’s not funny.” Eren looks up to glare him through his bangs.  


“Haa but it kind of is.” Eren rolls his eyes and snags a pancake from Jean’s plate. “Hey!”  


“You owe me.” Eren gets up to go grab his shirt from the bedroom. “I’ll see you later.”  


Jean shovels half a pancake into his mouth, “Mhmm.”

\- - - 

Even after Eren left, and his breakfast was long gone, Jean sat in the kitchen reflecting on the night before. It had gotten pretty intense. He didn't put Eren in any restraints so Jean had a few marks of his own to bare. He can still feel the sting from the brunette’s nails raking over his back.  


He lost control last night. Lost control of the scene, Eren and himself. As far as he was concerned, the scene was over after the blindfold came off and the rest was just pure animalistic fucking. He’s not sure if Eren even realized it. His focus this morning couldn’t get past the mark Jean left on his neck. The blonde’s not sure if he wants to bring this up with Eren, but as his Dom, he has to admit his mistake.  
“Fuck. Eren’s gonna kill me.”

\- - -

Reiner’s voice booms from the front door, “Eren!” 

You could hear the impact of Reiner’s hand clap against Eren’s back. Both came strolling into the kitchen, the beefy blonde with his arm wrapped around the brunette’s shoulder. 

“Look who’s here.” 

Everyone in the kitchen waved or said their hellos to Eren. Jean was in the corner nursing a rum and coke, talking with Marco. He gave the boy a small wave that was returned with a nod.  


Reiner turns his head to grin at Eren but, as the green eyed boy predicted this morning, he noticed the bruise on the side of his neck. 

“Oooo what do we have here.” He goes to poke at the spot but Eren ducks out of the blonde’s arm. “Someone got some action last night huh?” 

A majority of the room was focused on Eren’s flushed face now. Connie and Sasha go bounding up to him to investigate the mark. 

“Are those teeth marks?” Connie wiggles his eyebrows at Eren. “Come on man, you know the rules. Spill.”

Green eyes glance over at the blonde in the corner who’s trying to stifle his laugh in his glass. Despite how bad he feels about last night’s events, he had to admit it was still funny to watch Eren squirm in front of their friends.  


“Alright! Fine, you get one question, that’s it!”  


Connie jumped the gun before anyone else could utter a word. “Who bottomed?” 

Eren rolled his eyes. “I did. Happy?” 

Connie snickered. Reiner closed in on Eren again.  


“The guy any good?”  


“Obviously not. I’m still able to walk.” 

The room burst into laughter. Jean choked on his drink. He’s going to make sure he can’t walk for a week for that comment. Eren sent a quick glance back at the corner and Jean made sure his glare said exactly that. The brunette tried to force a smile but it looked more like a grimace. He knew he was in trouble.

\- - -

Eren awoke 2 days later from a notification on his phone. A text from Jean.

**J:** You want to come over to hang out after you get off work today?

He stared at the text. Did Jean actually want to hang out or was it code for “we have to talk about the shit you said the other night at the party”? Whether he was asking as a friend or his Dom he couldn’t leave him hanging.

**E:** Sure. I get out at 7 so I’ll be over a little after that.

Jean responded immediately.

**J:** K.

Damn those one letter responses, Eren thought.

\- - - 

The brunette had been sitting outside in his car for about 10 minutes, nervous about Jean’s intention of inviting him over.  


“Ugh. Just suck it up and go knock on the door damn it.” Eren took a deep breath and got out of his car. He marched up to the front door, knocked three times, then waited. When the blonde opened the door, Eren did not expect to see him in the state he was in.  


Jean was still in his work clothes. A half untucked navy button up shirt with the top 2 buttons undone, a silver tie hung loose around his neck and charcoal slacks. He had bags under his eyes like he hadn’t slept and his hair was completely disheveled like he’d been running his hands through it all day. He looked like a mess. A hot mess, Eren thought, but still a mess.

“You ok?” Eren frowned at Jean.  


“ ‘ve been better.” he replied. 

He sounds exhausted. He holds the door open for the other boy to come in. They walk to the living room and Eren falls onto the couch cushions. Jean stays standing, hand rubbing at he back of his neck. Green eyes follow the blonde as he paces a little across the floor. 

“Look, if this is about what I said at Reiner's,” Eren starts. “You know I was only joking right?” 

Jean stops and stares at Eren with a confused expression, then shakes his head.

“No this isn’t about that.” A small smile pulls at his lips “Although, don’t think you’re getting away with that.” 

The brunette pouts and leans back into the couch. The serious expression settles over Jean’s face again. 

“No this is about the other night when—when I did that.” He points to the faded bruise on boy’s neck. Now Eren’s more confused but he shrugs it off.

“It happens, forget about it.”

“I can’t.” Jean sits in the arm chair adjacent to the couch. Eren waits for him to continue. “I lost control that night. That rarely ever happens. Hell the last time I did that I was a novice Dom. No one ever got hurt but the fact that it happened was scary. But the other night—fuck—the other night, I took my focus off you and put it on myself. I did what _I_ thought felt good without any thought to you and that wasn’t fair. The last thing I would ever want to do is hurt you Eren so, I’m sorry.”

Eren wasn’t sure what to say. It didn’t seem to him that Jean “lost control”. Sure he was a little rougher during the sex but he was into that. Hell he loved that. 

“To be honest, I didn’t even notice. But if it will make you feel better I accept your apology. And thanks for your honesty, I guess.” Jean visibly relaxed into his chair. Eren smiled at him. “Though to be perfectly honest. That was probably one of the best fucks in my life so, maybe you should lose control more often huh?”

The blonde cracked a smile and laughed. “We’ll see.”  


Eren grinned wider. “Alright. So what say you to some ice cream and really bad horror flicks.”

\- - -

Jean fell asleep halfway through the first movie. He at least finished his bowl of ice cream though. The brunette turned off the TV once the movie was over and put the used bowls in the dishwasher. When he went back out into the living room the blonde was still out cold. He’ll probably wake up with a crink in his neck but carrying him to his bed will definitely wake him up. So Eren grabs a blanket from Jean’s room and drapes it over him on the couch. He brushes back the blonde bangs and places a light kiss on his forehead.  


“Night Jean.”


	5. Mid-September, Year Zero

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back a little earlier than I expected. Here's a little something to tide you over until this weekend :)
> 
> Thank you to everyone who has read this and left kudos so far!! You guys are super sweet *blows kisses*

Jean doesn’t know when it happened but he only realized it when he woke up this morning lying next to Eren. It just became an unspoken thing that Eren would stay over the nights they have a scene. Now when he shows up at his front door he has an overnight bag over his shoulder. Jean doesn’t really mind though. He likes having his own personal space heater pressed up against him. Also, he doesn’t like the thought of Eren having to drive home on nights where he might have gone too far into his sub headspace. What is starting to bother him though, is the fact that he misses having a body next to him on all the other nights. Eren stays over once a week, twice if they are feeling particularly frisky, so that leaves 5-6 days where Jean either can’t fall or stay asleep because the other side of the bed feels cold. So on nights when they have a scene, Jean has to hide his almost giddy excitement that after they get off he’ll be able to sleep. Then the next morning he wakes up refreshed and ready to take on the day. He’ll get up and start a pot of coffee and by the time it’s done brewing Eren is usually rolling out of bed.  


There’s something different about this morning though. Jean woke up at his usual time (his internal clock doesn’t let him sleep past 7:30am no matter what time he fell asleep), but for whatever reason, he can’t drag himself out of bed. For the past half hour he’s been looking at Eren. _Eren_ lying in _his_ bed. His body completely relaxed, sprawled out on his stomach. His arms are wrapped around the pillow that half of his face is being smothered by. The blonde can’t get over the stark contrast of Eren’s dark features, dark chocolate hair and tanned skin, compared to the light gray sheets he’s wrapped up in. The way the warm sunlight from the window casts highlights and shadows over the contours of his exposed arms, shoulders and face. All Jean can think is that Eren is fucking _stunning_. And that thought forms a lump in his throat and makes his stomach drop uncomfortably.  


“Fuck. What are you doing to me?” Jean whispers to himself. 

He leans back onto his pillow and stares at the ceiling. He completely spaces out because the message tone on his phone startles him. As he reaches over to the end table he hears Eren begin to stir behind him. Eren stretches his limbs and moans with satisfaction when his joints crack. Jean tries not to let his eyes linger on the undulating muscles of the brunette’s now exposed back for too long. When the brunette finishes stretching he settles into the same exact position he’d been in before.  


“Mmm, why don’t I smell any coffee?” his voice is still deep and groggy with sleep and it’s fucking attractive.  


Jean keeps his eyes on his phone as he reads through emails he received overnight. “Haven’t gotten up to make it yet.”  


Eren groans like an unhappy child. “What time is it?”  


“Almost quarter past 8.”  


“Why are you still in bed then? You’re usually up and out by like 7:30, which is absurd by the way.”  


“Just didn’t feel like getting up today I guess.” He still won’t look at brunette.  


Eren sighs and props himself up on his elbow. “What are you reading?”  


“Emails.”  


Eren shifts his position again, closer to Jean and props his chin on the blonde’s shoulder. “Get anything good.” His eyes are now focused on the device in Jean’s hands, just looking, not reading the text on the screen.  


“Got confirmation that my order came in at the kink shop, so I’ll probably pick that up at some point today.”  


“Can I come?”  


“Uhh—“  


“Please?” 

Jean is suppose to be picking up a surprise for Eren, so it would defeat the purpose of a surprise if he comes with him. But he just can’t say no. 

“S-sure, I guess.” 

Eren hums with happy content and rolls over to sit on the edge of the bed. He bends over to grab his bag of clothes and digs around until he finds his boxer briefs and slides them on as he stands up. Jean can’t help but notice how well they fit. Or the marks the flogger left on the backs of his thighs and parts of his upper back. He watches Eren as he walks to the bathroom. When he’s out of sight Jean slaps his hands over his face and rubs at his eyes. 

“This boy is going to be the end of me I swear.”  


After Jean accepts his fate, he swings his legs over the edge and finally gets out of the bed. He hears Eren call out from the bathroom when he reaches his closet.  


“What time does the shop open?” The faucet turns on for a second.  


“Uh, 11 I think.”  


Eren moves to stand in the doorway working a toothbrush in his mouth. “Wanna get breakfast?” 

It doesn’t come out perfect but Jean understands what he says. He pulls a shirt over his head and looks back at the brunette in the doorway.  


“Sure. There’s a spot a few blocks away from the shop where we can go.” Eren gives him a foamy grin and turns back into the bathroom.  


They finish getting ready pretty silently. Neither one of them can hold conversations that well without at least one cup of coffee in their system. Both of them decide there’s no point in taking two cars, so they take Jean’s (it’s cleaner). The comfortable silence from the apartment follows them into the car. They leave the radio off and just listen to the purr of the engine and the change of gears when Jean shifts them. Eren never learned to drive stick and he can’t help but think it’s an oddly sexy thing to be able to do. Or maybe because it’s Jean that’s doing it, is what makes it sexy. He’s completely at ease in his seat, listening and feeling for the right time to shift into the next gear. The car shifts effortlessly, there’s no jarring, jerky motion. It’s all second nature to him. And as lame as it sounds, he’s like one with the machine.  


Eren can’t help compare the way Jean handles the car to way he handles him during their scenes. That same calm confidence. It seems like second nature to him then too. By this point, Jean knows exactly what buttons to push and how hard to push them. He knows how to drive Eren crazy and then make him completely fall apart in his hands. That attentiveness has started to trickle its way into their everyday relationship too. Just small things here and there. Jean knows how to make his cup of coffee perfectly, which is a small thing but the woman at the coffee shop he goes to practically everyday can’t even do that. He knows when Eren goes a little too far into his mind and gets lost in his day dreams. Like right now.  


“Hey you in there?” Jean waves his hand in front of Eren’s eyes. They’re already parked outside a small diner. Eren shakes his head to focus and Jean laughs. “Come on, let’s get some caffein into your system.”  


Once the caffein is running through their veins they can actually hold a conversation. Granted it’s more like friendly bickering and teasing. And maybe a little bit of flirting on Eren’s part. He like’s it when he can get Jean all flustered. It amazes Eren that this occasional stuttering dork can turn him into a depraved being with just some filthy words whispered in his ears. That’s not to say Jean doesn’t know how to dish it out in a battle of wits and comebacks outside the bedroom. He usually will slide in a comment when you least expect it. And there is usually another person there to witness your embarrassment.  


When their food comes they fall back into comfortable silence. There are random small outbursts when Eren steals some of Jean’s hash browns or Jean takes a piece of Eren’s bacon. The boys leave the diner awake, full and buzzing with caffein. They hop back in the car for the short trip up the street to the kink shop.  


An electronic chime dings when they walk through the door. The woman at the counter looks up, she must recognize Jean because she waves excitedly and walks into the back room, Eren assumes to get whatever it is that the blonde ordered.  


“You can look around, I shouldn’t take long.” Jean says. He walks up and casually leans on the counter to wait for the girl.  


Eren walks further into the shop briefly glancing here and there. He stops to admire some of the fetish clothing. Particularly, a black and teal latex corset. He runs his fingers over the metal embellishments on the front. He looks back at Jean at the front of the store. He’s chatting with the girl now, or really, he’s listening to the girl and laughs at something she says. He tries not to think too hard on the emotion that swells in his chest.  


He moves on to another section of the store. He passes by a wall filled with toys. Some fun looking, others look terrifying. Eventually, he comes across a display of collars. There’s a simple one on the end that catches his eye. It’s a black leather collar with a single two inch black metal ring dangling on the front and matching black metal buckle on the back. Eren picks it up and smooths his fingers along the leather band. He’s always had a thing for leather. A few months ago he ask Jean to wear leather gloves during a scene, and he didn’t disappoint.  


Jean’s still chatting with the girl up front. You wouldn’t be able to tell by looking at her but she’s a Domme. She spent most of the time gushing over her new sub who’s currently tied up at home waiting patiently for their Domme to return. She’s usually good for a laugh every time Jean talks to her. She had noticed Eren when they walked in and asked if he was Jean’s. When he gives her an affirmative nod she lets out a low impressed whistle. Jean just laughs and rubs the back of his neck. He wraps up his order, says his goodbye to the girl and goes to retrieve Eren from wherever he’s hiding. He wanders the store for about a minute before he finds Eren and he stops short when he does.  


Eren is standing there looking at his reflection in a mirror with the black leather collar around his neck. Jean can’t help but let his jaw drop as so many scenarios run through his head that involve that collar and Eren’s body writhing under his hands.  


Eren spots the blonde standing out of the corner of his eye. He can see the blush spreading across his face. Eren sends Jean a wicked grin.  


“You like it?”  


Eren’s words seem to shake Jean out of his thoughts.“Y-yeah. It, um, looks good on you.” He slowly closes the distance between them and reaches up to fiddle with the ring hanging from the collar. “You gonna get it?” 

Eren really can’t resist teasing Jean. “Does Sir want me to?” 

He purrs and leans into Jean’s touch, tilting his chin up exposing his neck and the leather wrapped around it. Those words sends a burning heat through Jean’s body. All the images from a minute ago are flashing in front of his eyes again. He flicks his gaze from the collar on Eren’s neck to his face. Molten amber meeting a raging blue-gleen. The blonde hooks his fingers in the metal ring and tugs on it to bring Eren closer, their noses almost touching. Eren’s eyes widen at the sudden closeness and his heart starts pounding loud in his ears and swears Jean can probably hear it too. The smirk that appears on Jean’s face is filled with filthy promises.  


“Turn around.” 

He releases the ring from his grasp and Eren obediently turns so his back is facing Jean. He feels Jean’s fingertips brush the nape of his neck as he loosens the buckle on the back of the collar. When he pulls the collar off and away from his neck, Eren hears Jean start walking away. 

“Come on Eren.”  


It takes a second before he can move his feet to follow. He catches up to Jean when he reaches the register and sees him toss the collar onto the counter.  


“This too,” he says to the girl behind the counter. He looks back at Eren and raises an eyebrow at him, that same smirk pulling at his lips.  


If the look Jean is giving him is anything to go by, Eren is not going home till tomorrow. That’s if, he can even walk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter should be up this weekend :D


	6. Late October, Year Zero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We’ve jumped ahead a little bit into their relationship. At this point they’ve been “dating” for about two weeks.

“How do you feel about switching things up a bit?” Eren looks away from the TV to the boy beside him.  


“What are you thinking?”  


Jean leans in to breathe in his ear, “I was thinking you could do me.” 

He pulls back but only till their faces are just inches away from touching. Theres a mischievous smile on his face which means there’s more that he’s not sharing.  


“Seriously?” 

Jean hums in agreement. His eyes keep glancing down at Eren’s lips. The fact that he can take them any time he wants now makes him want to kiss Eren all the time. 

Eren can see the want in that amber gaze. He pretends to ignore it just to rile Jean. “You’re not telling me something.”  


“It’s a surprise.” Eren pouts, pushing out his bottom lip. “Gotta keep you on your toes.” 

Eren turns back to the TV but only for a moment. “So does this mean we’re starting the scenes back up?” 

Eren’s biting his lip trying not to smile. It drives Jean crazy when he does that and he does it way too often. It’s cute and sexy all at the same time and Jean cannot grasp how that works.  


“I was thinking maybe this weekend?” The blonde grabs the brunette’s chin lightly in his hand and uses his thumb to ease the bottom lip from the confines of his teeth. Eren’s grin spreads wide across his face.  


“That works for me.” He leans in the rest of the way and gives the blonde a quick peck to the lips then springs off the couch. He doesn’t turn to look back at the blonde and heads to the entry hallway to put on his shoes. Jean is left on the couch completely dumbfounded.  


“That’s it?” He can hear Eren giggle in the hallway.  


He peaks his head around the corner, “For now.”  


“Ugh, such a tease.” He looks back to smirk at Eren. The brunette huffs a laugh. 

When they had the extremely embarrassing conversation about their feelings two weeks ago, they decided to take it slow. As of right now, just Marco, Armin and Mikasa know about their relationship. The boys want to wait till things settle between them before they make it “official” and tell people. Eren goes over to Jean’s a few times a week but he leaves at the end of the night. Too many temptations if he stays. They’ve kept sexual interactions to a minimum. Most cases involved grinding against each other on the couch while shoving each other’s tongues down the other’s throat but they’re ok with that. For now. Both of them were itching to have another scene again, though.  


Jean stands and follows Eren into the hallway. He wants to ask the brunette to stay but there is no guarantee they would keep their hands to themselves and Jean wants to wait till this weekend to ravish Eren. The fact that it’s only Monday night really depresses Jean. The blonde leans on the door jamb watching the other boy meticulously lace up his leather boots. 

“You free Thursday night?” Jean asks.  


“As far as I know.” He looks up at Jean with a knowing look. “Why?”  


“Wondering if you wanted to go out for dinner?” He rubs the back of his neck, blush blooming across his cheeks.  


Eren ties off his boot and stands up to give the blonde a wicked smile. “You asking me out on an actual date Kirschtein?”  


Jean rolls his eyes lightheartedly and sighs, “Yes, Eren. I’m asking you out on a date.”  


“Hmmm,” Eren steps towards him, eyes never leaving Jean’s. He loops his fingers through the belt loops on the front of Jean’s pants and pulls him closer. He playfully nudges his nose against the taller boy’s, “I’ll have to think about it.” 

Eren goes to step back away from Jean, but the blonde’s done with the teasing. He leans in and presses his lips to Eren’s. Despite how bad he wants it, Jean’s gentle. The brunette hums and returns the kiss. He brings his arms up to wrap around Jean’s neck, in return, the other boy’s arms surround his waist. The kiss is slow, there’s no rush or aggression. When they do pull away, Jean can’t help the stupid grin that spreads across his face.  


“I’ve thought about it,” Eren begins. “It’s a definite maybe.” 

Jean shakes his head. Even though they’re kind of dating, they still treat each other the same. Still cheeky. A little snarky. The fake flirting now actual flirting. And as of right now, that works just fine for them.  


“I’ll take that.”

The brunette leans in for one last kiss before he reaches for the door.  


“Soo. I guess I’ll talk to you tomorrow?” Eren asks.  


“Mhmm.” The brunette opens the door and looks back at the blonde.  


“‘Night, Jean.” He gives him a small smile and steps through the doorway. Jean steps up and holds the door to watch Eren leave.  


“Good night, Eren.” 

\- - -

Tuesday and Wednesday surprisingly go by pretty quickly. They’d send texts on their lunch breaks and for a little bit after they got home from work. Jean knew it wasn’t fair to hog Eren’s attention so whenever he knew Eren was home with Armin and Mikasa he didn’t text as much.  


Then it was Thursday. Date night. Jean _was_ going to take Eren to a fancy restaurant. You know, go all out. He realized though that that wasn’t really their scene. He didn’t want to shove romance down Eren’s throat, he just wanted to have a nice night with him and enjoy some good food. He remembered this little hole in the wall that served practically gourmet versions of stereotypical American food. He’d only been there once but the food was to die for and the atmosphere wasn’t too overwhelming.  


Jean picked Eren up. Thankfully the boy was just slipping on his shoes when the blonde arrived. Jean didn’t know how long he could stand there under Mikasa’s hard scrutiny. She had to find out at some point that Jean was Eren’s Dom, otherwise they’re coming together wouldn’t have made any sense to her. Armin ushers them out and sends them a wink before he shuts the door.  


Dinner went really well. Eren raved about the food and essentially melted in his seat when the waitress brought out German chocolate cake for dessert. Jean had slipped the waitress his credit card when Eren wasn’t looking and in the end, he got a kick to the shin under the table when the woman came back with the receipt. Eren made the blonde promise he could pay for the next date. He happily agreed because that means that they get to go out on another one.  


When the night was over, Jean dropped Eren off at the front of his building. Eren didn’t want to make him walk all the way to the door only to get interrogated by Mikasa.  


“Any chance you going to tell me what the surprise is tomorrow?”  


Jean smiles. “Nope.”  


“Augh, you’re killing me.” He groans then goes quiet. Blue-green eyes look over to Jean. “Can I stay over tomorrow night?”  


“Absolutely.” Jean doesn’t even hesitate in his answer. Eren beams at him and leans in to kiss him goodbye. 

\- - -

It’s finally Friday. The start of the weekend and their first scene in a little over two weeks. Jean had Eren arrive after dinner. He explained that there was no way he was going to be able to sit across a table from him without ripping his clothes off, so, after dinner is was.  


Eren was greeted by an envelope taped to the door. This was new. There was a note inside with instructions. He was to let himself in, go to the bedroom where he’s suppose to fully strip down, lie on his back on the bed and wait. And like the good sub that he is, he does as he’s told. 

The brunette waits in the room for what feels like forever but is probably only five minutes. Green eyes look over to the dresser to find no toys or rope lined up. The top is completely bare except for a lamp. His Dom hasn’t given him any clues to what the surprise is going to be and it’s killing him. 

Eren hears the door click open and Jean walks in. He’s wearing just his black pants tonight. He walks over and leans his hip up against the bed, arms folded across his chest.  


“Comfy?”  


The brunette beams up at him, “Very, sir.”  


Jean nods his head. “Safe words.” Every time.  


“Red, yellow and green.”  


Jean reaches for the drawer on the end table and digs out the condoms and lube and places them on the edge of the bed. He crawls onto the sheets and straddles the brunette’s waist. Eren places his hands on top of the blonde’s thighs, feeling the soft cotton under his fingers. Jean glides the palms of his hands over Eren’s abs and up onto his chest. His eyes following his own movements. He curves the tips of his fingers so his nails lightly graze the skin when he pulls his hands back down. Eren shivers below him, light touches always seem to do that. Jean looks up at Eren and finally speaks.

“I’m not going to use any restraints on you tonight.” 

He takes Eren’s wrists in his hands and puts them above his head. “I want to see if you can restrain yourself.” 

His face is just inches from the boy’s beneath him. 

“You aren’t allowed to touch me.” He pulls away trailing his fingers down his sub’s arms to his ribs.  


Eren’s eyes go wide. He’s played this game before in the past and if he recalls correctly, he wasn’t very good at it.  


“You can hold onto the headboard if you’re being tempted.” His Dom looks down on him with a smug expression. Eren doesn’t want to give in that easily this early so he simply holds on to the pillow under his head.  


“So how badly do you want your surprise?” Jean is starting to slowly untie the drawstring of his pants.  


Eren whines, “Very badly, Sir.”  


The blonde gives him a devious smile and starts to pull his pants down over his hips. Eren watches his hands move and stops breathing when he starts to see the scalloped edges of dark red lace lingerie appear as Jean’s pants slip lower.

“ _Jesus, fuck._ ” Eren grabs on to the headboard for dear life. So much for not giving in easily. Eren can feel the heat rushing south in his body, his cock swelling for the sight in front of him.  


The brunette has mentioned, on more than several occasions, how good Jean would look in lingerie, specifically that of the lace variety. The blonde knows this is going to torture his sub because he can’t touch no matter how much he desperately wants to. And Jean wants to see Eren writhing like he’s in heat.  


He slips away from Eren and pulls his pants all the way off. He’s well aware of the eyes that follow his every movement. When the pants no longer obstruct his view, the brunette can fully see the dark red lace hipster panties. They ride low on the blonde’s hips, extenuating the deep V that disappears behind the lace. He can see the hard cock pushing against the fabric and Eren’s mouth runs dry. He wriggles in the sheets. The need to touch makes him whimper. He wants to mouth at the cock through the lace and feel Jean’s hands tug at his hair. God, if he grips the headboard any tighter, he’s sure he’s going to break it.  


Jean crawls back over Eren and nips at his heaving chest. He dips his hips teasingly to brush the lace fabric over Eren’s now erect cock. The brunette pushes his head back on the pillow and moans in his throat and bites down hard on his lip. Jean watches him as he travels lower, his breath ghosting over the head of his sub’s cock.  


“Color?”  


“Green” Eren pants. Jean gives him a shark like grin.  


Jean is ridiculously good with his mouth, it’s insane. He gave Eren a blow job during their first scene and the brunette will openly admit that made him, hands down, fully submit to Jean. He had got rid of his gag reflex long ago and can open his throat to take Eren all the way to the hilt. The tongue, that usually seduces Eren with words, ruins him when it presses into the vein on the underside of his cock and drags up to the tip to play with his slit. He gives sloppy kisses down his shaft and licks his way back up to the head. Jean smirks around the head of his cock, watching Eren fall apart. Yeah, he knows he’s good, too. He takes Eren into his mouth till his cock hits the back of his throat. He swallows and moans around it sending vibrations up the shaft. Eren’s hands fly off the headboard to grip the sheets beside him. His moans fill the room, keening every time Jean swallows him. When he lets off, his teeth graze the sensitive skin making Eren curse every deity he knows.  


He lets the brunette calm down for a minute, rubbing circles into his hips with his thumbs. The vice like grip he has on the sheets loosens but they don’t move from their place. He’s trying so hard to be good for Jean but his resolve is weakening every minute. Jean leans over him, kisses his chest and goes higher to nip at his chin.  


“You want more?” His lips trail down his jaw leaving feather light kisses in their wake. He’s tormenting Eren with gentle gestures, breaking him down till he’ll be nothing but putty in his hands. Eren’s struggling with words.  


“Mhmm.” Jean bites at his ear. “ _Fuc_ —yes, Sir. I want more.”  


Jean leans to the side to grab a condom and lube. He sits on Eren’s thighs as he grips the brunette's cock giving a few slow tugs. The condom gets ripped open by Jean’s teeth and he slowly unfurls it over Eren. The brunette’s fists slowly tighten around the sheets again. Jean shuffles forward on his knees so his ass is over Eren’s cock. He braces a hand on the hard abs beneath him and reaches behind him under the lace. Eren’s going to lose it if he has to watch Jean open himself up with his own fingers. The blonde just smiles down at him like he knows what Eren’s thinking, which he probably does. Eren shuts his eyes tight and leans into the pillow. He hears Jean’s soft moan and a quick, quiet, squelching sound. His eyes shoot open to see the blonde smugly holding a plug between his fingers. He had a plug in his ass the whole fucking time.  


“You gotta be fucking kidding me,” he mumbles. 

Jean has the audacity to snicker at him. He gets up for a moment to remove the lace from his hips and put the plug off to the side and then is back on Eren. He reaches for the lube and puts a good amount in his hand and slicks up Eren’s painfully hard cock. He adds a bit more lube to his fingers and makes sure his hole is ready. A hand grips Eren’s cock and lines it up to Jean’s entrance.  


“Color?” he purrs.  


“Green all the way.”  


Jean takes a steadying breath and begins to sink down on Eren’s length. He hisses when the head is in and continues to sink further.  


“Fuck you’re thick.” 

Eren is trying not to buck his hips up into Jean. He’s never bottomed with Eren before though so he’s going slow. When the blonde is fully seated on Eren’s lap he gives himself a minute to adjust. Eren wants to run his hands up Jean’s sides, rub circles with his thumbs over his hips, kiss him deeply till he’s ready to move, but he can’t. He’s tied by an invisible strings of words that told him not to touch and he’ll obey those words. The blonde’s hips start a slow rocking movement.  


“You good?” Jean asks. He’s already sounds out of breath.  


Eren rasps back a quiet, “Yeah.” 

Jean completely ignores the fact that he didn’t say Sir because he’s too focused on the fact that Eren’s cock’s in his ass and it feels so _fucking_ good.  


Jean begins to gradually lift himself up on Eren’s length and smoothly slides back down. He circles his hips and lifts himself up again slowly. He doesn't keep up the slow pace for long. His thrusts start coming down harder, faster. By the time he’s full on bouncing on Eren’s lap to a brutal rhythm, the brunette can’t take it anymore. Eren shoots up to a sitting position, almost knocking Jean backward but his knees behind him break the fall. Jean halts his movements to gentle grinding. Technically, Eren hasn’t touched Jean yet. Their faces are close, nose to nose. Jean has a devilish grin on his face, watching his sub.  


“What are you doing, Eren?” It comes out almost singsongy. No scolding or harshness to his voice.  


“I’m breaking the rules.” 

Their lips crash together. Eren lets go of the sheets and grabs Jean’s hips pulling him down to grind harder against him. The blonde wraps his arms around the boy’s shoulders and digs his fingers into his hair. The kiss is getting heated and rough. Jean slides his tongue along Eren’s and moans into his mouth. He sucks on his lips and bites at them as he pulls away. His breath hitches when he feels Eren’s cock get closer to his sweet spot. Jean’s Dom returns and shoves Eren down on his back. He rips the brunette’s hands away from his hips and pins them above his head. Eren growls and bucks his hips up into Jean.  


“ _FUCK!_ —do that again.” 

Eren does as he’s told, digs his heels into the mattress and thrusts his hips upward. Jean cries out loudly. Eren could listen to him all day. When Jean is the one fucking Eren he makes minimal noises, but when he’s the one bottoming he can probably out cry Eren.  


Jean tucks his face into the crook of Eren’s neck and slides his hands into Eren’s to intertwine their fingers. He trails kisses wherever his lips can reach. He latches on to the base of the brunette’s jaw. Eren feels the sting of Jean’s teeth biting at his skin and his tongue soothing it over. The blonde continues to suck at his skin, marking him for everyone to see.  


“Mine.” Jean breathes in his ear.  


What feels like an electric shock runs down Eren’s spine at that word. He thrusts up harder, hitting Jean’s prostate. The blonde’s body is shaking, his cries catching in his throat. He can feel Eren’s rhythm stuttering. He’s close.  


“Come on.” Jean squeezes around Eren’s cock, “Come for me.”  


Eren’s hips frantically pound into Jean and the blonde can’t hold on anymore. Jean sees white when he comes across Eren’s chest. The brunette is quick to follow when Jean tightens around him.  


They lie there, unable to move for a few minutes. Eren shifts his hips to easily pull out of Jean. The blonde flops over onto his side next to Eren and wraps his arm around his waist. Eren kisses his forehead through the fringe of his bangs and gently removes Jean’s arm.  


“I’ll be right back, ok?” The roles have switched, the sub takes care of the Dom after the scene. 

He goes to the bathroom to throw away the condom and cleans himself up. He returns to Jean with a damp cloth and goes to get them some water. Jean takes the cloth and wipes himself down. When he’s done he throws it on the floor and lies on his side facing the middle of the bed. Eren comes back with waters that he puts on the end table and snuggles up close with Jean in bed, his face pressed into the crook of the blonde’s neck. Their bodies are exhausted but they aren’t ready to sleep yet. Eren breaks the silence.  


“Please don’t do that again when I’ve been deprived of sex for almost a month.”  


Jean laughs, “It was like 16 days.”  


“Close enough.” Eren is silent for a couple seconds and pulls Jean tighter against him. “I really _really_ like you.”  


“Hey.” Eren looks up at him and receives a light kiss on his lips. “I really like you too.”  


They both aren’t ready for the other L-word yet. They’ll get there someday though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm starting to have way too much fun writing this thing. My list of ideas keeps getting longer and my fingers are having a hard time keeping up and writing it all down. I'm actually really surprised I've gotten as far as I have. I've never written something and shared it this publicly before. Knowing that people are actually liking it and want to continue to read it blows my mind. So thank you guys!


	7. Early October, Year Zero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flashback! What are feelings?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright guys, this chapter got kind of fluffy and maybe just a tad bit angsty. But come one what JeanEren fic isn't. Smut's coming next time ;)

Eren barely finishes knocking on the door when it opens and Jean grabs him by the front of his sweatshirt to pull him inside. The blonde closes the door by pushing Eren’s back up against it, his fist wrapped around the fabric on Eren’s chest. So they’re doing it rough today, Eren’s very OK with that. The brunette is grinning practically ear to ear. Jean hasn’t been rough with him in a while. After the hickey incident they decided to let their savage beasts out to play now and then, mark each other up with scratches that sting for days and bruises that take almost two weeks to fade. Eren whines with need just thinking about it.  


Jean’s toys with the hem of Eren’s sweatshirt with his other hand, he leans into the crook of the other boy’s neck, mouth just hovering over his pulse.  


“Safe words.”  


Eren’s head is already spinning and he has to concentrate really hard to answer without stuttering. 

“Red, yell-low, green. Green, green, please.” 

He’s already begging, hips thrusting forward searching for some friction and they’ve barely even started. Jean pulls back and whips the sweatshirt over his head, chocolate locks now going in every direction. Eren’s eyes are burning with lust, want and a hint of desperation. The blonde hooks his fingers into the front of Eren’s pants and pulls him deeper into the apartment. Jean loses his shirt somewhere near the kitchen door and Eren threw his into the living room as they passed. 

They don’t even make it to the bedroom. Eren is pressed against the wall in the hallway, his legs securely wrapped around Jean’s waist. Jean has one hand on his ass and the other holding Eren’s wrists over his head. He’s marking Eren’s collarbones, sucking, biting and licking the dark skin. He wants to go higher, mark Eren where people will see and know he belongs to him. Eren squirms in his confined space and Jean can feel his hold on Eren’s body slipping. He let’s go of the brunette’s wrists and hoists him higher on his hips. Eren immediately drops his arms and wraps them around the top of Jean’s shoulders. His fingers slide through the short hairs of his under cut and into the longer blonde locks on top. Jean rolls his hips, their cocks rub against each other through their jeans. Eren gasps in Jean’s ear, heat is starting to slowly coil in his gut. He needs more. His grip in the blonde hair tightens, Jean hisses and pulls his lips away from the tantalizing skin. His pupils are blown wide, just a sliver of amber coating the deep blackness. Their foreheads press together, small grunts and moans fill the space between them. Eren shifts his head just slightly and nudges his nose against Jean’s…from there it’s a blur. Lips meet with bruising force. Quickly followed by eager tongues. Both getting intoxicated by the taste of the other. Their heads fog up with thoughts of nothing but lust and a need to be closer. Jean presses Eren harder against the wall behind him with a thrust of his hips. Eren gasps into his mouth and Jean takes the opportunity to bite on his lower lip. 

That brings Eren crashing back down into reality. His eyes shoot open in panic. Eren’s active fight or flight response kicks in and he quickly chooses the second option. He wriggles himself free from Jean and once his feet are back on the floor he books it. 

\- - - 

Eren bursts through the front door and storms down the hall into his bedroom. His aggressive entrance startles Armin who had been sitting on the couch reading when he came in. Concerned, Armin puts his book aside and follows Eren to his room. The door was left open a crack so he knocks lightly as he pushes his head through the door. Eren is sitting on the edge of his bed, elbows on his knees and face in his hands. The blonde grabs Eren’s computer chair and sits in front of him. He gently wraps his hands around tan wrists and rubs soothing circles into the bones.  


“Eren, you ok?” 

The brunette heaves in a breath and lets it out in a rush as he pulls his hands away from his face. His face is bright red, minimal streaks from where tears fell.  


“Yeah, I’m fine.” He sniffs and stands up abruptly. “I’m going to go take a shower.” He tugs his sweatshirt off and heads for the door.  


“Eren—“ Armin pauses, “Isn't that Jean’s shirt?” 

Eren completely stills and looks down at his chest. It’s not the shirt he had on when he left this afternoon. He’s wearing an alumni engineering shirt from Jean’s school. Fuck. He probably mistook it for his when he was rushing out.  


“Uhm. Yeah. He let me borrow it after I got pizza sauce on mine.” He shrugs.  


“I thought you went for a session with your…Dom.” Armin’s eyes widen and he gasps when he sees Eren blush even brighter. “ _Jean’s_ your Dom!?”  


“Shhh.” Eren hisses and reaches for the door and pushes it closed.  


“She’s not here.” 

She meaning Mikasa. If she ever found out what he was doing she would flip. Eren puts his back against the door and slides down to the floor, knees tucked up close to his chest. 

“Is it really him?”  


“Yes.” The answer is small but Armin hears it. He crawls down to join Eren on the floor.  


“So what happened that you came back here like this? Did he hurt you?” Eren is silent for a moment.  


“No he didn’t hurt me. I—I broke a rule.” Armin tilted his head in confusion. “I kissed him.” 

The blonde nods his head in understanding now. He’s familiar with some of the rules Eren sets up with his Doms.  


“How’d he react?”  


Eren sighs. “I didn’t stick around long enough. I panicked and ran out of there. Hence the wrong shirt I’m currently wearing.” 

Eren furrows his brows and stares at the floor. Armin watches as the brunette fidgets with a string on his jeans.  


“You like him don’t you? More than just friends or as your Dom.” Armin speaks softly in hopes it will help calm Eren down. Eren makes a frustrated noise.  


“Fuck I don’t know.” Deep breath. “Maybe.” He sighs almost as in defeat.  


“You need to tell hi—“  


“I know. I know.” Eren wraps his arms around his knees and rests his head on his forearms. “I just need some time to think this all through.” He imagines Jean does too.

\- - - 

Jean stood frozen in place until he heard the front door slam closed. He fucked up. There is no easier way of putting it.  


“ _Shit!_ Shit shit shit.” 

He runs to the front door, looking out the window beside it. Eren’s car is already gone. He could call him but he has no idea what he would even say right now. He’s freaking out. Eren’s probably freaking out. 

“ _Fuck!_ ”  


The blonde walks to the kitchen to grab his phone. He quickly scrolls through his contacts. He hovers over Eren’s name but thinks better of it and keeps scrolling. He hits the call icon and brings the phone to his ear. It rings four times.  


“Hey Jean!” Marco greets him and Jean can practically hear the smile on his face. Despite the comfort Marco’s voice brings he can’t find his own. “Jean? You there?”  


All blonde can do is let out a shaky sigh.  


“Hey. What’s wrong?”  


He takes a deep breath. “I messed up.”  


Marco is quiet on the other end of the line,“Want me to come over?”  


“Yea.”  


“Be there in a bit ok? Hang tight” 

Marco has been his best friend since they were in diapers. He was the brother Jean never had. They tell each other everything and know what to do when one of them is hurting. So it’s no surprise when Marco lets himself into Jean’s apartment and drops a pint of Ben and Jerry’s on Jean’s lap and goes to retrieve a spoon from the kitchen. It’s because of Marco’s influence that Jean believes ice cream makes everything better. 

Jean’s curled up in his arm chair, scraping away at the top layer of ice cream. The freckled boy sits patiently on the other couch waiting for Jean to collect his thoughts. 

“You know the sub I’ve been seeing for the past couple of months?” The blonde briefly looks up at Marco to see him nod. “It’s Eren.”

Marco smiles at him, “I know.”

“How’d you—“  


“I called once to see if you were free, maybe like, two months ago, and you said you were meeting up with your sub. So I called Armin to see if he, Mikasa and Eren wanted to go out. He told me Eren was going to hang out with you. Put two and two together.”

“Oh.” He sits for a few minutes to think about how he wants to approach this next topic. Knowing Marco, he’s probably already figured it out and is just waiting on Jean to confirm.

“I think I broke my number one rule.” Besides the rules Jean makes with his subs, he creates a few of his own to protect himself. His number one rule being: Don’t fall for your sub.

“How do you feel about that?” God, he sounds like a psychologist.

Jean stares into the pint of melted ice cream and shrugs. “I don’t really know how to feel about it yet. I just figured it out like an hour ago.” He pauses. “Actually, I don’t really know when. I guess it’s really been a while. The feeling would creep up on me every once in a while and for the longest time I would just shove it away. Then today happened and—“ 

“What happened today?”

Jean sighs. “Things were getting pretty heated. I lost myself for a second—one minute we’re making out, the next Eren freaks out and runs out the door. He looked petrified Marco.” 

“Did you kiss him or did he kiss you?”

“I don’t know. Everything was kind of just a hot mess.” Jean looks down at his hands and starts picking at his nails. “I know I have to talk to him at some point. I just don’t know how much I should—uh, want to say.” 

“Well first, give yourself time to think about it. Sort out how you feel before you talk to him. If Eren was scared he might think he did something wrong. You guys have rules about kissing right? Maybe he thought he stepped over the line.” 

“It’s more than that. He couldn’t get away from me fast enough.” Marco frowns at that. He knows Eren pretty well. He knows that Eren mostly acts first and thinks later. 

“Just give him time then. Let him come to you. If he waits too long though, you know you have to go to him, right?”

“Yeah I know.”

\- - - 

Four days go by and Jean hasn’t heard a word from Eren. Granted he hasn’t tried contacting him either. By now the blonde has pretty much most of his feelings sorted out. He likes Eren. A lot. It’s more than just friendship but he wouldn’t say he fell in love with him. If he had to pick a term for how he feels it’d be crush. He has a crush on Eren. 

“I’m a 25 year old who has a sappy crush on my friend. Great.”

Jean also spent a a good portion of his time the past few days running. It clears his head when he gets stressed. And over the past four days he’s been very stressed. He’d wake up, go for run. Come home from work, go for a run. He’d run till his lungs were sore and his legs were screaming. He might have pushed himself a little too hard this week and it’s only Wednesday.  


He’d just rounded the corner into his complex when he sees him. A lone figure sitting on the steps leading to his front door. Jean slows down and walks the rest of the way. Eren doesn’t notice him till he’s only two doors down. The brunette stands up when he spots him. When Jean is close enough to see his face he’s glad to see that at least Eren doesn’t look angry. If anything he looks nervous, maybe a little uncomfortable. Well, that makes two of us, Jean thinks.  


Jean reaches into his pocket to pull out his keys and fiddles with the keyring when he’s in front of Eren.  


“Hey.” Jean speaks first.  


“Hi.” Eren’s response is quiet which isn’t like him. Eren’s loud. His normal voice is practically shouting.  


“Soo um,” Jean looks around the parking lot before he looks back at the brunette, “we gonna stop ignoring each other now or what?” 

The blonde’s go to self defense mechanism is sarcasm. It rubs many people the wrong way, one of those people use to be Eren but he understands now why Jean does it.  


“I guess so.” The corners of Eren’s mouth twitch into a smile and that puts Jean a little at ease.  


“Wanna go inside?” Eren just nods his head and follows the blonde into his apartment. “Do you mind if I grab a shower real quick so I’m not…” he gestures to his sweaty clothes, “gross.”  


“Sure.”  


“Ok. Uh, you know your way around the kitchen so help yourself to whatever’s there.” 

With that the blonde disappears down the hallway to his room. Eren looks back to the kitchen but decides he doesn’t want anything. He sits down on the couch and pulls out his phone once he hears the shower turn on. He texts Armin letting him know that Jean showed up. Armin had told him that Jean has been going on runs a lot more (info he got from Marco) and that if his car is in the parking lot but doesn’t answer his door to just wait for him to come back. And that’s what had happened. Eren had probably waited outside for 20 minutes before Jean made it back. That had given him more time to run over in his head what he wants to say but also more time to overthink the entire thing. His phone buzzes with Armin’s response. It simply says “Good luck!” Yeah. He’s going to need it.

How the hell do you tell a guy, that ties you up and whips your ass with a crop, that you like him? And what do you do when that same guy has been your close friend for the last 7 years? How do you explain that you enjoy just being around him, sharing small insignificant moments? That you like lying in his bed, not because the bed feels amazingly comfortable, but you feel comfortable lying next to him. How do you explain these things when they are so new to you? Seriously, how? Because Eren has no idea. 

The brunette doesn’t notice the slight dip in the cushion on the other end of the couch.

A foot nudges Eren’s thigh. “You’re thinking too loud.”  


Eren startles. “Yea. I’ve been doing that a lot lately.” 

He glances over at Jean. His hair is still wet from the shower, he must have only towel dried it cause it’s also sticking up everywhere. His back is against the armrest, legs bent and tucked into his chest. His arms are loosely crossed over his chest. It’s not so much a defensive position but a protective one. He feels vulnerable. 

“Sorry I ignored you the past few days. I—I didn’t know what to say.” Eren’s the one the break the silence this time.

“You don’t have to apologize about that. I could’ve called but I didn’t know what to say either.” Jean watches Eren fidget with his hands for a few seconds. “Do you want to talk about it?”

That questions brings on a sense of deja vu for Eren. Thinking back to six months ago, sitting on this very couch deciding to be Jean’s sub. Who would have thought it would get this far?

Eren swallows, “Yea.” The blonde nods his head. He can sense Eren wants to say something so he lets him go first. “I do owe you an apology for how I reacted. Running out was probably the poorest decision I could have made.”

“So then why did you run?”

“I panicked because I broke a rule an—“ 

Jean snorts and looks at Eren with a wry smile. “Do you know how many of my own rules I’ve broken with you?” 

Eren’s eyes widen and shakes his head. Jean huffs a laugh and continues.  


“So besides the rules that we had set up, I give myself some rules to follow. Some of those include not letting my subs stay the night. If I felt they shouldn’t drive home I got them cab. I let you stay. I don’t like interacting with subs outside of scenes unless we are planning one. That one was kind of hard for us since we were friends to begin with and hang around the same people. Then a very important one, stay in control. Which, now, there are two occasions with you that I didn’t do that. So, yea, add on the hickey, the kiss and the fact that I told Marco about us that equals out to a lot of broken rules.”  


Eren stares at Jean. He never knew Jean even had other rules. He doesn’t know what to say besides,“Why?”  


“Why’d I break them?” Eren nods and Jean gives him a sad smile and looks down at his hands in his lap. “Cause I broke my number one rule.” He takes a deep breath. “I f-fell for my sub.”  


Eren’s heart stops. He’s pretty sure he stopped breathing too.  


“Y-you—“  


“I like you Eren. A lot actually. I want to do all the dumb sappy shit, like take you out to dinner and a movie or— _fuck_ —I don’t know—hold your damn hand.” Jean rubs at his face and then focuses on the floor in front of him.  


“Are you s-serious?” The wobbliness of Eren’s voice makes the blonde look over at him. He’s hiding a smile behind the back of his hand and his eyes are shiny with unshed tears.  


The blonde nods his head. “Yea.” 

Eren lets out the breath he’d been holding in a rush.  


“I, um,” The brunette fidgets in his seat a bit. He let’s out a small laugh and looks back at Jean. “I like you too.”  
Both of their faces flush from embarrassment.  


“God, I’ve been trying to think of a way to tell you that for the last four days and I probably did it in the lamest way possible.” Eren laughs at himself.  


“Yea well, at least you didn’t disclose how much of a sap you are.” Jean manages to blush even more up to his ears.  


“Your extracurricular activities at least are proof you’re not a sap all the time though.” Jean manages to laugh at that.  


“Thank god for that.” 

The two of them can only laugh after that. The awkward tension from the beginning of the conversation lifted and now it’s almost back to how it normally is. Comfortable.

“If I kiss you right now, are you going to run away?” Jean scoots onto the middle cushion, closer to Eren.  


The brunette leans towards him and smiles. “Only if you’re a terrible kisser.” They both know Jean’s nowhere near a terrible kisser.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feelings are hard. I feel like some moments were a little cheesy but I'm a sucker for that.


	8. Early December, Year Zero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now a little over a month and half into their relationship, Jean has a special plan for Eren.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those that enjoyed Chapter 1, I think you're gonna like this one.

Jean got this idea the other night when he was watching Eren subconsciously circling his fingers on the edge of the couch’s armrest. The blonde hasn’t played much with Eren’s leather fetish and he’s thinking he should do something that. He hopes Eren won’t mind some imitation leather.

When Jean bought his couch it came with an oversized ottoman, about the perfect size for a certain torso to lie across. It was too big to keep in the living room so it stayed in the corner of his computer room. It was upholstered in the same imitation leather that his couch is covered in and it has a firm cushion top. Jean tested it out, wasn’t too soft that he would sink in it or too hard that it would be uncomfortable for a longer period of time. The thing has pretty much never been used. Until now. It took some shifting of furniture but he finally got the ottoman in the living room. Once the coffee table got moved out of the way there was plenty of room for it between the couch and TV. There was no way it would fit in the bedroom.

Now, where did he put those leather thigh restraints?

\- - -

Eren had a late class to teach tonight so he doesn’t get to Jean’s till a little after 8:30pm. They’ve both already eaten and cleaned up so there isn’t a whole lot of waiting around once Eren arrives. Jean walks him into the living room and has him stand in front of the coffee table where his plans for tonight have been laid out.  Jean stands close behind him, chin hooked over his shoulder and arms wrapped around his waist.

“See anything you don’t want to do?”

Eren looks down at the objects in front of him. A black satin blindfold strip, thick black leather thigh restraints with attached leather cuffs for the wrists and a black silicone butt plug that Eren has not seen in Jean’s collection before. He gets new toys all the time so it’s never really surprising if Eren hasn’t seen the toy before. Looking down everything looks pretty tame but Jean doesn’t do tame, he’s got something up his sleeve, or this particular case, in his pocket, but the brunette doesn’t know that.

“Everything looks pretty good to me.” He turns his head and gives Jean a quick kiss. The blonde smiles back at him and detaches himself from his back.

“Safe words.”

“Green, green and green.” Eren doesn’t feel like being the perfect little sub tonight. He wants to rile Jean up a bit.

“No safe words. No scene play.” Eren pouts at Jean’s serious face.

“Fine. Yellow, green and red.” He knows it bothers Jean when he doesn’t say them in order. And Jean is tallying up the punishments in his head. Whether he’ll get to discipline him for all of them tonight or not, hasn’t been decided yet.

“Good enough.”

“So where are we doing this?” Jean inclines his head towards the ottoman behind Eren. The brunette turns around to look at it since he didn’t even see it in the room. His eyes light up when he notices that it is covered in the same leather as the couch. “I’m probably going to make a mess on that.”

“I hope so.”

Jean has slipped into his arm chair, casually sitting there with one leg draped over the arm. His amber gaze rakes over the brunette’s body head to toe, like always, visualizing the scene in his head before he acts on it. Eren feels a tingle run down his spine whenever Jean looks at him like that. It feels like he’s being appraised and in the end he knows he’ll be deemed worthy of whatever Jean has planned. When their eyes lock, his Dom sends him a wicked smirk.

“Take off your clothes for me and then get on all fours on top of the ottoman.”

Eren doesn’t respond he just starts stripping. He takes his time though for Jean. He knows the blonde has a fascination with his body. Could tell by the number of times he has caught him staring outside of their scenes. Once the last article of clothing is removed he assumes the requested position. Jean gets up from his chair and grabs the plug and the bottle of lube from the coffee table. As he walks by Eren along his side, he runs his fingers very lightly over his spine, just barely touching the skin. Once he’s behind the brunette he gives him a good slap on the ass.

“ _Mmmph_.”

“That’s for being a brat earlier.” Eren smiles to himself. He doesn’t get spanked nearly enough.

Jean pours lube onto his fingers and gently starts to circle one over the brunette’s entrance. His other hand grabs for Eren’s half hard cock and begins to stroke him into full hardness. Eren relaxes his neck, drops his head forward and let’s out a sigh. He pulls his bottom lip between his teeth when he feels the first finger start to push in. For how often they go at it, the first finger slides in easily. The blonde slides it in and out a few times before adding the second finger. He’s stroking Eren’s cock to the same rhythm as his fingers pumping into him. Slow and thorough. Eren’s breathing hitches when Jean grazes over his prostate. He lightly rubs his finger over it as he pulls his fingers out and apart in a scissoring motion, then repeats. The rubs against his nerves keep getting gradually harder on every pass. Jean stops stroking Eren’s fully hard cock and picks up the plug. Right as the brunette rocks his hips back on Jean’s fingers, he pulls them out. Eren whines that that wasn’t enough under his breath. He looks over his shoulder to watch his Dom lube up the plug. The new plug is probably about 4 maybe 5 inches. Has a slight taper to the tip and bulges out in the middle before tapering back in again toward the handle. Looks like fun.

“Color?”

“Green.”

Eren bites down on his lip and pushes his hips back to show how bad he wants it. As his Dom starts to slide the plug in, going slow so Eren can feel the stretch, Eren’s mouth falls open on a silent scream. _Fuck_ that’s good.

Jean kisses up Eren’s spine, sucking on a spot behind his ear, thumbs rubbing circles over his hip bones. Eren hums with appreciation.

“Get on your back” Jean backs off him and goes over to the coffee table again.

Eren turns over slowly. The plug is a little longer than the other ones he’s used before. It teases the edge of his prostate, a glimpse at what it’s capable of doing. He leaves the bottom of his ass and the top of his head hanging off the edge of the ottoman. Jean turns back to him with the thigh restraints. He squats down between the brunette’s legs and wraps the leather around toned thighs and makes sure the ring is hanging out on the outer thigh. Next, he grabs the matching leather wrist cuffs and buckles them on his sub’s wrists. He takes the metal clip on each wrist cuff and secures it to the ring hanging from the thigh bands. Now if Eren moves his arms his legs will follow and vice versa. The last item left on the coffee table is the satin blindfold. Jean runs the fabric through his fingers and stands over Eren’s head.

“Color?”

“Hmm. Green.”

The blonde places the fabric over Eren’s eyes and lifts his head to quickly tie it securely in the back. He eases his head back down, careful of the knot. He places a light kiss on Eren’s cheek.

He goes to stand in front of Eren, hands in his pockets. In his left pocket, he’s toying with stretchy silicone bands that will definitely help prolong this evening. In his right, he’s holding a black box. And on this box there are three buttons: on, down, and up. He pulls the box out of his pocket and examines it in his hands, then looks down at Eren, patiently waiting.

“You ready?”

“Yes.” He squirms on the ottoman just to feel the leather against his skin. Jean smiles to himself. He’s going to have some fun with Eren tonight.

\- - -

The sounds coming out of Eren’s mouth are obscene, borderline pornographic. You could say the same thing about the arch in his back and the way his body is writhing on the leather. Jean is lounging on the couch watching the erotic scene before him, plug remote in hand.

Jean turns downs down the vibrator again. “I’m pretty sure my neighbors could hear you that time.”

Eren’s chest is rising and falling quickly, trying to catch his breath. “Fuck your neighbors,” he moans.

“Ha. They wish.” Jean smirks over at Eren even though he can’t see. Eren’s biting his lip to hide his grin. “You holding up ok?” There’s a mock condescending tone to his question.

“That all you got? This is nothing.” Eren is fucking snarky tonight. He hasn’t said a single “ _Sir_ ” since they’ve started.

A cheshire smile spreads across Jean’s face. “Oh I can keep this going all night Eren.” He cranks the vibrator up to the highest setting for two seconds then back down to nothing. Eren’s body twitches when he cries out. “Or I could let you not come at all. How about that?” If Eren wants to play, Jean has no problem playing dirty.

“You w-wouldn’t do that.” Is that a hint of worry in his tone?

“I would.” Jean ups the vibration one notch. “I could keep you here all weekend”

He stands up from the couch. Another notch.

“I’d keep going tonight till you were right on the edge. Then leave.”

Another notch. Jean can see Eren’s arms tensing while he circles him slowly.

“You would stay out here all night. Hands bound so you wouldn’t be tempted to touch yourself.”

Two notches. The brunette is whimpering and moaning. Jean crouches down near Eren’s ear to whisper next.

“In the morning I’ll set this baby on high till you’re hard and screaming. And I’ll have entertainment with my morning coffee.” He grips Eren’s hair and pulls his head back. “Even then I wouldn’t let you come.”

Eren’s cock is furiously red and leaking despite the cock rings at the base of the shaft and the one just under the head. Those rings won’t let him reach his climax though.

“I could keep that up all day Eren. I would send you home frustrated and when you try to get yourself off it will be nowhere near as satisfying.”

Two more notches.

“ _Ngh. Fuck._ ” His moans are putting the porn industry to shame.

“So is that what you want Eren? You want to drag this out?”

Jean flicks the vibration up to the highest setting. Eren’s back bends itself into a high arch, hips lifting up to get that much higher. The only parts of his body touching the ottoman are the bottoms of his feet and his shoulder blades. He cuts his own cry short by clenching his teeth shut. Jean kills the vibration. The brunette moans a sigh of relief and his body relaxes itself back onto the leather surface.

“ _Jesus._ ”

“I’m afraid he’s not going to help you here.” Jean laughs. Eren barely manages to laugh.

He asks again, low, by his ear, “What do you want?”

A grin is slowly making its way across Eren’s face.

“I want you to _fuck_ me.” He bites his bottom lip and moans, fists clenching. “I want you to fuck me _hard_ into this god damn cushion. I want to feel the leather slipping under my skin. I want you to make me scream your name till my throat hurts. I want to feel your aftermath in the morning. I _want you_ …to fucking _wreck_ me.”

Holy shit.

Jean has always been a dirty talker in bed, whether it be in a scene or just “normal” sex. But he has never once had a partner respond like that.

He quickly stands from his crouching position and stands between Eren’s legs. He rakes his nails down his sub’s inner thighs till they reach his core. A shudder tears through the brunette’s body. Jean has one hand gripping a hip and the other slowly pulls the vibrator plug out of Eren’s hole. Once he abandons the plug on the floor (thank god for hardwood—easy clean ups), he reaches over Eren’s body and rips off the blindfold. Jean can see the want burning behind the raging blue green. Those eyes follow his hands as the go to unbuckle the leather cuffs around his wrists. Eren raises his eyebrows to that.

“You’re gonna want something to hold on to.”

And that’s the only explanation he get’s on the matter. He reaches into his pocket to grab the condom. Once it’s in hand Eren reaches for it and tosses it across the room.

“I want all of you.”

He hooks his legs around Jean’s thighs, he has nowhere to go. They’ve both been faithful and tested so they know they’re both clean. Jean has said it before and he’ll say it again, this boy will be the end of him.

“ _Fuck._ ”

He unties his pants and they fall to the floor. He coats his cock with lube, pulls Eren’s hips upward and lines up at his gaping entrance. Jean braces a knee on the edge of the ottoman as Eren grabs the sides. He enters in one hard thrust, no slow pace tonight. Another porn worthy moan rips from Eren’s mouth. The brunette’s nerves feel like they are on fire. Jean has his hips in a bruising grip pounding into him relentlessly, assaulting that bundle of nerves on almost every thrust. Eren is still tight, his heat squeezing Jean’s bare cock. And fuck it feels incredible. Eren asks for it harder, faster and Jean will do anything to please his sub. He shortens his thrusts and amplifies the force. Eren’s hips aren’t going to be the only ones bruised in the morning. The air in the room is getting thicker. Filled with the sounds of their flesh slapping together, panting breaths and Eren’s, rather loud, litany of Jean’s name. His voice is going to be broken tomorrow. His head is thrown back off the edge of the ottoman. He squeezes around Jean’s cock pulling moans from the blonde’s mouth.

“Jean please. I’m so c-close. Please. Please.” The cock rings are still preventing him from finishing. Jean can’t let go of Eren’s hips without dropping him.

“Go ahead.” He grits through his teeth.

The brunette’s hands fly to release the ring at the base of his shaft and then the one under the head. One thrust after they’re removed and Eren’s orgasm tears through him, Jean’s name on his lips. He squeezes around Jean again, pulling him over the edge. He continues to fuck Eren through his orgasm. He can feel the walls inside become slick with his come. When he pulls out Eren gasps, because after the night he’s had, he’s extra sensitive, and Jean watches come pool out of his hole.

“ _God_. You’re fucking _filthy_.” And he means that the best way possible.

He sets Eren’s hips back down on the ottoman and crawls over him. Eren lifts his head to meet Jean in a passionate kiss, tired arms wrap around the blonde’s neck to pull him down closer.

A knock at the front door interrupts them.

“What the—Seriously!?“

Jean looks at the clock, it’s almost 11pm. He pulls himself away from Eren (much to both of their disappointment), quickly cleans himself with a random article of clothing before throwing his pants back on. He tosses a shirt at Eren so he can cover himself up and goes to the door. It’s the woman from the complex’s main office. Shit. He opens the door.

“Mr. Kirschtein, sorry to bother you. One of the neighbors complained about some noise earlier and I just wanted to come by and make sure everything is…ok.”

By the time she finishes her sentence her eyes land on Eren sitting upright on the ottoman, leaning slightly back on his arms wearing an amused smile. It’s very evident that there is nothing on underneath the shirt he has draped over his lap. Jean notices her staring and clears his throat to cover up a laugh. The woman has clearly caught on to what the noises were, based on the insane blush blooming in her cheeks.

“O-oh. Um. Yes, well.” She can’t look either of them in the eye. “You two have a g-good rest of the night.”

“You, too.” Jean says as he’s closing the door.

“Good night!” Eren manages to yell before the door is all the way closed and Jean sees the woman through the window start to walk faster. Eren collapses back on the ottoman laughing hysterically. “Oh my god her face was priceless.”

“I guess next time I’ll just have to gag you so we don’t disturb our neighbors.”

“Mmmm screw them, you like it when I’m loud.” Jean can’t deny that.

He goes to stand back over Eren who is lying boneless across the ottoman. He’s going to have to get that cleaned now. Eren gives him a fucked out smile when he’s near.

“Shower?”

“Yeah.” Eren sighs. “I’m gonna need a crutch though. I can’t feel my legs.”

Jean snorts but reaches his arms out to pull Eren up and guides his jelly legs to the bathroom.

\- - -

When Eren leaves the next morning he sees Jean’s neighbors outside on their patio. He glances at Jean real quick, who’s standing his doorway, before looking back at the neighbors and giving them a suggestive wink. _Bet he can’t make her scream like that._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it ;)
> 
> I'll try to get another chapter up by Sunday but if not, I'm suppose to have Monday off work so it won't be too far away. I'm also going to try and go back and fix past chapters, just minor things like spelling and such. 
> 
> Thank you so much for all the comments and kudos!! They make my day. You guys are awesome!
> 
>  
> 
> \- - -  
> March 5th Update: fixed typos and formatting
> 
> Reference images (NSFW)  
> thigh restraints with cuffs: [here](http://www.extremerestraints.com/images/sv535aa.jpg)


	9. Late December, Year Zero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, Jean likes to worship his subs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOLY SHIT GUYS!!! Over a 1000 hits, are you freaking kidding!?! I don't even care if you didn't read this whole thing, it was still viewed 1000+ times. I don't think my face can get any redder. I'm squealing with giddy embarrassment guys, this is insane! 
> 
> \- - -
> 
> Sorry this was posted way later than I wanted. Sometimes words are hard :/  
> And this got a little fluffy again. I swear I have kinky stuff planned, just sit tight. I also have some of their back story planned so that might sneak in every once in a while, get a look of their lives outside the bedroom, kinda. Ugh this is turning into something bigger than I thought it would. I just can't stop though! Won't stop!

It is the week after Christmas. Both Eren and Jean took time off from work to visit family and to just have a break. Eren usually liked to take breaks the same time his students got breaks from school. It was his gift to them for all the hard work they’ve been doing in class. Jean has been saving up his vacation time from work for this time of year. Gives him time to head back home to see his parents, hang out with his friends and spend some quality time with his boyfriend.  


By now, everyone knows about them, friends and parents. Their friends said they had no idea that they were together but couldn’t say they were surprised. Reiner had explained that they had been acting chummy with each other for months before they revealed their relationship, so he suspected something. The boys didn’t tell them everything, like how their relationship actually started. There are some things that they didn’t need to know. All they needed to know was that they were together and happy. And that was enough for their friends.  


The conversation with their parents were a little different. They were surprised but all of them were more than accepting. They had dinner at Jean’s parents’ house to tell them. Jean’s dad had laughed that the boy that got his son in trouble for fighting back in school was now his boyfriend.  


“You pick on the ones that you like, right?” he’d asked Eren.  


Eren laughed. “Something like that,” green eyes turned to Jean then and winked at him. Jean’s response was a blush across his cheeks and a roll of his eyes. Eren’s charm worked on everybody. So naturally, Jean’s parents loved him.  


They had lunch with Eren’s parents, ironically at the same cafe Hanji had sent the two boys to meet. Eren’s mother had hugged Jean when they arrived and gave him a gentle smile. She could probably see that he was nervous. This wasn’t their first meeting however, all previous meetings happened in the high school principal’s office. Eren’s father shook his hand, a firm, confident grip, a slight pull of his lips that Jean assumed was a smile. They had a comfortable lunch with pleasant and easy conversation. When they left the cafe, Jean let out a sigh of relief.  


“Were you that nervous? It’s not like you haven't met them before.”  


“Yeah, I know.” The blonde runs his fingers through his hair and then starts the car. “I don’t know, there was this look your mom kept giving me, like she knew something.”  


Eren shifted in his seat and cleared his throat. Jean whipped his head to look at the brunette, eyes wide.  


“Are you shitting me!? Your _mother_ knows!?” Thank god Jean wasn’t driving yet, he probably would have caused an accident by stopping short.  


“She found out I was a sub a little over a year ago, ok? So when I told her I had a boyfriend she asked if it was a Dom I was seeing. You know I can’t lie for shit so I didn’t say anything. She took that silence as a yes.”  


“Jesus Eren. You could have told me she knew.”  


“That would have made you more nervous than you already were and I didn’t want that to be the only thing you were thinking about when we were sitting there with them.”  


Jean was quiet for a minute. “Does your dad know?” He has his eyes closed, head leaning back against the headrest.  


“Hell no. He had a hard enough time accepting the fact I was gay. I mean, he came around and we’re fine now but, god, I don’t think he could handle my extra curricular activities too.”  


Jean just nods his head.  


“She likes you.” The blonde turns to him with a hopeful look and Eren smiles back at him. “My mom is the least judgmental person I know. If she can easily accept her gay son who likes to get off while being whipped, she can accept the person who’s holding the whip.” Eren leans over the center console and puts his hand on the side of the blonde’s jaw. “Plus she likes anyone who can make me happy. And you make me _ridiculously_ happy.” 

The corner of Jean’s lips turn up. He allows himself to be pulled closer by Eren’s hand and kisses him. It’s a chaste kiss that says everything they are both still afraid to say. A three word phrase that could change everything but still keep it the same.  


“You sure you have to go work tonight?” Jean pouts.  


“The other trainer backed out on Mikasa, I already promised I’d help out.” He pats Jean’s cheek playfully before leaning back into his seat. “You’re going to have me all to yourself tomorrow anyway.”  


Jean smiles at that. “Weather said it’s suppose to snow tomorrow.”  


“All the more reason to stay inside and snuggle up with you all day.” Eren pokes Jean’s bicep with his finger.  


“Sounds good.” Jean laughs and backs out of the parking spot. He drops Eren off at work and then heads home. 

\- - -  


They got two inches of snow over night and it was still snowing steadily after Jean woke up. He could see the fluffy white flakes falling through his bedroom window. The news predicted the area could get seven to nine inches. Jean didn’t want to spend more time in his cold bed than he had to, so he got up and put on some warm clothes. He grabbed his boots from deep inside his closet, laced them up and went outside to shovel. He’d rather shovel two inches now than all seven to nine inches later.  


When he stepped outside he was glad that it at least wasn’t windy. Just a calm light grey sky and flakes falling straight down to the ground. It’s still pretty early in the morning so Jean’s not surprised he’s the only one in the complex outside. It’s quiet. All he hears in the snow crunching beneath his feet as he walks to his storage shed. Flakes stick to his bangs that aren’t covered by his beanie and he sniffles from the cold air. He pulls his keys out to unlock the padlock on the door and it clicks open. He steps inside the dark space and goes to the back where he knows he left his small shovel. The complex usually will get a plow to come through and do the parking lot but they rarely have someone come to shovel the sidewalks and walkways. They will throw down a layer of sand and salt and let the sun to the rest. Jean prefers not risking his life walking on an icy sidewalk so he shovels a pathway from his door to his car parked directly in front of his apartment. He finds the shovel in the same spot he put it last season, and gets to work. The snow is still light and hasn’t been packed down yet. Clearing the snow shouldn’t take long.  


The blonde just finishes clearing the walkway when a snowball hits his shoulder and he hears a familiar laugh behind him. He turns to see Eren, eyes bright and a red nose, packing another snowball between his hands.  


“Don’t you dare.” The blonde points a gloved finger at him. Eren starts to walk toward him slowly with a shit eating grin on his face.  


“Don’t what?” Jean glares at him. Eren’s smile only widens.  


“Eren.” he warns, taking small steps backward, snow crunching under his feet.  


The brunette throws the snowball straight at the intended target. Jean drops the shovel and raises his arm in time for the snowball to burst against his forearm, snow flying in front of his face. In the seconds he was blinded by snow dust, Eren tackles him in a bruising embrace. Arms wrapped tight around his waist. The blonde almost loses his balance but Eren’s hold on him is tight enough so he won’t fall.  


“Asshole.” Jean mutters into his attacker’s coat. His hands travel up and across the broad shoulders pulling him in closer. He didn’t realize how cold he was until Eren pressed his body against his.  


Eren snickers, “This asshole brought stuff for some real homemade hot chocolate. And I make a mean cup of hot cocoa.” Jean hums at that and pulls away from Eren’s warmth. He nods his head towards the apartment.  


“Door’s open. I’ll be in in a bit. Just have to clear the snow around my car.”  


“Ok.” The brunette reaches up and brushes snow out of blonde bangs. “I’ll start the hot chocolate then.”  


Jean watches the brunette walk away, pick up his bag he placed on the sidewalk when he decided to play with the snow and walk inside. Eren looks back at him and sends a smile that spreads warmth through Jean’s chest and across his face in the form of a blush. By now, you would think Jean would be immune to Eren’s smile but it still makes him blush like a little school girl.  


No more than fifteen minutes pass and Jean is kicking the snow off his boots by the front door. He steps inside, takes off his wet hat, jacket and boots. The aroma of rich chocolate fills in the small apartment. The blonde follows the delicious smell to the kitchen where he finds Eren stirring the melted chocolate in a pot on the stove. He sneaks up behind him and presses his cold body against him.  


“Jeez! You’re freezing.” Eren jolts at the contact and Jean just wraps his arms tighter around the warmth. Jean feels a pat on his arm and he loosens his grip. Eren turns in his arms and returns his embrace by bring his arms up and around the blonde’s neck. “Hi.”  


Jean rests his forehead against the brunette’s, damp bangs cool against their skin. “Hi.”  


Eren scratches at the dark, shorter hair at the nape of the other’s neck. Jean closes his eyes and relishes their quiet moment.  


“You want to have a lazy day? Just lie on the couch and marathon terrible movies?” Eren speaks softly. The only response he gets is a hum. The brunette turns his head to plant a kiss on Jean’s cheek. “You go pick the first movie and I’ll bring out the drinks and snacks.”  


Jean reluctantly pulls away and heads towards the living room. Eren turns back to the hot chocolate and pours it into the mugs he set aside. He tops it off with some whipped cream and shaved chocolate pieces. He holds the handles of the two mugs in one hand and grabs the bag of cookies with the other and shuffles into the living room. Jean’s already selected a movie and is pushing the disc into the dvd player when Eren walks in. The drinks and snack are set down on the coffee table and Eren settles into the corner of the couch, drawing his feet up underneath him. Jean sits down close to him, sitting with his legs crossed on the middle couch cushion. As the blonde skips through the previews on the dvd and hits play, Eren hands him his mug of hot chocolate. He thanks him and takes a sip. It’s beyond delicious. Eren wasn’t kidding when he said he mean hot chocolate. It’s the perfect temperature, perfect ratio of chocolate and milk. It’s perfect because Eren made it. Jean realizes that the more time he spends with the brunette the more of a sap he becomes. He’s not sure if that’s such a bad thing yet.

\- - -  


They’ve been lying in comfortable silence close to 45 minutes. When the second movie ended they were both too comfortable to get up and switch discs. So Jean just turned off the dvd player and TV and burrowed in closer to Eren’s body heat. Between the first and second movie, when the blonde stood up to change out the discs, Eren stretched out across the couch on his back. Jean didn’t say a thing when he turned around, he simply lied partially on top of Eren, grabbed the remote and hit play again. His body is sandwiched between Eren and the back of the couch. His head rests on the brunette’s chest and one of his legs is hiked up on the other’s hip tangled between his legs. One arm is pressed against his own chest between their bodies and the other is wrapped around Eren’s waist. His thumb is idly rubbing over one of the brunette’s ribs. Eren has one arm bent back behind his head as a pillow and the other is behind Jean’s back, his fingers running up and down his spine. 

The blonde breaks the silence. “You want to play a little game?”  


“Mmmm, what kind?”  


“The kind where I tease you slowly.” He pauses. “Excruciatingly slow.”  


Jean can hear the smile on Eren’s face. “That actually sounds kind of nice.”  


“It can be.”  


“Am I being rewarded for something?”  


“Maybe.” Jean shrugs. “Or I’m just feeling particularly worship-y today and I don’t want you wearing a shirt anymore.”  


Eren chuckles at that and Jean’s head vibrates on his chest. “Ok.” His hand on Jean’s back runs up one last time into the shorter hairs on the back of his head. “Am I going to need safe words?”  


“Mmm, no. But if you want me to stop just say so.”  


“I doubt I’ll want you to stop.” 

He scratches lightly at the scalp under his fingers. Jean purrs at the sensation. The blonde lifts his head up and rests his chin on Eren’s chest. Blue-green eyes lock on the amber gaze looking at him. He can see a small flame behind those eyes, similar to the fire that burns behind them during their scenes but there’s something different about it. It doesn’t burn him like a fire in the summer night would, when the air is still hot and muggy from the day and the fire is there for the light not the warmth. This fire is like the one you light on an autumn night, where you are just far enough away that the cold air still bites your skin but the fire licks away the chill. Either way, his heart rate increases under the molten gaze. The gaze drops to his lips and Jean moves forward, leaning in to press his lips to the brunette’s.  


There is no harsh force behind the kiss. It’s gentle. Loving. Their lips move against each other, noses grazing as they tilt their heads to a more comfortable angle. Eren’s hand comes up to cup the side of Jean’s jaw, thumb smoothing over his sharp cheekbones. The blonde licks at the seam of the brunette’s lips, asking permission and the lips part willingly. The slide of tongues is almost curious but they move together in a familiar dance.  


Jean shifts so he’s straddling Eren’s hips. Their kiss still soft. Tongues exploring mouths, teeth scraping softly along lips. When their lips part, the blonde’s mouth leisurely works it’s way down Eren’s jaw, to his ear and the spot that drives Eren crazy, just under the hinge of his jaw. One way to make the brunette completely fall apart is to give his neck as much attention as possible. He’ll turn to putty in the hands of his holder. Jean makes sure to take his time. Lightly pull on Eren’s earlobe with his teeth, run his tongue along the shell of his ear. Soft kisses under his ear. His mouth hovers over the pulse in his neck, breathes hot air over the spot before running his tongue over the prominent vein and sucking on the skin. The tip of his nose nudges the underside of the brunette’s chin, telling him to tilt his head back. The blonde nips at his Adam’s apple then goes lower to the hollow of his throat. Dips his tongue into the concave space between his collar bones.  


Eren can do nothing more than let out pleased sighs and hums of appraisal. His hands run over the fabric on Jean’s back, up his neck, into his hair and back down. All their movements unhurried. No rush. It’s just an exploration of territory that is already so well known.  


Cool hands find their way under the hem of Eren’s shirt. They travel over the muscles of his abdomen, hiking up the fabric as they go, revealing a toned stomach and a thin line of hair that disappears into the waistband of his pants. Jean splays his hands over Eren’s ribs, feeling the rise and fall of his steady breathing. His mouth continues its trek over his clavicle to where Eren’s neck meets his shoulders. The brunette’s breathing hitches when Jean bites down on the muscle and soothes it over with his tongue. The blonde pulls back from his neck, sitting up in his lap. He doesn’t have to say a word, the brunette follows his movement, sitting up and keeping his hands over his head. Jean pulls the shirt off over Eren’s head and drops it next to the couch. Eren nods towards Jean’s own shirt and it too finds its place on the floor. A hand on the center of his chest tells the brunette to lie back down and he obeys. The blonde’s hands return to their previous spot on the bottom of Eren’s ribcage. His lips find the hollow of the other boy’s throat again and trails light kisses down the center of his chest, over his sternum. Knowing fingers slide north, thumbs running over and around the brunette’s nipples. Sloppy kisses move to one side of his chest. Tongue following the same path burned into the skin by the thumbs that were previously teasing him. Jean can feel Eren’s breathing becoming heavier under his hands. As he laves his tongue over the tan chest, he looks up from under his bangs to see Eren with a blissed out expression on his face. Still watching, he scrapes his teeth over the nub under his mouth. Eren’s mouth falls open on stuttering exhale. He smiles wickedly to himself as he moves to the other side, giving the other nipple the same treatment.  


Eren had his hands on the arm rest behind his head, but as soon as Jean started working on his chest, one hand ventured into blonde locks while the other rested over the nape of the other’s neck. A chill runs down the brunette’s spine, goosebumps break out over his skin. The careful and deliberate way Jean moves over him has him paralyzed. All he can do is lift his head and watch the movements in the blonde’s back. Shoulder blades pinched together, roving up and down with every shift of the hands on his tan skin. The curves and dips in his spine. The dimples on his lower back. He wants to run his hands over everything but Jean’s body is gradually getting further away the lower his mouth travels. Eren feels the waistband of his pants loosen and hears the sound of a zipper coming undone.  


Jean is working his way down the brunette’s abs, following the happy trail. He looks back up again at Eren who has his heated gaze fixed on him. The blonde keeps his stare as he licks at a patch of skin and then pull it between his teeth. Eren hisses through his teeth and puts his head back on the couch’s armrest, arms dropping to his sides. Heat has been slowly building his lower abdomen and by now his cock is almost fully hard. The warmth of Jean’s mouth travels to the side again, just above Eren’s hip bones. The blonde fists the denim under his hands and painstakingly pulls the jeans lower on Eren’s hips. Jean sucks on the bronze skin pulled tight over prominent hip bones. His tongue follows the V that dips under the fabric as more of the line is revealed. Eren gently lifts his hips so the pants can slide down easier. Jean sits up again and pulls the pants all the way down toned legs. He reaches up and does the same with the boxers that are still blocking the skin of Eren’s hips and the cock that’s pitching a small tent in the fabric. When the brunette is fully naked, Jean stares hungrily at his body.  


“You look like you’re going to devour me.” Eren laughs huskily.  


Jean places a hand under the brunette’s knee and carefully lifts it. He lowers his mouth to the inside of Eren’s knee and presses a small kiss to the skin and then another one just a little higher up Eren’s thigh.  


“I just might.” Amber eyes flick up to meet the brunette’s gaze, a toothy smirk pulling at his lips. 

That small flame from before has exploded into a bonfire. The air around them is still cool but the heat from that gaze sets Eren’s body on fire. It’s the look of a predator with its prey in its sight and it knows it will be an easy meal.  


Eren feels teeth graze the sensitive skin of his inner thigh. Jean latches his mouth onto the skin of the brunette’s inner thigh and sucks a dark bruise into the skin. He repeats the mark several more times on both thighs.  


Eren is starting to whine and squirm under Jean. His hands grip the cushion beneath him. He knows where he wants Jean’s mouth, but the blonde seems to be neglecting the heavy cock lying on his stomach. He keeps his head back trying to take deep breaths to stay calm and in the moment. Begging isn’t an option, he knows Jean won’t give into it. All he can do is lie here and endure this delicious torture. Apparently he doesn’t have to endure for long. Jean runs his hands up Eren’s inner thighs, up and over onto his hip bones and applies slight pressure. The blonde adjusts his body in a comfortable position between tan legs. He breathes hot over the flushed cock under his mouth. Eyes rove over the tense ab muscles clenching in anticipation. The blonde smiles to himself. Eren is falling apart. He gives a teasingly tentative lick under the head of the brunette’s cock.  


“ _Aahh_.” It comes out as a gasp. 

The brunette sucks on his bottom lip hard and tries to swivel his hips for more attention. The blonde complies. His tongue burns a hot stripe from the base to the head. Eren groans in response. Sloppy kisses trail up and down his length. A hand leaves his hip and holds the base of his cock. Jean twirls his tongue around the head, pointing the tip and teasing the sensitive spot underneath. Eren keens and grips the cushions tighter. Jean should not be allowed to be this good with his tongue. His warm mouth wraps around the head of cock, tongue still swirling around it, teasing the slit. He gently sucks on the head while his hand fists the base of Eren’s length and starts to pump what isn’t in his mouth yet. A thumb presses along the thick vein as the hand slides easily up and down. Moans are starting to spill from the brunette’s mouth. Jean really wants to hear more of that sound. Being wary of his teeth he eases more of Eren’s cock in his mouth. He bobs his head taking more of the length into his mouth each time he goes down.  


“ _Fuu_ —that’s good.” Eren sounds breathless. 

The hand gripping the back of the couch rests on top of Jean’s head. It doesn’t demand anything, it simply runs through the blonde locks. Jean hums around his cock causing Eren’s hips to twitch up. The hand still on Eren’s hip pushes down harder to try and keep him from bucking up into his mouth. On the next pull up, the blonde hollows his cheeks and sucks hard. Eren let’s out a short cry. Jean releases the cock from his mouth and let’s his hand temporarily take over. He moves to mouth at the base, rolling his tongue over the vein. His lips move lower again and licks a wet path from Eren’s ass, over his balls to the tip of his cock.  


“ _S-s-shit!_ ” 

The hand in Jean’s hair tightens and pulls on the longer strands. He barely gives Eren time to catch his breath before Jean relaxes his jaw and takes his whole length into his mouth. Eren’s moan bounces around the room. There we go, Jean thinks. His cock hits the back of the blonde’s throat and immediately Jean swallows around it.  


“ _Fucking hell!_ ” Jean hums around him. “ _Motherfuc-ahhAH_ ” Music to Jean’s ears.  


Eren fucking whimpers and tries to roll his hips. There’s a small choking sound and Jean pulls off again, hand resuming a slow pace in stead of his mouth.  


“Someone getting a little impatient?” God, he sounds so cocky, but really, he has every right to be, Eren is a fucking mess. He kisses the side of spit slick cock in his hand. Eren whines.  


“P-please don’t fucking s-stop.” 

Jean smirks at him through his bangs. “I won’t.” 

He takes Eren into his mouth again, bobbing and sucking with purpose. He swirls his tongue around the head one last time before swallowing his cock whole, trying to bring Eren over the edge.  


Eren can feel the back of Jean’s throat with his cock. Feels the squeeze every time he swallows. The brunette is close, heat coiling tighter in his gut.  


“Jean-n,” he warns. 

He tugs on the ashy blonde hair and Jean moans around him. The hand on his hip pushes down harder. Jean begins to pull up, tongue pressing hard under his cock, his front teeth ever so slightly grazing the sensitive skin. That’s enough for Eren to throw his head back on a silent scream. He comes into Jean’s mouth and the blonde swallows everything he’s given. He continues to suck until Eren starts whimpering from the over stimulation.  


Jean pulls his mouth off Eren’s cock with a slick pop and uses his thumb to wipe the corners of his swollen lips. His cheeks are heated with a blush and his hair is going in every direction from Eren running his fingers through it. Both their chests are heaving, trying to catch their breath. When Eren finally looks at Jean he sees him wearing a smug smile. He can’t help but think that that is a damn sexy look on his face. An expression he totally deserves to wear. The brunette partially sits up to grab the back of the blonde’s head and crashes their lips together. He can taste the smug smile still on his lips along with his own taste. Eren bites and tugs on Jean’s lower lip breaking their kiss.  


“Want me to return the favor?” he whispers the words against Jean’s lips. 

The blonde’s eyes are closed and he nods his head. He leans back on his legs and eases himself off the couch. Jean keeps his eyes on Eren’s as he slowly walks backwards towards his bedroom. Eren groans and rubs his face, he didn’t want to have to move from the couch. He hears Jean snicker at him, which makes the brunette turn to look back at him. Pale fingers are working open the button of his jeans and the zipper.  


“I’ll let you touch this time.” His voice is still a little wrecked from the cock he had down his throat. 

When he pulls his hands away, Eren’s eyes are wide with lust. The fucking _minx_ is wearing the lace panties he tortured him with months ago and hasn’t worn since. Eren bolts off the couch to chase Jean down the hall to his bedroom, where they stay for the rest of the night. 

\- - -

The bedroom is bright in the morning. The sun reflecting off the snow shines white light through the windows. Jean’s already awake watching the sleeping body next to him. Eren’s beside him still peacefully sleeping. It amazes the blonde that he can sleep on his stomach with half his face smushed into the pillow. Jean adjusts himself so he’s lying on his side with his head propped up on his elbow. Careful fingers brush through dark locks. The contrast between the dark hair and his pale fingers is beautiful to him. He watches the soft hair twist between his fingers and unravel as it falls back into place. The tan body begins to stir. Jean sees dark eyebrows furrow together in the typical morning confusion and then relax. The one visible eye slowly blinks open, flashing deep blue and rich green.  


“G’mornin’” It’s mumbled and groggy. Eren stretches his body, his back and other joints popping awake. He echoes Jean’s position, on his side, head propped up in his hand.  


“Morning.” He really can’t help the goofy smile that spreads over his face because Eren smiles back at him. The brunette leans in and places a chaste kiss on Jean’s lips. When he leans back, his eyes widen like he just remembered something important.  


“Can we go play in the snow?” Jean laughs at him. He’s like an excited little kid after the first snowfall.  


“How about breakfast first?” Eren pouts playfully pushing out his bottom lip.  


“Fine. Breakfast and then we go play in the snow?” The blonde laughs again, ruffling the brunette’s bedhead before he rolls out of bed.  


“Come on then, the quicker you get up, the faster you can get out in the snow.”  


Jean has never seen Eren move that fast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We might be heading back in time, next chapter. We'll see if my brain cooperates.


	10. Late June, Year Zero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Going back to one of the early days. Eren's had a rough day, mind as well finish that way too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've gotten so many kudos and positive comments on this fic. I love knowing that people like it that much. I started writing this because there just were not enough strictly Jean x Eren fics, so I wrote something I would want to read. So I'm glad I'm not the only one enjoying it. 
> 
>  
> 
> Now, on a side note:  
> There is a _tiny_ bit of rough play in this. I want to make perfectly clear that it’s part of the scene **not** abuse. In this au, Eren knows several types of martial arts so he knows the limits of his body and how to protect it. And although it isn’t written out here, I imagine these two discussing in detail what is allowed and what is not beforehand. BDSM is all about being “safe, sane and consensual.” I would **never** write a scene where no consent was given. Just want to put that out there.

Jean is just walking through his front door when he gets a text from Eren.

 **E:** You busy tonight?

 **J:** Literally just getting in from work…so no 

Jean’s work schedule got switched to the late shift. Instead of 9 to 5 he’s working 11 to 7. So now he isn’t getting home till at least 7:45 every night. Eren is suppose to be in the middle of a class right now so he doesn't know why he’s texting him. His phone goes off again.

 **E:** Can I come over after class lets out?

Jean stops for a second. Is he asking to come over for a casual hang out or for something more sexual in nature? They haven’t really talked about their next scene yet. Their last scene was four days ago so Jean still has time to come up with something for this weekend. He has nothing prepared for tonight though. Although, it’s been a while since the blonde has fully improvised a scene. There have been in-the-moment decisions during a planned out scene but nothing more than that. But, Jean’s getting ahead of himself. Eren only asked to come over, that doesn’t mean he’s looking for a scene, right?

 **J:** Sure. Want me to call in some Chinese?

He doesn’t want to assume anything. Plus he’s hungry.

 **E:** Not really in the mood for food.

Well, that answers that.

 **J:** Ok. Let me know when you’re on your way.

His class probably has another 15 minutes or so. That gives Jean about 35 minutes to get something in his stomach and think about something for them to do. Although, if Eren is asking to come over he might have something specific in mind, so he shouldn’t get into tiny details.  


The kitchen is pulled apart in Jean’s attempt to find something quick to eat. He settles on pasta with a side of bread and butter. Once he sits down to eat he practically inhales the food. By the time he’s putting his plate in the sink he hears Eren’s fist pounding on the door.

“It’s open!”

He hears the door open and then shut rather harshly. That’s Eren for you, obnoxious as ever. Eren walks into the kitchen and drops himself into a chair at the table. Jean leans against the counter and observes the brunette. His hair is still damp from a shower. His eyes are down and he’s fiddling with his fingers in his lap. Looks like he’s coming down from one of his rages. It takes a lot for him to snap now a days, especially since he works at a martial arts gym. Martial arts has been his anger outlet since middle school.

“You ok?” the blonde asks.  


“‘M fine.” Jean doesn’t buy that and Eren knows it. 

The blonde nods towards Eren’s bruising knuckles. “What happened?”  


The brunette takes a deep breath and a wicked smile pulls at his lips. “I may have punched a homophobic asshole in the face. Guy was talking shit during class.”  


Jean huffs a laugh, as much as he strongly dislikes ignorant people, he has sympathy for that guy. Eren can pack a punch. “Are _they_ ok?”  


He shrugs. “Might have fractured his nose.”  


“Only fractured?” he teases.  


Eren’s grin widens, “Yeah, well, one of the other guys pulled me away before the hit could cause any serious damage.” Blue-green eyes peak up through his bangs to look at Jean. 

“So why’d you come here?” Eren shifts in the chair, eyes back down at the floor, but the blonde can tell he’s trying to hide his grin. “You want to be punished for what you did or something?”

“Maybe.” He leans back in the chair and looks back up at Jean. He’s got his bottom lip between his teeth. 

Jean gets serious for a moment. “You in a good headspace to do this tonight?”

The brunette nods his head. “I took the rest of the aggression out on the heavy bag for the rest of class and I cooled off on the ride over here. I’m good, I promise.”

Jean stares at him, trying to get a read. His anger has definitely died down but he still seems a little wound up. That could just be his adrenaline, though. Kid gets excited easily. The blonde rubs the back of neck.

“Alright. C’mon.” 

Jean leaves the kitchen and heads to the bedroom, Eren just a few steps behind. When he walks into the room he heads for the dresser. He actually refers to it as his toy chest, but no one else needs knows that. He grabs the key on top and unlocks the top drawer, which unlocks the rest of them as well. The blonde pulls open the drawer just a bit to make sure it got unlocked and then steps back. He turns back to Eren and gestures to the dresser.

“Pick what you want.”

Eren’s eyebrows disappear into his hair and his eyes widen. He’s never been able to pick. The blonde steps to stand beside the dresser, leaning against the wall and watches Eren approach the drawers. The brunette knows that all the toys and accessories are in the top drawers and the ropes and restraints are in the bottom two drawers. He hasn't gotten a chance to actually look in them before, just quick glances when Jean opens them during a scene. A hesitant hand wraps around the handle of the propped open drawer and pulls it out the rest of the way.  


It’s remarkably organized. Each item is sectioned off into its own cubby. The top drawer holds smaller items and necessities: different types of lubricants, condoms, safety shears, gloves, blind folds, nipple clamps, pinwheels, cock rings and gags. The second drawer houses melting candles, vibrators, butt plugs and dildos. The third drawer is what Eren is after. It contains all Jean’s crops, paddles, slappers and floggers. There’s a range of types: wood, leather, some with feathers, others with short spikes.  


Eren always considered himself pretty kinky, but Jean can out kink him any day. He’d love to let loose one day and just have Jean go to town on him but it’s still really early in their partnership to do that. One day, maybe.  


Eren runs his fingers over the crops. On any other night he’d ask for one but he’s looking for a bit more tonight. He looks over at Jean who has been quiet this whole time watching him. He quirks a curious eyebrow at the brunette. The amber gaze does not stray from Eren even when he starts going through the drawers again, pulling items out and placing them on top the dresser. Eren pulls out lube, condoms and a ball gag from the top drawer and a leather slapper from the third drawer. He holds the handle of the slapper out to Jean. The blonde takes it and inspects it in his hand. It’s a total of 18 inches long, about 2 inches at the widest point and it has two thick layers of leather for the impact area. His eyes snap up to Eren’s face.  


“This it?”  


“Uhh…you can get rough with me, too. Push me around a little bit.”  


“Ok.” The blonde glances at the gag. “Do you want the gag on the whole time or just a portion of the time?”  


Eren looks at the gag and contemplates the question briefly. “I want to try to have it the whole time.”  


“You remember the non-verbal cues?”  


The brunette nods his head. “Two knocks or taps for slow down and three to stop completely.”  


Jean starts to loosen his tie until the knot is completely undone. “Do you need a few minutes or are you good to go?  


“Good to go whenever.”  


“Ok. Just give me a minute then.”  


The slapper is placed on top of the dresser for now. The blonde pulls the tie from his collar and undoes the top two buttons. He walks over to his closet to put his tie away. He removes his watch, belt, shoes, socks, and empties his pockets. Next he unbuttons his sleeve cuffs and rolls them up to his elbows. He rolls his neck and inhales deeply and lets out the breath slowly. Eren watches him prepare, fascinated by his transformative process. The blonde walks to the door and swings it shut with the flick of his hand.  


His friend Jean is gone. His Dom, Sir, is here. And sub Eren is excited to play.  


Jean approaches Eren and shoves harshly at the center of his chest with his finger tips using the force of his whole arm to direct the brunette backward. The force knocks Eren back a couple of steps.  


“Up against the wall.” 

Eren obeys and walks backwards towards the wall, conveniently close to the dresser, eyes never leaving Jean’s. The blonde follows closely, their chests a little over a foot apart. When Eren is just inches away from the wall, Jean pushes at his chest again so his back makes an impact with the wall. The blonde moves fast, grabbing Eren’s wrists, slamming them above his head, kicking his legs wider and propping his thigh between the brunette’s legs. Jean leans in close. A feral smile spreads over his face.  


“You really did come here to get punished didn’t you?” His grip on the brunette’s wrists tighten.  


“This your way of sticking it to that guy? By coming to me?” Jean is pressing his thigh higher and harder between Eren’s legs.  


“Came all the way here to get a thick cock up your ass to make you feel better.”  


The added pressure on the brunette’s hardening cock makes him lean his head back, hitting the wall, on a loud exhale. The blonde glances down to where his thigh is pressed, noticing the outline of his sub’s cock starting to strain against his zipper. Jean raises an eyebrow looking back up at Eren’s face. He leans forward to talk in his ear.  


“You want it like this? Right here against the wall?” He rolls his thigh against his crotch, building up friction. Eren squirms and groans behind clenched teeth.  


“Yes please, _Sir_.” He hides his smirk by biting down hard on his bottom lip. He stares up into Jean’s burning eyes.  


“If you’re good for me maybe I’ll give you what you want.”  


Eren tries to arch his back to grind down harder on Jean’s thigh. The blonde’s response is immediate. He lowers his thigh and raises Eren’s arms higher, making him stretch beyond his limit. A shuddered moan escapes the brunette’s lips.  


“ _Fuck you_.” the brunette rasps. His chest is already heaving, adrenaline pumping in his veins.  


Jean’s face twists with a wicked smirk. He removes his thigh and let’s go of Eren’s wrists. The brunette keeps them crossed above his head but whines from the loss of friction. Jean’s next movements are as quick as his first. He grips the front of Eren’s shirt to pull him away from the wall just a little bit. The shirt flies over Eren’s head. The blonde grabs him roughly by his shoulders to spin him around.  


“Brace yourself.” 

He forces Eren against the wall, his hands hitting just before the rest of his upper body. He turns his head so the side of his face is pressed against the wall. Jean hovers over him, pale hands splayed out bedside Eren’s, chest pressed against his upper back. 

“If your hands leave the wall, you get an extra welt on your ass, you understand?”  


The brunette nods his head, “Yes, Sir.”  


Eren swallows hard. He watches Jean from the corner of his eye. The blonde still has a smirk on his lips. He remembers when they fought back in high school, Jean always had a gruesome smile on his face. No matter what was said or how bloody their mouths got, he always bared his teeth with a mocking grin. Eren was just the same. The brunette smiles to himself just thinking about it. They fuck the same way.  


The harsh sensation of nails raking down his sides wipes the smile off his face.  


“ _Shit_.”  


Those fingers trace the V of his hips to the button on his jeans. Expert fingers pop the button open and slide the zipper down. The pants are forcefully pulled down to his ankles. He steps out of the pant legs and then they disappear in a rush of flying fabric.  


Jean reaches over the top of the dresser for the ball gag. Eren chose the one with the black leather strap (of course) and red silicone ball. He holds the gag in one hand and firmly grips the hair on top of Eren’s head with the other. With a vicious tug, he pulls the brunette’s head back. He brings the ball in front of Eren’s mouth.  


“Color?”  


Eren’s tongue runs over his lips, soaking them. “Green.”  


He opens his mouth wide and Jean places the ball between his teeth. He gives Eren a second to get a comfortable grip on the ball and pulls his hand away. The hand in his hair let’s go and Eren presses his forehead to the wall. Jean takes the straps hanging from the ball and brings them back behind his sub’s head. He makes sure the straps are not twisted and fastens the buckle. His hands fall to the brunette’s ass. Jean leans in, gripping the flesh in his hands.  


“You ready for your punishment?” His hot breath ghosts over Eren’s ear, fingers kneading into cloth covered cheeks. “How many should I give you? Hm?”  


Eren pushes his hips back, earning a tighter grip on his ass.  


“Ten?” He gives one final squeeze and backs away from the brunette.  


“Twenty?” Jean reaches for the slapper on the top of the dresser. He runs his fingers along its edge. Eren whines impatiently.  


“Thirty?” Eren pulls his head away from the wall to glare back at Jean. The blonde licks at his bottom lip and meets Eren’s glare with his fiery gaze.  


“Thirty it is.”  


The first ten strikes are the warm up. Eren still has his boxer briefs on so that helps cushion some of the blows, but it also helps build the pleasure. Jean’s really good at impact play. Constantly switching the spot of each hit, varying the speed and strength the slapper falls at. Striking one cheek, then both, maybe the top of thigh. Never the same area twice during the warm up. When the first ten are over, Eren feels the pleasant burn on his pink bottom. Jean crouches down behind him to pull down his briefs, exposing the brunette’s ass to the cooler air of the room. Strong hands knead at his cheeks again, getting Eren’s ass a pretty pink color. Jean gropes him, pushing him forward a bit so the head of his cock kisses the wall. Eren gives a small moan around the ball. One of the blonde’s hands pulls away briefly and returns pressing cool slick fingers over Eren’s entrance. Eren’s body visibly shivers. It’s only been four days but he really fucking wants it. He’s getting close to desperate for it. And Jean’s just taunting him.  


He breathes in his ear, “Ten hits gets you one.” He thrusts one of his fingers in. “Twenty will get you two. And depending how good you are, thirty might get you more.”  


The single finger is pushing in and out in an unhurried, teasing pace. That one finger isn’t going far enough. It’s not thick enough. Eren needs more.  


Jean pulls his finger out and adjusts his grip on the handle of the slapper in his other hand. The next ten blows are harder. Faster. Louder. Each resounding crack pulling muffled moans from Eren’s throat. The brunette’s hands try to grasp the wall but he comes up empty.  


By the time Jean gets to eighteen…nineteen…twenty, the skin on Eren’s ass and upper thighs burns. Jean’s hand feels cool against his raw skin and the two fingers stretching his hole makes Eren groan in dire frustration. The blonde can tell this isn’t enough for his sub. Tan hips try to rock back on his fingers but he pulls away before Eren can get any pleasure from it. He has been behaving so far. Maybe a little reward?  


Jean scissors his fingers a few more times then thrusts his two fingers in deep. Eren actually manages a loud cry around the ball in his mouth. This is what he wanted.  


The fingers inside him are relentless, rubbing hard on his prostate. Eren’s legs are shaking trying to keep him upright. His teeth digging into the silicone in his mouth. Every brush over his nerves attempts to force another cry out his throat. All he can do is clench his jaw tighter, squeeze his eyes shut and endure. His cock keeps twitching between his legs, furiously hard and leaking pre come from the tip. If Jean keeps this up, he’s probably going to come before Jean even fucks him.  


Just when Eren is right on the edge, Jean withdraws his fingers.  


“Did you think I was going to let you come before your punishment was over?” He rubs the slapper against his ass, letting him know what’s coming.  


“You still have ten left before your reward.”  


The final strikes. They are, again, harder and louder, but the blonde pauses in between, building the anticipation. He alternates between blows and caressing his skin with the leather. By the time the thirtieth strike lands on Eren’s ass, he’s panting, trying to catch his breath through his nose. Jean waits till his back stops heaving. He places the slapper back down on the dresser. He takes a minute to remove his clothes and then stands close behind the brunette’s back, wet fingers tracing his entrance.  


“You want it?” 

Eren’s hands clench tighter, knuckles turning white. He’ll take that as a yes.  


He pushes in two fingers and then eases in the third. Eren lets out a shuddering moan around the gag. The blonde doesn’t tease the sensitive spot, just concentrates on the stretching. When he feels Eren is ready, he removes his fingers and grabs for the condom still on the dresser. He rips it open with his teeth and slides it down his cock. Jean slicks up his length with more lube and runs it between Eren’s red cheeks. The brunette whines around the gag. So needy.  


The head of his cock sinks into the wet hole. He gives short thrusts pushing and pulling the head in and out, driving Eren mad. Just when he’s had enough, Jean slams in his entire length in one brutal thrust. Eren sees stars. In this moment he really fucking loves Jean’s cock. He’s so full. The head rubbing over the bundle of nerves that sets him on fire. He rolls his hips feeling it slide inside him. If he didn’t have a gag in his mouth he’d probably be praising Jean like he was a god. He’d asked for it rough, so that’s how he gets it.  


Jean starts pounding into him savagely. The slapping of skin echoes loud in the room. His cock teasing his sub’s prostate. His grip on Eren’s hips are tight and controlling. Eren has his hands in fists above his head. His forehead is resting against the wall. The gag is starting to feel tight around his face and his teeth sink deeper into the silicone ball. He wants to scream but the ball mutes most of his noises. His jaw is starting to ache from being forced open this long and breathing just through his nose if getting harder. He thought he could make it through the scene but the gag has to go. He balls his fists tighter and knocks twice on the wall. Jean slows his pace to a complete stop and slips out. The brunette points to the gag and shakes his head. Jean’s hands quickly go to the buckle on the back of Eren’s head, unlatches the gag and eases the ball out of his mouth.  


“You alright?”  


Eren wipes at the spit around his mouth with the back of his hand.  


“Mhmm, jaw started to hurt.” His breathing is still heavy.  


“Want a minute?”  


Eren looks over his shoulder, “I’m good.” 

He adjusts his stance, pressing his hands flat against the wall again. Light fingers run up the nape of his neck into his hair.  


“You have to give me a color.”  


“Green, Sir.”  


Jean’s grip tightens in Eren’s hair and roughly thrusts back into his gaping hole. The brunette groans, loud and deep, in his throat. The new pace is slow but forceful. The blonde pulls out steadily, leaving in just the head of his cock, then slams his hips forward. Each thrust brushes over the bundle of nerves perfectly, rendering Eren to nothing but constant cries and moans. Jean likes it so much better when Eren is loud. He can feel Eren getting close, his hole gripping his cock tight, legs are starting to shake. Eren chokes back a sob when his Dom pulls out suddenly. He’s spun around and Jean grips the back of his thighs and hoists Eren up onto his hips. Sometimes Eren forgets how deceiving strong the blonde is. Jean drives Eren's back against the wall and slides his cock into his greedy little hole. He pistons his hips up hard and fast.  


“ _Aahhaha, FUCK! Fuck fuck…fuck_.” Eren clenches his eyes shut. His mouth is hung open spilling curses and vulgar moans.  


The brunette latches onto his Dom’s back, raking his nails across his shoulder blades. He moans next to Jean’s ear while the blonde grunts into Eren’s neck. They’re both close. Three more thrusts and Eren’s moan gets caught in his throat when comes on both their chests. The rhythm of the blonde’s hips are erratic. He just needs a little bit more. One of Eren’s hands grips the hair on the back of Jean’s head and pulls. And that’s it. Jean’s orgasm rips through him, sinking his teeth into the brunette’s shoulder.  


When he comes to, he can feel the weight of Eren’s boneless body starting to slump against him. He gently pulls out and carries Eren the few feet over to set him on the bed. He cradles his face in his hands running his thumbs over his cheeks.  


“Hey.” He keeps his voice soft. “You still with me?”  


Eren nods his head subtly. He went in a little into his sub headspace.  


“Lie down. I’ll be right back ok?” He waits for Eren to be fully situated before he goes to the bathroom to dispose of the condom and grab a warm cloth to clean up.  


Eren’s still right where he left him when he comes back into the room. Jean wipes the mess off his stomach and climbs onto the bed with him. The blonde is usually not a cuddle kind of person. The only time he does it are times like these when his subs need it. He pulls Eren close to him, tangling their legs, wrapping his arms around his back and running his fingers through the short hairs on his neck.  


“Just take your time, I’m not going anywhere.”  


They stay that way close to 35 minutes. Jean knows when Eren comes out of it once he starts nuzzling into the crook of his neck.  


“You back in the land of the living?” He can feel Eren’s smile against his skin.  


“Yeah.”  


“Good. You want a snack or a shower first?”  


“Depends on the snack.”  


“We’ll have to raid the kitchen to see what I have.”  


“Mmmm, then shower first.”  


They shower quickly and Jean tells Eren to lie down while he goes to find a snack. 

\- - -  


The two of them are lying on Jean’s bed, side by side, still partially coming down from the scene high.  


“You _really_ like getting rough with me don’t you?” Eren watches Jean’s profile.  


He huffs a laugh, “Cause I know you can handle it. Whatever I dish out on you, you could easily turn the tables and probably return it tenfold.” Eren gives him a wide grin but then goes quiet for a minute, a curious expression on his face.  


“Would you ever want me to? Turn the tables, I mean.” Jean only shrugs.  


“Not any time soon.” He looks at Eren. “The last time I did role reversal was with the Domme that trained me. I would be extremely picky on what I allowed you to do.” Jean looks back up at the ceiling. “Plus part of my fantasy is knowing you _could_ overpower me, not actually being overpowered.”  


“I get it.” Eren’s brows furrow in thought. The blonde can tell he has more to say.  


“What is it?” He looks at Eren expectantly.  


The brunette hesitates for a moment. “What if the roles weren’t reversed the whole scene? Just one moment of being overpowered but then you get control back?”  


“Is that what you want to do?”  


“No—well—I—I wouldn’t be opposed to the idea but we always seem to do what I want. Just want to make sure you’re covering your bases too.”  


Jean laughs through his nose. “Don’t worry, I’m covered. Thanks for the concern though.”  


Eren grins, “Don’t want you getting bored.”  


“You saw the inside of those drawers right? I’ll never be bored.” They both laugh.  


They stay quiet for a few minutes after that. Jean can feel sleep starting to take him. Movement next to him broke the fog though.  


“Mm, what time’s ’t” Eren’s has a sleepy slur to his words.  


Jean lifts himself up on his elbows to see his alarm clock. “Ugh, it’s just about midnight”  


“Shit. I should go before Mikasa sends out a search party.”  


Jean watches the brunette slowly sit up and hiss when his ass comes into contact with the cotton sheets. Fuck, Jean’s probably going to regret this.  


“You can stay here. If you don’t want to drive home.”  


Eren looks back at the blonde for a second. “That wouldn’t be weird?”  


Jean stares at him with an incredulous expression. “I just spanked you with a paddle then fucked you against the wall and you’re worried that sleeping next to each other is going to be weird?”  


“Sorry, some people are weird about it.” Jean just shakes his head and plops back down on his pillow. Eren looks around the room, “Where’d you throw my pants?”  


“Check the foot of the bed.” 

Eren stands up to check. Yup, his pants are there. He digs through the pockets for his phone to text Mikasa and Armin letting them know he’s not coming home tonight. While he’s doing that, Jean gets up to put on some boxers and leaves the room to lock up and turn off lights in the rest of the apartment. When he walks back into the bedroom Eren’s still standing there naked, typing away on his phone. The guy literally has no shame. He’s damn proud of his body and he doesn’t see the point in hiding it, especially if a person has seen him naked on more than several occasions, like Jean. Not that Jean is complaining. It’s like looking at a living, breathing, Greek sculpture. His eyes linger for just a second more then crawls back into bed. The brunette finishes his text conversation, turns off the light and slides in next to Jean. As he’s rolling over onto his stomach his foot brushes Jean’s.  


“Fuck, your feet are freezing.”  


“Sorry. Not all of us can be fricken space heaters like you.” Jean doesn’t sound amused. Eren just cackles.  


“Good night, Jean.”  


“Night.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few of you have asked about the collar...it's coming ;)
> 
> \- - - 
> 
> Reference images (NSFW):
> 
> slapper: [here](http://thepleasurechest.com/images_products/9913_big.jpg)  
> ball gag: [here](http://thepleasurechest.com/images_products/9181_big.jpg)


	11. Late January, Year Zero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s something about coming home after an annoying day at work to find a pleasant surprise waiting for you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I struggled writing this chapter for days. I actually had something completely different written out (a little over 3,500 words) and scrapped it because it wasn't what I wanted. I didn't have any actual good inspiration until last night. I scrambled to write a quick description paragraph that turned out to be about a page and half long before I fell asleep. 
> 
> So here it is, the return of the collar! It is not the main focus of the scene though. If any of you were looking for puppy or pony play, sorry, that's not going to happen.
> 
> As always, thanks so much for reading! Hope you enjoy!

Jean got called into work for an IT department fiasco emergency on a Saturday. Servers were crashing like crazy and the weekend engineering team that was there trying to fix it was only making it worse. So they called Jean…at four in the morning. He hadn’t been sleeping for long and there was a warm, naked body next to him that kept swearing at him to answer his damn phone. He answered the phone and took the call into the hallway so he wouldn’t disturb Eren trying to fall back to sleep. After arguing with the engineer on duty over the phone, trying to walk him through what to do, Jean got fed up and said he’d be there as soon as he can. He got dressed as quickly as possible and then tried to wake Sleeping Beauty to tell him he had to leave. The brunette grumbled and attempted to lure Jean back into bed but failed. He promised to be back as soon as he was able. 

And after a grueling 13 hours, the blonde was walking back through his front door. The apartment was dark and quiet, which months ago would have been normal, but he knows Eren is here, his car is outside. Jean toes off his shoes and walks further into the apartment, each room lit from light spilling in from the windows. He heads for the hallway and notices an orange glow from under the bedroom door. The door creaks on its hinges when it swings open. And there’s Eren. 

He’s lying on his back across the width of the bed, his body twisted at the hips so his knees can lie comfortable to one side that way his feet won’t hang off the edge. He’s reading a magazine, held high above his face, probably one of the latest fighting magazines he subscribes to. Now, this would be a fairly normal picture if it weren’t for what Eren was wearing. 

Wrapped around his neck, is the leather collar Jean bought him months ago. It had started as another play thing for scenes, but it grew to have more meaning. It was a symbol that Eren belonged to him. Not in a slave and master kind of way but just as a submissive belonging to a dominant. He doesn't always wear it during their scenes, especially if rope is involved because usually the rope needs to go around the neck. Every once in a while he will wear it around the apartment, just because he can. And if he is feeling particularly scandalous, he will wear it outside, in public. Jean almost combusted in his seat when he met up with Eren for lunch one day and he walked into the restaurant wearing the collar.

Moving down his body, the brunette is shirtless, his sculpted torso free for Jean’s eyes to oogle. But what knocks the air from Jean’s lungs is what Eren has on from the waist down. 

Hugging tight to his waist is a black latex garter belt. It’s split down the middle on the front, held together by a teal cord criss-crossing through silver grommets. The straps that run down the front and side of his thighs are holding up black sheer latex thigh high stockings. And to tie the whole look together, teal satin panties. 

If Jean had been a weaker man he would have fell to his knees at the sight. When they originally sat down to talk about preferences, Jean had mentioned his latex fetish in passing, he didn’t really elaborate, just said he liked it. He didn’t think Eren would have remembered. But Jean has to give the brunette some credit. Eren is the type of person that will remember a little thing you said and then anywhere from days to years (yes, years) later, he’ll surprise you. And this is definitely a surprise.

Eren turns and tilts his head back to look at door when it creaks open. He watches each expression flit across the blonde’s face when he walks in. Exhaustion, confusion, shock, lust, and finally, utter desperation. The brunette bites down on his lower lip to suppress the victorious smile trying to spread across his face. Yeah, he did good. 

Jean rubs at his face, “What are you trying to do to me?” He meant to say that to himself but the sound of Eren’s laugh indicates he said that loud enough for him to hear. “How long have you been lying there?”

“Umm, little over an hour I think.” He lets the magazine drop and rest against his chest.

The blonde looks up at the ceiling, “ _Fuck me_ ,” he breathes.

He looks back down at the spectacular view on his bed, “Can you wait like 10 more minutes so I can scrub this horrible work day off me?”

“Yes, _Sir_.” Eren can visibly see the wave of heat run through his Dom’s body. He loves it when he can do that to him. Jean turns and strides towards the bathroom, swearing under his breath. The brunette didn’t think he would get this kind of reaction out of Jean, this is so much better than he was expecting. Once the bathroom door closes he gets to work.

Jean tries to shower as fast as he can. Despite having what most consider a desk job, he spent a majority of his day running around in an over-heated server room, sweating his ass off trying to fix whatever the other engineers couldn’t. When he feels he’s clean enough, he dries himself off, and towel dries his hair the best he can so it’s not dripping wet. He grabs the pair of lounge pants he keeps in the bathroom and throws them on. 

Just when he thought the view in the bedroom couldn’t possibly get any better, Eren surprises him yet again. Eren is sitting in the middle of the bed, legs spread wide, bent up at the knee, slightly leaning back on his hands. All of the blankets, except the fitted sheet, are in a pile on the floor. The brunette already set up the bed restraints, thick leather cuffs resting on each corner of the bed. He very clearly knows what he wants tonight. Jean licks at his lips thinking, how the hell did he get this lucky? He approaches the bed, not stopping when he reaches the mattress, and climbs up and between Eren’s latex clad legs. Fingers hook themselves in the ring of the leather collar to pull the brunette closer. Their lips crash together, not wasting a second to deepen the kiss. Bronze arms immediately wrap around pale shoulders, fingers running through the damp hair on the back of the blonde’s head. Jean moves his free hand to brace his arm and eases their two bodies down on the mattress, never breaking the kiss. Eren arches his body up into Jean’s and closes his legs around his waist. Jean can hear the creak of the latex whenever Eren moves under him. The latex on the brunette’s thighs slides easily against his Dom’s still damp skin. Just the feel of it on his skin causes Jean to moan into Eren’s mouth. He’s already really fucking hard and there’s nothing he wants more than to pound Eren hard into the mattress. But this is something he should savor, memorize every moment for later. He’ll take his time. The blonde pulls back from Eren’s deliciously swollen lips and plants light kisses down his jaw. 

“Safe words.” he says it quietly against the warm skin under his lips.

“I want to give them up tonight.”

Jean leans back and stares down at Eren. The brunette has never given up his safe words, even during light play. This is a huge deal. 

“You sure?”

Eren grins filthily up at the boy on top of him and lifts his hips to grind his stiff cock along Jean’s. “Absolutely.”

The blonde hisses through his teeth. He takes the arms around his shoulders by the wrists and pins them above his sub’s head. He smirks down at him.

“Well, it’s obvious you want to be tied up tonight. Anything else you want?”

“Your mouth.”

The smirk on Jean’s face widens. “What else?”

Eren hums in thought. “Surprise me.” 

Jean looks back over his shoulder at his toy chest and then back at Eren with a quirked eyebrow. He’s still has some surprises up his sleeve.

His fingers trail down his sub’s arms, onto his chest, on his sides and over the latex garter belt. He gives the brunette’s waist an appreciative squeeze before trailing a single finger down the straps on either side of his thighs. Light fingers unhook the clasps on the thigh highs and repeat on the straps on the front of the belt. The stockings are tight enough on their own that they won’t slide down Eren’s legs. Jean reaches slightly under the garter belt to pull the satin panties down the brunette’s muscular legs. He climbs off the bed, slipping the panties completely off. 

Jean walks to one of the top corners of the bed and reaches for Eren’s wrist. The cuff is wrapped around his wrist and tightened just the way the brunette likes it. Blue-green eyes watch the blonde as me makes his way around the bed, restraining each of Eren’s limbs. The brunette starts writhing sensually in the sheets, pulling on the restraints, testing to make sure they’ll hold but also to feel the leather edges bite into his skin. This is heaven for him. Jean’s over at the dresser searching for something to play with, and he never disappoints. There’s leather tugging at his wrists and ankles. Latex gripping tight to his body. Eren wasn’t sure of the latex at first, but he really wanted to do this for Jean. It was thinner and tighter than any leather clothes he’d worn before. It felt like a constricting second skin.The longer he wore it though, and felt the tight grip on his legs and waist, the more he liked it. 

The bed springs squeak when Jean crawls back onto the bed. Eren lifts his head to see what his Dom has brought to use on him. He sees a quick flash of silver in his Dom’s hands before he place the items to the side, out of Eren’s view. Amber eyes rake over the body splayed out on the dark sheets. His sub’s chest raises and falls with each steady breath, each subtle movement making the latex creak. Jean reaches for the blindfold he brought over and settles himself on Eren’s waist. He brushes back soft chocolate bangs and places the light blocking blindfold over his sub’s eyes and hitches the strap around his head. The blonde leans forward, placing a light kiss on the hinge of Eren’s jaw.

“Do you know how fucking _delectable_ you look right now?” he whispers hot in his ear. 

“I’m glad you like it, Sir.”

“You going to continue to be this good for me.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Perfect.”

Jean scoots down Eren’s body, sitting on his thighs. He picks up the small, shiny instrument to his side, a steel pinwheel. Imagine an instrument, similar to a pizza cutter, but smaller and instead of a sharp blade as the edge of the wheel, there are tiny, sharp spikes. He has used this on Eren before during past sensation play scenes. It can force the most delicious sounds from the brunette’s throat. And Jean can’t wait to hear them again.

The brunette waits patiently for his Dom to begin. He can’t see a thing. He can only try and decipher what Jean is planning based on his touch and any sound he hears. And the blonde is very good at being quiet and discreet. Eren feels the delicate touch of soft lips at the base of his sternum and they work their way up to the hollow of his throat. Jean’s sharp nose nudges the ring on the collar making it rattle against the metal hook on the collar. The brunette feels cold when his Dom pulls away, taking his warm mouth with him. Just when he’s about to whine in protest, he feels it, tiny claw like scratches going slowly across his pectoral. He gasps at the feeling, muscles tightening in his arms and legs. If Eren could pick his favorites of all of Jean’s little toys, the pinwheel would have to be a close second to the leather riding crop. He doesn’t use it too often but, God, he loves it when Jean does. 

The sensations on the brunette’s body switch from, light kisses, hot, wet licks of his Dom’s tongue and the sharp prickle and scratches of the pinwheel’s spikes. Jean alternates running the wheel over his chest pressing lightly and then harder, pricking the flesh under the wheel. He glides the tool up Eren’s arms, concentrating most on the areas where the skin is most sensitive. Eren writhes and rolls his hips under Jean, moaning from the attention. Even though his cock has been hard and ignored, a bead of precome oozes from the tip. Jean he starts working down his sub’s chest again, along his sides, over his ribs. The brunette feels him lift off his hips and shift lower on the bed. He places light kisses along his inner thigh, followed by a slow hard line of spikes digging into his skin. Eren let’s out a choked cry, biting down hard on his lip to contain some of the noise. 

“I want to hear you,” he says into the skin of his tan thigh and bites down hard releasing a pleasured gasp from Eren’s lips. “That’s better.”

Jean glances up to see the mess he’s making of Eren. His lips are bitten red. Tiny dots and red scratch lines from the pinwheel mark his delicious skin. He’s pulling on the restraints, hands tugging on the straps on the top and toes curling against the straps on the bottom. He glances at Eren’s neglected cock, lying heavy on his stomach, then to the pinwheel in his hand and a wicked smile spreads over his lips. Starting, very lightly and very slowly, from the base of the underside of the brunette’s cock, he runs the pinwheel up the shaft and lifts off just before it reaches the head. Eren sucks in a breath into his lungs and releases a loud moan when Jean’s tongue traces the spikes’ path up his cock. 

“Mmmhmmm, _fuck_.” Eren’s panting. “ _Please fuck me, please_.”

Jean takes the head of Eren’s cock into his mouth and gives it one good suck before letting it fall back onto his stomach. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t hear that.” He damn well heard him, but he wants to hear him say it again. 

“ _Please_ fuck me, Sir.” The brunette can’t stay still, his body is trying to slither away in the sheets.

Jean crawls over his sub’s body and whispers against his lips, “Louder.” 

Eren whines desperately before practically shouting, “ _Fuck me Jea—Sir, please!_ ”

A wicked smirk pulls at the corner of Jean’s lips, “God, I love making you beg.” 

He kisses Eren’s lips then sits back up. The blonde stands up off the bed to remove his pants and toss them into the pile of discarded things on the floor. As he moves back between Eren’s legs, he grabs for the lube and covers his fingers and pours a little drop into his other hand to stroke his sub’s cock. He languidly tugs on the brunette’s length and circles his fingers around his entrance. When the first finger pushes through the ring of muscle, the other hand squeezes around the head of Eren’s cock. The brunette groans, rocking his hips on Jean’s finger and thrusting upward into his fist. A second finger slides in along the first, stretching the hole wider. 

Eren makes a small noise every time the fingers thrust in. His ankles pull at the restraints. He wants to spread his legs wider to get those fingers deeper, but at the same time, he wants to enclose his legs around Jean’s waist so he can feel the seductive roll of his hips when his cock is finally inside him. No matter how much he writhes though, the restraints stay strong. Why does Jean have to buy all the good quality toys?

Jean can see Eren start to get impatient by the time the third finger goes in. He continues at his steady pace with his fingers and hand, slowly driving Eren to an incoherent mess. The brunette screams when his fingers rub insistently on his sweet spot, pleading gibberish wishes. His Dom has mercy on him and removes his hands, wiping excess lube on the sheets. The blonde grabs for the condom and rolls it on his weeping cock. He slicks it up with more lube and lines up to Eren’s stretched out hole. Eren feels a firm grip on his hip and a reassuring squeeze, Jean’s nonverbal request for permission. 

He moans, “Fuck, _yes_ ,” when he feels the head of Jean’s cock start to slide in. 

Eren is slowly losing it. All his thoughts are a hazy mess in the back of his mind. The only thing he can focus on is his sense of touch. Every nerve ending tingles with pleasure, aware of everything touching his body. The strap of the blindfold around his head. The soft Egyptian cotton sheet he’s been writhing in. The leather collar he can feel every time his Adam’s apple bobs when he swallows. The leather cuffs on each of his wrists and ankles holding on to him just as tight as he’s holding on to them. The latex feels like a second layer of skin he can’t imagine not having. Then there’s Jean’s cock, filling him up and ripping him apart. The pads on his thumbs soothing circles over latex covered hips. When Jean is in to the hilt, Eren feels whole. He realizes that thought sounds like some trashy, romance novel bullshit but there is no other way to describe what he’s feeling. All he wants right now, is for Jean to fucking move. 

It’s easy to see now that Eren is beyond coherent words, lost in his headspace. His body acts on it’s own accord, hips lifting trying to grind down on the cock buried deep in his ass. Jean watches for a moment completely transfixed on the erotic movements of the body before him. He tightens his grip on Eren’s hips and shifts so his thighs lift up his sub’s lower body into his lap. He starts a torturing slow pace, pulling out halfway and sliding back in. Eren’s arms tense up, he’s bracing for more, but his Dom won’t give that to him yet. This continues for another minute until Jean removes one of his hands from Eren’s hip and picks up the pinwheel again. In one fast motion, he runs the wheel diagonally across the brunette’s chest. He moans loudly, arching his back in a lewd manner. Jean repeats the motion in the opposite direction. Eren’s whole body jolts from the sensation, hips driving down on Jean’s cock causing it to hit the sweet bundle of nerves. Eren’s cry is so loud Jean thinks he might get another complaint from his neighbors. Oh well! He pulls his hips back further and slams his cock back in deep. The new pace has Eren throwing his head back in a silent scream. He’s already so close, the coil in his gut winding tighter and tighter. Jean is falling apart right along side him. Between the sight of his body, the sounds coming from Eren’s throat and the heat gripped around his cock, he not going to last that much longer. 

Eren’s release rips through him. A firm fist around his cock helps him ride it out, milking every drop of cum he has to offer. Jean follows him into bliss just a few erratic thrusts later. 

The blonde collapses on top of Eren’s chest, his ear pressed over his heart listening to the excited heartbeat. He gives himself one more minute before he pushes himself up with jell-o arms and slides his softening cock out of Eren. The brunette tries to shift his body only to find his limbs are still tied to the bed. He’s already starting to come out of his headspace on his own.

“Hold on one second.” Eren hums to acknowledge that he heard him. 

Jean turns behind him to undo the cuffs on the brunette’s ankles and then leans over him to release his wrists. The blonde looks down at the blindfold, surprisingly still in place on Eren’s eyes. When the blindfold is pulled off, Eren cups the sides of Jean’s face and pulls him closer to crash their lips together. The kiss is hungry and passionate. A thank you for an delicious scene and so much more. The brunette breaks the kiss and falls back on the bed trying to catch his breath. 

“You’re amazing, you know that?” He gives Jean one of his breathtaking smiles and the blonde can only sit there feeling slightly dumbfounded. Seriously, how the hell did he get this lucky.

He nods his chin towards Eren. “Right back at ya.” He slides off the bed and pats the side of the brunette’s legs. “I’ll be back to help you take these off.”

Jean heads to the bathroom to throw out the condom and to start a warm bubble bath. Yeah, it sounds a little cheesy but after some sensation play, a warm bath feels so good. The blonde checks the temperature before putting down the drain cap and walks back into his bedroom while the tub fills up. 

Eren had scooted to the end of the bed, still lying on his back, from the knees down hanging off. Jean stands between his legs and starts pulling on the cord holding the garter belt together. The brunette props himself up on his elbows to watch Jean’s hands work. Finally, after the cord is pulled through the last grommet, Eren sighs in relief. The blonde then kneels between Eren’s legs to start working on the latex thigh highs. Eren fully sits up now and cards his fingers through the longer hair on top of Jean’s head.

“Don’t be getting any ideas,” he laughs.

The brunette feigns innocence, “I don’t know what you’re talking about, I’m just touching your hair.” 

Jean snorts and looks up at him through his bangs. Eren pulls back his hand when Jean starts to tug at the stockings.

“Those were such a bitch to put on.”

The blonde laughs, “Was it worth it?”

“If I had known what these did to you, I would have done this a long time ago.”

Once the stockings are removed he helps Eren stand up and they make their way to the bathroom. The tub is filled by the time they walk in. Jean stands behind the brunette to take off the collar and places a light kiss on the nape of his neck. Eren carefully steps into the tub and sits in the bubbles. He submerges under the foam to soak his hair. As he comes back up, he pushes his bangs back only to have them fall back over his face. Eren’s been avoiding getting a hair cut the past few weeks. He likes it when Jean actually has something to grip and hold on to. 

The blonde joins him in the tub, sitting on the opposite end by his feet. He takes one of Eren’s feet in his hands and starts massaging up his leg. Eren leans his head back against the tub and sinks further into the water until his chin is touching the surface. Jean spoils him rotten with his after care and he loves every second of it. As the blonde starts on the other leg, Eren finds his knees under the water and begins rubbing circles on the inside of his joint. Jean glances up at Eren, who only smiles at him and continues his circles. When Jean finishes the massage, Eren moves to sit between his legs, back to chest and leans his head back on his shoulder. Pale arms wrap around him and soft lips press a kiss to his temple.

Jean whispers into his hair, “I’m falling pretty hard for you.”

The brunette intertwines his fingers around Jean’s, “Me too.”

They let the silence take over after that, no need to say anything else. Until, Jean’s stomach ruins the moment by letting out a ferocious growl (he hadn’t eaten in almost 8 hours). Eren cackles loudly and flicks water at the man behind him. They get out of the tub and dress in comfy clothes. Eren has Jean put his collar back on, there are some days where he feels naked if he doesn’t wear it. And Jean is more than happy to watch Eren parade around the apartment in it. The brunette lounges on the couch in the living room, while Jean orders two pizzas cause he swears he can eat a whole one all by himself he’s so hungry. 

The rest of the night is spent in front of the TV stuffing their faces with pizza. Jean looks over at Eren who’s completely engrossed in whatever their watching to notice the blonde’s staring. He begins to think that he could make it through any horrible day at work, if he has Eren to come home to every time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those who like visuals (NSFW):  
> garter belt ref: [here](http://thumbs1.ebaystatic.com/d/l225/m/mxcSwdJqASI_SPw9CmWvGXA.jpg)  
> pinwheel:[here](http://leather-horizon.com/online/images/LZI-MEDT12_single%20pinwheel.jpg)
> 
> Couple of things I want to address: 
> 
> -First, I did research initially into what collars mean in the BDSM world. They have so many meanings and imply different things to different people. I didn't really want to get into that in the story because it sounds too textbook. If you're super interested in them, look them up. It's actually a really fascinating read. 
> 
> -Second, giving up safe words during a scene is in fact A HUGE DEAL between partners. Giving up safe words means that the submissive will not use their safe words AT ALL during the scene. The submissive is trusting the dominant completely to push their limits but not extend past them. The dominant needs to be super attentive to the submissive during this time, reading their body language and knowing when to stop when things get too intense. There needs to be a huge amount of trust between partners in order to this. Again, I didn't want to talk too in depth about this in the middle of a smut scene without sounding like a textbook.
> 
> -Third, the "I'm falling pretty hard for you" line I kinda want to talk about. Here's the thing, I personally don't believe in jumping from "like" to "love". There's got to be something in between. Remember in chapter 7, I mention Jean having a "crush" on Eren. I'm building up from there. They've only been dating for 4 months, which to me, is still a short amount of time to go from a simple crush on someone to loving someone, even with having a friendship beforehand. So "falling for" someone is the in-between like and love. I'm sorry if you feel like their relationship is too slow, it kinda bugs me when characters all of the sudden realize they are in love when usually in real life it takes time. I'm not saying it can't happen suddenly, I've just never witnessed it. I could probably write a whole essay on my feelings on this but I'll leave it at that.
> 
>  
> 
> ANYWAY!  
> Next time you're getting a little back story. Just how did Hanji do it? (Just a little heads up, no smut. Sorry!)


	12. March, Year Zero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A glimpse at the VERY beginning. Hanji the BDSM guru and match maker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHOA!! Double update in one weekend!!
> 
> I was really excited to write this chapter. It probably has some information that I've mentioned before but I wanted to give more background on the characters because I think it helps build their future story and possibly explain past chapters. Plus I love Hanji and I wanted to write more of them. 
> 
> Just a few notes. 
> 
> \- I don't think I specified this before but I'm choosing to differentiate male and female dominants by using Dom for male and Domme for female. As far as I know they are pronounced the same.
> 
> \- A switch is someone who likes to play the role of the Dominant or the submissive.
> 
> \- I have no clue how BDSM clubs are actually run so just go along with me ok? :P
> 
> \- I'm going to start referring to the first year Jean and Eren are together as "Year Zero". I'm going to start writing scenes that take place after the one year mark and I didn't want to confuse people by labeling chapters with the same month. So "Year Zero" for when they are first starting out, "Year One" starts at the next April scene, where they've been together in a BDSM relationship for a year. How exciting! :D
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter!

**-Jean-**

Wall Sina. It’s one of a few BDSM clubs in the area and possibly the best club in a 50 mile radius. The main reason for its allure is the fact that it is first and foremost a social club, not a bass-thumping-sweaty-dance-floor club. It is decked out in rich, dark colors, real stained wood accents, and suede and leather furniture. On the main floor, there are booths lined along the walls with curtains for added privacy if the people sitting in them need it. Couches and chaise lounge chairs fill the space in the middle for those in the mood to be more social. On one side is a simple looking bar, but it expands the length of the 30 foot wall. In the basement (below the main room) there is a stage for shows and lessons with small cocktail tables scattered throughout the space and a small bar in the back corner. The second floor (above the main room) is separated out into private rooms. Each room can be rented out by a Dominant either for the night or several and submissives can schedule an appointment with them if both parties agree. Rooms are sound proof so as to not disturb the mingling downstairs. There is a larger room for those interested in exhibitionism/voyeurism, too. 

There are two reasons Jean would go to this club. One, for the basement shows. They’re entertaining and educational. Reason two, Hanji, one of the clubs bartenders. He had met them when he was new to the scene. After researching online to find BDSM clubs near his college, he decided to give Wall Sina a try and he never regretted it. Hanji had been working that night and they have a keen sense of whenever there’s new blood in the club and immediately pounced on Jean. He came to find out that the bartender was like an informal leader in the BDSM community. They try to make a point of knowing, or at least meeting, everyone. Hanji had been working an afternoon shift so they got off around 9pm but stuck around to talk with Jean. They filled him in on how the scene in the area worked. Explained the different bands people in the club were wearing. They asked him what he was looking for. He replied that he would like to be a Dom but he realized that he would probably have to be a sub first to learn. Besides knowing a lot of people, Hanji was also really good at pairing/grouping people up. One of their many talents, they said. Jean really liked them. They were honest and super helpful. So he kept going back to Sina just to talk to Hanji.

Over the course of several visits to the club, Jean learned a lot about himself and his wants, but he also gained a friend in the community. He would sit at the bar and talk with Hanji, and even some other club goers, about the scene. Everyone was really open, happy to welcome a newcomer into their circle. Hanji still kept him under their wing. It wasn’t a one sided friendship though. Jean learned just as much about Hanji as they did about Jean. They have been in the scene for over 10 years and has had the same partner for almost 6 of those years, a guy name Moblit. He learned that Hanji is a switch, so they will swap roles with their partner regularly. They went to school for psychology because they love to learn what makes people tick. Jean had asked them at one point why they never became a psychologist or psychiatrist. They simply said a bartender is practically the same thing. People come in all the time and talk about their problems or just about their day in general and Hanji listens. Plus, those in the BDSM tend to be more interesting subjects. And the fact that they focused on sexual psychology and wrote their thesis on it, a bartender in a BDSM club was the perfect job for them. 

For the first few months visiting the club, he rarely talked to other patrons unless they sat near him at the bar while he chatted with Hanji. On busy nights where Hanji couldn’t really talk, he stayed quiet and people watched. Some people did come over to him to talk or make him an offer. He’d turn them down politely, saying he was new and just feeling out the scene. A majority of the time, they’d smile and welcome him and offer any advice if he needed it. There were a few who scoffed at him and just walked away, and by a few, it was really one person but Jean likes to exaggerate the story sometimes. Hanji had told him one of the best ways to learn what he might like would be to watch the basement shows. If he saw something he liked, they told him to keep it in the back of his mind of things he might like to try. So that’s what he did. Every Thursday night he would go watch the basement show and then go home to add to the written list of things he liked and didn’t like. By the end of the third month, he had a very long and thorough list. Jean met up with Hanji at Sina after one of their shifts to go over what Jean discovered. They had offered to help Jean find his first Dominant, someone who would satisfy his needs as a sub but also would be willing to teach him to be a Dom. Jean expressed a great interest in bondage and restraints, specifically rope bondage. There were not a lot of people in the area who were highly skilled with rope but Hanji said they would do their best to find someone for Jean. All they needed was a week. That was it. One week and Hanji introduced Jean to his first Domme. From then on, Jean never doubted Hanji’s match making abilities.

\- - First weekend of March - - 

It was the end of the work week. Nothing spectacular or horrible happened, it was just a boring, long work week. For once, Jean was itching to get out of his apartment but he wasn’t in the mood for the company of his friends. So, he found himself at Wall Sina. He hasn’t been here in a while. Six months to be exact. His last D/s relationship ended five months ago and he is getting antsy again. It’s not the longest period of time he’s gone without a regular sub but still, it’s been a while. There were a few one night arrangements but none of them satisfied him. Plus he never has sex during those one night flings and he does actually want to get laid. He found most of those subs at other clubs on his own and none of them did it for him. In the past, if he liked them enough he would make a contract of sorts. Really it was just an agreement to start a relationship and give it an end date. He never went over a month. Jean was getting bored though and he needed to find someone good for a change. That’s why he’s here. He needs Hanji.

The blonde greets the bouncer at the door, receives his wristbands and a black X on the back of his hand. He wears two bands, black and yellow. The club keeps a really simple wristband code. Black, white and gray to signify dominant, submissive and switch, respectively. Paired with the role band is the availability band. Red, green or yellow for taken, available or just here to socialize. The owners of the club didn’t want to make the code too complicated that people would forget what each color or pattern meant. Plus they wanted there to be socializing in their social club. They wanted patrons to talk to each other to find out what people were interested in. It helped create a close community but also a network. Two people could talk to each other, find out they are not interested in the same things, but then could recommend each other to fellow members who are interested in those things. It was kind of a brilliant idea. When people got a black X on the back of their hand, like Jean did tonight, that means they plan on drinking and are not safe to play. 

When Jean sits at the bar, Hanji immediately spots him and bounces over.

“Haven’t seen you here in a while. How’s it going stranger?” They take out a glass and poor Jean his regular beer. 

The blonde smiles. He’s missed them. “Hey Hanji. Just here to unwind after a super boring week.”

They give him a knowing look. “You looking for someone new?”

“You could say that.” 

They’ve helped him pick subs in the past. The subs were great suggestions but, again, always had an end date. Hanji promised to one day find his perfect match. They believe everyone has one, or two, and they want Jean to at least experience one.

“No luck trying to find someone on your own huh?” Hanji gives him a cheeky smile.

“Ha! Not even close. I’m starting to believe the person I’m looking for doesn’t actually exist.”

“Remind me, what _exactly_ are you looking for?” 

Jean opens his mouth to start on a rant but another customer comes up to the bar and Hanji holds up a finger to tell him to hold his thought. All Jean wants is a challenge. He’s getting tired of all the overly complacent subs. He doesn’t always want a “yes, sir”, “anything to please you, sir”. The blonde wasn’t really a fan of subs who looked or acted fragile, it was a turn off. He didn’t like feeling he was preying on the weak, even if it was consensual and what the sub wanted. All he heard in the back of his head was the childhood playground motto of “pick on someone your own size.” He wants someone who will talk smack, antagonize him, get his blood going. He wants someone strong who could over power him if they wanted to, but he doesn’t actually want them to. He wants someone he can throw around and be rough with but also take it slow and explore the more sensual side of BDSM that most people forget about. He doesn’t care if it’s a guy or a girl, he’s bisexual. There are times in the past where he’s been picky and specifically looked for a guy or girl. It just depended on whether or not he felt like sucking on a cock. And right now he didn’t care what he put in his mouth. 

He tells Hanji all of this when they come back over. As he speaks he can see the gears turning in their head. Hanji knows most, if not all, of Jean’s preferences and specialities, after all, they picked the Domme who trained him. 

“So what do you think? Can you help me out?” He pushes out his bottom lip in a mock pout, “Please?”

Hanji laughs loudly, holding their stomach as they cackle behind the bar. “I’ll see what I can do. A couple names have already popped up in my head but I’m determined this time. I will find your perfect match and you’ll never have to make that sad little pout face again.”

Jean laughs into his glass, “Thanks Hanji.”

Jean orders one more drink before he heads out. He stops to talk to a couple of familiar faces but he leaves alone and he’s ok with that. Hanji has always looked out for him and he trusts their judgement, so he’ll wait to see if they find someone for him.

**-Eren-**

Eren had met Hanji through Mikasa’s cousin, Levi. Eren and Mikasa were neighbors growing up. Sometimes when Levi came over to visit Mikasa’s family he brought along his best friend, Hanji. They were the epitome of opposites attract but their friendship just made sense in some weird way. They were older than Mikasa and Eren by 10 years, so they never really played or hung out together, but they knew of each other. As they got older, they socialized on the rare occasion they all were in the same place. 

Eren and Hanji got along really well, ever since they met when Eren was 9 and Hanji was 18 going on 19. It wasn’t until Eren started college that he considered Hanji a close friend rather than a friend/acquaintance. 

A friend of the Jaeger family, Hannes, owned a martial arts gym near Eren’s college. He and Mikasa got jobs there helping out at the gym in their down time and even being assistants for some classes. Eren was going to school for physical education with a minor in business. It was his dream to teach martial arts and one day own his own studio. So this was the perfect job for him. As it turned out, Levi was one of the trainers at the gym. It was his side job, so he was only there on the weekends. Hanji would always hang around to watch Levi’s classes and to talk with Eren. There was one day though, that a guy came in looking for Hanji. What struck Eren about this guy was the chain and lock collar he wore around his neck. He was aware of BDSM but he never met anyone who was into it. The next time he saw Hanji he bluntly asked them about it. No sense in beating around the bush, Hanji was very open about themselves. And now that Eren was older, not so much a young kid anymore, they told him about the local community in the area. They gave him a list of clubs to check out and offered to help with anything to get started. 

Despite his connection with Hanji and knowing how much they know about the community, he wanted to experience it himself first. He checked out some clubs, but avoided Wall Sina. He knew of its reputation of being the best but he wasn’t ready for the pure social aspect of this community yet. He needed the buffer of loud music and a dance floor. Even if he didn’t find a partner, he at least got to grind up on somebody to lighten some of his sexual frustrations. Plus he was still in school, he didn’t want start something while classes were still going on. In his outings he met Petra, who he discovered was a friend of Hanji and Levi. She kind of gave him the ins and outs of how things work but stressed that Hanji is the best person to ask about all this stuff. Eren gave in eventually. Any time Hanji stopped by the gym they would talk a little bit about BDSM stuff. They couldn’t talk too explicitly since sometimes there were kids in the studio. They gave him good advice on how to find someone, what questions to ask and what to avoid. That’s really the extent that Eren used Hanji. He did find out along the line that Hanji was good at partnering people but he wanted to find someone on his own to see if he could.

A few people had approached him the clubs thinking he was a Dom, probably because of his build and the way he held himself, but he wasn’t interested in control. Eren was pretty sure he was a submissive. Because of his martial arts knowledge and abilities he was pretty much a walking weapon. He knew how to control his body and knew enough about the body in general, to take another person down. He wanted to be able to relinquish that control and just get lost in the experience, he didn’t want to have to think. The first Dom he found was pretty good. He walked Eren through some basic scenes to get a sense of what it was like and gradually made each scene more intense. Eren really liked him as a Dom but, unfortunately, this Dom liked a refresh after a month or two. Thankfully before he and Eren went their separate ways he recommended another Dom for him. The second Dom wasn’t bad. Eren would say he was on par with his first, except he didn’t give a recommendation when they were over. So it was back to the drawing board for Eren. And being the stubborn person he was, he was still determined to find his Doms on his own.

\- - End of March, just after Eren’s birthday - - 

The morning kids’ class was just about over when Eren sees Levi and Hanji walk in the gym. Eren gives them a a quick wave and focuses back on his class to do the wind down stretches. He loves teaching kids. Probably because he has just as much energy and excitement of martial arts as they do. Hanji walks over after he dismisses the class, giving a few kids a high five as they walked passed them. The kids recognize them from the times they come to visit the gym, which is rather often.

“Eren!” Hanji pulls the boy into a tight hug, locking his arms down by his sides. “Happy belated birthday kid.”

Eren tries to reach to give Hanji a pat on the back, “Thanks Hanji.”

“So how’s it feel to be a quarter of a century old? Find any gray hairs yet?”

“Noo. It feels pretty much the same as turning 24 did, uneventful.” He shrugs but keeps a smile on his face.

“Aww, no big birthday surprises?” 

Eren knows Hanji isn’t talking about someone jumping out of cake or surprise birthday party. Over the years they’ve learned to talk about BDSM topics in an almost code-like manner when they are at the gym.

The boy shakes his head to answer their question. “Haven’t had a Dom in almost 4 months. And the last one was awful. I gave him the benefit of the doubt and tried three scenes but it just wasn’t working.”

Hanji rocks back and forth on their heels, an excited smile slowly making its way across their face. “Sooo. You’re looking for a new Dom then?”

They are well aware of Eren’s feelings of not wanting to “abuse” their friendship by using them to find a Dom, but Hanji genuinely wants to help him. They want him to have a a great experience, not mediocre, that’s no fun.

“I guess, yeah.” Eren sighs. “I don’t know, it’s been hard trying to find someone. I try to talk to guys in clubs but they all seem to be about the physical game. Not so much the mental game. No one seems to get what I’m after. I’m not 100% sure I know what I’m after at this point.” 

Hanji stands there silently, waiting for Eren to just admit defeat and ask them already.

He finally cracks under their stare. “Think you could help me out? Use your super _magical_ matchmaker abilities.” He fans out and wiggles his fingers to emphasize the word magical.

“Why of course I will.” They wrap their arm around his shoulders and start leading him to the trainers’ break room. “But you have to tell me everything you want first.”

Both of them sit in the break room for about 45 minutes. It took a few minutes for Eren to be comfortable to spill everything to Hanji. He has never gone this in depth talking about what he likes with them before, but after a while, he found it pretty easy. He explained how he was getting bored with just being smacked around with a paddle and being denied his orgasm. For whatever reason he always found the Dom that liked to do that. He’s not in it solely to get pleasure from pain, although he does enjoy that aspect. He wants more out of the scene than just a few scratches and bruises. 

Eren got pretty specific about the kind of Dom he wants. First, he wants someone who isn’t intimidated by his profession. It turns some people off knowing he can probably kill someone with his pinky. He doesn’t need someone to be dressed up in a leather studded outfit that screamed Dominant. He wants someone who was confident enough in themselves to just let their presence alone give off the aura of a Dom. He wants an experienced Dom who he can try new things with. The Dom has to be able to talk dirty too. He discovered in past vanilla sexual encounters that just saying filthy things in his ear gets him off a whole lot more. Having a Dom call him a bad boy, over and over, just won’t cut it. Eren also explained his biting kink. It goes both ways, he likes to bite and be bitten, so that would be an added bonus if the Dom is into that. 

Eren sat there quietly for a moment, tapping his chin with his finger trying to think of more to say. As soon as the boy started talking, bells were going off in Hanji’s head. All his preferences so far have fit a very particular want list that they had stored in the back of their mind. They lean forward, placing their elbows on the table. The fluorescent lights overhead shine over their glasses.

“How do you feel about being tied up?”

Eren looks up at Hanji, “Oh, um…I love it actually.”

“Do you ever talk back to your Doms? Talk smack kind of thing?”

“I have before but none of them really liked it. I was gagged a few times for it.”

A manic smile breaks across Hanji’s face. For a moment, Eren’s actually scared.

“I just so happened to have chatted recently with a Dom who’s looking for someone like you.” 

Eren’s eyes widen and eyebrows shoot up, shocked. This really can’t that easy, he thinks. “Really?”

Hanji starts vibrating with excitement, “Mhmm. Want me to put some feelers out and see if he’d be willing to take ya?” Eren just stares still not believing that this is real. “Past subs I’ve hooked him up with said he was _good. VERY good_. Especially with that mouth of his.”

A blush creeps over Eren’s cheeks and the tips of his ears. “Uhh, yeah, sure.” Hanji lets out a giddy laugh. “Thank you.”

“Anytime!” They look down at their watch and sulk in their seat. “I have to go, got work in about an hour. I’ll talk to the guy and let you know as soon as possible ok?”

“O-ok.” 

Hanji hugs Eren goodbye and skips out of the break room. Eren sits there amazed at what just happened. 

\- - Later that night during Hanji’s break - - 

Jean was just finishing up some last minute code fixes for work the next day when his phone rings. He checks the caller ID and sees that it’s Hanji. He hits the accept button and brings the phone up to his ear. He doesn’t even get a chance to say hello before…

“I think I’ve found your perfect match! Like seriously, _PER-FECT!_ ”

“That was a lot faster than I expected. Damn, you work fast.”

“Actually this candidate kind of sprung out of nowhere. I wasn’t considering him until I talked to him today. He’s got a personality of a switch but he’s a submissive. It is a guy by the way. I know you go for both guys and girls but just want to make sure you’re ok with it.”

Jean laughs, “Guys are definitely fine. I kind of like them better than girls anyway. Just don’t tell the girls I said that.”

Hanji cackles away from the phone. “Oh my god, you guys will be so perfect! So you interested? You want to meet him?”

“If he’s as perfect as you say he is, then hell yeah.”

They let out a loud ecstatic squeal on the other end. Jean has to pull the phone away from his ear. “OK! I’m going to set you guys up on a blind meet up, that cool? Talk over lunch or something?”

“Sounds good to me.”

“Awesome! How does this weekend sound, the 4th?”

“I’m actually celebrating my birthday early that weekend. The week after?”

“Done! I’ll talk to him and see if that works.”

After they hang up with Jean, Hanji’s break is just about over so they don’t have time to actually call Eren. So they send him a text.

**H:** Remember the Dom I mentioned. HE’S INTERESTED!!  
**H:** Want to do a blind meet up?  
**H:** Not this weekend but the next, the 11th?  
**E:** SERIOUSLY!?!  
**E:** You’re amazing! Yes, def interested!  
**H:** Great! I’ll send you the details when I pick a place :)

\- - - The next afternoon - - -

**H:** Saturday, April 11th at Trost Gate Cafe, 1pm  
**H:** Have fun!! ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time: Jean wants to show Eren something new. (smut smut smut)


	13. Early March, Year One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean wants Eren to try a new thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the super late update!!! The past two weeks have been weird so I was only getting like an hour or less a night to try and write this. It was one of those times where I could see the scene perfectly in my head but then I would try to write it down and the words came slowly. But I finally got a lot of free time today to wrap up this chapter.
> 
> For now I'm leaving a super rough edit so please excuse any mistakes, I'll look through it tomorrow night and fix stuff.
> 
> And, if you'll notice, we've made it to Year One of their story! Woohoo!
> 
> \- - -
> 
> Visual reference: **NSFW!!!** There's a dick...just FYI. I wanted to find a good reference to show that was actually a guy and not a girl, and it was really difficult. So here's a pic of the harness I mention in this chapter (minus the ropes around his legs). It's called a karada/rope harness/rope dress. There are many variations to this type of harness, so when you google karada you'll see a lot of different designs. They're really pretty.
> 
> karada harness (NSFW): [here](http://40.media.tumblr.com/99e5256f26c64a9f9a5a1a5921da476b/tumblr_n3cyj2AETU1rkie37o1_1280.jpg)

There’s been something Jean’s been wanting to try with Eren for a while now. It’s something he loves doing but it was rare he’d ever do it with past subs. He either never felt comfortable enough with them or it just wasn’t their cup of tea. Most often the latter reason. He’s pretty sure Eren has not done it before, so it would be new for him and he loves doing new things. Jean’s not sure what’s been stopping him from asking Eren to try it. He supposes it’s the fear that Eren will not be interested in it at all but then part of him says that Eren would probably love it as much as he does. 

Jean has been sitting on the couch debating with himself for the past half hour staring at nothing. Eren is at his Saturday morning class, so Jean has the apartment to himself for the time being. Eren dropped his car off at the shop to get some work done so Jean has to pick him up in about an hour. He’s trying to figure out how to word asking Eren but he’s finding that words are not conveying the idea right. The blonde’s eyes focus on the door to his computer room, slightly ajar. 

“Fuck it.” He stands from the couch and stalks to the closet in the computer room. The door slides open noisily from lack of use and there it is. Jean stares at it, eyeing it up and down, his body getting a little hot at just the thought of using it, especially with Eren. 

If words aren’t going to work for him, he’s going to have to show him.

\- - - 

Jean leans against the front desk of the gym watching Eren train two fighters in the cage. The students can’t be any older than 15 or 16 and they stand there listening to every word that their teacher says. Eren has the two boys go through the motions slowly, telling one to turn his wrist slightly, the other to squat lower, don’t forget to use those core muscles. When the brunette steps back, the two fighters go through the same steps at full speed with one ending up on the ground with a loud slam and rattle of the cage walls. Eren has them do it again, but swap places. 

The bells on the door ring when one of the student’s parents walk in. Eren looks over at the sound of the noise then over at the clock. Class is just about over. He calls to his students to start their wind down stretches and he makes his way over to the parents that are waiting. He chats with them while the kids gather their things and then make their way to their parents. As they filter out of the gym Eren follows to lock the door behind the last of them. 

Eren walks past Jean towards the trainer’s locker room. “I’m just gonna grab a quick shower then we can go?” He turns to the blonde, walking backwards towards the room

“That’s fine.”

The brunette slows his steps, “Wanna join me?” He sends Jean a playful wink.

“It wouldn’t be a very quick if I joined you,” Jean smirks. “Plus I already have something set up at home.” 

Eren grins, “Fine. I’ll be out in a few minutes.” 

The brunette disappears behind the locker room door and Jean roams around the gym. He remembers coming here a few times when he and Eren finally got on friendly terms in high school. Eren had shown him a few moves but they didn’t really stick. Jean was still knocked on his ass every time he and Eren fought for fun. 

As Jean makes his way towards the back of the gym he notices a board of pictures. Some look as old as maybe the mid-80s up to present day. There are a lot from when Eren was younger, Mikasa too. They’re holding medals in one, throwing someone on the ground in the other, or goofing off in the gym. Jean forgets how amazing Eren was at fighting when he actually tried. He could have gone on to be a pro but he opted to teach instead. That’s not to say he doesn’t enter competitions when they are in the area. He’ll enter most of them and come out in the top spot. Jean and the rest of their friends would buy out a whole row in the arena and be Eren’s cheer section.

“Jean?” 

“Yeah, coming.” The blonde walks back to the front of the gym where Eren is waiting.

He tilts his head towards the door, “Let’s go.”

 

\- - -

They are about 5 minutes away from the apartment when Jean finally decides to clue Eren in on his plan.

“Soo, I have a proposition for you.” He glances quickly at Eren when he feels that green gaze on him.

“Oh yeah?” The blonde doesn’t even need to look at him to know he’s wearing that snarky smile of his.

“I thought of a different scene idea we could do today, if you’re open to it.”

“What’s your idea?”

A smile tugs on the corner of the blonde’s mouth, “You’re gonna have to wait till I show you.”

“But—“

“After I show you then you can decide.”

Eren pouts and pretends to sulk in the passenger seat. “You and your surprises.”

“You complaining?” the blonde laughs.

“God no. I like the anticipation.” 

“Says the most impatient person I know.”

“Shut up,” he smacks Jean’s arm that’s connected to the gear shift. 

It’s quiet for the remaining of the ride. Jean’s trying to prepare for the surprise in the bedroom and Eren’s pondering what the surprise could possibly be. 

Soon, Jean is parking in front of the apartment and following Eren up to the front door. The brunette drops off his gym bag in the laundry room and Jean waits for him in the living room. He’s about to ask if he wants to eat lunch first but the look in Eren’s eyes says he’s not interested in food right now. That heated gaze has been making Jean seriously consider trying role reversal with Eren. Plus the brunette tops most of the time they aren’t having a scene and Jean gets a thrill being under him at the mercy of Eren’s hips. 

Jean leads Eren down the hallway to the bedroom. When they reach the closed door the blonde turns to face Eren. He pulls a blindfold out of his pocket and holds it out to the brunette.

“Put this on.” The look on Eren’s face says he’s skeptical. Jean wants to roll his eyes but instead just sighs, “It’s not part of the scene I just want the reveal to be more dramatic.”

The brunette plucks the blindfold from Jean’s hand and puts it over his eyes and secures the strap behind his head. Once it’s on, Jean opens the door and moves to stand behind Eren to guide him in. 

He puts his hands on top of Eren’s shoulders, “Don’t worry I won’t let you trip over anything,” he coos.

“You say that, but it’s not very reassuring when there’s a sarcastic undertone to it.”

The blonde smiles slightly, “Just start walking Eren.” 

He does as he is told and walks through the doorway. Jean leaves the door open behind him, the signal that the scene has not started yet. The scene starts when the door is closed. The room is lit by the light filtering in through blinds on the windows and the single lamp on top of the toy dresser. It’s considerably a lot brighter than how they usually have the room during their scenes but, this works better for the new idea.

Jean walks Eren across the room, over to the side of the bed.

“Sit on top of the bed, in the middle. It’s right in front of you.”

Eren puts his arms out to feel for the top of the mattress and climbs up. He crawls to the center and then sits on his calves.

“Now face the end of the bed.”

He leans forward to adjust his legs underneath him so he faces the right direction. 

Here goes nothing. “You can take off the blindfold now.”

Eren reaches for the strap on the back of his head and pulls off the blindfold, blinking to adjust to the brighter light.

Set up at the foot of the bed, is a tall and wide trifold mirror. It stands almost 6ft tall. The middle mirror is close to 4ft wide with 2ft wide wings. It seems a little old, the edges have a few dark spots where the mirror has tarnished. The panes sit in a stained dark wood frame with decorative filigree carved along the top. It’s actually a rather beautiful piece of furniture.

While the brunette is taking in the mirror, Jean sidles up behind him, placing his chin over Eren’s shoulder.

“Have you ever been watched before?” His voice has a low, sultry tone to it, similar to the one he uses as a Dom trying to seduce Eren.

“No.” Eren pauses. “At least, not that I know of.”

“Have you ever watched yourself?” Jean sees the brunette shake his head no and a wide smirk spreads across his face. “Would you want to?”

His fingers tease the brunette’s skin under the hem of his shirt and Eren leans back, pressing against the warmth of Jean’s body. Their eyes hold on each other and Eren bites his lip while he contemplates Jean’s offer.

“If I say yes, what would we do?”

“Mmmmm…thought of doing that karada harness you like. Then maybe have you put on a little show for me, see where that leads.”

When he first saw it, just the thought of sex in front of the mirror got Eren’s blood hot. But the thought of Jean having something more in mind other than them just going at it has his blood boiling. Can’t say he’s ever thought of it before, but it doesn’t surprise him that it’s something Jean wants to do. 

“So what do you say?” The blonde speaks close to his ear, sending a chill down his body.

“I think I’m up for it.” 

The blonde’s only response is a sly, slightly victorious, smirk.

In a sense, Jean is a bit of a voyeur. He likes to watch other people but he also likes to watch himself with other people, hence the mirror. It’s different from making a sex tape and watching it later. With the mirror, it’s a more immersive experience. Everything is happening live right in front of you and utilizes all senses. Seeing their reflections in the mirror. Hearing the sounds they make. Feeling the warm body against him, sliding his fingers over slick skin. Smell of sex combined with whatever they felt like using; leather, rope, latex. The taste of the skin and sweat under his lips and running his tongue over marks his teeth left. You can’t get that from a sex tape. You’d have to recreate every sense from memory and that’s not as much fun.

He gets off on his partner getting off on themselves. In the past he’s had the best reactions with his subs when it was their first time watching themselves in the mirror. And with this being Eren’s first time watching, Jean’s really looking forward to starting. 

“You have any more questions before we start?”

“How do you want me?” his gaze burns right through Jean.

“In your usual spot. Clothes off.” 

They both scoot off the bed, Eren going to stand in the middle of the room, stripping off his clothes, while Jean closes the bedroom door then gets the rope from the bottom drawer of the dresser. He unravels the rope, holding the two ends in one hand, and starts running his fingers over it, finding the center of it. 

“Your safe words?” The blonde walks around him so he’s standing in front of Eren.

“Traffic light. Red, yellow and green.”

Jean looks up from the rope with a small smile. “Good.”

When he finally finds the center of the rope, he makes a knot about 20 inches from the bend in the rope, creating a large loop with two long tails falling from the knot. The large loop goes over Eren’s head and rests around his neck with some slack hanging in the back. Jean adjusts the placement of the knot so it’s just under the collarbones and instructs the brunette to hold it in place. He spins Eren around so his back is facing him and ties another knot that rests at the nape of his neck, now a smaller loop hangs in the back. Eren lets go of the knot he was holding and turns back around. Jean’s hand replaces Eren’s holding the top knot and runs his other hands down the tails of the rope so they run straight down the front of his sub’s torso. He makes a second knot at the end of his sternum. Another a few inches above his navel and the last one a few inches below. 

Every knot is carefully tied, Jean avoiding the tail ends of the rope from flailing and hitting Eren. Anytime he smoothed the rope between knots he let his fingertips or knuckles brush against the bronze skin. Each touch feels intentional despite how light they feel.

Jean crouches low to guide the tail ends of the rope to the sides of his cock and through to the back of Eren’s legs. 

The brunette watches closely as Jean’s hands work the rope over his body. The knots are tied slowly and precisely. When the blonde goes down, he can feel the rope glide up the back of his thighs and stop just under his ass and then wrap around the outside of his hips. Knowing what’s coming next, Eren raises his arms to a loose T stance. Jean’s movements become a little quicker as he stands and starts threading the rope between the knots, crossing over Eren’s back, then to the front again. He tugs on the rope, tightening the harness as he goes, hearing Eren’s breath hitch with each jerk on the rope. He pulls them tight and let’s the rope relax between his fingers before he goes around Eren’s body again and repeats. Eren can already feel the flush in his cheeks spreading further down his neck to his shoulders as Jean turns him around to tie the final knot at the nape of his neck. Cool fingers run under the ropes, checking the tension and shifting their position so they lie correctly across Eren’s back. The blonde walks around the bound body looking at the diamond pattern running down the center of his torso. Eren relaxes his arms down by his sides waiting for the next order from his Dom.

Jean takes a long look at Eren’s body and then tilts his head towards the bed. “Why don’t you get back up on the bed for me and face the mirror.”

Eren takes the few steps over to the bed, well aware of the amber eyes following him, and sits as he was before in the middle of the bed. He doesn’t look at himself in the mirror yet, he looks back and watches Jean grab a few items off the top of the dresser. The blonde joins him on the bed, close, at his back. Lube and condoms are set off to the side, easily reachable for when they need it. Eren’s eyes are focused on the edge of the bed until he feels cool hands on his hips. Blue-green meets molten amber in the mirror and then fall to the pale hands on his bronze hips. He watches those fingers smooth down his thighs till they rest on the inside of his knees. Hot breath ghosts over the skin behind his ear.

“Color?”

Eren takes a second to soak in their reflection in front of him. His naked body beautifully tied in black rope, his Dom still fully clothed behind him, fingers teasing the skin on his knees. 

The brunette nods his approval, “Green.”

He sees Jean’s cheshire smile and watches it spread across his lips. 

“Good.” There’s such a devious undertone to that one word that has Eren internally squirming. 

“Spread your legs.” 

Slowly, Eren adjusts his legs with the added pressure of his Dom’s hands pushing apart his knees. As the angle between his legs get wider, those fingers dance higher, barely touching, just caressing his hot skin. Each delicate brush of those fingers leaves him wanting more, craving that searing touch he knows Jean possesses. Those hands stop when they reach the crease of his thighs, not going any higher. 

“Now listen very carefully.” Eren could listen to him for days if he talked like that all the time. “Keep your eyes on the mirror. Do not look away. Understand?”

“I understand, Sir.” He meets Jean’s gaze in the mirror, watches his Dom’s pink tongue swipe across his lips before he speaks in his ear again.

“Here’s what I want you to do.” Jean thumbs draw circles on his inner thighs. “It’s very easy…I want you to touch yourself.”

Eren raises an eyebrow, “That’s all you want me to do?”

“Mhmm, and I’m gonna watch you.” At that, Jean detaches himself from his sub’s warm body and sits back against the headboard, still able to see Eren’s reflection in the mirror in front of him. 

The air feels cold at his back now that Jean moved. Even without looking in the mirror Eren can still feel his Dom’s presence behind him. Feel his eyes roving over his body’s reflection. 

“You can start whenever your ready. We got all day.” Jean pushes the bottle of lube with his foot down the bed next to Eren’s leg. 

His sub eyes the bottle’s reflection and reaches over for it. The brunette pours a little bit of lube in his hand and makes a light fist around his length and slowly starts wetting his half hard cock. A quiet sigh leaves his parted lips. Eren glances down at his hand around his length before remembering he has to keep his eyes on the mirror. So he watches his own hand in the mirror, slick and wet, sliding over his hardening member. When he’s fully hard he grips it just a bit tighter, twisting his wrist up and around the head. The fingers on the underside of his shaft press into the thick vein and his thumb rubs over the head teasing the slit. 

His eyes stray to the shadowed figure sitting behind him looking for some kind of comment but receives none. Looks like he’s on his own for a bit. Eren smiles to himself, it’s been a while since he’s gotten himself off, Jean takes good care of him in that respect. 

The hand around his cock picks up the speed and he spreads his legs just a little wider, thrusting his hips forward slightly into his own fist. His mouth falls open, letting out small moans and harsh breaths. He starts to alternate between fast pumps and languid pulls, sometimes concentrating just on the head.

Eren observes his body’s reactions. His abdominals clenching whenever he speeds up, the rise and fall of his chest wrapped tightly in the black rope, and the red flush that has creeped further down his chest. The way low moans drip from his lips, eyes half lidded fogged over with lust. His free hand grips his thigh and rakes his nails over the thick skin. The brunette throws his head back at the harsh sensation whimpering for more.

“Kinda defeats the purpose of the mirror if you close your eyes Eren.”

He didn’t even realize he closed his eyes. His head snaps up, wide black eyes with a thin strip of green around the edge stare back. He slows the movement of his hand, dragging this out just a bit longer, keeping a loose fist around his cock. 

“What are you thinking about?” Jean tilts his head in curious interest. 

Eren’s lips quirk on one side, his eyes meeting Jean’s reflection. “You.”

He raises an eyebrow to that pleasing response. “What about me?”

The brunette moans low in his throat, squeezing his length a little tighter, his eyes back on his own hand’s movements. “Mmmm…your mouth—ngh fuck—your tongue. Biting me. Marking me.” 

“That it?”

Eren shakes his head. “Your hands, the bruises they leave on my hips.” 

The sheets rustle and Eren can feel the mattress dip behind him.

“Anything else?” His voice is like velvet caressing his ear.

The brunette emits a happy hum, “Your cock and how bad I want it.” 

Jean runs his hands down Eren’s sides and grips the crossed ropes on the front of the brunette’s hips. The slight pull on the rope tightens the harness pulling a groan from wearer. 

“Show me how bad you want it.” He stares at Eren’s cock in the mirror, slick from the lube and the pre come dripping from the tip. “Keep going.”

His hand hasn’t stopped stroking, gliding up and down at a teasing pace. Eren was starting to feel the coil tightening in his gut before Jean spoke, so he if keeps going, it won’t be before long till he finishes. Just as he picks up the pace slightly, he feels Jean’s lips against his shoulder, placing light kisses. One of the blonde’s hands leaves his hips and moves up to thread pale fingers through thick brown hair. Those fingers soothe and massage his scalp before he grips the hair tight at the roots and sinks his teeth into the meat of Eren’s shoulder. 

“Hhhahhaa. Please, again.” Eren pants.

Jean keeps the grip in his hair tight as his mouth travels across his upper back and shoulders, nipping lightly then biting hard to leave deep, red, teeth marks. He runs his tongue over the sweat slick skin, easing the sting from the bite. Eren is getting close, his fist flying furiously over his weeping cock, panting out a staccato rhythm. 

“Jean. J-jeaan. F-fuck.” 

The blonde looks up into the mirror, Eren’s body is shaking against him, begging for release. “You wanna come?”

“Y-yes, yes, please.” 

“Since you asked so nicely,” he grins against the brunette’s shoulder, “Go ahead.”

Eren watches his release spill over his hand and land on the sheet underneath them, whimpering curses and praises. Jean holds him, pressing kisses along the top of his spine on his neck. When the brunette’s orgasm ceases he leans back against Jean again, like he had before they started, sated and messy. He wipes his hand on the sheet and covers Jean’s arms across his chest with his own. 

“You still want it?” Jean rubs his still hard cock against Eren’s lower back, devilish smile adorning his lips. 

“Fuck, yes.” 

The next thing he knows, Eren is being pushed forward and flipped onto his back, his head hanging off the end of the bed, looking upside in the mirror. He hears the telling swish of Jean pulling his shirt over his head and the metallic clicking of undoing his pant’s zipper. The blonde pulls his pants and boxers down to his knees and scoots forward between Eren’s legs, reaching over for the condom. He rolls it over his cock very aware of the blue-green eyes watching him. Eren’s propped up on his elbows, restless, eye’s trained on the blonde’s now lube slick fingers. His chest is already rising and falling heavily with just the thought of those fingers working him open. The first finger circles his entrance, soaking it, teasing. Eren’s arms give out and he lies flat on his back again. Jean hovers over him, an arm braced at the brunette’s side. 

“Give me a color.” Eren writhes impatiently.

“Fucking green babe, c’mon.” Jean’s finger pauses its movement and he looks at Eren with an expectant look. Eren’s eyes widen when he realizes his mistake, “Shit, Sir, sorry sorry.”

“You want your punishment now, or take double later?” The blonde smirks, already knowing his sub’s answer.

“Later, please, Sir.” If there’s any chance of getting more he’ll take it. 

Jean laughs through his nose and starts circling his finger again, pressing against the puckered hole. “Color still green?”

“Yes, Sir, yes yes yesss.”

The blonde’s finger pushes past the ring of muscle and continues to ease in. He works quickly but thoroughly. By the time he has three fingers working Eren open, the brunette’s cock is lying heavy and hard against his stomach. Eren is swearing up a storm under his breath, the sheets gripped tight in his fists, he’s positive Jean is punishing him now instead of later like he asked by teasing him this long. As soon as the thought passes through his mind, Jean pulls out his fingers, and seconds later the head of his cock is pressing in. Eren mewls loudly, finally getting what he’s been wanting. 

When he’s in to the hilt, Jean lifts Eren’s right leg over his shoulder, ever so slightly twisting the brunette’s hips, sinking in impossibly deeper. He grinds against him, waiting for the go ahead. 

Eren lifts his head, glaring at the blonde. “Fucking hell…I’m good—AHHhh.” 

Jean pulled out and quickly thrust back in hard. “What happened to liking the anticipation.”

“Still like it, but still really impatient.” he smiles back.

His Dom leans forward, bending Eren’s leg back closer to his chest, “So you want it fast and hard?”

“Hell yes, please.”

Jean rocks his hips back and forth a few times, building up speed until Eren’s body is steadily rocking on the mattress from their hips impact. The brunette’s head rolls back, hanging off the edge of the bed, a constant string of low moans coming from his mouth. Jean can still see his blissed out expression in the mirror’s reflection. He watches his own body, the sensual roll of his abs thrusting his hips forward to meet Eren’s. His hand grabs on to the ropes on the brunette’s hips again, reminding him of the harness wrapped around him. However, Eren didn’t forget it. He could feel the ropes rolling under him against his back, every time he breathed he felt the ropes constrict around his chest. Between the friction of the rope against his skin and the smooth friction between their two bodies, Eren feels his second release building rapidly. He opens his eyes to see, and feel, Jean nip at his calf resting over his shoulder. 

The blonde’s rhythm is starting to become frantic, pounding away at Eren’s tight hole. He nails his sweet spot perfectly, eliciting obscene cries from the brunette’s throat. His heat tightening around his cock and the chant of Jean’s name carries both of them over the edge. 

Eren lies limp on the bed, white painted across his chest, sticking to his skin and parts of the rope. Jean eases his leg down and pulls out gently. He sluggishly begins the after care routine. He helps Eren sit up so he can untie the harness and once the ropes are loosened from their design, he falls back on the bed, the rope messy and tangled on top of of his legs. Eren tells Jean he wants to post pone the massage and just lie there for a while. Jean agrees and finally fully removes his pants so he can move around more easily. When he’s cleaned himself up he lies back down next to Eren. 

“Can we keep that up for a few days?” the brunette asks nodding towards the mirror.

“I take it you liked it then?”

“Yea! I want a mirror on the fucking ceiling now.” 

Jean laughs, “Maybe in my next place.”

“Mmmm get one with three bedrooms or a basement so we can have a play room. Mirrors everywhere.”

“Oh god, I’ve created a monster.” 

“A hungry one at that.” He presses the length of his body along Jean’s, wrapping his arm around his waist and using his other arm to prop up his head. “Shower, then a late lunch?”

“Eat out or stay in?”

“Stay in. I might want round three later.”

Jean shakes his head, “You’re insatiable.”

“Of course I am, you’re sexy as hell.” 

“Ugh, go take your shower, I’ll order some food.” 

Jean rolls out of the bed, and pulls on the boxers and pants he discarded only a few minutes ago. Eren scoots to the side of the bed and sits upright on the edge. He grabs Jean by his belt loops when he tries to walk away and pulls him into his arms. Eren kisses his chest, just above his heart.

“Love you.”

Jean’s hands cradle the sides of Eren’s head and he leans forward to kiss the crown of his head. “Love you too.”

Eren lets the silence go for a beat, “So round three—“

“Is not going to happen in the shower.” Jean pulls away, gently, and starts walking towards the bedroom door.

“Aw come on. I wasn’t even going to ask that.”

“Uh huh.” Jean has already got the door open and starts walking down the hallway.

“I was gonna ask if I could top next time!” he shouts so the blonde could hear him.

“We’ll see!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you're wondering, no that was not the first time they said they loved each other. At this point they've reached the beginning of their six months together and I imagined them saying it at some point in the fifth month. Jean probably did something cheesy and told Eren on Valentine's Day. *shrugs*
> 
> Not sure what's going to come next. I have a few things roughed out, nothing smutty yet though, my list is getting smaller. I'm open to ideas if you want to drop a request in the comments or message me on tumblr at freekishly.tumblr.com. That's my general inspiration blog so if you ask for something on anon or not, I won't answer publicly, just a heads up, but know that I will read it. :)
> 
> As always, thank you so much for the kudos and comments. I'm so glad so many of you like this.


	14. Early August, Year One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time jump!  
> A vanilla quickie and a lot of fluff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god! So sorry for such a delayed update!! I fell into a creative block at work and it kind of followed me home so it took me forever to finish this chapter. I would have had it done last weekend but I had family come to visit and I couldn't really write smut while sitting next to my mom...so! here it is, some 3 weeks late. 
> 
> I apologize for any choppy bits, weird wording and spelling. It was a struggle sometimes to focus on this but I wanted to get it done. 
> 
>  
> 
>  **Little side note:** I mention temperatures a few times in this chapter and I just want to say they are all in Fahrenheit. Don't want to freak out any readers who use Celsius.
> 
> Anyways, hope this came out ok :/

The past month and a half has been a roller coaster of emotions. There were highs and lows—excitement, anger, confusion, frustration, relief, joy—you name it, they felt it. In the end, it was all worth it because what they got out of it was a new townhouse. 

That’s right! They’re moving in together. Jean initially freaked out, thinking it was too soon but, after taking a look around his apartment he realized they were already basically living together. Eren had kind of unofficially moved in a few months ago. Most of his clothes were in Jean’s closet, half his movie collection was on the shelf in the living room, and he’s had his own toiletries in the bathroom since they started their D/s relationship. It happened so subtly that neither of them noticed. Eren went from just staying over just on the weekends, when they first started dating, to staying half the week by 4 months and, for the last 2 months, he’s probably stayed at his own place three times. So really, it’s not too absurd to be moving into their own place.

They’ll still only be renting the townhouse, not quite ready to fully commit and buy a place and have a mortgage. The tenants living there now are moving out in a week when their lease is up, then the owning company is going to refresh the paint, hardware and flooring before Jean and Eren move in. So by the end of this month, they’ll have a new place to live.

It’s sweltering out today (according to Jean). Temperature is in the high 80s, it’s humid and sunny with no clouds for just a hint of relief. The blonde has been grumpy and complaining about the heat all day. They’ve been inside Eren’s apartment most of the day, packing up Eren’s things. Armin and Mikasa are working, so it’s just the two of them for right now. The air conditioning in the apartment isn’t great and their constant moving around and shifting things isn’t helping them stay cool. 

Eren has been going around the apartment picking up things that are his. There isn’t too much outside of his room since he shares a lot the stuff with Armin and Mikasa. He does one last sweep of the place and seals up a small box of miscellaneous things before he goes back to his room to check on Mr. Grumpy.

For the past few minutes Jean has been hunched under the desk in the brunette’s bedroom taking down the desktop computer. What should have taken just 5 minutes has turned into 15 minutes because Eren can’t organize wires for shit. The brunette leans in the doorway of his room just watching Jean. He can hear him swearing to himself about organization and unneeded wires and “what the fuck does this even go to, it’s not even connected to anything.” Eren snickers when he hears that and Jean peaks out from under the desk to glare at him. 

“Having fun?” Eren asks.

Jean shakes his head and ducks back under the desk. “This is ridiculous! There’s so many unnecessary wires. I went to school and got a degree for this shit and I still don’t understand why you have some of these.” 

Eren knows he’s exaggerating and just shrugs it off. He pushes off the door jamb and walks inside the room to sit on the bed. “Just take a break for a minute then.”

He huffs out a breath, “Nah, I’m almost done.” 

For the next few minutes the brunette watches him work, coiling the wires and securing them in a zip tie so they won’t unravel. When he starts sorting everything into boxes, Eren looks around his room. This has been his home for the last 6 years. It’s been home since he started college. At the time, it was cheaper to share this place with Armin and Mikasa and buy their own food than it was to live on campus with a meal plan. They’ve been together since elementary school so it was a no brainer to move in with them. 

Blue-green eyes fall back to Jean when he stands up with the box of computer stuff and goes to move it out into the hallway, out of the way. Now that Eren thinks of it, this is one of the rare times Jean has even been in this apartment. Sure, he’d come over for parties or small friend gatherings but only a handful of times by himself to hang out. Every other time they would be out doing something. Once they started their D/s relationship, everything happened at Jean’s place. With Armin and Mikasa around they couldn’t ever have a session here. Plus it would have involved Jean bringing all the toys with him and that just didn’t make any sense when Eren could just go there. Then when they started dating, Eren liked the privacy they got at the blonde’s. So seeing him here now is kind of surreal. 

Jean shrugs off the open button-up shirt he’s wearing, revealing the light t-shirt he has on underneath. “Ugh, remind me never to move in the fucking summer ever again.”

The brunette hums in agreement but now his thoughts are a little distracted because of the innocent removal of clothing. Jean’s continues shifting things around and to talking to him about the AC not working properly and it’s no wonder he stays over his place as often as he does, but Eren can barely hear him over the thought of—

“We’ve never had sex in my room before.” he sounds awed by his own statement.

Jean stops what he was doing and stares at Eren because, one, he clearly wasn’t just listening, and two, that has to be the worst blunt attempt of seduction Eren has ever tried. 

“Yeah, cause you live with two other people, one of which could kill me and the other would know how to hide the body, and you sleep in a fucking twin bed.”

Eren narrows his eyes slightly on that last comment. “You fucked me on an ottoman, you can’t complain about a twin bed.”

“Still have roommates.” he mutters.

“Who aren’t here right _now._ ”

The blonde bites on the inside of his cheek and looks out towards the hallway. Armin and Mikasa aren’t expected back for at least another 3 hours.

“Please? I want you to be my last hurrah in the old room.” Eren pushes out his bottom lip making a pouty face.

Jean smirks and raises an amused eyebrow at him, “Who was the last person?”

A blush creeps across the top of Eren’s cheeks as he raises his hand, wiggling his fingers for emphasis. He’s never brought anyone back here for the reasons Jean previously listed. 

“Wow. That’s sad.” the blonde teases.

The brunette chucks his pillow at him, “Shut up.”

Jean laughs and catches the pillow that flies at his face. He maneuvers around the piles on the floor to stand in front of Eren. The pillow gets tossed back on the bed where it belongs. Eren scoots back on the bed so he’s not sitting so close to the edge and Jean places his knees on either side of his hips to straddle his lap. He snakes his arms around Eren’s neck, playing with the hairs at the base of his skull. 

“So as the first and last hurrah, you want top or bottom?”

He considers the question for a moment, imagining Jean underneath him coming undone in his sheets and moans of his name bouncing off these walls.

Eren gives him a wicked smile when he answers, “Top.”

There is no time for Jean to respond. In one swift move, Eren pins him on his back with the blonde’s long legs on either side of his hips. Early on, Eren had caught on to Jean’s like of being manhandled a little bit. He doesn’t allow it during their scenes so Eren likes to take full advantage outside of them. Jean lets out a laugh when his back hits the mattress and Eren hovers over him with one of his brilliant smiles.

Eren isn’t one for drawn out foreplay, Jean does that enough for the both of them in and outside of their scenes. So when the brunette gets to determine the pace, he goes for it full throttle. Plus, in this case, with the risk of his roommates coming home early, he wants to spare them the sight of the two of them going at it. 

He leans down, hungrily capturing Jean’s lips and coaxing them open while his hands skim up his torso under his shirt. The fabric gets bunched under his arms and Eren’s hands travel back down to the clasp on Jean’s shorts. He gets the button undone and the zipper halfway down before Jean whines impatiently and breaks the kiss. Eren sits up to pull off his shirt and Jean does the same, throwing the clothing somewhere on the messy floor. Jean’s shorts and boxers are next, the brunette quickly sliding them down his legs and then removing his own. He reaches between the mattress and box spring for the lube and crawls back over Jean, their bodies aligning perfectly to grind against each other, skin on skin. Trails of kisses make their way across his collar bones and a devious tongue licks a hot stripe up his neck to his jaw making Jean groan next to Eren’s ear. 

“Want to roll over for me?” 

Jean can feel Eren smile against his ear as he makes his request. The blonde thinks it’s cute how he always asks for things, never demands or manhandles him how he wants Jean (even though Jean totally wouldn’t mind the latter). 

As he begins to shift his body under Eren, the brunette sits up and gives Jean the little space he needs to get on his knees and elbows. As soon as he’s settled on his forearms, Jean looks over his shoulder, Eren is eyeing him up and down, fingers ghosting over his hips teasing his already heated skin. 

“So you going to fuck me with your eyes the whole time or what?” Jean gives Eren a challenging smile over his shoulder, subtly pushing his hips back. 

The brunette chuckles and bites on his lips when his hands slide to grab Jean’s ass. “You don’t get to talk, you would drag this out for hours if you could.”

“Mmmm, that’s true.” He smiles to himself and Eren reaches for the lube on the bed. 

Jeans hisses when he feels the cool liquid against his sensitive skin. Warmth spreads as Eren covers his back with his chest, kissing the top few vertebra. 

“Ready?” 

He sighs and nods his head, “Yea.”

The first finger lazily circles the puckered hole before it pushes in, working in circular motions to help stretch as it sinks further. Jean breathes in deeply, exhaling slowly as the first finger slides all the way in. Unfortunately there is no time for teasing, Eren thrusts his finger in and out, already grazing a second finger around his hole. Jean can be just as greedy as Eren sometimes, rocking back on Eren’s fingers when the second one joins the first. 

It’s so god damn tempting to take his time and make Jean feel good like this, with just his fingers, watching his spine roll and twist. There’s a grace in the way that he moves, a fierce sensuality that’s hard to ignore. Eren loves watching him move, eyes drawn like a moth to a flame, it can be hypnotizing. 

He thrusts his fingers in a little harsher than before, brushing over Jean’s prostate before he slides in a third finger. The blonde whimpers at the sensation, feeling full but not full enough. The craving for more is burning in his lower belly, needing the feel of a thick cock ramming in and out till he’s incapable of anything but moaning Eren’s name. 

Eren’s lips leave wet kisses over his back, tasting the salt of his skin, admiring the flush creeping down his neck and shoulders. 

“You look so fucking good right now.” Eren breathes.

“Yeah?” Jean laughs. “Sweaty and horny works for you then huh?” He meets Eren’s blue-green eyes over his shoulder and his toothy grin.

“Definitely.” He teases his fingers over the sensitive bundle of nerves and Jean lets out a loud involuntarily moan.

“Mmm, ok I’m good. Let’s go.” Jean pushes his hips back again. 

Eren doesn’t need to be told twice. His cock has been hard since this started, he’s ready. He grabs for the lube again and takes his fingers out of Jean’s ass. The liquid feels cool slicking up the heated flesh of his cock, just the simple touch of his hand has him raring to go. He slides his cock between Jean’s cheeks, smearing lube over his hole and crack. The blonde likes it messy, loves the sweat, saliva, come, all of it.

Jean clenches his teeth when Eren’s cock opens him up. The stretch burning away into pleasure as Jean adjusts around it, feeling the entire bare length inside him. A slow roll of his hips has him biting back a moan, Eren’s hand on his hip gripping just a little tighter. He can feel his forehead below his neck and his hot breath on his spine. 

“How do you want it?”

“However you want, just fucking move, _please._ ”

The weight leaves his back and Eren’s hands slide up and down his back, before gripping the blonde’s shoulder and thrusting his hips forward. Sounds of skin slapping skin fill the humid room, heavy panting adding to the thick air. Their bodies are sweating from the heat and the sex but they are already too far gone to care. Jean rests his head on his wrists breathing and moaning into the sheets that are gripped tight in his hands. The pace isn’t as hard or fast as Jean knows Eren can go but it’s still making his mind fuzzy. He knows there’s a time limit but, fuck, if he doesn’t want this to last longer.

Fiery hands burn on his hips, gripping tight, pulling Jean back every time Eren thrusts forward. The steady pace of Eren’s hips has Jean moaning through his clenched teeth and clutching the sheets in a vice like grip. He’s reach a plateau of constant pleasure, something only Eren has ever been able to do to him. The heat has been simmering in his lower regions for the past few minutes and he’s just on the edge of completely losing his mind in ecstasy. A sudden rough thrust has Jean jolting forward, the sheets sliding under his forearms. 

“ _…fuck…_ ” The word, just barely above a whisper, slips out of Jean’s lips. 

Eren stills his hips after another hard thrust in and stares at the body in front of him. Sunlight through the window makes their skin glisten, highlighting the sweat dripping over their bodies. Jean keeps his head hung low, his breathing is deep and steady. After a moment of no movement from Eren, Jean squeezes around his cock as he rocks his hips forward ever so slowly, wringing a moan out of the brunette. When Eren still doesn’t move, Jean turns to yell at him but, the brunette pulls out and flips him over before he can say anything. 

“I wanna see you.” He kisses along the blonde’s jaw and Jean writhes underneath him, arching his hips up for attention.

Jean reaches between them and lines himself up with the cock he’s now desperate for. Eren snaps his hips forward, driving his cock back inside, pale legs wrapping around and clinging to his waist, keeping him close. He grinds their hips together, the tip of his length brushing against Jean’s sweet spot. A hand grips the back of Eren’s neck and pulls him down to meet Jean’s lips, the deep kiss only interrupted by the occasional whine or moan. Jean drapes his arms over Eren’s strong shoulder’s and threads his fingers through his hair, the soft locks standing up in every direction, fucked out and still sexy.

“You gonna make me beg?” Jean teases, tilting his hips up against Eren’s slow grind.

“I thought about it,” his wicked grin raises Jean’s eyebrow. 

“Aaand— _Ahh s-shit!_ ” 

Rough hands grab behind Jean’s knees, pushing them closer to his chest, bending him in half, cock slipping in just that much deeper. 

“ _SHIT! FUCK! Right there!_ ”

“I like the sound of that more than your begging.” They’re nose to nose, Eren grinning proudly.

He leans forward to kiss Jean again, the blonde capturing his bottom lip between his teeth when Eren picks up the pace. An animalistic growl rumbles from the brunette’s throat and he pounds into Jean faster and harder. His hands grip onto his back for dear life, his grasp slipping on the sweat of his skin. Eren feels Jean dig his nails into his shoulder blades and they rake down the length of his back, painting red passionate streaks. 

“Mmm, _FUCK!_ ” Eren pants, trying to keep the rhythm steady but he’s getting close and his hips are sloppy.

“ _Ngh!_ You like that.” Even though Jean is getting the shit fucked out him he can still manage to smirk up at the guy above him.

“Mhmm,” he’s nodding his head frantically, eyes shut tight. 

Slender fingers knead over the skin on Eren’s lower back, just the pads digging into the muscles. Heat is coiling in Eren’s gut, he tucks his face into the crook of Jean’s neck, listening to his partner’s moans and mumbling praises. Nails drag across his back again forcing his thrusts to hit harder. Jean’s cries tell him he’s found his sweet spot and keeps the angle steady even though his thrusts are starting to become more frantic. 

Heat squeezes his cock, pulling him closer to blinding ecstasy. He pulls away from Jean’s neck, sitting up to look down at the blonde. His cock is lying on his stomach, red and dripping. The hands that were on his back now cling to his biceps, probably going to leave small bruises. Jean is fucking beautiful when he’s falling apart, head thrown back trying to gasp for air between curses and Eren’s name. His own grip on the back of Jean’s knees tighten, almost there.

“I’m g-gonna come.”

One of Jean’s hands fly to fist his own cock, pumping at the same furious rate as Eren’s thrusting rhythm. The other stays locked onto Eren’s arm. His release is building…building…

Stars fill his vision behind his lids when his orgasm hits, spilling hot inside Jean’s ass, excess dripping out while he continues to pound into the blonde’s hole. Jean bite’s his bottom lip hiding his satisfied smile when Eren comes inside. The slick slide of the cock inside him, still savagely pumping in and out brings him over the edge, painting white across his chest. 

If he hadn’t just finished his orgasm, the sight below him and the tightness around his cock right now would have made Eren lose his mind. Jean looks absolutely wrecked, hair in every direction, a red flush from his forehead to his belly button, sweat and come stick to his skin stretched across his panting ribs. Fucking hell, it could almost make Eren go for another round. 

As Jean comes down from his high, Eren eases his hips and legs back down on the bed, pulling out gently, more come oozing out onto the sheets. 

“That a good enough memory for ya?” Eren meets amber eyes and sees the lust burning out and fondness flowing in.

“More than good.” Jean chuckles and pulls him down into a quick kiss. “I fucking love you, you know that.”

Jean’s face lights up in a smile he only gives Eren, and it’s Eren’s favorite smile. “I know.” His fingers tug on the curls on the base of the brunette’s skull, “Love you too.”

In the few minutes they lie there together, the air around them has not cooled down, it’s still humid and hot and Jean can’t help but to complain.

“Ok, as much as I love basking in the after glow, this heat is making it really gross.”

Eren snorts, “It’s not even that hot out. It’s better than it was last week when it was in the high 90s.”

“Eren, in the 14 years you’ve known me, you should know I don’t like anything over 75 degrees.”

“Well then, how about a nice cold shower to make you feel better.”

“Fuck yes, let’s go let’s go.” 

He pushes Eren off him and slips off the bed to head for the bathroom down the hall. Eren cackles and follows after him. The water is already running when he walks in, Jean sticking his hand under the stream to check the temperature. Eren crowds him, backing him into the small shower stall, pressing his back against the cool tiles. A better portion of the shower time is spent making out under the cold spray, bruising each other’s lips and Eren sucking the cool water from Jean’s neck. They do eventually grab the soap and clean themselves off. 

Neither of them hear the front door open when they walk out in the hallway with towels around their waists. Armin just rounds the corner to see both of them before they disappear into Eren’s room.

“You guys better not have done anything in there. I just cleaned the bathroom yesterday.” Eren turns around at his voice and sees Armin pretending to sulk.

“Relax Ar, it was just a shower, I promise.” Both of them can hear Jean’s snicker from the bedroom. 

“Whatever you say Eren.” he walks past him, smiling, going to his own room. “Might want to put something on the scratches on your back though.”

Armin and his sass. “Yeah yeah.”

When the brunette walks back into his room, Jean’s already dressed. What a shame, Eren thinks. 

“Let me see.” Jean signals for Eren to turn around. 

Eren shuts his door and goes to where Jean is standing, light fingers run over the lines on his back.

“Admiring your work?” Eren laughs.

Jean snorts. “I admit, it’s not my best.” 

They’re both quiet for a moment. Eren closes his eyes as Jean’s fingers continue to graze over his skin. He feels the blonde’s lips kiss the nape of his neck and then again behind his ear. Jean hooks his chin over the brunette’s shoulder and holds him in his arms. 

“I can start dinner if you want to finish up in here.” 

Eren tilts his head to the side to rest it against the blonde hair. “I think Armin is cooking tonight.”

Jean hums. “Do you want me to help you or Armin then?”

Jean knows it won’t be easy for Eren to leave this place, his home with Armin and Mikasa. They’ve been friends since they were young and have created a little family, just the three of them. He realizes it’s going to take some time to get use to, even though for the half year Eren has mostly been at Jean’s. This is still his home though, so Jean will give him the space if he needs it.

“You can help me shift some of the boxes out and I can take care of the rest.”

“Ok.”

Eren gets dressed and they take a few minutes to sort the boxes and tape up the ones that are full. Then Eren kicks Jean out of the room to go help Armin.

The shorter blonde is already in the kitchen, pulling ingredients out of the fridge and cabinets to set them out on the counter. Jean shuffles in to see if there is anything he can do. Armin is more than happy for the help so he has Jean cut up a few vegetables while he starts cooking the meat on the stove. 

Armin clears his throat, “So, uh, how’s the packing going?”

A sly smile graces Jean’s face. “Almost done. Eren’s handling the last few things for today.” He continues chopping for a minute before he asks, “Are you and Mikasa really ok with him moving out?” 

Bright blue eyes look back at Jean. “Of course! I mean, yeah, we’ll miss him but we’ll still see each other all the time. Mikasa works with him and I’m nearby so I can meet him for lunch or I’ll just see him on the weekends. It will be good for him to get out. Good for both of you.”

Jean just finishes cutting and looks over at Armin who’s wearing a warm smile. 

“I’m happy for both of you. You guys work really well together, way better than I thought you would.” He sees Jean furrow his brows, a curious light in his eyes. “Eren has always hid a part of himself from other people, the only ones he’s shown that side with were his Doms. But he never shared his full self with them either because that wasn’t part of their arrangement. He doesn’t have to hide parts of himself from you. You’ve seen sides to him that neither Mikasa or I have ever seen. The fact the you have and accept every side of Eren, that’s incredibly important to him. It’s important to Mikasa and me too. We’ve wanted Eren to find someone who could do that, and that turned out to be you.”

Jean isn’t sure how to reply to that. But the genuine smile from Armin says he doesn’t have to say anything. So he just slides the cut up veggies towards him to add to the meat that had been cooking. Just as Armin is pouring the vegetables in the pan a loud crash comes from Eren’s room. 

Armin calls out to him, “You ok in there?” 

Eren sighs loudly, “Yeah. The box broke and all the stuff fell out.” He can hear the two blondes’ muffled laughs in the kitchen.

“I’ll go check on him if you’re all set.” Jean says. Armin smiles an says he’s all set and thanks him for helping out.

When he goes back to Eren’s room, he finds the brunette sitting on the floor taping up the bottom of the broken box. All around him are trophies, medals and ribbons from all of Eren’s fighting tournaments. 

“You should find a spot in the new place to put those out on display.”

Eren looks back at Jean in the doorway and his eyes follow the blonde as he sits down next to him on the floor. He picks up a random medal, it’s gold of course, and smooths his thumb over the engraving. It’s delicately handed over to Eren who places it in the box. 

“Maybe I’ll put out a few.” He pauses and stares into the box. “Do you mind if I stay here tonight?”

“Of course not.” Jean huffs out a small laugh, “You don’t have to ask me you know. This is _your_ home.” He bumps his shoulder with Eren to get a little smile. He gets one. “You could stay here for the next 2 weeks if you really wanted to. Course I’d miss my bed warmer, but I get it. It’s hard to leave.”

It still shocks Eren how understanding Jean is sometimes. To an outsider, or someone just meeting him, he’s a rude, sarcastic, blunt bastard. But once you get to really know him, and peel back all those layers, he’s still sarcastic, but kind and loyal. For a long time the brunette wondered how Marco stuck around him this long, and now he gets why. 

“Are you even real? What happened to the asshole I used to know?” 

Jean laughs, “Oh that guy? He’s still around. Started dating this real bastard though.”

“Mmm, I heard the bastard was hot.”

“He’s alright.” the blonde shrugs.

A rough hand shoves at his shoulder. “ _Pfft!_ Fuck you.”

They gather the rest of the trophies and medals and drop them in the box. Mikasa makes it home early and the two of them join her and Armin in the kitchen. Dinner is ready not too long after that and all four of them sit at the dining table. They talked about their day, about Eren and Jean’s new place and good old memories.

Eren and Mikasa offer to clear up after dinner since Armin cooked and Jean helped but was also technically still a guest. When everything was cleared, it was late enough for Mikasa to be tired and she headed for bed. Armin mentioned having to get a little bit of work done before he crashed for the night, so he shuffled off to his room. That left Eren and Jean by themselves in the living room so before they even got tempted, Jean rose from the couch saying they should start loading up the car with boxes. Something was off in Eren’s expression when he agreed but followed him back to his bedroom.

The blonde looks around the room and out at the boxes in the hallway. “So what do you want me to take first?”

As soon as those amber eyes are back on him, Eren reaches for Jean’s face to pull him into a kiss. The quick movement surprises Jean at first but quickly returns the kiss. When their lips slip apart, Eren rests his forehead against Jean’s, fingers scratching at the short hairs of his undercut. He’s speaks softly in the space between them.

“Stay.” _With me_ is implied. 

That one word tells Jean everything Eren is feeling. It’s the feeling of anticipated home sickness before even going somewhere. It’s the feeling of needing to be reassured that the decision that was made was the right one. It’s the fear of not being able to go back if things go wrong. It’s all the what-ifs. 

Jean has to admit he’s been waiting for Eren to show a little apprehension. They both got really wrapped up in the thought of a place they can call their home. He wants to reassure Eren that it is a good idea. Yes, it will be hard but they can get through anything together. Though, he doesn’t want to force him into anything he’s not ready to do.

“You really want me to?” Eren nods his head, rubbing their foreheads together. “Then I’ll stay.” 

If all Eren needs is a little reassurance, Jean can give that to him. He kisses Eren’s cheek before he steps back. 

“We have to change those sheets though.” 

The brunette laughs softly. “Yeah, probably should do that.”

Over the next 20 minutes, they make a pile out in the living room of boxes that will go to Jean’s apartment int he morning. They figured getting everything in one place would make the move easier, that way they are not running back and forth between three locations come move-in day. So they’ll move a few boxes at a time throughout the next two weeks. Eren finds a fresh set of sheets to put on the bed and throws the other in the pile of things that need to be washed. He doesn’t bother tucking the top sheet in, both of them will probably kick it off in the night. 

They realize it’s still pretty early for them to go to sleep but they still turn off the light, strip down into their boxers, and climb into bed. It takes a bit before they find a comfortable position on the small bed. Seventy percent of the time, they don’t snuggle or spoon when they sleep. Jean usually sleeps on his side or on his back and Eren sprawls out on his stomach. Over the course of the night they might move closer together so some part of their bodies touch. The other thirty percent is all tangled limbs and no sheets because Eren is warm enough for the both of them. So it’s a miracle they find a position that is comfy for the both of them in the small bed. 

The time before they fall asleep is spent in silence. Jean is on his back, on the outside edge of the bed. Eren is between him and the wall, but mostly on top of Jean with his head on his chest and legs tangled together. The blonde cards his fingers through Eren’s hair, massaging his scalp a little bit. Eren is absentmindedly drawing shapes with his finger on the back of Jean’s other hand resting on his stomach. The brunette’s movements gradually become slower until they come to a complete stop and his breathing becomes deeper and even. He’s already asleep. Jean’s still awake, still playing with the dark locks between his fingers. He thinks about the boy next to him. Runs the past 16 months through his mind. It feels so much longer than that, and yet, it feels like no time at all.

Sleep finds him a few minutes later.

Jean wakes up, surprisingly a little later than 7:30am, as the little spoon to Eren’s big spoon. He manages to escape his arms without waking him up, dresses himself and goes to make a pot of coffee he so desperately needs right now. As the coffee is brewing he stares at the boxes in the living room he needs to fit into his sedan and then need to find a place in his apartment to store them, which will most likely end up being his office. The coffee machine dings to signal it’s done and, as much as he hates doing it, he goes to wake up Eren. 

As the last box gets packed away in Jean’s car, Eren tells him he’s going to spend another night with Armin and Mikasa. 

“Ok.” He cups Eren’s face, smoothing his thumbs over his jawline. “I will not be staying. I’m going back to my central air and big ass bed.”

Eren laughs, “Figured.” He looks down at his feet before meeting Jean’s eyes again. “Thanks for staying with me last night.”

“You’re welcome.” Jean leans in and kisses Eren’s temple, “Love you.”

“Love you too, Babe.” Jean snorts at the pet name, he can’t get used to Eren calling him that over “asshole” or “bastard”. 

Jean turns towards his car and opens the driver door, “I’ll talk to you later.”

Eren nods and watches Jean get in his car, loaded with a bunch of his things, and drive away. He smiles to himself. Yeah, he’s made the right choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Phew, ok, so, I have a few ideas roughed out. Not sure which one I feel inspired to flesh out more yet, but hopefully a kinky one. 
> 
> I'm totally open to suggestions or requests (scene ideas, toys, props, whatever!), so if there's anything you want, whether it's a new idea or something you want to see more of, let me know :D A lot of you asked about the collar coming back before and I do plan on bringing it out again, just so you know ;)
> 
> Drop your thoughts in the comments or let me know on [tumblr](http://freekishly.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Till next time!


	15. Mid to Late April, Year One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean and Eren celebrate one year in their D/s relationship...part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M ALIVE!!
> 
> I've started to realize that trying to get one chapter out a week isn't really possible for me now because each chapter gets more and more detailed and sometimes feelings are involved and I struggle with that sometimes. 
> 
> AND this time I was distracted by other ideas and now I have the next 6 chapters planned out (one of them being an idea for a final chapter..yikes!) and at least 3 of them are already roughed out. 
> 
> AND I roughed out a one shot from a different AU and I don't know what my brain was thinking when it thought it would be ok to do that. UGH! These boys have taken over my life! I might post the one shot before the next chapter for this gets out...we'll see.
> 
> Anyway! You guys who have been reading are awesome! I never thought I would break 1000 hits let alone 3500 so I'm like beyond words. Thank you!
> 
> Oh! And if anyone has any ideas/requests, drop me a comment here or on [tumblr](http://freekishly.tumblr.com/).
> 
> \- - -  
> Ok, I introduce a kinda OC in this chapter. They don't exist in SNK but I feel weird calling them an OC because I've never made one before. So yeah, there's that.
> 
> Please excuse any mistakes, I'm going to read through this again tomorrow and fix anything and add italics and all that good stuff, I'm just too lazy tonight.
> 
> Now enjoy some silly smutty boys.

The time on his phone tells him he’s 9 minutes late, which you’d think would be no big deal, but he’s never been late for this, ever. Rain soaks the hood and shoulders of his jacket and the hem of his pants are turning a shade darker from the amount of water accumulating in the fabric. When Jean sees the neon sign for the restaurant he picks up the pace to a slight jog, salvation ahead. Bells hanging on the door announce his arrival and he’s quick to shed the water from his bangs and his jacket. A bubbly hostess greets him with an obnoxiously friendly smile so he’s quick to tell her he’s meeting someone here. His eyes land on the table in the corner by one of the front windows, nods towards the hostess as if to say he’s all set, and heads for the table. 

The woman at the table can’t be older than 30, maybe late 20s. She’s wearing a rich, dark purple, button-up sleeveless blouse, matched with a tight black pencil skirt that ends just past her knees and black short heeled shoes with a shiny black pointed toe. Her auburn hair is pulled away from her face in a low pony tail that curls over her shoulder. If it’s possible, she has fairer skin than Jean, with pink undertones. Her posture is impeccably proper, back straight pressed against the chair, knees together and ankles crossed under her chair. The menu is held up in her hands, eyes scanning over all the options, but Jean already know she gets the same thing every time. Those intense chocolate eyes look up at him when he throws his jacket over the spare chair.

“Hey Brat,” a smile breaks wide over her face, laugh lines prominent around her mouth and eyes. 

“Mistress Lexi.” He gives her his most charming smile as she stands and pulls him into a tight hug.

“It’s been too long.” She squeezes him before stepping back and taking her seat again. “It’s so good to finally see you.”

“Always good to see you. I like the new hair color.” Her hair was fire engine red the last he saw her.

“Still a charmer.” Lexi shakes her head at him.

Jean just shrugs, “Can’t help it.”

Mistress Lexi. A well respected Domme in the area and the very woman who taught Jean almost everything he knows. They were in a D/s partnership for close to a year. For the first couple of months Jean was strictly her submissive, her bratty boy. She’d tie him up, torture him with her acrylic nails, perverted tongue and whatever toy she deemed worthy to punish him with. Jean would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy every second of that sweet torture.

His enjoyment though did not change his mind, he still wanted to be a Dom and she proved to be a fantastic teacher. Lexi helped him discover what kind of Dom he wanted to be and taught him all the tricks he wanted to know. To start off, she let him practice on her and later down the line, they’d share a sub and do a tag team routine so he could learn under her supervision. 

Eventually the time came when Jean was ready to be on his own, to have his own submissive. So, she let him go. Over the years they remained close friends though. Jean would still go to her for advice on techniques or how to deal with a certain type of sub. When there was finally no more to teach Jean, they still met up to swap stories and catch up on their personal lives.

It truly has been a long time since Jean has seen Lexi in person. The last time he saw her was almost 8 months ago. The two of them kept in touch during that time through texts and phone calls, though calls were rare. In the past year they’ve talked over the phone maybe 3 times. One of those times was Jean asking about taking a friend on as a sub. Lexi didn’t see anything wrong with it, as long as Dom and sub are able to separate friendship from the D/s relationship and keep an honest environment. Jean did his best to follow her advice.

“So c’mon, you’ve kept me waiting long enough. Tell me about him.” Lexi is bouncing excitably in her chair and scoots closer to lean her elbows on the table. 

“You’re not even gonna wait for me to get a drink first, jeez.” He’s hoping his words will hide the slight blush he can feel beginning to form over his cheeks.

“Oh, shush! You’ve barely told me anything about him and now you two are an item. I need details, spill.”

At that moment the waitress appears next to the table and takes their drink orders. 

Jean laughs at Lexi’s expectant face, “Alright, what do you want to know.”

“His name would be nice. You’ve kept him your mystery sub long enough.” 

“His name’s Eren.”

Lexi totally doesn’t miss the sweet smile that forms on Jean’s face when he says his name. “Oh my god, you’re completely smitten aren’t you.” Jean scoffs and bites the inside of his cheek, she can still read him like a book. “Ok, what does he look like?” She drops her chin in the palm of her hand.

Jean’s never really had to describe Eren before and he’s not sure how to start. He sighs, “Tall, dark, and handsome, except not really the tall part. He’s a few inches shorter than me. Bright eyes, green sometimes blue. And a smile that holds more mischief than mine ever did.”

“You always like the troublemakers.”

“I guess you rubbed off on me in that respect.” 

She reaches across the table to smack his hand but her smile is playful. “And things are working out well?”

“Yeah,” Jean rubs the back of his neck, “really well. Coming up on one year with him on the D/s side.”

Her eyebrows wiggle suggestively. “That’s exciting! You got anything special planned?”

He winces, “Not yet. still trying to come up with something.”

Lexi mockingly holds a hand over her heart and gasps. “You mean to tell me that Mr. Planner doesn’t have a plan yet? That’s very unlike you Jean.”

Jean rolls his eyes. “Yeah I know, but I want to do something we haven’t done before and we’ve done a lot.”

“Want some suggestions?”

“You got any?”

“Pfft, my gears are always turning.” She takes a sip of her water that the waitress places in front of her. “What about recreating your first scene but adding a twist?”

“I’ve done that.”

“Ok. What about sensory deprivation, tie him up, gag him, blindfold him and strap on some noise canceling headphones.”

“Hard limit, he doesn’t like losing his hearing.”

“Hmph.” She taps her lips. “What about the questionnaire?”

Jean’s eyes widen. “I forgot about that. Might not be a bad idea.”

“Can make a game out of giving him the questions too. Give him a sheet of paper like a written test, and watch him take it, make him sweat by walking around him with a wooden ruler.”

Jean probably won’t go that far but, that is still a good idea. Better than what he’s come up with so far. A familiar chime sounds from his pocket and he pulls out his phone. A text from Eren.

**E:** I’m free for lunch. What are you doing?

“Is that your boy?”

Jean looks up from the device in his hands. “Want to meet him?”

Lexi’s eyes light up. “Oh my gosh, yes yes yes! Get him down here.”

 **J:** Come to Bistro 104. Want you to meet someone.

Fifteen minutes later, the bells on the door signal another customer coming in. Jean sees Eren at the hostess stand, brushing water out of his hair, the shoulders of his sweatshirt soaked. Looks like he forgot his umbrella too. The blonde raises his hand to catch Eren’s attention and he gets a brilliant smile in return.

Lexi looks in the direction that has captured Jean’s attention. “Oh my god, Jean.” She’s openly gawking at Eren weaving through the other tables.

“Yeah, he has that effect on people.”

When Eren finally reaches the table he pulls out the spare chair and sits, removing his soaked sweatshirt. 

“Eren, this is Mistress Lexi.” He gestures to the woman next to him. “Lexi, Eren.”

Jean watches Eren turn on the charm in his smile as he reaches across the table to shake her hand. 

“Hi, nice to meet you.”

Lexi returns the handshake. “Jean, you’re description did not do him justice.”

A tint of pink colors Eren’s cheeks and he peeks over at Jean for…he’s not sure what.

“Well, I’d like to say I’ve heard a lot about you but this one over here has been determined to keep you a secret from me.” She points at Jean.

“I told you enough. Probably more that I should have.” Jean says the last part to himself but the other two both hear it.

The blonde may, or may not, have shared intimate details about Eren and their scenes together with Lexi. Normally when they swap stories, they have a rule to never mention names or any feature that could possibly disclose who they are, so Eren has been an anonymous sub until now. After Jean and Eren started dating though, Jean didn’t share a quarter of what he used to, which Lexi found understandable. This wasn’t done behind Eren’s back or anything. The brunette was well aware that Jean still talked with his former Domme and told her tales, and he fully trusted Jean’s discretion.

Eren smirks in Jean’s direction, “Yeah, he likes to keep a lot of secrets.”

Jean reaches for his glass of water on the table. “Last I checked you liked not knowing.” He counters Eren’s smirk with a cocky smile and raised brow.

“Ugh, you two just radiate sexual energy. I love it!”

The two boys look over at Lexi after her comment. She’s leaning forward into the table, completely engrossed in her new acquaintance. She’s always been a little forward, it’s part of her personality and why Jean likes her so much. And for knowing her for less than 5 minutes, Eren already likes her.

The waitress comes by shortly after Eren sits down to take their food orders and the three of them jump back into conversation. Most of it revolving around Eren because Lexi is nosy and wants to know about him. It’s never awkward and they share a lot of laughs (mostly at Jean’s expense). Lexi asks Eren all types of questions, some innocent, some not so much. She was intrigued to find out about his MMA skills.

“Finally someone who can keep this brat in line.” She eyes Jean, who has been quiet for most of the conversation. He’s been content to watch the two of them hit it off. Though her comment does get a reaction.

“Hey!”

Before he can say more, she looks back at Eren. “Have you tried to dominate him yet?”

“Ha! No. We’ve talked about it but…” the brunette shrugs with a shy, almost embarrassed, smile. He can’t fully admit to her that it’s him who isn’t ready for it. Jean knows this. He’s talked him through scene ideas that actually sound amazing and a lot of fun but, Eren doesn’t want control yet. 

Lexi doesn’t push, she’s got a knack for reading people (and Eren’s pretty damn easy to read most of the time) and she senses that she should back away from the topic.

“Well, when you do, just be prepared to deal with a brat who likes to mouth off.”

“Soo, he’ll be no different than he is normally?”

Her smile widens to show her teeth, “Oooo, he’s cheeky.” She nudges Jean’s arm with her elbow. 

Jean hums in agreement. “I told you, he’s more of a brat than I was.”

The three of them chat for over a hour and eventually their check arrives. Jean covers it. As he hands his card to the waitress Lexi announces her departure.

“Well, I need to get going.” She reaches for Eren after she’s stood and pulls him into a hug. “Eren it really was a pleasure to finally meet you. If you ever need anything, just get a hold of me.” She pulls out a card with her contact information. “And don’t let this one push you around too much.” She gives him a wink and turns to Jean.

“Talk to you soon?” he asks.

“Of course!” She pulls him close and whispers in his ear. “Be good to him, you hear me.” She pulls back to look into his eyes to tell him how serious she’s being about that comment.

“I will.” And he genuinely means it. 

Lexi pats his cheek and turns to leave. “You two enjoy the rest of your day.”

The two boys watch her leave, not surprised to see other eyes wander to watch her walk out the door. As soon as she is gone, Eren whips his head around to look back at Jean.

“I like her.”

Jean smiles and accepts the check back from the waitress to sign. “I knew you would.”

\- - - Few days later

Jean got put back on the late shift so he doesn’t need to be at work until 11am. That doesn’t mean he can sleep in, he’s still up with the sun. He goes for a morning run, showers, then wakes Eren up because he’s been known to hit the snooze button more than a few times. By the time Jean is dressed, Eren is more awake and crawling out of bed. The brunette shuffles around getting ready while Jean goes to the kitchen to eat. He is just pouring a bowl of cereal when Eren finally wanders in. He immediately goes for the freshly made coffee and fills his to-go mug. 

“Soo,” Eren starts. “What do people count as the beginning of a D/s relationship?”

Jean swallows his bite of food. “What do you mean?”

“Well, we’ve, um…” Jean watches, amused, as Eren pieces together words in his head. “It’s almost been a year, just wasn’t sure what you counted as the starting point.”

“I’d say the day we agreed to be Dom and sub. So that would have been, what, 2 days after the first trial scene?”

The brunette nods looking down into his coffee. He eventually lifts his eyes to meet Jean’s intrigued stare. “Do you celebrate that kind of thing?”

A slow, almost wicked, smile spreads across the blonde’s face. “You mean an anniversary?”

Eren huffs a laugh. “Yeah?”

“Most people do, don’t they?”

“Are we going to?” he bites on his lower lip. Eren wasn’t sure how Jean would react to the topic of an anniversary, but this is already going better and smoother than he expected.

“I have something in the works.”

“Is this another one of your surprises or am I allowed to know?”

Jean makes a vague gesture with his hands. “It’s kind of a surprise.”

Eren raises an eyebrow. “Kind of?”

The blonde takes a bite of his cereal, smiling while he chews. “You training with Levi tonight?”

“No,” he squints. “He moved it to tomorrow.”

Jean gets up from the table to put his bowl in the sink to wash later. “Then you’ll find out a little bit when you get home from work tonight.” 

“There’s nothing I can do to change your mind to tell me sooner?” Eren has a mischievous look in his eyes, a look that has trapped Jean many a time, but he’s not falling for it this morning.

“You can try anything you want but you aren’t going to get anything out of me.”

“You sure about that?” he goes to move in but Jean holds out an arm to keep Eren back.

“You’re gonna be late for work.”

Eren resorts to sticking out his tongue. “You’re no fun.”

\- - -

It’s later than Eren anticipated getting to Jean’s that night. His last class ran late thanks to his chatty adult students. They can be worse than the kids sometimes. When he lets himself into Jean’s apartment, the blonde is sitting at the dining table (that he never uses) writing in his Dom “journal”. It’s the very same notebook Jean took notes in the day they had the not-so-blind meet up. The blonde looks up when he hears Eren walk in, closing his notebook to hide the contents. What is written in the notebook is not really private per say. Eren has read some of it when Jean’s allowed him. Mostly it contains thoughts and ideas about scenes, some written out as vague bullet points, others are like detailed narrative walk throughs. Tonight though, it contains the surprise Eren is dying to know.

“Sit.” 

Eren drops his gym bag on the floor by the couch and sits adjacent to Jean at the table. “Well hi to you too.”

Jean chuckles, “Hi.” He spins the pen between his fingers. “So are you ready for the little hint I promised you this morning?”

Eren eagerly nods his head. He loves talking out scenes with Jean when they aren’t a surprise. Usually because they talk about it a day or two before and it usually leaves them feeling a little frisky, so it’s like getting a little sneak preview for the weekend, except Eren is usually the one who initiates it. 

A piece of paper is revealed under Jean’s journal and the blonde slides it across the table towards Eren. He looks down at what appears to be a blank piece of white paper. 

“What’s this?”

“You get to decide what we are going to do.” He watches the confusion form across the brunette’s features so he turns the sheet of paper over. “This is how you’re going to create the scene.”

Eren leans forward to take a closer look. It looks like a blank answer sheet to a test. 

“I made a series of questions, yes or no and multiple choice. You don’t get to know the question or the answer choices, but you still have to pick an answer.”

Call Eren intrigued. “What kind of questions are they?”

Jean smiles, relieved Eren seems interested. “There are questions asking what toys or props with be used and how. I made it so you can’t choose similar things. For example, you can’t pick both a crop and a paddle, you only get one. You determine everything I’ll do to you and how I do it.”

Eren looks at the first few questions—

**Question 1:** yes or no  
**Question 2:** yes or no  
**Question 3:** A__ B__ C__

There are 30 questions.

He smirks, “Can I borrow your pen?”

\- - - Another few days later

Tonight is not about romance. It’s not about cuddling and holding hands. There are no candles, roses or bottles of champagne. This isn’t a show about how much love one has for the other. It is simply a day to commemorate how they started, as Dom and sub. 

That’s not to say they didn’t find a way to celebrate. As an honor to their blind meet up lunch, Jean and Eren went out for a casual dinner in town. They toasted with their non-alcoholic drinks and quietly reminisced the early days of their relationship (granted it was only a year ago). Everything was low key and intimate in the way that there were no distractions, just the two of them. Surprisingly, the one thing they didn’t talk about was what awaited them back home.

Over the course of the last few nights, Jean went over the answers to Eren’s questionnaire and spun it into a scene. Due to the brunette’s choice on a particular question, the scene is still to remain a surprise. Eren complained about that. He felt since he picked what was going to be done to him, he should be able to know. And Jean’s only response—

“You chose not to know.” He can really be a smug bastard sometimes.

The sun is just setting by the time they get home from dinner. Jean unlocks the front door, holding it open for Eren behind him, and locks it for the evening. The brunette waits behind him like he use to do when they first started. Except, unlike when they started, when Jean turns to face him, there’s more than just a dominant air and lust filled eyes, there’s undeniable warmth and adoration. 

“You can go ahead. I’ll be there in a minute.” Jean leans forward and presses a light kiss to Eren’s cheek. The last gentle gesture for a while. 

Eren disappears around the corner, heading towards the bedroom. The blonde takes a second to himself, still by the front door, get his head in the right place. His keys get tossed in the basket he keeps on the table in the hall. He drapes his light coat over the chair in the living room as he passes. As Jean reaches the door to his bedroom, he leans against the jamb, watching Eren. He’s already put on his collar, the thick leather band hugging tight to his neck. Nimble fingers are loosening the belt around his waist, pulling it from the loops in his pants. It lands in the pile of clothes in front of the closet with a metallic clank. The brunette spots Jean in the doorway and holds his gaze as he undoes the button on his jeans and slides the zipper down. This has always been Jean’s favorite part since they’ve started, watching Eren, having him know he was being watched. Eren never tried to make a sexy show out of it, he removed his clothes like he normally did, but at a slower pace, it was one of the few ways he could tease Jean and get away with it. When the last piece of clothing gets tossed into the closet, Jean fully enters the room, and shuts the door behind him. 

A smug expression grows on Jean’s face as he walks past Eren to the toy dresser directly behind him. Eren hears the drawers opening, hears item after item being placed on the top of the dresser, but Jean is careful not to make any distinctive noises. 

“You ready to find out what you picked?” Jean takes the items in his hands and walks over to the bed to lay them out. 

“Ugh! Yes!” Eren feels like he’s going to burst he’s so ready to know.

“Come here.” 

The brunette turns his head to look back at Jean before his body follows to stand next to his Dom. 

“There anything here you don’t want?” Jean crosses his arms over his chest and leans his hip against the bed, reading the expressions on Eren’s face.

Blue-green eyes look over the items on the bed, biting his lip to keep his smile at bay. The lube and condom are a given at this point. Stretched out beside the tube are nipple clamps connected by a silver chain. Then there’s the tall linked leather cuffs that wrap around the forearm. And lastly, a dildo with a skinny vibe seen sticking out of the base. He’s all for that. 

“Everything’s good. Now the only mystery that remains is how you’re going to use them on me.” A playful smirk tugs at his lips.

“You’ll see.” Jean whispers the words as he passes by Eren. He heads to the light switch by the door and dims the lights a little bit so they aren’t so harshly bright. 

And, as always, “Safe words.”

The blonde takes slow steps back towards Eren as he rattles off his memorized response, looking over his body, running the plan through his head one last time.

Jean cups Eren’s jaw and pulls him forward and kisses him slowly, deeply, until he feels Eren press closer to him. The blonde can already tell Eren is going to be pliant for him and take what ever is given to him without much fight. Normally, Jean would push Eren until he talked back, but his obedience will work well for tonight’s plan. 

Their lips break apart but hover just breath away. The slender fingers on Eren’s jaw scratch at the light stubble from skipping a day of shaving. Jean’s hands smooth down his neck to his chest then fall away.

“Want to help me take these off?” With his chin, Jean gestures to himself and the clothes still covering his skin. He doesn’t let Eren undress him often, mostly because he likes the contrast of clothed, confident dominance and naked, willing submission. 

Eren seductively licks his bottom lip. “Yes, Sir.”

Just like when Eren undresses himself, he moves deliberately and unhurried. The blonde’s wearing a button down shirt with the top button already undone. Eren keeps his eyes on his hands, undoing the second button, the third, all the way down to the last button just below the waistband of Jean’s pants. Eren leans forward, pushing the fabric over pale shoulders and down his Dom’s arms. When the fabric bunches at the wrist, he attempts to lick at the exposed collar bones right in front of him. As soon as Jean feels his warm breath on his skin, he shuts him down.

“Just the clothes Eren.” His firm tone alone could have stopped Eren in his tracks. 

He backs off and tugs the shirt the rest of the way off Jean’s wrists and tosses it behind him. Their eyes lock as Eren kneels in front of him, lightly grabbing each of his ankles and removing his socks. The brunette sits up on his knees then, working the clasp of Jean’s pants and dragging his zipper down. Mischievous hands slide down the front of the pants on the tops of solid thighs, stopping at the knee and gliding back up on the sides to dangerously seductive hips. Fabric gets bunched in Eren’s fingers and then he pulls the pants down those long legs till they reach the floor. Jean steps out of the pant legs and Eren throws them in the pile of abandoned clothes. He looks at the remaining article of clothing, tight black boxer briefs, and reaches for the elastic waist only to be stopped, again.

“Those can stay on for now.” Eren pouts. “You’re gonna have to earn it.”

Jean hooks his fingers in the ring hanging from the collar and pulls it up, forcing Eren to stand back on his feet. Once he’s standing, the blonde the releases his hold on the ring and guides Eren backwards towards the bed until his thighs hit the mattress. He shoves Eren down by his shoulders to sit on the edge, knees bent over the corner of the mattress. The blonde is quick to straddle his lap and push against his chest to lay back, grabbing his wrists and pinning them above Eren’s head. Jean is careful not to allow their bodies to touch, the only contact between them is Jean’s hands on Eren’s wrists and his knees on either side of the brunette’s hips.

“So eager to please tonight aren’t you?” Jean releases his grip on Eren’s wrists, teasing his skin with light touches of his fingers all the way down his arms to his chest.

“I want to be good for you tonight.” Eren sighs when Jean starts kissing down his jaw. “Want to make sure you’re still going to keep me after this.”

Jean smiles into Eren’s neck, whispering, “I’ll keep you for as long as I can have you.”

Eren squirms in the sheets at those words spoken so close to his ear, not bothering to hide his wide smile as Jean works his mouth down his neck, over his collar, to the hollow of his throat. While his mouth teases Eren’s neck, Jean’s hands move up his chest, rubbing circles over his nipples with his thumbs. One hand falls away, quickly replaced by a hot mouth, licking the nub and gently pulling on it with his teeth. Eren groans deep in his throat, arching just the small of his back off the bed. Jean’s done this so many times but it never ceases to lose it’s effect of breaking Eren down, every so slowly wrapping his world in a foggy, pleasurable, haze.

He gives both nipples the same treatment before the blonde pulls back and reaches for the clamps beside him. Eren lifts his head, folding his arms beneath it for support, to watch Jean’s movements. He threads one of the clamps through the ring of the collar, letting the chain clank against the metal ring. Jean grips the chain and pulls Eren towards him so he has to support himself on his elbows, their lips just barely touching.

“Color?” His grip on the chain tightens, the links biting into his palm, and tugging Eren’s neck just a millimeter closer. 

With the tip of his tongue, Eren licks a quick stripe up the center of Jean’s lips, daring to smirk at his Dom on top of him. 

“Green” he purrs.

Giving no warning, or countdown, Jean lets the clamps bite into Eren’s skin. The brunette winces, hissing through his teeth at the pain, letting his head tilt back. That turned out not to be a good idea since the chain connecting the two clamps was put through the ring of his collar. By just that slight move back, the collar shifted up his neck, pulling on the chain and the clamps causing them to tighten around his nipple. 

“Ahh, shit, ok…ok” Eren reassures himself, righting his head back up. 

Jean sits back on Eren’s lap and watches in amusement. He meets Eren’s burning gaze straight on, leaning in to capture his lips again and lifting the ring of the collar just hear Eren gasp into his mouth. Guess Jean’s feeling a little more sadistic tonight. 

“Stand up.” The blonde backs off, keeping a single finger hooked on the collar, pulling Eren up off the bed, whimpering as he goes. 

Eren gets spun around so his back is to Jean and the front of his thighs are against the bed. Jean reaches for the arm restraints next and instructs Eren to fold his arms behind his back. The brunette shakes out his arms to get them loose before bringing his arms behind him and gripping his elbows. The cuffs get buckled one at a time around his forearms, gripping enough that they won’t slide on his arms. The tiny chain between them, only an inch or two long keeps his arms in place. Jean closes the space between them, chest to back, licking behind Eren’s ear and splaying his hands over his abdomen. While one hand moves up, the other goes down following the dark line of hair to Eren’s cock, hard and already flushed red. 

“Color?” 

Jean’s words are hot in Eren’s ear. The brunette leans his head back on Jean’s shoulder, moaning from the tug of the chain and the slow, firm pull of Jean’s fingers on his cock. A single finger teasing the sensitive spot just under the head, small, short strokes. Eren’s answer gets caught in his throat and the only sound to come out of his mouth is a low filthy moan next to Jean’s ear. That sound sends a wave of heat down the blonde’s body, straight to his core, fanning the flames that are already burning his insides.

“Need to give me a color Eren or this is all you’ll get.” 

“ _Gr—ngh_ —green.” He’s already close to breathless.

“You’re doing so good for me. You gonna be able to keep that up? You going to behave for me?”

Jean’s pretty sure over the year they’ve been together, Eren has developed a tiny praise kink. His body will go limp, barely for a second, when Jean praises him. And someday, unfortunately not today, the blonde plans on testing to see how far he can take Eren’s possible new kink. 

“Mhmm, yes Sir.”

“Good. Now bend over.” With quick movements Jean removes his hands from Eren’s front, one going to grip the muscle connecting Eren’s neck and shoulder and the other coming down hard on his sub’s ass with a stinging slap.

Eren moans loudly again when the hand gropes harshly at the tingling skin. “Can I have another one, Sir?”

“If you bend over I’ll give you three.”

Without hesitating, Eren bends at the waist, lowering his torso down on to the mattress, groaning when he puts pressure on the clamps still attached to his nipples. Always so greedy, wanting more. So Jean gives him four just for good measure.

When his ass is pink and still burning with the residual sting of each slap, Eren hears the pop of the lube cap. Semi-cold lubed slicked fingers wet the skin around his entrance, smoothing the muscle and getting it to relax. He hears a telling hitch in Jean’s breathing.

“Green! Bright _fucking_ green.” he moans.

Jean snickers under his breath and thrusts in one finger. His hole is tight and hot around his finger, gently pushing and pulling, in and out, each time getting one knuckle deeper. Eren tries to push his hips back but finds that hard to do in this position without the help of his arms to keep his upper body from dragging. All he can do is moan and whisper “please” over and over into the sheets. Eventually he gets what he asked for, and Jean sneaks in a second finger to work him open. Still a teasing pace, sliding in and scissoring his fingers as he pulls out. Eren whines as Jean leaves him empty to prep the next toy. Thank god he was quick about it. He wraps the toy in the condom, slicks it up with lube and runs the length of it over Eren’s hole. 

“Ready?” Jean sees Eren deflate, relaxing fully on the bed.

“Yes, Sir.” he sighs.

Eren bites down on the bunched up sheets near his mouth as Jean eases in the dildo. It’s not as thick as some other toys, or even Jean’s cock, but it still stretches his hole as it goes in. Jean doesn’t wait for him to adjust and starts an even rhythm thrust with the toy, keeping the thrusts short and slow. Not long after, the thrusts become longer, Jean dragging almost the whole length of the toy out until just the tip is in before pushing it back in. It’s a painstakingly slow torture for Eren who just wants to be rammed by the toy over and over until he comes. He should know by now that he won’t get what he wants right away, but his patience, or lack there of, doesn’t let him see that. 

However, Jean seems to have all the patience in the world when it comes to torturing Eren like this. Loves watching Eren writhe beneath him, taking everything he gives him so perfectly. Is it wrong to think Eren is gorgeous when he’s like this, wound up and desperate for more? It’s one of the many reasons why Jean got sucked into him, seeing someone as strong as Eren, body and mind, just fall apart and try to claw out of their skin to feel more, to get higher. Jean will never get sick of it. 

The pleasured scream he gets out of Eren when he thrusts the toy in hard, hitting his sweet spot, with the vibe now on high, is totally worth the slow build up. Each moan and whine that spills from his mouth gets Jean to work the toy faster and harder until the noises drip out silently on a choked up scream. Eren’s completely gone, nothing but babbling gibberish and harshly whispered swears come out of his mouth. Right as he’s about to go off the edge and reach his climax, Jean reaches through his legs and forms a tight grip on the base of his cock, turns off the vibe and pulls the toy out. The brunette growls around the sheets in his teeth.

“ _Fuck! No no no no nooo. Please!_ ” 

Jean reaches for Eren’s hair, getting a firm grasp and pulls him upright off the bed swearing loudly.

“You don’t get to come first tonight.” he says in his ear, the grip in Eren’s hair loosening. “First me, and then you.”

Before Eren can answer, Jean tugs the nipple clamps off one at a time and waits. The pain for the circulation coming back hits just after a few seconds. Eren’s shoulders hunch forward and his hands tighten into fists.

“Ah! _Shit!_ ” he hisses.

While he’s catching his breath, Jean pulls the chain out of the ring on Eren’s collar and tosses the clamps back on the bed. He rubs soothing circles on his back and then spins him around so they are facing each other. 

“Tell me when you’re good.” 

Eren nods his head, takes a deep breath and exhales. “I’m good, Sir.” 

He manages a small smirk so Jean takes that as the go ahead.

“Get on your knees.”

“Finally,” the brunette whispers. 

He drops down eagerly and scoots closer to his Dom’s feet. At first, if Eren is completely honest with himself, he was intimidated to suck Jean’s cock when they first started. Jean is always so sinfully good with his tongue and he can deep throat a guy like it was his job. But Eren, he didn’t think he was bad at it, he was just different. Eren is wet, sloppy, and for past partners, he used too much teeth. Then there’s Jean, who is the kinky fuck who asked him to use more. He likes how messy Eren is, how passionate he gets when he sucks him off. Like with most sexual things, Eren doesn’t tease, he goes for it.

The brunette starts at the base, licking and kissing up to the tip until the shaft is thoroughly wet with saliva and precome. He’ll suck on the head, teasing the slit with the tip of tongue and pulls off with a purposeful pop. Sometimes his lips will travel out to Jean’s hip bones and leave a trail of kisses and bruises back to his cock. Eren has learned how to swallow his cock but he has to work up to it every time, slowly bobbing his head taking in as much as he can until his nose brushes the hairs at the base of the shaft. And if he’s in the right mood, like tonight, he’ll allow Jean to grip his hair tight to keep his head still as he thrusts his hips. When Jean’s close he slows down and Eren takes over again, hollowing his cheeks and pulling off, letting his teeth scrape the sensitive skin on the head. Eren is more than willing to finish him off with his mouth but the blonde finishes himself off, the sight of Eren below him with his mouth open wide pushing him over the edge. He ends up with Jean’s mess on his chin and neck and Jean swears Eren is sexy as hell when he’s wrecked and a mess.

Eren licks at his lips, a pleased smile on his face. Jean tucks himself back in his briefs and reaches a hand out to scratch behind Eren’s ear. He closes his eyes and leans into Jean’s touch, nuzzling into his hand. It almost breaks Jean’s heart to have to do this to him. Almost.

“I lied to you.” Eren peaks one eye open to look up at him. “You’re not allowed to come tonight.”

“What?” The submissive facade cracks and Eren jerks away from the pleasant scratching. “You’re kidding right?”

Jean shakes his head. “Nope.”

Eren looks down at himself, his cock furiously red, and not even a few minutes ago, he was seconds away from orgasm. “What the fu—“

“I’m going to make you a deal though.” He waits to make sure Eren is listening intently and kneels in front of him on the floor. “If you can make it through a week without getting off, just one week, I’ll reward you with whatever you want, in or out of scene.” Eren opens his mouth to say something but Jean cuts him off by holding up a finger to silence him. “But, if you touch yourself, or attempt to get off in anyway, you get nothing. No sex and no scenes for one month.”

The brunette bites down hard on his lower lip and whines. He hangs his head and admits defeat. “Ok, fine.” 

He looks back at Jean with a challenging stare. It’s on.

“And just so you know,” He runs a finger up the vein on the underside of Eren’s cock. “I’m not gonna go easy on you.”

 

_…to be continued._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jean is so mean, poor Eren :(
> 
> Hopefully it won't take me as long to post part 2. I can't make any promises though.


	16. Late April, Year One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the end of a very long and frustrating week. D/s anniversary part 2!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it goes, part two! I’m pretty sure this is the longest chapter I’ve written and quite possibly the smuttiest. Enjoy! 
> 
>  
> 
> I put more notes at the end, btw :)

_“I’m not gonna go easy on you.”_

Eren lets those words sink in during the light after care. He still hasn’t moved from his spot kneeling on the floor but Jean removed the arm restraints and has started to massage each arm. Every touch is soothing, helping Eren calm down just a little bit, though his hard on is still at attention. 

Despite the warning, Jean is being nice to him right now. As fun as it is to get Eren all worked up, he doesn’t want to set him up to fail either. His punishment, if he breaks the rules, affects him too. If Eren gets no sex, Jean gets no sex. So he’s giving him the chance to collect himself now and prepare for the week ahead. The sweet torture will start soon.

Warm arms wrap around Eren’s waist and the blonde places light kisses across the back of his shoulders. 

Jean asks, “You good?”

_Not really_ , Eren thinks to himself. “I’m going to go take a cold shower.”

The brunette pouts all the way to the bathroom and Jean watches him disappear behind the door. He knows Eren is just a little bit mad at him for not letting him come during the scene, but he knows he’ll get over it quickly enough and will take the challenge head on. 

He does feel a little bad when he hears Eren curse loudly behind the bathroom door. Must have just gotten under the cold spray. Poor boy.

\- - -

Come Sunday morning, the very next day, Jean was true to his word. And each day got progressively tougher to block him out. Half of the things he did weren’t even on purpose! That’s what bothered Eren. Jean was torturing him without even trying. Like coming home after a run, shirtless, sweaty and panting. Or being really domestic folding laundry and bending over to grab something out of the dryer and he always wears flattering pants. Oh god! But when he was actually trying…Eren is surprised he didn’t explode.

First thing Eren sees when he wakes up Monday morning is Jean’s lace panty covered ass sliding into his nice pants for work. His back was facing Eren and he didn’t turn to face him till he was finished dressing and was heading for the door. He smirked back at the brunette who was still just sitting in bed, dumbfounded and a little aroused. Now one would think, it was just a peek, right? He covered himself up so all should be good. Nope! All day Eren thought about it. Just knowing that under that one layer of clothing, tight lace is imprinting designs onto Jean’s skin and all Eren wants to do is add his own marks over top of them. 

Any chance Jean got, he’d touch Eren. A light graze on the back of his neck in passing. Standing behind him, slipping his hands under the hem of his shirt to tease the skin above his pant’s waistband. Kissing any part of his body that was close enough to reach.

And let’s talk about the _two_ times Eren caught Jean masturbating. He did it on purpose during the times that he knew Eren would be coming home. First time he was on the bed with just his hand and a vibe up his ass. Second time, he was in the shower, moans bouncing off the tiles. Both times, he asked Eren if he wanted to watch. What kind of question is that!? Of course he wants to watch! He wants to fucking join in and help, but as soon as he feels that wave of heat run south, he turns abruptly out of the room spouting off a colorful string of curses. 

The blonde was driving him insane. 

\- - -

By Friday, Eren was a mess. Any down time he had between classes he took his frustration out on a heavy bag. 

That night he arrives at Jean’s exhausted and too tired to try to put up with Jean’s antics. For once, Eren is grateful Jean brought work home with him, tapping away at his computer for an hour before he came out of his office to greet Eren. Jean seems to be on the same exhaustion level as Eren because five minutes after collapsing into his arm chair he asks Eren if he’s ready for bed. 

Eren crawls into bed first, lying on his side close to the edge. Over the past few days he’s made a habit of sleeping as far away from Jean as possible without falling off the bed. Tonight is no exception. When Jean comes out of the bathroom he laughs to himself and climbs up on the bed and snuggles up close to Eren, giving him an affectionate kiss on his shoulder. 

“You’re almost through the last day. Then all you have to do is make it through your morning class and your home free.” Jean says.

Eren hums to acknowledge he’s heard him.

“You’ve been so good for me, Eren.” He wraps his arm around the brunette’s waist and kisses the back of his neck. “You’ve done really well. And I’m going to make sure tomorrow is worth your while.”

Jean’s been doing this all week too. At the end of each day, lying in bed, he’d encourage Eren with words of praise. Saying how good he did that day, that he made it through another day, he only had X number of days left. Or his favorite, I love you, whispered over and over into his skin.

He liked hearing him say those things, melted into his light touch and was lulled to sleep by positive thoughts. 

\- - -

**Saturday**

Eren could barely focus during his class, thankfully Mikasa offered to assist him today since this was one of his bigger classes. He felt bad not giving the kids his full attention but his mind was else where. All his mind could focus on was the clock and the countdown to how long it would take from that moment to walking through Jean’s front door. 

When the class was over and he was free to go for the rest of the day he had to force himself to calmly walk to the locker room, take a shower, get dressed and get out of there without Mikasa asking him questions about his behavior the past few days. 

He drives to Jean’s on autopilot, not really having to think because he’s driven this route so many times for the past year. So many ideas where flashing through his head. Maybe, too many ideas. To be totally honest he has no clue what he’s going to do with Jean when he gets there. Might end up just jumping him where he’s standing, no matter where he’s standing, and fuck him right there on the floor. Or have Jean fuck him. Eren groans with frustration. He can’t decide! And each number change on his dashboard clock seems to drag out longer than usual. 

His brain zones back in when he pulls into the apartment complex. He can feel his pulse quicken, adrenaline pumping through his system. It’s been a long god damn week and he is so ready for this, even though he has no plan. Guess improvisation is the way to go. 

The apartment is quiet when he walks in, just the hum of the washing machine and sounds of sifting paper greet him. Jean’s there, leaning against the arm rest of the couch, with what looks like a pile of mail under his arm, eyes intently reading a packet of papers in his hands. Eren attempts to be quiet as he approaches, toeing off his shoes by the door and gently dropping his gym bag on the floor in the hallway. Jean doesn’t notice him till it’s too late and the brunette is right in front of him. 

Without warning, Eren pushes Jean back over the arm rest, flopping back onto the couch, the pile of papers in his hands fly and scatter to the floor. Eren crawls over him, hands and knees on either side of his body as the blonde scoots further onto the couch. When he’s comfortable, Jean bends his arms behind his head and watches each movement of the animal on top of him. Eren runs his hands over the blonde’s stomach, his chest, one hand slides up the side to pull Jean’s arms from behind his head and pins his wrists together above him. The other hand continues further up his chest, when the tips of Eren’s fingers reach the hollow of his throat, Jean tilts his head back, allowing better access. Eren’s hand curves around the side of the blonde’s neck, thumb stroking over his windpipe, feeling every time the blonde swallows. He can feel Jean’s pulse under his hand, calm, steady beats compared to Eren’s which is increasing every second now that he has a warm, lithe, body beneath him. On an upward stroke of his thumb, Jean tilts his head back down to capture it between his teeth. His deft tongue licks the pad of his thumb and his lips wrap around it sucking it further into his wet mouth. Eren's grip tightens around Jean’s wrists and his thumb is released with a sensual lick. 

“This all you need to get off now, me sucking on your fingers?” Jean tries to contain his smirk but it still successfully pulls at his lips. 

Eren doesn’t want to admit it out loud, but yeah, he could probably come just from having his fingers in Jean’s mouth. He can feel the body shift beneath him. Jean lifts his leg, pressing his knee into Eren’s crotch. The brunette bites his bottom lip hard to contain the moan that wants to escape and squeezes his eyes shut.

“Tell me what you want Eren.” he coos. 

Even though Eren is physically on top of Jean and has him pinned to the couch with his hand around his throat, Jean still has control.

“If you don’t tell me I can’t do anything.” the blonde is teasing him, getting him all riled up. It’s clear to see he’s succeeding.

Eren feels like his head is spinning. He doesn’t know what he wants. Well that’s not entirely true, he wants a lot of things, but he can’t decide.

“ _Fuck._ ” Eren let’s go of Jean’s wrists, bracing his arm on the edge of the couch. He growls, frustrated, “I just want _you_.”

“Yeah?” Jean snakes one of his arms around Eren’s shoulder, burying his hand in his hair, gripping tight. He leans up, licking a stripe up the side of Eren’s neck up to his ear. “How bad do you want me?”

Jean doesn’t need an answer. Just by looking at Eren he can see he has sufficiently antagonized the beast in his cage. And he’s rabidly scratching to get out.

The next thing he knows, Jean’s being thrown over Eren’s shoulder and carried back to the bedroom. As soon as he’s flung on to the bed, Eren engulfs his body, capturing his lips in a bruising kiss and grinding their hips together. Eren tells himself that’s a dangerous idea, he already feels the coil tightening in his gut and they haven’t even gotten past the foreplay. Jean’s warmth is so inviting, his thighs on either side of Eren’s hips spread wide for the hard body between them. One hand on the back of his head, keeping his lips close, the other sneaking its way to his ass to force him to grind down harder. When Jean bites down hard on Eren’s full bottom lip, the brunette pulls back slightly to catch his breath and stills the movement of his hips. It’s clear to see he’s struggling trying to control himself, but Jean doesn’t want him the rein the beast in yet.

“I have an idea.” 

Eren groans and tucks his face into the crook of Jean’s neck. He feels him move, reaching for something under the pillows beside them. 

Jean lightly scratches at the base of Eren’s skull, talking gently into his ear. “I’ll let you decide who has what.”

It takes a second, but Eren peaks at what Jean is holding in his hand, his favorite silicone plug and remote. 

Eren melts on top of Jean, hiding his face again, and completely ignoring the possibility that the full weight of his body could probably crush Jean. But the blonde only snickers. 

“Which one do you want?” He nuzzles into the dark mess of hair, trying to coax Eren back out of hiding. He doesn’t want to give the beast inside too much time to calm down.

In one quick motion, Eren sits up and pulls his shirt off over his head. “Give me the plug.” 

He couldn’t decide if he wanted to fuck or be fucked so now he gets a bit of both…at the same time. Excited hands work the button and zipper on Jean’s pants open. He lifts his hips so Eren can peel the offending fabrics down his legs and he violently throws them across the room, falling into a lump on the floor when they hit the wall. While Eren’s busy trying to get his own pants off, Jean twists and reaches for the drawer in the end table for the lube and condoms. He doesn’t even get the chance to close the drawer before Eren grabs his waist and drags him back. He’s quick to pull the blonde’s shirt off, licking and biting on his collar bones, working his way higher back to his lips. The kiss isn’t as frantic and rushed as it was before but it’s still heated and passionate, dizzying. 

Jean is loving this. He’s so used to being in control but every once in while he just wants to be savagely ravished and getting Eren like this is rare. Sure they do it rough pretty often but not like this. Like this, Eren seems to act instinctively, truly like an animal, and is more apt to manhandle Jean how he sees fit. But before Eren gets to that point, he needs to get ready for this plug, then all the fun can begin.

The brunette scoots on his knees until he’s practically sitting on Jean’s chest. He braces his arms on either side of the blonde’s head while Jean reaches between them with lube slick fingers. He’s nice enough not to tease Eren too bad and works him open enough to slide the plug in place. Eren feels like a coiled spring just waiting to unravel. There’s no way he’ll last long and hopefully he won’t be embarrassingly quick. 

Jean unwraps the condom foil and puts it on for Eren who’s hands were too busy fisting the sheets. The excess lube gets wiped on the sheets and Jean smooths his hands up and down the brunette’s thighs.

“C’mon,” the blonde urges.

Jean flicks the on button on the remote, set to a medium setting, for only a second. Eren practically growls when he feels the plug begin to vibrate, giving Jean a heated glare. The blonde only wiggles his eyebrows suggestively in return. 

Eren shuffles back down his body, once again kneeling between Jean’s thighs. He bends his knees on either side of him, just waiting for Eren to make his move. The brunette reaches for the lube covering several of his fingers before putting his hand between Jean’s legs. Eren reaches to prep him but feels the head of a plastic plug in the way.

He seethes, “Oh, fuck you.”

Jean grins wide back at him, “That’s the plan.”

He had it all planned out. 

To Eren, there are times when it seems like they are playing a game of chess. Making moves and counter moves around each other in their sexual games. Then there are times when Eren realizes he has been playing checkers while Jean has been playing chess. He never stood a chance.

Since Jean got the questionnaire back from Eren he’s planned this out. He knows every button the brunette has, and how hard to push each of them. He knew Eren could last a week, no matter how hard he thought it would be, he knew he could do it. In retrospect, a week is a pretty short time. He knows Doms who’ve made their subs go longer and wear chastity devices. Hell, Lexi made him go two weeks, that was difficult. But for Eren, the week was a gift, a very long and drawn out gift. He pushed certain buttons all week to get him to this point today. There are certain things Eren likes that make him want to top and then there are things that make him want to bottom. And every day this past week, Jean’s done everything to make him want to top. 

Maybe Eren hasn’t realized it yet or maybe he has, but one of Jean’s strongest skill set in his Dom repertoire is manipulation. He never uses it maliciously, it’s only ever used during their game. He can get almost anyone wrapped around his finger and make them think everything was their idea. He’s good that way, never giving himself away and still getting what he wants. 

And right now, Eren’s going to give him exactly that.

He’s already removed the plug and working three figures inside him that have Jean purring under him. He doesn’t spend too much time since he’d had the plug in for a while. Eren pours more lube in his hands to slick up his cock before he inches closer to line up at Jean’s hole. Jean’s only encouragement is another quick flick of the on button on the remote. That’s when Eren decides to change tactics. 

Eren grabs Jean’s hips, twists them so he’s lying on his right side and his left leg is in the air, braced against Eren’s left shoulder. He eases his cock past the blonde’s first ring of muscle and Jean hisses into the sheets. The brunette stays still, mostly for his own benefit. After a few moments, Jean rolls his hips, as best he can in his position.

“Ready when you are.”

Eren eyes the remote in Jean’s hand, his thumb already in position over the on button, just waiting. He’s got seconds to decide, go slow, or go fast. Who’s he kidding, the choice is easy. He’s been waiting all week to make Jean scream, ever since he saw that quick peek of lace on Monday. 

Jean watches a feral smile take over Eren’s face and feels the grip on his waist and calf tighten. They keep their heated eye contact as Eren slowly pulls out and then thrusts his hips forward hard and fast. He pounds into him in a furious rhythm, skin smacking together and moans of pleasure drip from both their mouths. The plug in Eren’s ass starts humming away at a low setting and every twist and thrust of his hips has him crying out. Any time the setting gets higher, he goes harder and faster and Jean is losing his mind in his own ecstasy. He keeps setting the notch higher and higher and let’s just say Jean doesn’t plan on walking straight for the rest of the weekend. 

They’re both close, Eren maybe more so. He’s honestly surprised he’s lasted this long but, fuck, it feels so good. Jean lets his leg fall when Eren leans forward pressing his forehead to the blonde’s shoulder. Strings of curses and Jean’s name fall from his lips like a whispered prayer and what kind of person would Jean be if he didn’t answer them. 

Eren can’t contain his scream when Jean sets the plug on high and his hips frantically keep thrusting even when his orgasm hits him. When he comes it sounds like a broken sob, utterly wrecked and so well deserved. Jean turns the plug off and starts fisting his own cock in time with the last of Eren’s thrusts and comes over his hand with a drawn out moan. 

“ _Ngh, fuck_.” Eren whispers the words against the skin of the blonde’s shoulder, panting trying to catch his breath. 

Jean actually manages to laugh lightly when Eren eases out and collapses on his side behind him. He rolls over to face him, tangling their legs together and brushing the hair away from his face. When it appears the brunette is coming down from his high, Jean leans in and kisses him once, twice, the second time Eren actually puts in effort to kiss him back. 

“Hey.” Eren smiles sweetly at him. The beast is back in its cage.

“Hi.” Jean continues to stroke through Eren’s hair. “Feel better?”

The brunette only nods, his eyes slowly blinking. Jean can’t help but smile back at his wiped out partner. 

“You need a minute?” he teases.

Eren snuggles his head into the blanket. “Give me, like, ten.”

The blonde laughs through his nose. “Ok.”

He stays with him, tangled in their mess. Eren’s adrenaline is basically gone and his body just needs a little rest, but he doesn’t actually feel tired. He stays still long enough to get his breathing back to a steady pace and also to get the feeling back in his legs. 

At the end of the ten minutes, Jean eases Eren onto his back and straddles his waist. He kisses up his neck and gently bites down on Eren’s earlobe causing him to whine softly. Eren can practically feel the smirk on Jean’s lips.

“Want to see how many times I can get you to come today?”

There’s such a dark quality to his voice when he speaks, so seductive and alluring. Eren just can’t say no when Jean talks like that.

Jean manages to lure Eren to the shower, steaming up the small window and mirrors in the room with the hot water. Within five minutes he had Eren speaking in tongues just by finger fucking him against the tiles. Orgasm number two. 

After Eren is sated and both are clean, the brunette insists on a little nap. He told Jean that if he’s going to keep up with him, then he needs just 30…maybe 45 minutes. Eren curls up in bed, naked and still a little damp from the shower. He is asleep within minutes. As much as Jean would love to join Eren in his nap, he won’t sleep tonight if he does.

So while Eren is out of commission temporarily, Jean wraps the gift he got for him. He would have given it to him last weekend but it wasn’t ready yet. He just picked it up two days ago but hasn’t found the time to wrap it because Eren was around. There are some shiny black gift boxes he’s stashed away in his office closet (the kink shop has really nice gift boxes, so he keeps them) and he picked up some teal ribbon today after breakfast with Marco. His gift fits nicely into one of the smaller square boxes and he had just enough ribbon to wrap it around the box and tie it off in a bow. 

The box is left in sight on the coffee table in the living room. Jean will give it to Eren when he wakes up. While he has the time, he takes care of the laundry he started when he got home and picks up the mail he dropped when Eren tackled him. He tosses all the junk mail and places the bills in a tray he keeps in his office. Walking out of the office his eyes glance over to his bedroom door. Jean looks back at the clock in the room. It’s been 25 minutes, he still has about 15 minutes before he should wake Eren up. He wastes most of that time straightening his apartment which for the most part is already pretty neat and clean, but it works as a distraction.

When he goes back to the bedroom he pauses in the doorway. Eren is curled up on his side in the middle of the bed, sheet only draped over his hips and one of his legs. Jean can’t help but to stare for a few minutes at the boy in his bed. To think that this time a year ago he had everything to learn about him, as far as being a sub. They only went as far as they were comfortable with going. Now it’s like the sky is the limit and Jean wants to absolutely spoil him rotten, wants to give him anything he asks for D/s wise. And maybe he’s turning into a bit more of a sap because he wishes he could give Eren everything. He’s such a simple person though and doesn’t ask for much. That is partly why Jean wants to spoil him today, because he wouldn’t have asked for it. 

Jean tip toes over to the bed and crawls up behind Eren to spoon. His fingertips dance over Eren’s skin, a touch light enough that the brunette doesn’t even stir. He wraps his arm around his waist, fingers teasingly brushing the skin just under his navel. Eren is slowly coaxed awake with kisses on his neck and shoulders and the general warmth of the shirtless body pressed against him. When he’s awake he hums happily, Jean can feel the vibration in his own chest. Jean pauses his kisses when Eren takes his hand from his waist and kisses his palm. Sweet gestures like that still get to him, make his heart beat faster and bring an embarrassed blush to his cheeks. But the sweet gesture is quick to pass after Eren nips at his fingers. 

The brunette rolls over on to his back, looking slightly up at Jean who’s propped up on his elbow. Gently, Jean detangles his fingers from Eren’s and begins walking his fingers slowly down Eren’s torso. Jean’s eyes follows his fingers trek downwards while Eren can’t seem to look away from the blonde’s face. His touch is feather light but each brush of his fingers scorches Eren’s skin, leaving trails of tingling embers behind. 

As his fingers walk lower, the corners of Jean’s mouth curl, fully aware of Eren’s eyes on him. Eventually, his fingers reach the sheet draped over Eren’s waist, that fiery gaze looks back up. His fingers don’t stop their journey south, they continue lower until they find what they are after.

Eren’s body writhes lazily as Jean takes a firm hold on him and mouths along his jawline. Eren chases after his lips, worming his hands up to cup Jean’s face and bring his lips down on his own. It’s a slow slide of tongues, an intimate exchange of silent words passed between their mouths. Small gasps and low moans escape in the space between their lips as Eren starts moving his hips, beginning short and slow thrusts into Jean’s hand. He’s keeping the pace a torturously slow speed, getting Eren’s head clouded in nothing but sensation.

Jean shifts his body, his lips leaving Eren’s to move lower, down his jaw, neck, chest and stomach. His free hand pulls the sheet over Eren away revealing his flushed, leaking cock. The blonde kneels beside him bringing his mouth lower to swirl his tongue over the head. Eren is torn between continuing to watch Jean or letting his eyes roll back and sink into the bed while riding out each wave of pleasure. For a few moments, Eren can’t look away, watching and feeling his length getting wrapped in the wet warmth of Jean’s mouth. Feeling his tongue press against him in all the right places. Watching his cheeks hollow when he pulls up or seeing the skin of his cheek extend when he moves his cock around in his mouth. Jean swallows around him and Eren can’t take watching him anymore, he’s so close as it is. One hand grabs for the sheets and the other tangles its fingers in the blonde hair on the top of Jean’s head. He squeezes his fists tight and Jean moans around him.

“ _J-Jean_..fuck.” Eren moans his warning.

The blonde doesn’t stop. He keeps going till Eren is gasping for air and his release spills into Jean’s mouth and down his throat. Orgasm number three.

Jean looks up at Eren after he’s pulled off, his armed draped over his eyes, hiding in the crook of his elbow. Eren can feel the blonde lie down beside him, close so there’s no space between them. He’s knows Jean is looking at him, waiting for him to come out from hiding. It’s hard to look at him though. Sometimes Eren still gets embarrassed after moments like they’ve just had. A passionate, quiet moment that feels too intimate to fully comprehend until it’s over. And Jean just finds it entertaining when he can get Eren as flustered as this. 

“Stop hiding.” Jean laughs and playfully pinches at Eren’s side.

Eren huffs and pulls his arm away, staring at the ceiling before he dares to look back at Jean, who’s giving him a knowing smile. He’s on his stomach, propped up on his elbows, his chin in one of his hands.

“Shut up.” Eren turns on his side facing the blonde but hides half his face in Jean’s pillow.

Jean’s smile only widens. It’s funny how right now Eren is being really adorable when about 2 hours ago he was a raging sexual beast. He can flip like a switch.

“Would you do this every time you make me wait a week?” Eren asks.

“Do what?”

“Ugh! I hate it when you that.” Jean can see Eren smiling into the pillow.

“You really need to start being more specific.”

Eren use to have a tendency to speak vaguely when they talked about sex. He had never had a partner who was so open about it like Jean. Since the two of them have been together he’s gotten much better at talking about it, but occasionally Jean will still catch him and tease him.

“And you are an asshole.”

Jean laughs. “I’ve gotten you off 3 times already and _I’m_ the asshole?”

Eren nods his head.

“Unbelievable.” He pretends to be offended and looks away from Eren momentarily but turns back when he feels an arm drape over his waist. 

Eren gives him a cheeky smile. “So would you?” 

“I can’t promise it would be exactly like this, but yeah. After a week, or more, you’d deserve a nice reward.”

The brunette squints when he hears “or more” but figures he’ll just beg Jean if he ever gets there. 

“Can we continue today’s reward after some food, go for round 4?”

Jean quirks an eyebrow. “Yeah? You up for that?”

Eren hums and shifts back onto his back, stretching his arms up over his head, practically putting himself out on display. “Mmm, you may have made me come 3 times already but _you_ haven’t fucked _me_ yet.”

“Well then, we’ll have to remedy that.” The springs in the bed whine as he gets off the bed. “Come on, I’ve got something for ya. And put some pants on.”

He does as he’s told, and Eren follows Jean out into the living room. 

Almost instantly, Eren notices the box sitting on the coffee table. The shiny black box and teal ribbon stick out against the wood grain, it would have been hard not to notice it. Jean is already seated on the couch and watches Eren as he takes a detour into the entry hallway to grab something from his gym bag. He comes back to sit on the couch with two wrapped boxes in his hands, both the same size, and places them on the table next to his gift. Eren’s boxes are wrapped in a rich red paper. 

Jean eyes the two boxes. “You trying to out do me now by giving two gifts?”

“They go together, therefore they count as one.” Eren laughs.

“Fine.” The blonde reaches for the black box and hands it to Eren. “For you.”

He regards Eren as he pulls on the tail of the ribbon, undoing the bow and unraveling it around the box. The brunette pauses before he lifts the lid off the top. 

Coiled inside, sitting on top of a piece of foam, is a thin braided leather necklace with a single stainless steel cylindrical bead in the middle. Very skinny rich brown and black leather strips make up the braid, tightly woven and clearly well made. It hits Eren that this isn’t something you can find in a store, Jean had this made for him.

“Thought you could wear this as an every day collar if you wanted to. It’s not as obvious as the one you already have but I didn’t think you’d mind something a little more subtle.” Jean explains.

Eren is beyond words as he takes the necklace out of the box and runs it through his fingers. The leather is still smooth and soft, a nice contrast to the metal bead in the middle. 

For Eren, and most likely Jean, this necklace feels more meaningful than the leather collar he already has. That one was just an impulse buy, another toy to add to the collection. But this, this means so much more. This is Jean asking Eren to be his, to fully belong to him as his D/s partner. This is Jean asking him to accept him back, that by wearing this necklace Eren doesn’t just belong to him, Jean belongs to Eren as well. It connects them both. 

He meant what he said last weekend in the beginning of their scene. Eren wants Jean to keep him. Not just as his sub, but also as a partner. And this thing in his hand tells him Jean meant what he said too, that he’ll keep him as long as Eren will have him, that he’s serious about both sides of their relationship. 

Jean’s eyebrows raise when Eren hands the necklace over to him delicately.

“Can you put it on for me?” 

Relieved, Jean laughs lightly at himself and takes the necklace from Eren as he turns around. With shaky hands, Jean opens the back clasp and secures the necklace around Eren’s neck. He admires his gift as Eren turns back around, the dark colors stand out against his skin and the metal bead sits perfectly in the hollow of his throat. 

Eren leans forward, their noses just barely touching. “Thank you.”

Jean smiles into their kiss and cups the brunette’s face, thumb gently swiping along Eren’s damp cheekbone. 

Jean pulls away and brushes away the few tears that fell from Eren’s eyes.

“I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

Eren’s still smiling so Jean knows he isn’t actually upset, probably just overwhelmed. 

The brunette laughs, “Yeah, well, you did. So good job.” 

He sniffles a few times and wipes his tears away rubbing the wetness off on the thighs of his pants.

“You like it then?”

Eren reaches for the bead, twisting it around the leather and nods his head with enthusiasm. 

Jean gives him a peck on the cheek. “Good.”

Eren sighs, looking over at the two boxes still left on the table and puts them in Jean’s lap.

“I don’t think they’ll make you cry but hopefully you’ll still like them,” he says.

The blonde grins at him and then tears the paper off the first box. It’s a black lidded wooden box with a slot carved out of the lid and a lock keeping the box closed. On the front face of the box, painted in bright red letters, is the word PUNISH. Jean has a feeling he knows what the other wrapped box is. The second box is the same as the first except it reads REWARD on the front. 

Eren clears his throat. “They aren’t locked yet, I put the keys inside.” 

Jean lifts one of the lids and peaks inside, there are folded pieces of paper inside.

“I see you’ve added some suggestions already,” he says while digging the keys out.

“I may have gotten a little excited when I got them and added a few in each before I wrapped them.” 

Jean shakes up the box and tilts the opening towards Eren. “You want the honors of choosing the first one?”

A wide grin spreads of Eren’s face, and it grows wider when he sees Jean is offering him the REWARD box. He wiggles his fingers before sticking his hand inside and selecting a piece of paper. Jean puts the cover back on and locks it while Eren unfolds his reward. He got an “After Care” reward, neck petting. 

In the REWARD box, he put in ideas for “In Scene” rewards and “After Care” rewards. The PUNISH box only has “In Scene” ideas, unless Jean thinks of other ways to punish him outside of their scenes, besides not letting him get off for a week. Eren figures they’ll be open suggestion boxes, meaning that either of them can add to the box whenever they want. The brunette originally thought of adding something to the boxes whenever he did something good or bad but, he knew the PUNISH box would probably overflow. 

Jean places the boxes back on the table and sets the keys down beside them.

“I love them, thank you.” He manages to sneak a kiss under Eren’s jaw. “What did you end up picking?”

Eren shows him the piece of paper and Jean smirks as he takes the paper between his fingers.

“You can get this after round 4, if you make it,” Jean teases.

“Food first?” 

“Mhmm.”

Eren springs off the couch and heads towards the kitchen in front of Jean, raiding the fridge and cabinets to make a full meal.

\- - -

Eren decided to play chef tonight and made an early dinner for the both of them, Jean hovered nearby to watch him. Things start to get a little frisky though during the clean up.

While Jean is trying to wash the dishes, Eren is mouthing at his neck and shoulders. The blonde flicks water over his shoulders to get Eren to stop for second so he wouldn’t drop the glass pan he was currently rinsing off. He does stop with his mouth but he stays close, pressed up against him with his hands on his hips. When the pan is safe in the dish rack and Jean dries his hands, he whirls around kissing Eren with heated passion. His hands get lost in the dark tangles of Eren’s hair and he reciprocates Jean’s fervor by tightly holding him with his arms around his waist. Jean manages to walk Eren backwards out of the kitchen and into the dining area, bumping right into the dining table. The hands in Eren’s hair smooth quickly down his body till they grab just under his ass to lift him up and set him down on top of the table.

Eren’s eyes widen at Jean’s mischievous thought. “You want to go right here?”

Jean looks back at him, eyes dark and hungry. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to screw you on this table.”

“Really?”

“Mhmm.” Jean’s done talking for the moment and dives in for another kiss. 

He grabs at Eren’s hips, bringing him closer to the edge to grind their arousals together. Both of them are grunting and moaning into each other’s mouths, Eren is hypersensitive after the first three times and Jean is still feeling the aftermath of Eren’s pounding in the first round. Jean starts pulling at Eren’s waistband when the brunette pulls away.

“Wait! Wait!” he’s already breathless from Jean’s kisses. 

His hand reaches into his pocket for the little bottle of lube he had grabbed before he left the bedroom and sets it down on the table a few inches away from them. Jean looks at him with a questioning stare.

“I didn’t know what you had planned so I grabbed it just in case,” he grins back.

Jean snickers while he pulls the pants down Eren’s legs and let’s his own drop to the floor. 

The wood of the table feels cold and hard against Eren’s back when he lies down, but at this point, that’s kind of the appeal of doing it on the table. Jean’s mouth is on his jaw working slowly down to the sensitive point under his ear. His hands guide Eren’s arms over his head, lying limp, relaxed, on the table above him. 

Eren laughs quietly, “I’m not going to be able to sit at this table anymore without thinking about this now.”

Jean hums against his skin. “That’s the idea.” 

A thought twists inside Jean’s head, a fantasy of sorts and he shares it with Eren, whispers it in his ears. 

“Imagine a crowd of people sitting around this table right now. Complete strangers sitting in the shadows, watching us, watching you. They’re here for a show. They want to hear you when I make you moan…make you scream for me.” 

Hands glide down Eren’s body slowly, the touch searing into his skin. He tilts his head back, staring at the empty chairs tucked under the table. He places imaginary people in those seats, strange eyes lit up with amusement, curiosity and arousal. As Jean runs his hands down, he imagines more hands reaching out and touching his body, petting his head, fingers dancing over his arms and chest. So much attention.

The fantasy disappears when two slick fingers circle Eren’s entrance, and it’s just the two of them again. Jean’s standing between his legs waiting for Eren’s ok which he gives with a quick nod. Both fingers slide in and work the muscles enough to slide in a third after a few minutes. It doesn’t take long for Eren to start whimpering and mewling, writhing on the table. Fuck, Jean just loves watching him like this.

Eren pants, “I’m good, I’m good, _fuck_ , come on I need you _now_.” 

Just hearing that lights a fire in Jean’s gut, getting him moving faster, slicking up his cock and lining it up at Eren’s hole. The brunette props himself up on one of his elbows and grabs the back of Jean’s neck to crash their lips together. The kiss is rough and hard with enough teeth and biting to satisfy both partners. Eren pulls him closer and emits a wet gasp between them when Jean slides in all in one thrust. Hands rush to grab the flesh of Eren’s thighs to pull him closer and to keep him still for only a moment. Eren wraps his legs securely around Jean’s waist, the heels of his feet crossed at his lower back. 

The thrusts start slow at an even, steady pace. Eren lies back down flat on the table, one hand gripping tightly on to the side, the other matching Jean’s pace stroking his cock. Soft moans leave his lips, lost in the feeling of the slick push and pull of Jean’s cock inside him. The tip of his length brushes over that bundle of nerves that gets Eren to arch his back off the table and begs for Jean to go harder. As he’s going harder Eren asks for it faster. And soon he can’t stop himself from practically screaming every time Jean hits his prostate perfectly. His skin slides smoothly over the table top, shifting every time Jean slams into him. Their noises echo in the room, every moan, swear, every slap of skin on skin. Each sound urges Jean to keep going, keep going faster, harder, make Eren scream his name. 

“ _Fuck!_ I’m close, please _Jean, please!_ ” 

Eren hears him growl as he rolls his hips even faster, thrusting to a manic rhythm guiding Eren right over the edge, shouting Jean’s name like a desperate prayer.

Jean only thrusts a few more times before he pulls out and fists his own cock, coming on Eren’s stomach.

Their breathing is ragged, Jean is surprised he can still stand.

“Holy fuck!” Jean looks up at Eren’s exclamation. “That’s it. Four’s my limit.”

Jean’s shoulders shakes as he laughs. Eren sits up slowly, unwrapping his legs from Jean’s waist but keeping them close to his sides. The blonde peppers tender kisses up his neck, starting from the leather necklace, up to the soft spot behind his ear.

“Happy Anniversary.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Daw, their first D/s anniversary, how sweet. 
> 
> First, a visual reference for the necklace Jean gave Eren [here](https://img1.etsystatic.com/015/0/5664889/il_570xN.426002573_tube.jpg).
> 
> And examples of neck petting because I wasn't sure how else to describe this: [here](http://33.media.tumblr.com/a7678550729906a6f369805c59ab2969/tumblr_nk771d2oxX1qzxeqqo3_500.gif) and [here](http://31.media.tumblr.com/6ae60df575722e491d2a2f601f2ba9f5/tumblr_nk771d2oxX1qzxeqqo2_500.gif)
> 
> Whoa look who finally learned how to insert links! Took me long enough haha.
> 
> So! I've been doing a lot of thinking. There's only going to be 5 more chapters. Kinda sad, but this unfortunately can't last forever, I will run out of ideas eventually. I'm aiming to have this finished by the end of the summer. 
> 
> But good news, if all goes well, this won't be my last fic. I've got something else in the works for Jean and Eren, hopefully another multi-chapter fic because these boys deserve more. I probably won't post anything until Traffic Colors is done, so maybe come Autumn, I'll have the new fic ready. 
> 
> And if anyone has any suggestions, critiques or tips, I'd love to hear them so I can improve. There are so many things I'm aware of that I feel I can improve upon but I'd love feedback from you guys if you have any. Feel free to comment here or on my [tumblr](http://freekishly.tumblr.com/).
> 
> Thanks for reading! Love you all!


	17. October, Year One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jean really needs to quit it with the surprises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so so so so sorry!!! I could rattle off every excuse as to why this hasn’t been updated but the short version is…life happened. Nothing bad happened, in fact, everything has been going pretty damn well but, ugh! adulthood is hard. 
> 
> I owe you guys so much more than this but this is all I got right now. It’s not much but at least it’s something, right?
> 
> I promise the next update will have more.

The text alert on his phone went off about five minutes ago while he was driving. Eren knows it was Jean because it wasn’t the default tone that he uses for everyone else. He waits until he’s through the front door before he takes his phone out of his pocket to read the message.

**J:** I left something on the coffee table for you.

Eren squints at the text and looks up in the direction of the living room. He drops his gym bag in the foyer, even though Jean hates it when he leaves it there, but he’s not home right now. Won’t be for a few hours. They miraculously got some mild weather and Jean wanted to take advantage of it to pick up a soccer game with some of the guys and Sasha (He played from youth league through college but never took it seriously enough to make it a career. Only played it for fun). 

Sitting on the coffee table is just a few magazines he’s already read, the remotes for the tv, and Jean’s tablet with his good audio headphones. Eren creeps closer and notices a sticky note on the top of the tablet. 

_Put the headphones on and press play._

Intrigued, Eren picks the tablet up with the headphones and gets cozy in the corner of the couch. Once he’s comfy and has the headphones snug over his ears he wakes up the device in his hands. It is already in the video app and there appears to be one video in the library. The video doesn’t have a preview image which makes Eren all the more curious. Before he hits play, he checks his surroundings to make sure he is, in fact, alone because leave it to Jean to lure him into a comfy place and scare the crap out of him (Halloween is next week so it really wouldn’t surprise him). He listens for any creaks in the floorboards and hears nothing. He’s alone.

He presses the play button and the little icon expands to the full width of the screen. The screen remains dark and no audio. Eren checks the volume, to make sure he has the volume up to a decent level. As he’s checking he hears his name.

_“Eren.”_

That—That’s Jean’s voice. 

The video fades in when Eren hears a rustling sound and reveals their bedroom. 

Eren sees himself lying in the bed, Jean is slowly crawling over him above the sheets trying to coax him awake. He nuzzles into Eren’s neck, kissing whatever skin is currently exposed. The Eren on screen lets out a sleepy, unhappy groan and Jean just laughs quietly.

_“Mornin’”_ It’s his own voice this time.

He rolls over onto his back, rubbing his face to help him wake up more. Jean watches him, wearing that goofy (sexy) smile that he always gives Eren, and straddles his hips. He takes Eren’s wrists in his hands and he leans forward to pin them above the brunette’s head. His lips work up Eren’s neck, just light kisses that travel along his jaw, chin and, finally, lips. 

On screen, Eren smiles into the kiss, already enjoying how his morning is starting off. And the Eren who is currently in his living room, sitting on the couch is already feeling affected by this little video. He has a very good idea where this video is heading since he remembers that morning. It happened about a week ago on one of the days Jean had a late shift. He remembers it being a _very_ good morning.

He hears himself whisper something unintelligible and Jean responds by letting go of his wrists and sits up to pull his shirt off. Eren follows him up, kissing Jean deeply once his shirt is over his head and wrapping his arms around his waist to pull him in closer. He can imagine the feeling of Jean’s fingers running through his hair and tugging just a little bit, like he sees him do on the screen. The blonde swivels his hips in Eren’s lap causing him to moan into the kiss. With a surprising amount of grace, Eren twists them so Jean is on his back on the side of the bed close to the camera. Eren rolls his hips down and Jean adjusts his legs on either side of Eren to give him more leverage to thrust up when Eren comes down. Their lips slip apart when Jean lets out a gasp. Eren ghosts his lips over Jean’s jaw and then latches on to the spot under his ear. Jean turns his head as Eren leaves his mark, one hand coming up to rest on the back of his neck, subtly stroking the sensitive area. 

It is in that moment when Jean looks right at the camera. A most wicked smile stretches his lips and with his free hand he wiggles his fingers, waving back at Eren watching.

That sneaky fuck.

They had talked about this weeks ago. In fact, they talked about it the day they unpacked their last box after moving in. After a couple of celebratory drinks Eren drunkenly suggested making a tape, but not a “shitty” one. He went into details of how he would do it and Jean sat there listening and laughing at Eren’s slurred speech. The idea was never brought up again after that, but apparently Jean never forgot about it. Eren didn't brought the idea up again because he wasn’t sure what sober Jean would think of it. Plus they keep that mirror at the end of their bed so they technically could watch themselves anytime they want. But this…this is different.

Eren could be mad at Jean for doing this without telling him but he knows Jean didn’t have any ill intent making it. For heaven’s sake he shot it in full HD. Made it just for _him_ and _his_ eyes only. And the view from the camera makes it seem like a third party watching them, so Eren is seeing what someone else would see. That kind of turns him on a little bit. 

That quick moment turns out to be the one and only time Jean acknowledges the camera. Having Eren between his legs distracts him for the rest of the time.

By now, the Eren on screen has worked his way down Jean’s chest and is mouthing along the line of his hip bones (he can’t get enough of them). His hands smooth down the blonde’s sides to his thighs, pulling his loose fitting pants lower and lower until they’ve slid down the entire length of his legs. While Eren reaches for the drawer on Jean’s side of the bed to get the lube, Jean pushes the sheets further down the bed with his feet and sinks into a more comfortable place on the bed. 

Eren can’t tear his eyes away from the tablet screen in his hands. He palms at himself through his workout pants as he watches himself work Jean open, getting him to arch his back off the bed from just his fingers, hears his moans and his breathless pleas so clearly beside his ears. He’s all but dripping by the time he watches himself push in to Jean, hearing the filthy sounds they both make (he never thought he’d get turned on listening to himself but damn). 

Jean gets fucked good and slow at the start, rolling his hips in time with Eren’s until he’s gasping for Eren to go harder…go faster. The brunette listens, sitting back to kneel on the bed, grabbing on to Jean’s hips and lifting them up to pound into him. 

_“Shhhit.”_ Jean reaches back and grabs hold on to one of the bars on the headboard. 

Eren can hear it rattle from Jean’s quick grip and their furious movement on the bed. Jean’s other hand grips the sheets on his side. Their sounds get louder, the slapping of skin, heavy panting and moans masks any noises the bed makes. 

Jean stutters and swears that he’s close. From the side, Eren can see the blonde’s muscles tensing in his body as he gets closer to his climax. The hand on the headboard lets go and reaches for Jean’s cock, fisting it a few times before his spills his release over his hand.

On screen, Eren hisses, _“Oh fuck,”_ between his teeth. 

He keeps going, bringing Jean right to the edge of overstimulation as he keeps hitting his prostate. 

Eren bites down hard on his lip watching himself finish, his hips are stationary when he releases still inside Jean, his body shuddering from the effect. 

Jean beckons him closer with a finger and Eren doesn’t hesitate to lie right on top of him. A hand rubs soothingly along Eren’s back and he presses light kisses on Jean’s chest. Both of them just take a barely a minute to catch their breath.

_“What brought that on?”_ he hears himself ask a little breathlessly.

_“Just wanted you to have a decent start to your day.”_ Now Eren recognizes the mischievous undertone to his words, he didn’t catch it then.

The screen begins to fade to black when Eren leans in to kiss Jean again and the video closes out, bringing the video library back up.

Eren lets out a frustrated groan. He’s turned on and he’s alone, which doesn’t really help him out much. He tosses the tablet and headphones aside bolts off the couch to grab his phone he left on the island in the kitchen. 

“Damn bastard better answer his phone,” he mutters to himself.

The call connects after two rings.

“Hey!” Jean sounds out of breath from the game, and hearing his heaving breathing is not helping Eren out.

“You seriously left me alone to watch _that_ all by myself!?”

Jean pulls his phone away but Eren can still hear him laughing. “Did you watch the whole thing?”

“Yes!”

“And?”

“ **AND** now I need you to get your ass back here and finish what you started.”

Eren can sense Jean’s smirk through the phone. “You telling me what to do now Jaeger?”

“Would you rather I beg?” he answers sarcastically.

“Well you know how much I love it when you do.” 

Eren whines. Jean’s playing with him and it’s really not fair when he’s in his current condition. 

“I’ll be back before five, so you’ll have to wait till then.”

“I’ll try,” he sighs. “Can’t make any promises though.”

He hears Jean click his tongue. “Then I’m telling you right now _to wait_.”

Eren smiles, “Better hurry then. You know how impatient I can be.”

Call disconnects.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t know about you, but I think someone is looking to get punished _*wink wink*_
> 
>  
> 
> Side note 1: please don’t ever record your partner without them knowing, just don’t.
> 
> Side note 2: I can not tell you how it feels to get comments where people say they never liked or thought about Jean and Eren together but they really enjoy this story. Or when people say they're not usually into BDSM but like the story. I turn into a gooey mess and can't articulate how happy that makes me. 
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you guys for sticking around and reading. You guys are the greatest ever!!


	18. Late April, Year Zero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Their first scene.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, it’s been a while. I kept going back and forth on what idea I wanted to post next. Did I want to go further into their relationship or take a step back and revisit the past? I would pick an idea and start writing then stop after a few paragraphs because I’d get inspired to write a different scene. There was one thing that kept bothering me though. I never knew how their first scene went. It kept nagging me that I didn’t know, I had to find out.
> 
>  
> 
> I’m not sure what I want to post after this. I’ll stick my thoughts at the end and let you guys decide.

_Deep breath._

For every new Dom, there’s the pre scene jitters before the first scene. Worries of incompatibility, nervous about doing something wrong, fears of having to start the search all over again. Except this time, there’s more riding on this should it fail.

Their friendship could change should this fail. Their friendship could change should this actually go well. 

But there’s the intrigue, the curiosity. The thrill of doing something you probably shouldn’t. Hell that’s what this lifestyle is mostly about. The taboo. 

Then the rumors. Hanji said past subs called him good, more than. He wonders if what he heard was true, or was that just Hanji trying to get him interested. Either way, it worked.

It’s what made him walk through the front door of the cafe that day and sit down in front of him. It’s what held him to his spot on the couch and talk about what he liked, what he didn’t. It’s why he agreed to do _this_.

_Deep breath._

His fist is balled, hovering over the door, breathing out his nerves before he sets this in motion. 

Everything should go smoothly. It was agreed upon that they’d start slow, though that word can have many definitions. No specifics were talked about, they decided to talk about it when he arrived, and he’s been standing outside for about two minutes.

_Here we go._

Eren knocks on the door, masking his nerves quickly before it opens. 

He hears the latch click and the door swings open revealing Jean, his friend, and now his possible new Dom. His clothes were casual, not a strip of leather or latex like some of his past Doms wore, though he’s not exactly sure what he was expecting. The smirk however, that’s familiar. 

“You going to stand out there all day or what?”

Jean moves to the side to allow Eren to step over the threshold into the apartment. He looks Eren over, his facial expression and body language. The door shuts with a soft noise when the latch catches. 

“Do you still want to do this? You can walk away, no pressure.” 

One thing Jean made clear the previous weekend was the fact that his partner’s consent was _extremely_ important. In general, he’s not okay with doing something unless his partner is absolutely sure it’s what they want. Jean said he didn’t care if he had to alter a scene he’d already planned or spend an hour explaining something if his partner didn’t understand. He’d rather change everything than have a submissive not enjoy themselves and/or be uncomfortable during the scene and risk a sub drop after. 

Eren’s voice is steady when he answers, “I want to do this.”

“Alright,” Jean nods once and gestures towards the living room. “I usually talk with my subs a few days in advance but since this is our first scene and it’s pretty simple, I thought we could talk about it now.”

“Ok.” Eren rounds the couch and sits in the same spot he’d been in last week, Jean sits on the opposite end.

“For today I figured a good place to start would be just getting use to touching each other, find where the limits are. It will be mostly hands, scratching, light kissing. Maybe incorporate biting if you’re comfortable with it. That sound ok?”

A slight feeling of disappointment fills Eren. He knew they’d be starting off slow but that’s really slow, like entry level sub stuff. But, he remembers, this isn’t just about Eren being comfortable with Jean, it’s about Jean getting comfortable with Eren, too. 

“Yeah, that’s fine,” he says.

Jean subtly sighs in relief. “Is there anywhere you don’t want to be touched?”

“Um—“ Eren thinks for a moment. “I don’t like my feet getting touched. And uh, my sides can be sensitive sometimes, kind of ticklish. You don’t need to avoid them but, if I start laughing—now you know.”

“Good to know,” his smirk says he’s storing that information for later.

“What about you?” Eren inquires.

“Normally I don’t let subs touch me often, but for the sake of getting comfortable, I’ll give you a free pass the first time.”

“I can touch you anywhere?” 

It’s barely noticeable but Jean’s demeanor is slowly changing, a form of confidence washing over his aura. 

“Mhmm.”

Eren raises a brow. “So, if I wanted to grab your ass I could?”

“Only if you’re prepared for the consequences,” he says with a predatory smile. 

The brunette swallows, “Duly noted.”

Jean’s lips curve into a small smile. “Couple more things.”

Eren nods.

“We agreed no visible marks so I just want to clarify your boundaries since you work without a shirt sometimes.” 

Jean is being very thorough, Eren thinks, and he’s impressed.

“I always cover up for the kids classes, so as long as there’s no marks on my neck or forearms, I’m good.”

He notices Jean’s notebook on the coffee table for the first time when Jean leans over to write something in it. The blonde sits back and silently observes Eren again.

“If things go well,” Jean begins, “Would you let me suck you off?”

The blonde says it so nonchalantly that for a moment Eren isn’t sure if he’s being serious. Eren stares for a few seconds until Jean raises an expectant eyebrow. _Shit_ , he’s not joking.

“Uh, yeah.”

If he were honest, Eren would admit he’s been thinking about what Hanji said a lot. “ _Especially with that mouth of his_ ,” circling around in his brain on repeat and it increased after he found out it was Jean, makes him all the more curious. Eren is the type to not believe something till he tries it, so here he is. 

Itching to start, Jean shifts, sitting on the edge of the couch. “You remember the safe words?”

The corner of Eren’s mouth tugs itself into a smirk, “Traffic colors, right? Red, yellow, green.”

“Those would be the ones.” He gives Eren one more once over. “You ready?”

“Ready.”

They both stand and Jean leads the way down the hall, past the spare bedroom he uses as an office then into his bedroom. 

Eren walks in and scans the space. He’s been in this room before but he barely recognizes it now. The blinds are shut tight over the one window so the room is only lit by a couple of warm lamps. The bed looks freshly made with the top sheet and comforter neatly folded back at the end of the mattress. His eyes linger on the bed envisioning the two of them on it, realizing that will be happening very soon.

Eren swallows back butterflies, “Where do you want me?”

“Right there is fine.” 

Jean is standing by the door, watching. The brunette spins in place until he’s facing the door and the man standing beside it. 

“So you know, general rule, the scene doesn’t start until this door is closed. Once it’s shut, nothing outside this room matters.”

Their history, their friendship, it ends at the threshold. 

“Ok,” Eren breathes. 

“I’ll ask one more time, is there anything we just talked about that you do not want to do?”

Eren shakes his head, “No.”

He watches Jean reach for the door knob and begins to slowly close the door.

“Safe words?”

“Red,” Eren’s heart is pounding. “Yellow,” His palms are a little clammy. “Green,” but he wants this.

He wants it bad.

A soft click, and the world outside is shut out.

The change is almost instant, like a flip of a switch. Jean gives off the air of a predator, a methodical one. Eren can feel him sizing him up as he circles. He wants to turn his head to follow but he’s been in this position before and knows not to move unless he’s told.

Jean smirks, recognizing trained obedience. 

_Oh, he’s going to be fun to play with._

As he circles back to the front, Jean gives his first order.

“Take off your shirt and pants.” 

There’s a slight hesitation, like he was waiting for more orders to follow, but when nothing more comes, he removes the clothes as instructed. 

Touching. It’s a simple concept and yet, in this context, it seems so much more complex. To Jean, touching is important. Touch is how he breaks someone down. It is how he pieces them back together. Touch...is how he gets them to submit.

When approaching a new sub he plans to carry out a long term relationship with, he starts out slow so they’ll be comfortable (if this were a one time fling, he’d already have them on their knees or tied down on the bed). Trust has to be built up, and he starts this way every time. No matter the person, there’s a difference between talking about, and the thought of, being touched by someone, and then there’s actually _being_ touched by another person. Jean wants his subs to be comfortable with his hands, recognize their touch and not flinch when they explore somewhere new.

It’s clear Eren has not been approached this way before, and Jean plans to rid his mind of the doubt that lurks inside it.

Eren can feel Jean standing behind him, feel the heat against his bare back. Despite the heat of his body, the fingers that circle his wrists are slightly cool. He remains still and closes his eyes as Jean’s touch rises higher. Fingers glide up the backs of his arms, over his elbows, biceps, and shoulders. The movement is done symmetrically, twin sensations on both sides. 

His breathing is even, so far, so good.

Jean’s hands move along the tops of his shoulders and meet at the back of his neck. The tops of his fingertips graze the back of Eren’s neck, causing his breath to hitch ever so slightly and a light shiver runs down his spine. While one hand stays on his neck, the other goes further, sliding through his thick hair, tangling the fingers at the top of his head. The blonde decides to test this boundary and tightens his grip around the strands. Eren inhales deeply through his nose.

Jean smiles, “You good?”

“Yeah,” he responds, his voice already taking on a dry rasp.

Eren exhales when Jean pulls a bit tighter.

“Do you like that?” he whispers to the back of Eren’s ear.

“Mhmm.”

The fingers in his hair disappear and reappear on the tops of his shoulders. Jean’s hands travel over every inch of his back, feeling the solid muscle underneath, watching the back of his ribs expand with every even breath, and they go lower to his waist, off to the sides to his hips. With a slight bend of the knee, Jean smoothes his hands up the back of Eren’s thighs, his fingers teasing the borders of his inner thighs and then up over his ass until he reaches his lower back. 

Eren opens his eyes when he hears Jean’s voice again telling him that he’s moving to his front now. In the short moment between the blonde moving around him, Eren takes in what has happened so far, and really nothing too much has happened, except Jean touching him. It’s such a simple thing but it feels…different. He never imagined exploratory touching to be this sensual, this enjoyable. 

Jean appears in front of him, eyes shamelessly roving over the new skin. In that moment, Jean thinks to himself that he has very attractive friends and this isn’t the first time he’s thought that. 

Their eyes meet and Eren takes it as a challenge to hold his gaze, even when Jean raises his hands and touches the sides of his neck. Jean looks away first and follows his hands down over strong collar bones, defined chest and abs. He can feel every muscle move under the taut, tanned skin, can feel each breath and heartbeat. 

It’s taking more effort than he thought to keep calm. Eren feels himself slipping under the spell of Jean’s hands but he refuses to admit to himself how easy it was. 

Jean steps even closer, hands traveling back up, one to his neck, the other on his ribs. He leans into Eren’s space and pauses, giving the brunette time to say something if he feels uncomfortable, but he says nothing, so Jean continues. The tip of his nose brushes the top of Eren’s shoulder and a second later, his lips follow. His breath ghosts over the skin under his lips and more chills race over every nerve in Eren’s body.

Each kiss is light, a brief moment of contact and then on to the next spot. Slowly the blonde’s lips get closer to Eren’s neck, the anticipation causing his fingers to twitch. Lips are at the junction where his neck and shoulders meet, he shuts his eyes again focusing on breathing normally. Jean can already see right through him though, his thumb purposefully poised over the brunette’s pulse on his neck and can feel his heart rate increase as Jean gets closer. 

He decides to test the limits again. As his lips reach the hinge of Eren’s jaw, he swipes his tongue over the skin before kissing the slick spot. Jean feels Eren’s pulse jump beneath his thumb.

“You still ok?”

The blonde speaks right into his ear, only a little louder than a whisper. His voice is low and alluring, something Eren’s never heard before in his voice.

“Yes.” 

Jean doesn’t pull away and speaks in his ear again.

“Yes, what?”

Eren knows what he’s asking for and he didn’t think he’d be ready to give him that yet, but he finds the words slipping easily off his tongue.

“Yes, _Sir_.”

He waits for the weirdness and awkward moment, but surprisingly it doesn’t come. Saying that didn’t feel as weird as he thought it would. It doesn’t feel weird at all. He likes it.

It’s not a full submission, but Jean will take it.

Jean takes a few steps back and instructs Eren to get on the bed, lying on his stomach. He does as he’s told, grabbing a pillow to stuff under his chin and wrap his arms around. His hips swivel trying to find a comfortable spot for the growing length between his legs. The fact that he is turned on doesn’t surprise him. It’s been a while since he’s been with somebody, and it’s been even longer since he’s had a Dom to go to, and Jean is treating him just right so far.

The bed dips on either side of him, Jean’s knees beside each of his hips. Fingertips dig into the skin of his shoulders and Eren feels them curve so the nails scratch lightly down his back. Those fingers eventually tug on the waistband of Eren’s boxers.

“Can I take these off?” Jean watches the back of Eren’s head as he nods. “I need a verbal answer.”

Eren hears the minor scold behind his words.

“Yes,” he pauses. “Sir.”

He feels the fabric begin to slip over skin, all the way down his legs. Eren hides his face in the pillow because now he’s naked in Jean’s bed, and he’s excited about it. 

Those fingers are back, taking their sweet time going back up Eren’s toned legs, his thumbs pressing hard on his inner thighs and Eren can’t help the small noise he makes in his chest. 

It’s been a while ok? He can’t help it if he’s already unraveling to a simple suggestive touch.

And Jean knows exactly what he’s doing.

He places a few light kisses going up the knobs of Eren’s spine.

“Color?”

Eren takes a deep breath. 

“Green,” he exhales.

Jean hums his approval. “Don’t. Move.”

Eren immediately feels the need to shift every limb.

The blonde’s bangs sweeping over his skin as he leaves light kisses across his shoulders. One. Two more light kisses and then pain on his shoulder blade.

“ _Fuck!_ ” Eren tenses.

Jean laves his tongue over the first bite mark, relieving the sting somewhat before finding the next spot. The brunette sinks back into the bed, now he knows what to expect. 

The sensations alternate between kisses, nips and deep bites randomly all over his back. Jean keeps his hands on Eren’s waist, pushing him down to keep him from squirming too much. 

Eren can’t help it now, his breathing heavy, biting back any sound out of spite. Jean only bites down harder when he does that. 

Only one other Dom explored Eren’s biting kink. Thinking back on it now, that was just child’s play. He doesn’t remember getting this riled up over it.

He’s suddenly flipped onto his back, wide eyes land on Jean, hovering over him on his hands and knees. Jean glances down at his body with a wicked expression. Eren wants to melt into the bed, his blush reaching down his neck. 

“Can I touch you?”

Eren doesn’t even need to be looking at Jean to know his expression is a smug one. And that even that doesn’t stop his unfiltered mouth.

“Fuck, yes _please_.” 

The brunette squeezes his eyes shut realizing that came out a lot more desperate than he meant it to. _Shit_.

Lips touch his chest before cool fingers wrap around his cock. The thumb rubs over the head, smearing pre come and spreading it thinly down the length and back up. He strokes him slowly as he attaches his mouth to different places on the front of Eren’s torso. Sheets get pulled into Eren’s tight grip, unsure of where else to put his hands. 

The only predictable thing this time is that Jean will go lower. He licks along the deep V carved into Eren’s body, then works outward over his hips, down to his thighs. Jean’s free hand sneaks its way underneath Eren’s knee to lift it up. He feels the full body shudder when he kisses close to the inner thighs. And he’s more than pleased by loud moan that Eren releases when he takes a good bite out of the sensitive flesh. 

Eren immediately covers his mouth after the sound escaped. Jean reaches to pull it away.

“You can be loud. I’m sure my neighbors have heard louder, or worse.” He mumbles that last part.

In Eren’s state of mind he’s not sure how he should interpret the “or worse” part. It’s not that bad really, Jean use to have a sub who was a bit of a screamer. She never knew how to keep her begging quiet.

Eren’s other leg gets the same treatment; teasing licks and another moan worthy bite on the inner thigh. All the while, Jean’s hand hasn’t stop the slow torture on his cock, pressing along the vein from the base to the tip. He even manages to make Eren whimper when he teases the spot under then head. 

“So what do you say? Want me to finish you off like this?” Jean pulls tight on a languid pull of his cock for emphasis. “Or would you like _more_?”

Eren throws his head back, “ _especially with that mouth of his_ ” echoing in his head. 

“ _Ngh_ , more.”

He tries to roll his hips up, an involuntary action really, but Jean pinches his side hard.

“Ow! Shit,” Eren curses and then corrects himself. “More please, _Sir_.”

So he’s a stickler for the title, Eren makes a mental note. 

Eren was not ready for how good Jean really is with that “mouth of his”. He’s had his fair share of giving and receiving blow jobs but this…

Whoever told Hanji that Jean was very good was a fucking liar. 

His mouth is a fucking sin.

If submitting to Jean means that this would happen more often, Eren would fight to be first in line. He’s not going to tell Jean that though, his ego is doing just fine without that knowledge. Plus, the fact that it only took him a few minutes to finish Eren off, probably told him everything he needed to know.

When it’s all over, Eren glances at the clock on the end table, it’s barely been an hour but it felt way longer than that. 

Then it hits him. He just kind of had sex with Jean. That thought should cause panic but the afterglow is pretty strong, it’s been way too god damn long.

Jean snaps his fingers in front of his face to get his attention.

Eren shakes his head to clear a bit of the fog. “What?”

The blonde chuckles, “I asked if you wanted to use the shower.”

Eren wiggles in his spot, closing his eyes. “Yeah. Um, in a minute.”

He only lies there for a few seconds before he remembers and looks over at Jean.

“You didn’t—uh—get off.” 

Jean barely reacts, just lies there. “I normally don’t during the first scene. I usually keep my focus on the sub and worry about myself after.” 

Eren’s brows furrow together with question.

“That doesn’t mean I didn’t get turned on, or enjoyed it. I just like to make the first scene about the sub that’s all.”

Eren doesn’t say anything about the small tent he can make out in Jean’s pants. The scene is over and it’s probably not his place to offer to help him out. 

Eventually, Jean shoos Eren off the bed and into the bathroom to shower. He shows him where he keeps the gel to put on the bite marks so they’ll fade quicker. Eren nods, but puts the gel back when Jean shuts the door behind him. He wants to keep the marks as long as possible, he likes them. As the water warms up, he admires them.

Jean is out in the living room when Eren gets out of the bathroom. The brunette gets dressed and shuffles out into the hallway. They’d decided to just sit and watch a movie as the after care. The scene wasn’t too intense that he’d need anything more than that. Jean handed him a water and brought out snacks for them to munch on. They didn’t talk during the movie expect to make comments about the characters. Things were feeling pretty normal.

By the end of the movie, Eren feels more than fine and gets up to leave. Jean walks him to the door and tells him to think everything over for a few days, let the high wear off before he decides. 

The morning after, the high is definitely gone, but Eren looks down at the bite marks all over his chest and the deep purple ones on his inner thighs and knows he wants to go again. He waits though, like Jean instructed, waits until the next day and calls during his lunch break.

Eren paces outside on the sidewalk in front of the gym with his phone to his ear listening to the ringing tone. The call connects after the sixth ring.

“Hey, hold on one sec.”

The brunette nods even though Jean can’t see him.

“Sorry. What’s up?”

Eren stares at his feet, he needs to get over this whole nervous thing.

“I thought about it.”

“You already made your decision?” 

“I—Yeah.” Jean is quiet, waiting for Eren to continue. “I’m in, if you are.”

“Really?”

Eren laughs, “Why do you sound so surprised?”

“I wasn’t sure how you’d react to all this once you thought it through.” He sounds…relieved.

Eren stops pacing to ask his next question. “And what about you?”

Jean laughs lightly away from the phone. “I’m interested. Still curious to see what happens.”

There’s really no point in beating around the bush then.

With a wide grin, Eren asks, “When’s the next scene?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's not super kinky, but they had to start somewhere. And I'm just a super fan of sensual BDSM, in case you couldn't tell by now.
> 
> Hopefully there weren't too many spelling and grammar errors, I'm still not good at catching everything.  
>  
> 
> Here are some ideas I’ve been working on, but nothing is finished yet. I got suggestions before to add a moment with friends and a bit of angst so I incorporated those into some of these :)  
> -Role reversal: Eren dominates Jean.  
> -Trouble in paradise: Eren gets mad at Jean; first serious “fight”  
> -Championship: Jean and their group of friends go to watch Eren fight; someone finds out about how they really got together.  
> -Wax play: Eren asks to try it again after the first time didn’t end well.  
> -Got an idea or suggestion, tell me!!!
> 
> As always, thanks for reading! :D


	19. Asides

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These are some asides I've had stashed away for a while. They weren't long enough to be there own chapters but I still wanted to share them. Two of them I've had for quite a bit of time, the third one came from a comment made by KayLingLing7 (sorry it's not a full chapter!). 
> 
> I'm not sure when the next full length chapter will be out. Right now, I'm in the process of buying a new house, my move in date is hopefully sometime in January, I'll be traveling for the upcoming holidays, and I need to pack up my apartment. And I have to deal with all this home loan stuff, there's too much stuff! So, long story short, I'll write when I can but the next chapter might not be out until the new year. Just hang in there, I promise I'm not leaving!! 
> 
> So, in case I'm not back before then, Happy Holidays and Happy New Year!
> 
> As always, thank you for reading! You guys are the best!

* * *

  ** _One - Early August, Year Zero_**  

Today was suppose to be a good day. He was suppose to do his half day at work teaching the kids’ class, go home for lunch which would have been Armin’s stir fry leftovers from last night. Then, after a thorough shower, he’d head over to Jean’s for some much needed release. 

But…it didn’t work out that way.  

The kids’ class was great, always is. Eren genuinely enjoys teaching them and watching them grow and become stronger fighters. They make teaching worth it. After the class though, his day just went down hill.

As he was getting in his car to go home when his phone rang. It was Jean. 

Apparently his dad was getting a minor procedure done at the hospital, just a routine thing, nothing too invasive. His mom called him while she was sitting in her driveway, her car wouldn’t start, so she asked him to go pick up his dad. Jean was already on his way to go get him when he called Eren. He explained that the scene will have to be postponed because after he picks his dad up from the hospital and bring him home, he has to stay and wait with his mom until her car gets fixed at the shop. Long story short, Jean is going to have a _long_ day. 

When Eren asked to move the scene to tomorrow, Jean says he already has plans with Marco. Trying to find a day during the week is tough, and usually a last minute request by Eren on nights he isn’t too tired. So for now, the scene is pushed to _next weekend_. 

Eren can’t admit he was really looking forward to the scene today. It’s been a few days since he’s gotten off, today would have been a relief for him. He plays it cool on the phone with Jean, claiming next weekend would be fine, he can wait. 

What a lie.

Eren drove home more than a little bummed out. His mood worsened when he got home and opened the fridge, Armin took the leftovers to work, so no lunch for Eren.

And now Eren is standing in his kitchen trying to figure out what to do with the rest of his day. Both Armin and Mikasa are out for the day, so Eren can stay in the apartment by himself all day or get a hold of other friends to do something. He grabs his phone and sends off rounds of texts to his friends to see if any of them are free. While he waits for all their responses he goes down the hall to the bathroom to take a shower. 

During his shower, all of his texts have responses. Every. Single. Person, is busy. They’re working, out of town, or, just in general, too busy. This is just not Eren’s day.

Eren slides his phone onto his desk in his room and sits on his bed with his towel still wrapped around his waist. He glances at the clock. He’d be minutes to walking out the door to go to Jean’s if he hadn’t canceled. With a sigh, he falls back on his bed, soaking in all his frustration. 

_Well,_ he thinks, _there is one way to entertain myself._

His hands travel slowly to his waist, untucking the towel and letting it fall open. The skin is still damp from the shower and he teases himself as he begins to let his mind wander. Only, it wanders right into Jean’s bedroom and imagines all the kinky shit they’ve been doing in that room together. He doesn’t focus on one particular scene either, just flashes of their slick, naked bodies writhing against each other. Or the times when Eren was tied down to the bed with Jean between his legs with his mouth doing what it does best. Or the time Jean fucked him hard and rough against the wall. Eren imagines Jean’s voice whispering filth in his ear, telling him to squeeze harder, pump faster, asking how close he is, telling him to come in a voice so wrecked and close to the edge. 

When he comes down from his lack-luster orgasm, he doesn’t feel satisfied. Not one bit. Now he just feels sweaty, gross and even more frustrated than when he started. He keeps thinking he wouldn’t have felt this way if Jean’s mom’s car didn’t die. Eren would have been on his knees in front of his Dom with his mouth full and his hair in a firm grip. Jean would have fucked him properly till he couldn’t remember what day it was. And that thought frustrates Eren even more.

Jean is to blame for all of today’s frustrations. First he canceled, which now Eren is mad at him about that even though he had a legitimate excuse. And just now the blonde invaded his thoughts while jacking off. Eren has never specifically fantasized about Jean before and he’s angry how easy it was to do. All future “me time” is probably ruined now because now Jean is unfairly good at what he does. No one person should be allowed to be that good. 

Eren decides he can’t lie in his bed dirty and angry anymore and he goes to clean himself up. What was the point of even taking the shower beforehand?

 - - -

Armin walks into a dark apartment, the only light source is coming from the muted TV in the living room. At first, he thinks Eren left it on when he left to go spend the night with his Dom, but then he sees familiar feet hanging over the arm of the couch. Armin sets his bag down by the hall and leans over the back of the couch. Eren is there lying on his back, arms crossed over his chest, scowling at the ceiling.

“Thought you were going to see your Dom tonight.” Armin says.

Eren huffs, bitter, “He canceled.” 

Armin’s brows furrow, “Just for the night or indefinitely?”

The brunette deflates a little at the question. “Just tonight. Something came up he had to take care of.”

“So you just sat here and sulked all day?” Armin laughs.

“Ugh! I tried getting a hold of people but everyone else was busy.”

“Everyone?” Eren nods. “Connie and Sasha? Reiner? Jean—“

“Fuck Jean.” _No seriously, fuck him_. Then someone else will understand Eren’s frustration with the guy.

“Jeez. What’s with the hostility? You guys have been getting along lately. You can’t blame him just because you didn’t get laid and you’re bored.”

God, Armin doesn’t even know how wrong he is.

Eren scowls more, “I can try.”

* * *

  ** _Two - December, Year One_**

Since moving in together, Eren has picked up the habit of just watching Jean. He’ll be doing the most mundane domestic things but Eren can’t look away. Every motion has intent and unspoken confidence, unlike the gangling teenager he knew in high school. He grew into his body well.  

Most times, Jean goes about his business completely unaware of Eren’s gaze. He won’t notice until hands grope his body and a promise of “we can be quick” is whispered in his ear. It’s never as quick as those promises imply.

Eren wakes up alone in bed this morning, that’s not unusual. With the way their schedules are, Jean has to be _at_ work by the time Eren usually has to _leave_ for work. At most they share twenty minutes in the morning, if Eren wakes up when he’s suppose to. He’s slipping on his sweatpants when he hears movement downstairs. Jean hasn’t left for work yet.  

Jean is standing in the kitchen waiting for the coffee maker to finish brewing. Channeling his inner stalker, Eren leans against the end of the hallway that leads into the kitchen and watches his boyfriend. The blonde takes two mugs out of the cabinet, then the sugar and the creamer from the fridge. As the coffee maker clicks off, Eren makes his presence known.

“You know you’re sexy even when you’re not trying,” he pauses, “Like right now.”

Jean startles, thankfully he wasn’t pouring the coffee yet, and looks over his shoulder at Eren. He didn’t even realize he was awake yet. The blonde shakes his head and laughs at Eren’s forwardness, turning back to his task.

“What do you want Eren?”

Eren pushes off the wall and slowly makes his way over to Jean in the corner. 

“Why do you think I want something?” he grins not so innocently.

“‘Cause you’re complimenting me,” Jean says as he’s pouring the last of the coffee into the second mug. 

“I’m not allowed to say something nice without having an ulterior motive?”

He only receives a look that says that’s exactly what Jean thinks.

By this point, Eren is only a few foot steps away, looking Jean up and down, licking his lips unconsciously.

“You look good,” he says low, crowding Jean against the corner of the countertop.

Jean sighs and resists Eren’s pull, even as his lips ghost over his neck, breathing hot on his skin. He grips the edge of the counter, a move Eren notices.

“I have to leave in ten minutes.” Jean tries to say it sternly, _tries._

Eren hums against his throat. “ _Mhmm_.”

“I can’t call in late again.”

“Shame.” 

Eren braces one hand on the edge of the counter, his arm between Jean’s and his waist, the other hand reaches behind the blonde, hooking his fingers around the handle of the mug of coffee, then he pulls away.

Jean watches Eren pull back with a smirk and coffee in his hand. 

“Dick,” he shoves at Eren.

The coffee jostles in the mug. “Hey! Hot!”

He blows over the top of the mug, and still wearing his smug smirk, takes a sip of the coffee. Jean huffs, grabbing his own mug, and walking toward the hallway to go back upstairs to finish getting ready.

“I wasn’t kidding,” Eren starts. “You do look sexy.” He adds a wink for good measure.

“Still a dick.” Jean calls over his shoulder, walking out of the kitchen.

Barely a second goes by before Jean turns back around. 

“You know what?” His lips are curling into something wicked. “You can pick a punishment from the box tonight. How ‘bout that?”

Eren’s shoulders drop. “Aw c’mon. That doesn’t deserve a punishment.”

Jean walks back out of the room mumbling under his breath.

“You always deserve a punishment.” 

* * *

**_Three - February, Year Zero_ **

 It’s been on the tip of his tongue for weeks.  

For whatever reason, when it pops into his head his stomach starts churning, his palms get sweaty and he knows that if he were to speak he’d probably stumble over some words. He takes it as a sign that he’s not ready so he holds his tongue. But it’s that time of year though, where the thoughts and sentiments are in every store window. It all serves as a constant reminder.

Jean loves Eren.

 - - -

Marco has made it a habit over the years to spontaneously drop by Jean’s apartment to check up on him, make sure he actually leaves his office/computer, eats a decent meal, maybe leave the apartment for a little while just to get out. He just likes to make sure he’s doing ok. Even though Jean has Eren now, Marco still stops by, old habits and all of that.

Saturday usually isn’t a good day to just “drop by” Jean’s apartment. It’s usually his day with Eren. Today is a rare exception since Eren was visiting a different gym to meet up with some fighters and trainers to talk about training for the upcoming fight in the summer. So Marco picked today to visit. 

Jean was lounging on his couch when Marco walked in, catching up on a tv show he usually misses because Eren doesn’t like to watch it. The show gets paused while the two of them catch up, the usual “how’ve you been…how’s work…how’s life treating you”. Then Marco brings up Eren.

“Is Eren coming over tonight?” he asks casually.

Jean takes a sip of his drink before answering, “Yeah, he’ll probably be here in a little bit.”

Marco smirks, “How many nights is this now?” 

Jean narrows his eyes at Marco’s teasing.

“What?” Marco is laughing now and Jean still doesn’t answer. “Oh come on! He’s like your first super serious relationship, which years ago would have been odd for you two, so I’m totally allowed to make fun of you guys.”

“Whatever.” The blonde rolls his eyes. Marco does kind of have a point.

Marco leans forward and stage whispers, “Have you said the ‘L’ word yet?” 

Jean’s cheeks tinge pink. “No.”

“You do love him though.” He knows Jean well enough, it’s not really a question.

Again, he doesn’t answer, he only sighs and tries to sink into the couch.

“ _Jean._ ”

“Yeah, I do.”

Marco smiles obnoxiously and Jean looks anywhere but back at that freckled face. “You gonna tell him?”

That’s such a silly question. Of course Jean is going to tell him…right? It’s just a matter of finding the right time and circumstance, he can’t just blurt it out.

“Eventually.” And that’s all Jean says.

 - - -

No sooner after Marco left did Eren walk through the door. Jean could already tell from the sound of his shuffled footsteps that he’s exhausted. The thought was confirmed when Eren rounded the couch and slithered onto the cushions, dropping his head on Jean’s lap. 

It didn’t take much to convince him to go to bed after watching one movie. Jean shooed Eren away into the bedroom while he sat for a moment longer on the couch before getting up and locking up for the night. He took his time going from the front door to lock it, then to each room turning off lights. His conversation with Marco this afternoon bouncing around in his head.  

He will tell Eren eventually. It’s such a big step though and nerve wracking. How the hell is he going to do it!? It was hard enough just to tell the guy he _liked_ him. He avoided him for four days before he broke like a dam and words spilled out. Although, it was Eren who initiated that conversation when he showed up at Jean’s door that day.

The brunette is already in bed and out cold by the time Jean walks into the bedroom, his deep heavy breathing already audible. He had left the overhead light on, he either forgot or was too tired to get back out of bed to shut it off. Probably the latter. Jean flicks off the light and heads to the bathroom to brush his teeth before sneaking under the blankets beside Eren. He lies there silently on his side staring at Eren’s back, one nagging thought eating away at him. There’s no way he’s falling right to sleep, this will bother him until he finally gets it over with. 

Jean internally berates himself. _Seriously! How hard is it to say? It’s just three words. Three very simple words._

“I love you.” The words come out as barely a whisper, so softly spoken, Jean barely heard himself. 

He only said them to prove to himself that he can, in fact, say those words. He feels confident and safe in the dark next to his sleeping partner.

Except, Eren isn’t asleep.

Eren was riding the cusp of sleep, fully relaxed, body completely a dead weight on the mattress, when those words were spoken aloud.

Eren’s eyes shoot open, blinking several times like it is going to help clarify what he just heard. And he heard something he can’t ignore.

Jean is mortified when Eren starts to move and rolls onto his back, propping himself up on his elbows to look over at Jean. Thank god it’s fairly dark because Jean’s face is on fire with a deep, embarrassed, blush.

“What’d you say?” 

The blonde turns his head, hiding his face in his pillow. “ _Ffffuck_ …nothing.” he mumbles.

Of course, Eren doesn’t buy that answer. He knows they’ve both been tip-toeing around this for too long. And this…is not how he expected this moment to happen. 

Again, Eren shifts, lying on his side facing Jean and scooting a bit closer. 

“ _Jean,_ ” he coos.

Jean can hear the smile on Eren’s face and recognizes he’s being teased (for the second time today about this subject). He gives in with a huff and turns his head to face Eren who is suddenly much closer.

“Say it again,” Eren asks.

Honey eyes flit back and forth between the vibrant sea green staring back, the color stands out even in the dark, or maybe Jean just imagines it does. Admitting defeat, he sighs.

_You put yourself in this position. Should have checked to see if he was asleep first._

But Eren definitely heard him, Jean can tell by the way he’s trying not to grin. He wants Jean to say it.

Jean inches even closer until there’s a breath of space between the tips of their noses. 

“I love you.”

Eren shyly bites his bottom lip, holding back his ecstatic smile. He surges forward, closing that small space between them, always been a man of action more than words, pressing his body against Jean’s, wrapping an arm around him holding him close, tasting the remnants of those words on his lips. Jean manages to snake a hand out to cradle Eren’s face, his fingers teasing the hairline along his neck. 

He may have said the words, but Jean is totally ok if he doesn’t hear them back. Eren’s reaction alone pretty much says everything he needs to know. 

The kiss slows down and their lips smack apart. They’re both exhausted, Eren probably more so, therefore neither of them have the energy to go any further than that meaningful kiss. Eren closes his eyes as Jean’s thumb brushes his cheekbone.

“How ‘bout some sleep, hmm?” Jean speaks softly. “We can—um, continue this in the morning.”

Eren nods sleepily but doesn’t roll back over to his side of the bed, he shuffles down the bed slightly and presses his face into the crook of Jean’s neck. The blonde is now trapped in his spot with Eren tucked around him (he’s like a fucking koala sometimes). Jean tries to shift to get comfortable and somehow finds it easy to drift off to sleep.

 - - -

The next morning, Jean wakes up on his other side, Eren spooned behind him with an arm still draped over his waist, his hand riding up his shirt resting against his bare skin. Jean’s just glad he isn’t this clingy all the time when Eren sleeps, Jean would advocate for separate beds (he would never actually get separate beds, he couldn’t use Eren as a heater if he did). Slowly and quietly, Jean manages to slink out of Eren’s grasp and escape from his bed. He watches Eren unconsciously shift and relax onto Jean’s side of the bed. He only allows himself to stare for a minute or two before he shuffles out to head to the kitchen.

The coffee gets started and is brewing while Jean decides what he’s going to eat. He reaches into the cabinets and grabs the package of bagels. After he drops it in the toaster he stretches his arms over his head and yawns loudly. He starts thinking about last night, telling Eren he loves him (by accident). That is so not how he imagined telling him. He wanted to be smooth about it, make it a decent romantic moment to remember. Now his story is embarrassing, at least for him.  

Two things jolt him out of his thoughts, the bagel popping out of the toaster and familiar warm hands slipping under his t-shirt to wrap around his waist, again. Eren kisses the back of the blonde’s neck as Jean uses two fingers like tweezers to grab his bagel from the slots and then rests his chin on his shoulder. He can feel the muscles shift in Jean’s back as he smooths the cream cheese onto the freshly toasted breakfast.

“I love you too.” 

The teeth of the knife scrape loudly over the crusted edges of Jean’s breakfast. He said the words with so much calm certainty, like he’s been saying them for years. The words make Jean freeze and grip the handle of the knife in his stilled hand just to feel it pinch his skin from squeezing so tight. Jean assures himself that he is awake, and Eren just told him that he loved him too. 

Jean turns halfway, feeling Eren’s hands glide over his skin as he moves. Eren smiles at him shyly, glancing down and away before Jean sneaks a kiss to his cheek. He distracted enough to realize after it’s too late, Eren stole one of his bagel halves.

“Hey! That’s—“

Like a child, Eren licks around the bagel’s edge as he backs away to sit at the kitchen table.

“Ugh, never mind. It’s yours,” Jean sighs.

“Wow, really?” he asks incredulously.

Jean bites into the half Eren left behind and places down on his plate before he digs through the cabinet again to get another bagel.

“Your mouth has been on far dirtier things but you won’t eat a bagel I’ve licked?” Eren laughs when he sees Jean glare at him and smiles victoriously.

Another bagel is dropped into the toaster and Eren licks the cream cheese off his fingers. He gets up to stand behind Jean again, who is intensely staring at the toaster. The teasing fingers on his hips grabs Jean’s attention.

“Just so you know, you’re not leaving this apartment today.”

Jean partially looks over his shoulder. “And why’s that?”

Eren grins wickedly. “Cause after breakfast I’m dragging you back to bed and not letting you out until at least lunch time.”

Jean’s smirk is audible. “Then what about after lunch?”

“After lunch,” he pauses. “We’ll get creative.”

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for any mistakes, I'm still tired from traveling for Thanksgiving. Holidays wipe me out. I'll fix stuff probably at a later date.
> 
> I'm still taking votes on what chapter should be next.
> 
> Should it be:  
> 1\. Role reversal  
> 2\. Eren's MMA fight  
> 3\. Jean and Eren's first conflict in their relationship  
> 4\. Wax play  
> 5\. Your own suggestion (be it a scene idea, prop they use, etc. If I can't make a whole chapter about it, it might become an aside. I've got more of my own floating around in docs on my computer so there's a chance there will be more)
> 
> Tell me in the comments :)
> 
> \- - -  
>  **UPDATE: Feb 10th  
>  The votes have been tallied. The next chapter is role reversal! Thanks for all the feedback everybody :)**
> 
> **I have moved into my new place, I've been here for a little over a week and I have a lot of boxes to unpack still. But the chapter has been outlined and I'm hoping to get started writing soon but I don't have much down time between work, unpacking and sleeping. Once all the boxes have been unpacked I will have a lot more time. Maybe by the end of February or early March the next chapter will be up.**
> 
> **Thanks again for reading and voting, you guys are awesome!! Be back soon!!!**


	20. November, Year One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Role Reversal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy shit this is late! I am so so so sorry!!  
> I got stuck on this chapter a bit. I rewrote it almost 3 times before I was happy with it, and it still continued to change as I wrote out the final version. I apologize if the quality is crappy in some parts, I just really wanted to finish this. 
> 
> Side note: I finally gave this fic a proper summary. I figured it's been over a year, it's about time I posted what this fic is really about. 
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy this chapter and forgive me for being so late :(

It’s quiet. Sunday mornings usually are.

Outside, the only sound is an occasional car driving by or the neighbor’s dog barking to be let back in. Maybe the tweet of a cardinal or two.

But inside, it’s still.

In the living room, Jean is sitting in his armchair, one leg draped over the arm while his elbow rests on his thigh, reading an ebook on his tablet. His other hand hovers over his coffee mug that’s resting on the end table next to him, absentmindedly running his forefinger around the rim.

Jean has been awake since before the sun rose this morning. With it being so late in the year the mornings are still dark when he wakes up. The darkness outside just makes him wish he could roll over, snuggle into the warmth on the other side of the bed and fall back to sleep. But no such luck. He thought he would be proactive this morning and since he was already awake, he went for a run and coincidently got to watch the sun rise turning the sky from navy, to purple, pink, orange and almost back to bright blue by the time he returned.

Eren, of course, was still asleep, dead to the world and Jean walking around their bedroom and taking a shower in the attached bathroom.

Jean envied his sleeping abilities on most days.

Now, though, he’s content, sitting in his chair, reading with his morning coffee. The surroundings just disappear around him, sucked into the imaginary world in his hand.

His finger stops running along the top of the mug, and he hooks three of his fingers through the handle and brings the cup to his lips. The coffee isn’t as hot, just barely considered luke warm, but he drinks the last of it and sets the empty mug back down.

At the same time, he hears a door latch click echoing from upstairs. He hears bare feet shuffle along the hallway, followed by slow, heavy footfalls on the stairs, and shuffling again down the hall into the kitchen. A cabinet opens, then the fridge, liquid pouring into a glass, the fridge closes, and lazy feet scuff themselves across the floor.

Jean doesn’t look away from his tablet, simply listens to the sleepy life now roaming around the house.

Eren walks in still looking groggy from sleep, eyes squinting in the bright light of the room, bed head running wild, light bruises on his ribs from training visible on his bare chest, sweatpants (that probably belong to Jean) hang low on his hips. He slows his gate to take a sip of the orange juice he poured himself and then he walks to the corner to grab one of the few large floor pillows they have. Eren grips the corner in his fist and drags it along the floor and promptly dropping it at Jean’s feet. His knees crack as he eases himself down, sitting with his legs criss-crossed, then he leans back against the armchair behind him. Eren sighs heavily, comfy, and rests the side of his head on Jean’s thigh.

Without thought, Jean reaches for Eren’s head and begins to scratch and lightly twist his thick hair around his fingers. He smiles to himself when Eren hums and no doubt shuts his eyes, probably capable of falling back to sleep.

Actually Jean counts himself pretty lucky. He’s rarely seen Eren this comfortable around another person who wasn’t Armin or Mikasa, and now, he can add himself to that small list. Then again, dating for over a year and having a sexual relationship for longer, would kind of do that.

Eren loves letting Jean do this. He’s very sure that it is just an unconscious action at this point, if Eren’s head is within a certain distance of Jean’s hands, his long fingers will end up tangled in the mop of brown hair. It relaxes him to the point where his body feels heavy and numb, arms limp in his lap, his glass of orange juice completely forgotten.

They sit there together, quiet, while Jean finishes the chapter he’s on.

The tell tale click of the tablet informs Eren that Jean is done reading. He nuzzles Jean’s thigh softly and he hears Jean chuckle. His hand still hasn’t stopped. Once the tablet sounds like it is safely on the end table, Eren speaks.

“I’ve been thinking,” he begins.

“Hope you didn’t hurt yourself.”

Eren playfully smacks Jean’s shin with the back of his hand.

“Be nice or I won’t share.”

Jean huffs a laugh, but doesn’t say anything more.

“I’m ready to try the switch.”

That gets Jean’s hand to stop.

“Really?” he asks, surprised that’s where the conversation is going.

“Mhmm.”

Jean’s fingers twist in Eren’s hair one final time to get a firm grip before he tilts Eren’s head back and leans over him with a wicked smirk.

“What was the deciding factor?”

Eren lets his own smile creep across his lips.

“The thought of you tied to the new headboard.”

_Ah_ , Jean thinks, _go figure_.

Just two weeks ago they got a new headboard delivered. A tall, faux leather back cushion, framed by solid dark wood. A sturdy piece for sure. The day after they got it, Jean installed metal restraint rings on the side and Eren got to test them out that night. They worked like a charm. And ever since then, Eren couldn’t stop thinking about Jean struggling against the restraints.

Jean releases Eren’s hair, but the brunette keeps his head tilted back, and he drops his leg from the arm of the chair to surround Eren. He bends further, running his hands down his chest until his mouth is by Eren’s ear.

“Mmm, keep talking,” he purrs.

Eren snickers, “That’s about as far as I got.”

Jean sighs dramatically, pulling himself back up to sit properly in his chair.

“Well,” he says, “You’re off to a good start.”

“Figured we could decide the rest together.”

That gets Jean to smile. “So when were you thinking you wanted to do this?”

“Uh, not this weekend, but the next? Maybe this week we can decide what we want to do then over the weekend you can show me how to do stuff. That way I have a week to mentally prepare for it.”

“I think you’re making it out to be harder than it actually is.”

“Maybe.” Eren shrugs. “I just want it to be good. _I_ want to be good.”

“The fact that you want to try already makes it more than good. And if it’s like any other time I’m under you, then you shouldn’t worry at all.”

Even though Jean can’t see it, Eren smirks.

“Soo, next weekend then?”

Jean barely contains his grin, “Can’t wait.”

They are quiet for a beat, then Eren reaches back for one of Jean’s hands. Willingly, the blonde places his hand in Eren’s and watches as turns his head to bring the back of Jean’s hand to his lips and then proceeds to guide the hand back to the top of his head.

\- - -

Everything has been decided. The scene has been planned out, Jean showed Eren the proper way to use the toys they’ve picked out and gave him the safety talk. They agreed to use the same safe words, so there will be no confusion or second guessing. And Jean made sure that Eren understood his limits and how far he’s allowed to go— _Just remember how hard I smack you, then do the same to me_.

Eren was feeling pretty good about all this after the weekend. A bit nervous, sure, it’s the first time they’re trying this, but he’s also getting excited. It’s taken a lot for him to even get to this point.

They’ve talked about this for months, almost since the beginning of the year. Jean was extremely patient with him, but Eren could tell there were some days where he was antsy, maybe even losing patience. At one point, Eren decided that he was just going to do it, for Jean, because it’s what he wants. But he realized, that wasn’t a good enough reason to do this, Eren had to want to do this too, otherwise it wouldn’t be a fun experience, or a fair one.

So they waited.

And waited.

And waited, until the time was right.

Now, the moment is just a few days away.

One thing Eren realized though, Jean taught him how to use all the toys and tools, but not necessarily _how_ to be a Dom.

Honestly, Eren has no problem being antagonistic or playfully authoritative with Jean, but there’s a difference between that and dominating someone.

Despite all the topics Eren is comfortable talking to Jean about, asking him how to be a Dom feels weird, especially since Jean will be his sub.

Eren’s first thought was to talk with Hanji. They’re a switch, they’d know how to turn the mind set on and off and understand the transition from a sub to a Dom. The only downfall to talking to them would be that they’re only knowledge of Jean is him as a Dom. It would be hard to judge, or even guess, his submissive personality and how to possibly handle him.

He did have a second option, someone who has experience with Jean as a sub.

\- - -

Eren double checks the address on his phone, looks at the street sign and the numbers of the brownstones lining the street to see which direction they go. It’s a little cold to be walking outside tonight but he didn’t want to waste time trying to find a parking spot in a crowded residential area when the place was only a couple of blocks from the gym. He stands at the edge of the sidewalk, glancing both ways before he jogs across the street to the even numbered brownstones.

After about a minute of searching, he finds his destination.

He jogs up the steps and knocks briskly on the door before even noticing there was a doorbell. There is the sound of movement inside, so he doesn’t bother ringing it.

Eren hears the sound of several locks unlatching before the door is whisked open and a very casual Lexi stands inside it.

“Eren!” She quickly jumps to the side to let him in. “Come in, come in.”

He’s instantly warmed by the heat of her home and is thankful to be out of the chill.

“How’ve you been?” He greets.

“I can’t complain. Come on in, we’ll talk in the living room.”

Lexi leads him a little ways down the hall through an open doorway. Living room wouldn’t be the right words for the room, Eren thinks. Maybe a parlor. There are two couches facing each other. Two of the corners have comfy chairs taking up their spaces. One wall is a massive built in filled with books. And on the biggest wall, right in the center, is a fireplace. It’s a pretty formal sitting room.

She gestures to one of the couches for Eren to sit.

“Does Jean know you’re here?”

“Noo,” he says as he takes a seat.

Lexi shakes her head. “ _Tsk tsk_. If he finds out, he’ll probably punish you.”

Eren shrugs with a fond smile. “He punishes me for everything.”

She sits across from him, tucking her feet up under her. “I love that you still say that with a smile.”

Eren breathes out a light laugh, tilting is head down to watch his hands in his lap.

Lexi observes him, she hasn’t seen him really since their lunch with Jean back in April. Eren fascinates her, she sees a man of many sides. Someone who can be hard and fierce with perhaps a bit of deep aggression. But there’s a softness to him, gentle, caring and protective. He’s a strange compliment to Jean, but a compliment none the less.

“So what did you want to talk to me about?”

Lexi got a text from Eren yesterday to see if she was free to chat in person and it piqued her curiosity. They text back and forth every once in a while. It’s mostly Eren tattling on Jean when he’s not being nice. For someone so tough, he’s pretty adorable.

One corner of Eren’s mouth twitches. “Jean and I are going to do role reversal for our next scene.”

A broad smile stretches Lexi’s lips and she makes a giddy noise, clapping her hands excitably.

Eren continues. “We talked about what we are going to do and Jean walked me through how to use the toys properly and things to look out for. I feel ready to do this but, I just sort of realized I have no idea how to be a Dom.”

Lexi cocks her head to the side. “You didn’t want to ask Jean this?”

Eren covers his face with his hands. “I don’t know. I don’t have issues talking to him about anything but, it felt weird to ask him this.”

“To be honest,” she says leaning slightly forward, “Jean is the best person to ask. You’re only doing to be his Dom. Don’t you think it makes sense to ask him what he wants from you?”

“I guess.”

“I hope you don’t think I’m trying to scold you, because I’m not. But maybe before the scene just sit and talk with him about what he might want from you. I’m still glad to answer any questions you have though. There’s nothing wrong getting more than one perspective on how to be a Dom.”

“Thanks,” he means it sincerely.

Lexi grins brightly, “So! What do you want to know?”

They spend almost the next two hours going over “How to be a Dom 101”. She even tells him a few tips that he could use to surprise Jean, easy things that will grab his attention. Lexi didn’t give specific details on how to be a Dom for Jean since he was her sub years ago, his tastes could have changed. Plus Jean had asked Eren to dominate him, he’s not looking for another Lexi, he wants Eren. She reminds Eren of that fact, to be confident in himself and what he’s doing. And don’t forget that he’s in charge, drop the pleasantries, the please and the thank you’s, it’s his turn to demand.

By the time they are done, it’s starting to get late and even colder, so Lexi offers to drive Eren back to the gym to get his car. He gladly accepts.

She also makes him promise to talk to Jean before the scene. Eren tells her he’s going to do it when he gets home.

He keeps his promise.

\- - -

Jean has been lounging on the couch since he got home from work. His reasoning was to mentally unwind from a week of work, but really he was just feeling lazy and didn’t want to do anything on his chore list. It’s Friday anyway, who does things on a Friday.

He is in the middle of a home renovation reality show marathon when he hears the front door open. Eren’s home.

The lights turn on in the kitchen and Jean turns down the volume on the tv.

“There’s leftovers in the fridge for you,” he calls.

Eren opens the fridge and pulls out the plate of food. He removes the plastic wrap and stuffs the plate into the microwave and presses the reheat button. Then he walks curiously over to behind the couch.

“What are you watching?”

“HG TV.”

“That’s dangerous,” he laughs.

“Tell me about it.”

They both stare at the tv for a moment until Eren flicks Jean behind the ear before heading back into the kitchen.

“Hey!”

Jean rubs his ear between two of his fingers and hears Eren snicker as he walks away.

The microwave beeps loudly, yelling that the food is ready. Eren grabs the plate from inside and carries it to the island to sit and eat.

Peering over his shoulder, Jean sees Eren sit in the kitchen rather than join him on the couch. He leaves the tv on and slinks into the kitchen.

Eren doesn’t even flinch when cool fingertips creep under the back of his shirt, wandering aimlessly over his lower back. He briefly wonders if they’ll ever tire of each other’s skin, always reaching for some kind of contact, be it with innocent or devious intentions.

Jean leans down and kisses above Eren’s ear. He pulls away wrinkling his nose.

“You didn’t shower?”

Because his mouth is full, Eren hums a negative.

He swallows. “Mik was in a rush to get out tonight. It’s girls’ night apparently.”

“Ooh.” He sits in the stool next to Eren, looking him up and down with his eyes.

Eren pretends not to notice and keeps eating.

“You are gonna shower though, right?”

“Yeah, why?” Eren laughs. “Want to join me?”

Jean feigns disinterest and shrugs, suddenly finding the fraying edge of the place mat in front of him intriguing.

Eren watches his fingers pick at the threads and looks back up when he feels Jean looking at him again, a hungry flame reflected in his eyes.

“I won’t stop you if you want to.” He takes a bite of his food, slowly dragging the fork through his lips.

“Just eat your damn food.” Jean laughs.

He gets up to go back to the couch, leaving Eren to eat his dinner in peace.

The tv sucks Jean into another episode, he doesn’t hear Eren rinsing his plate and loading it into the dishwasher. It’s not until Eren is leaning onto the doorway, calling out to Jean, that he finally gets his attention.

“Hey! I’m getting in the shower, if you’re still interested.”

“Ok. Be up in a minute.” Jean doesn’t pull his eyes away from the tv.

Eren walks away, shaking his head.

The rumbling water pipes is what snaps Jean out of his house makeover trance. He shuts off the tv before he loses any more time.

As he walks through the kitchen he notices some dishes still left in the sink that Eren ignored putting in the dishwasher. He sighs, taking a short detour around the island and quickly adding them to the proper racks, then setting the dishwasher on a delayed start.

The sound of running water gets louder as Jean goes up the stairs. He strips off his shirt before he even walks into the bedroom. His pants and socks are gone and he walks into the bathroom with just his boxers.

Eren had left the bathroom door wide open, wholly expecting Jean to join him.

The blonde is greeted by the sight of Eren’s naked body, wet and dripping with white foamy suds behind a slightly foggy glass door. Eren is too busy with his face under the spray to notice Jean’s staring.

Jean slips his boxers off and approaches the shower. Steam curls over the top edge and the humid air rushes out when Jean opens the door and steps inside.

Eren whips his head around and flashes a smile that says he knew Jean couldn’t keep away. Like Jean would ever pass up this opportunity intentionally.

“‘Bout time you showed up.” Eren fully turns, ducking his head back under the water to get out any remaining suds. “Wasn’t sure if I was going to win out over a Spanish style ranch.”

Jean licks his lips watching water droplets run through the dips and valleys of Eren’s torso. “It was a close call.”

He flinches back when Eren swats water at him.

When Eren finishes wringing out his hair, he holds out a hand towards Jean and pulls him closer under the warm spray. He guides Jean’s arms around his waist then lifts his own arms to rest them on Jean’s shoulders. They exchange sweet kisses and spin in place so Jean ends up under the water and Eren runs his fingers through his hair to get it thoroughly soaked.

Eren pulls back. “Can I wash your hair?”

Jean snorts. “Sure.”

He reaches back for Jean’s shampoo and puts a good amount in his hands then rubbing them together to spread it evenly. Jean spins in place, tilting his head back. Eren begins to lather up Jean’s hair giving him a crown of foam. He switches massaging circles and scratching Jean’s scalp, listening to Jean hum when something feels particularly good. The shampoo gets rinsed out and Eren does the same thing with the conditioner.

The water begins to cool and the water pressure lessens thanks to the dishwasher kicking on no doubt. Jean leans on the wall in the back of the shower, watching Eren doing one final rinse before he gets out.

“So, are you ready for tomorrow?” he asks.

Eren turns the water off and looks back at Jean with a cocky grin. “Are you?”

He begins to close the small distance between them.

“Careful.” Jean warns with false gentleness. “I haven’t given you the reins yet.”

Eren presses closer, putting his arms up on either side of Jean’s shoulders. “What if I just _take_ them?”

Jean wants to grin ear to ear, but he keeps himself in check, only to play this game a bit longer. “I’d like to see you try.”

“You do know how easy it would be for me, right?” he smirks.

“Shut up. You’re ruining the illusion.”

Eren chuckles and leans in the rest of the way, nudging their noses together before their lips meet. Their mouths move slowly, smacking apart occasionally, but quick to dive back in. Eren sucks on Jean’s lower lip, his teeth graze and pinch as he releases it, painting it kissably red.

“Is this going anywhere tonight or is this all just a tease?”

“Am I gonna get a preview of tomorrow?”

Eren snorts, “No.”

Jean straightens up, standing at his full height, his signature sneer pulling one corner of his lips.

“Then go get on the bed. Don’t dry off.”

He sends Eren out with a smack on the ass and follows close behind.

\- - -  
Here’s the deal.

Eren is calling all the shots. He decides when the scene initiates, when the scales tip from neutral to Eren’s favor. Though the scene has been planned out, Eren decides what they do or don’t do. Everything is his decision, he’s in charge.

When Eren says go, Jean will be ready. There are only a few exceptions that they’ll both allow to delay the scene, but Jean is adamant on not letting any of them happen. He has been waiting patiently this long, he’s not going to let anything get in his or, more specifically, Eren’s way.

One thing neither of them won’t have to worry about, is Jean’s work. After falling ill over the summer from overworking, Eren made Jean promise to stop volunteering to go into work. If he gets a call from his superiors saying he has to go in, that is the only way Jean is allowed to leave for work on the weekends. No more running to the rescue when an idiot can’t figure out a wiring problem or when a minor system crashes. The weekend guys are just going to have to figure shit out themselves.

Or call Jean…on his day off.

Jean is on the phone when Eren comes home from his morning class. By the sound of it, Jean is trying to not scream in frustration at whoever is on the other end. The blonde is pacing in the living room, phone to his ear, his other hand in his hair in a tight grip.

Eren raises a questionable brow when their gazes meet. Jean shakes his head, eyes rolling in irritation. He walks back over to the back door, staring at the glass like it offends him.

“Look Tom, it’s honestly not a huge deal. Just wait it out for an hour for Nick to come in, he knows how to fix it.”

He pauses listening to Tom.

“Well tell them tough shit, they can sync their stupid excel sheets when the system is fixed.”

Another pause.

“Yeah ok. Just hang tight for Nick. I’ll talk to you Monday.”

The loud frustrated groan must mean Jean finally ended the call.

Eren leans against the living room entry way watching Jean with a knowing expression.

“You’re not going in,” he says sternly.

Jean looks back at him, walking away from the back door and plops himself down on the couch, tilting his head back on the cushions.

He huffs, “I know, I know.”

The floor creaks when Eren moves, walking around the couch to sit next to him.

Without looking away from the ceiling, Jean asks, “How was class?”

“Really good. The kids are amazing to watch sometimes.”

“Well they have an amazing teacher, it’s expected.”

Eren shoves Jean’s shoulder lightly. “Don’t get sappy on me Kirschstein.”

They sit in the silence of the room, soaking in the calm. It seems to be working for Jean, but Eren can feel his nerves starting to grow. He’s trying to remember everything that Lexi told him.

Stay calm. Stay confident.

He takes a breath and steels himself.

One second, he was sitting, the next, he’s in Jean’s lap, chests pressed close together, his hands running rough through dirty blonde hair, tongue delving deep in the other’s mouth.

Jean takes the attack in stride, matching Eren’s ferocity but ultimately lets Eren control. He slides his hands up and down Eren’s thighs on either side of him, then going further over his ass.

Eren hums against Jean’s lips, dropping his hands from his hair and easily reaching behind him, grabbing Jean by his wrists and holding them out to his sides. Jean probably couldn’t escape Eren’s hold if he tried.

Eren’s lips hover right over Jean’s. “Safe words?”

Jean can’t hide his grin, a grin that says _‘Yes! Finally!’_

“Red, yellow and green,” he breathes.

“And you agree to everything we’ve planned.”

“Yes.”

Eren tucks his face in the crook of Jean’s neck, scraping his teeth along his pulse and kissing the hinge of his jaw.

He speaks calmly and low in Jean’s ear. “I want you to go upstairs. Take off your clothes. Then you’re going to wait for me on your knees like a good boy.”

Jean feels a familiar shiver run down his spine, one he hasn’t felt in years. The sensation seems to linger, making his fingers twitch with excitement.

He nods his head and waits for Eren to remove himself before he jumps into action.

Eren watches him walk away, listens to his movements disappear up the stairs and down the hall into their room. He doesn’t give himself time to overthink anything, not his nerves, not his plan, he keeps going forward.

He packed a change of clothes in his gym duffle bag. Well, he packed a pair of pants, since that’s all he planned on wearing. The pants are really nothing special, dark grey denim but Jean once admitted that these pants made his mouth water so, Eren’s wearing them.

He changes right there in the hallway where he dropped his bag earlier and leaves his other clothes in a pile on top of the bag.

Jean is waiting patiently, dead center on the floor of their room facing the door. The laminate wood flooring is hard beneath his knees as he sits on his heels. He listens to the footsteps coming up the stairs, anticipation building with every footfall. His fingers open and close into a fist behind his back and rest in a relaxed position when he knows Eren is standing in the door frame.

The sight before him is one he never imagined clearly. Eren has imagined this scenario many times over the past few months and all he felt when he thought of Jean being submissive was that it would be “interesting”. Oh, but seeing him there on his knees, head tilted slightly down, looking up at him through his lashes with a fierce eager gaze, wearing nothing but…

Eren closes the door, not taking his eyes off Jean. He takes slow deliberate steps, walking heel to toe, until he’s right in front of his partner. He crouches low, just above Jean’s eye level.

“You know, when I said take off your clothes,” Eren runs a single finger along the waistband of Jean’s briefs, subtly hooking his finger over the top “I meant _all of them_.”

Eren pulls on the waistband and it snaps back before standing back up to his full height.

Jean briefly glances down where Eren’s finger just was and looks back up at him, his lip between his teeth and a raised brow.

He did it on purpose. A challenge.

He’s lucky Eren’s up for a challenge.

“Stand up,” he commands.

Eren looks Jean up and down as he stands, now he gets why Jean does it to him all the time. Watching the way every muscle moves, _god_ , especially in Jean’s legs, still toned from years of soccer and continuous running. A mental note is made to appreciate Jean’s body more often, Eren knows the blonde spoils him, he should return the favor.

There is something about the air around Eren that sends chills down Jean’s body. It’s threatening. Predatory. It’s a tiny bit like what Jean sees in him when he’s in the cage to fight. It screams power, strength..authority. His eyes though, they’re bright with devious thoughts. Honestly, it feels like a step up from the times they’ve had rough sex, that wild untameable fire and insatiable thirst. Jean has been waiting for this.

“Go bend over the bed.”

Just to antagonize him more, Jean licks his lips in a seductive manner as he holds Eren’s gaze, then walks the short distance to the end of the bed. Eren follows a step behind.

As Jean bends over Eren grabs his ass, a handful of flesh in each palm, and squeezes slowly. He hears Jean hum appreciatively.

Jean looks over his shoulder, “Now what?”

He’s met with a wicked smile. “Now, you’re going to ask me nicely to punish you.”

Pink begins to spread over Jean’s cheekbones, he hangs his head for a brief moment and then looks back again. He subtly shifts his feet to a wider stance, shoulder width apart.

“Punish me.” Jean smirks. “ _Please_.”

And just like that, it clicks. The appeal. Wanting someone under you, begging and pleading for pleasure. Eren only truly understood the submissive side to these games. Now he’s beginning to get a better understanding of the Dominant side.

Eren smooths his hands over Jean’s still fabric covered ass.

“You’re going to count them out.” Jean nods. “Color?”

Jean faces forward again. “Green.”

The brunette takes a step back, thankful that Jean isn’t looking at him right now as he collects himself. Stay confident.

Eren raises his hand and swings it down to make contact with Jean’s ass. He’s starting like he’s been taught, and has experienced, light warm up, then go harder.

“One.”

Two more warm up swings.

Jean grunts, “Three.”

Fingers pull on the elastic waistband, over the pink swell of Jean’s ass, and down his legs. As Eren rises up from his slight crouch he bites on the left side, where the fleshy part meets Jean’s hip. His mark.

“ _Shit_.” Jean laughs, peeking behind him.

Eren gives him a cheeky smile, a slip in character but that’s to be expected during one’s first time dominating.

The blonde shakes his head and looks forward again.

“Still green?” Eren asks.

“Very green.” Jean confirms.

The fourth strike stings. Bare hand to bare ass. Jean hisses through his teeth.

His skin is pleasantly warm, the surface is beginning to tingle. _Five_. Harder still, a cupped palm this time, the sound of a heavy thud instead of a smack. Jean stutters his count on this one. _S-s-six_. Groans filthily on the next one. _Seven_. Another stinger. _Eight_. He crosses his arms on the bed, lowers his forehead down onto his wrists and moans out _Nine_. Fuck just one more. Jean’s legs are starting to tremble, knees are weak. He gasps. _Ten_.

Eren shakes out his hand, palm stinging from every contact. He lightly smooths his hands over Jean’s bright red bare skin. Then he leaves a trail of light kisses up Jean’s spine.

“Color?” he asks, soft but still firm.

Jean swallows audibly, “Green.” He huffs a laugh. “ _Fuck_.”

Eren’s grin is evident in his voice. “Lie down on your back.”

He pulls away to get things out of the toy dresser. Jean crawls up on the bed and eases himself onto his back, the sheets feel cool against his skin, feels good.

Eren can feel eyes on his back, watching him as he grabs a couple of things from the drawers. Mentally, he runs through his checklist and nodding at each item in his hands. He’s got everything: lube, the straps, cuffs, and the vibrating cock ring. Now he just has to—

_Really?_ When he turns back around he sees Jean lounging on the bed, semi-propped up on the pillows, arms behind his head, legs fully extended out and crossed at the ankles. A slow grin spreads across his features, taunting.

Lexi said it best. He’s a brat.

Keeping eye contact, Eren slowly walks back to the bed and places the items beside Jean. The blonde briefly glances down and then back up, sucking on his bottom lip.

“Got something to say?” Eren says cooly.

Jean raises his eyebrows in mock surprise. “Not a thing.”

Eren gets back to work. He grabs one of the leather straps and attaches one end of it to the ring on the headboard.

“Give me your hand.”

The presented hand gets a leather cuff wrapped around the wrist and is then hooked onto the leather strap. Eren’s fantasy is becoming reality.

“Color?”

Jean gives the cuff a tight tug and rolls his wrist, checking the tension and the chance of cut off circulation. The leather straps creak under the stress but don’t give, it’s what they’re made for.

“Green.”

Eren goes to the other side, demands for Jean’s other hand and cuffs that wrist to the bed as well. Another green light.

Jean gets comfortable, sinking back into the pillows as Eren gets up on the bed and straddles his waist. He teases Jean’s chest with light touches before bracing themselves on either side his head, Eren’s body hovering over him, lips just inches away from each other.

“I have to admit, you look really fucking good like this.”

Eren can feel Jean’s lips curl into a smile when they kiss. It’s a small reassurance that he’s enjoying this, that Eren is doing well.

The sweetness of the kiss slowly diminishes, taken over by rough lust. Lips are nipped, bitten and pulled, bruised and slick. It’s so rare that Eren will actually tease in foreplay, but he does actually enjoy doing it. Watching bruises appear under his lips, peppered with bite marks ranging from pink to purple. And Jean, he bruises so easily with his pale complexion, he doesn’t mind getting marked up. He likes it. Eren likes that he can mark him anywhere, doesn’t matter if it can be covered up or not.

Jean shakily exhales when Eren finally touches him, callused fingers wrapped around his cock, doing nothing more than just touching. He tips his head back, feeling Eren’s lips go lower and lower. Every brush of his tongue or pinch of his teeth pushes him closer to the submissive edge, into the fog.

He blinks lazily when Eren sits up and reaches for the other items off to the side, leaving one hand still on Jean’s cock, thumbing the spot under the head and the thick vein leading up to it. Eren brings the cock ring into view, stretching the band out around his fingers. He asks for a color. With a relaxed grin Jean tells him to keep going, green.

Their position gets readjusted so Jean’s legs are bent on either side of Eren, a slim pillow gets slipped under Jean’s lower back and hips. A few more strokes and then Eren rolls the silicon cock ring down Jean’s length, all the way to the base, with the vibrator already snug in its slot, but he doesn’t turn it on yet.

Eren reaches for the bottle of lube and pours a decent amount over his fingers. He inches closer, his knees bumping into Jean’s thighs, the worn denim soft against his bare skin. The blonde sighs when Eren circles the first finger around his entrance, only rubbing the skin around it. Right as the Eren begins to push his finger inside, he clicks the vibrator on to the lowest setting.

Jean groans low in his throat and unconsciously, subtly, rolls his hips.

“Hold still.” Eren scolds, pushing his hand down on Jean’s hip.

Jean tries, he really does.

A second finger joins the first and the vibrator gets turn up another notch.

“ _Shit, yeah_.” His breathing is getting heavier, and his throat bobs when he swallows thickly.

Eren thumbs at the head of Jean’s cock, adding to the overbearing stimulation. Fingers barely teasing Jean’s prostate, the vibrator sending vibrations up the shaft, and Eren is enjoying every minute of watching Jean fall apart.

Three fingers, the vibrator gets set to the third, and final, notch.

Swears are whispered from Jean’s lips, moans get caught in his throat.

“ _Eren_.”

The brunette smirks, “Are you close?”

Jean meets his eyes, nods, biting his lip hard before a moan breaks free and his head falls back again.

“You going to come?” Eren leans forward, kissing Jean’s neck. He whispers, “Can you come for me just like this?”

“ _Ngh! Fuck, please._ ”

Eren curls his fingers just right and Jean’s back lifts off the bed in an arch and the leather straps rattle the metal hooks on the headboard.

He feels powerful. And oddly proud.

Jean feels lost. Beginning to feel overloaded by sensations, which is exactly what he wanted. He’s right on the edge. his release is so close he just—

Eren’s mouth is on his upper chest, his teeth scrape against his collar bone, then he licks and sucks on the spot where his neck meets his shoulders.

“ _Ahhh! Shit fuck_.”

His orgasm tears through him, his body shakes from its intensity.

The vibrator stops and Eren slowly eases his fingers out so he can use both hands to roll the cock ring off.

Jean lies completely limp on the bed, his limbs feel like jell-o. Each of Eren’s light touches shocks him.

Eren kisses his cheek and his lips. “Color?”

“Green.” he breathes.

“You’re gonna give me one more. Can you be a good boy and do that for me? Hmm?”

Jean rasps, “Yeah.”

He lies back, catching his breath, as Eren pushes his pants down, bunching them up on his calves and ankles. Eren scoots even closer, propping Jean’s thighs on top of his and then reaching for the lube again to coat his cock. The excess he wipes on the sheets and then runs his warm hands down Jean’s thighs, coaxing them wider. Eren glances up and checks on Jean’s hands, making sure there are no signs of cut off circulation. The fact the Jean is opening and closing his fists is a good sign.

Eren presses in nice and slow, listening, waiting. Jean tenses up for a second but immediately relaxes himself, sinking into the bed even further, sinking into the pleasure about to come.

His hands are scorching Jean’s hips, fingers press against him with reassurance and promise. Jean manages to cross his legs behind Eren’s back, pulling him in that much closer.

The pace starts slow, shallow thrusts more along the lines of grinding more than anything else. Jean’s body jolts when his nerves are hit just right, just a fraction of a second of fully concentrated bliss.

“More, _please_.” Jean whines.

Eren grabs hold on Jean’s legs as they unhook behind his back. He pushes them towards the bed, his hands gripping the back of his knees, bending Jean almost in half.

_God, he’s flexible, shit_.

Their hips slam together, the pace is faster, rougher, a little brutal. Jean’s ass is sure to be a little bruised tomorrow from this pounding and the spanking from earlier, and if that doesn’t excite him enough…well, it does excite him enough actually.

Jean is holding onto the straps with tight fists, the pleasure building again bordering along painful but it feels so fucking good.

Eren watches Jean completely let go, giving his body up to sensation of the overwhelming variety. His voice cracks, unable to finish Eren’s short one syllable name.

His second release feels just as powerful, if not more than, the first. Come oozes slowly out of his softening cock and his insides clench down on Eren’s cock still inside him. Eren is right on the edge himself but he doesn’t want to risk hurting Jean further so he pulls out and begins to roughly fist his own cock, his orgasm spilling out on Jean’s stomach.

The brunette stares at the sight in front of him and sighs, sated. Jean has gone completely slack on the bed, chest is rising and falling quickly, still trying to catch his breath. Beautifully disheveled are the words that come to mind when looking at Jean.

Jean swallows, “ _Fuck_.”

Eren snorts, breaking character for good for the rest of the day. He kicks off his pants the rest of the way and then crawls over Jean to undo the cuffs of each of his wrists.

Arms drape over Eren’s shoulders as he bends to kiss every bruise he left behind on Jean’s shoulders and neck. Jean can’t help but let his grin take over his features and tug Eren closer. Eren giggles, feeling the warm slickness between their two bodies. When his lips reach Jean’s he kisses him like he has all the time in the world.

“I love you, so fucking much.” Jean says between kisses.

Familiar warmth spreads across Eren’s cheeks and he ducks his face into the crook of Jean’s neck as he whispers his return sentiments.

Eren is tempted to lie there with Jean for hours, maybe days, until it’s impossible to tell whose limb is who’s. They, unfortunately, do need to get clean though.

He begins to pulls away but Jean wraps his arms tighter around his shoulders.

“I’m just going to start the bath, I’ll be right back.”

Jean groans. “Just—one more minute.”

Eren smirks, “Since when are you a cuddle fiend.”

Jean’s only response is to shush him.

He gets his one minute, then Eren peels himself away to set everything up in the bathroom. While the bath fills, Eren comes back into the room and removes the straps from the headboard and puts all the items they used on top of the toy dresser to clean later. He checks on the bath and goes to help Jean off the bed where he’s doing a great impression of a starfish.

“Can you walk or do you need me to carry you?”

Jean sighs, finally sitting up and swinging his legs over the edge of the bed. Eren holds out a hand and pulls him up. Their hands stay laced together as they walk into the bathroom. Eren hands Jean a warm cloth to wipe his stomach and chest before he gets in the tub.

Eren turns off the main light once Jean is settled in the water and allows the dimmer shower light to illuminate the room is a cozier glow.

“Scoot,” he waves his hand at Jean telling him to move forward.

Jean bends his knees sliding out of the way as Eren settles in and then sinks back into him. They stay quiet as the tub continues to fill for a few minutes longer. Eren reaches to shut the water off when it reaches the right height, the it’s just the sound of the water echoing off the titled walls every time it drips off their skin.

Lips softly brush the tops of Jean’s shoulders and Eren presses his nose along his pulse and then kisses the hinge of his jaw. Jean reaches back and lazily scratches at the hair behind Eren’s ear. In return, Eren nuzzles the side of Jean’s head, resting his forehead right above his ear and secures Jean’s waist with his arms.

“Remember when I came home late the other night,” he begins.

Jean hums.

“I lied about where I was.”

Jean smirks. “I know you did.”

Eren smiles guiltily. Of course Jean already knew he was lying. Eren still can’t lie worth a damn.

“I went to talk to Lexi.”

“Really?” Jean laughs.

“Yeah—Why are you laughing?”

“Because! She probably had a field day having you all to herself.”

“She was very enthusiastic, yes.”

Jean calms down. “What did you talk about?”

Eren won’t lie. “I had questions about being a Dom and I wanted her advice.”

Jean leans his head back on Eren’s shoulder and closes his eyes. “I’m sure she had a lot of stories.”

“Yeah.” Eren shrugs. “But not about you, if that’s what you meant.”

“Hmm. I’m surprised.”

“She told me she could have shared a ton of stories about you, but they were all a long time ago. You could’ve changed and like completely different things.” he pauses for a moment. “Plus, I think I’d rather you tell me the stories.”

Jean smiles. “I’ll share whenever you want to hear one.”

Eren hugs Jean even closer to him and Jean doesn’t protest in the slightest.

“Maybe later,” he mumbles into his skin.

\- - -

Another cold morning.

Jean knows as soon as he lifts the covers he’ll be greeted by the arctic air. Not exactly the wake up call he wants, but he does need to get out of bed.

He sits up and as he is about to throw his legs over the edge an arm comes from behind and wraps around his middle, tugging him backward.

Eren shuffles closer once he has Jean down. He drapes a leg over his hip and curls his arm up on his chest, then tucks his head in the crook of his neck.

Jean sighs, “Didn’t think you were awake.”

“Barely,” he mumbles, still half asleep.

“Then go back to sleep.”

Eren whines.

The blonde pats him arm and wiggles free from Eren’s sleepy grasp. Eren rolls onto his back and rubs his face.

“I should’ve just kept you tied to the bed,” he says low to himself.

Jean smirks over his shoulder, “Maybe next time.”

He slides into a pair of sweatpants and grabs a sweatshirt from the pile on the floor and walks out of the bedroom. Eren’s groan can be heard all the way down the hall.

As usual, by the time the coffee is done, Eren drags himself into the kitchen. He follows Jean into the living room, and just like two weeks ago, he grabs a floor pillow from the corner and sits in front of Jean in his chair. Fingers almost immediately tangle themselves in his hair.

“Did you like last night?”

Eren takes the first sip of his coffee. “Yeah, I did. _A lot_.”

Jean smiles. “Would you do it again?”

The brunette gnaws on his lips. “Y-yeah.”

He hesitated.

“But?”

Eren sighs through his nose and Jean’s smile falls slightly.

“Is is selfish of me to want to keep the dynamic that we have? I mean—I _did_ enjoy last night. I _really_ did. I just don’t know how often I could do that.”

Jean relaxes slightly. “It’s ok. I didn’t expect you to become a switch overnight. I don’t expect you to become a switch _at all_.” He rests his hand on Eren’s head. “Our dynamic won’t change. Just…maybe every once in a while, when we’re both up for it, we can try it again?”

Eren smiles fondly, though Jean can’t see it. “That sounds fair.”

His hair gets tugged lightly.

“Come up here.”

He glances over his shoulder with a smirk and places his coffee on the table in front of him. Eren crawls into Jean’s lap, knees on either side of his hips and Jean’s arms wrapped around his waist.

They kiss until their coffees have gone cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly don't know when I'll get the next chapter out. It's probably best to assume it will be in a few months. I'll be traveling for parts of May and June and I have some other personal projects I'm working on outside of writing that I need to get done within a certain time frame. I'll probably will be writing snip-its here and there to keep my mind in the story, although it's pretty much always there anyways. Please continue to be patient with me like you have. You guys have been nothing but sweet and I can't tell you how much I appreciate that. 
> 
> As always, thanks for reading :)


	21. Late May, Year Zero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren is awkward and a little shit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was completely unplanned. I came across spoilers for the next chapter in the snk manga and I had to find a way to keep away from tumblr. I should have been working on my other project but this idea came to me and I wrote it thinking it would become an aside later on but I just couldn’t stop. So here, have a surprise chapter. 
> 
> This was written in only a few hours with practically no editing, I'm sorry.

They’ve had five scenes.  
  
    Five really _really_ good scenes.  
  
    Eren gives Jean all the credit, he’s come up with every single detail of the last five scenes. And here he is sitting on his couch after work reading his next one. Jean handed him his journal when he walked in, told him to read over his idea for the next scene. Their sixth scene.  
  
    Doesn’t take long to read it over. Next scene includes a couple yards of rope, a blindfold, a bullet vibrator and some clothes pins. Two things on that list would be new for Eren, the rope and the clothes pins. Jean said he’d introduce Eren to rope binding slowly, he assumes this will be the introductory scene. The other thing, or things, are the clothes pins.   
  
     _Really? Clothes pins? What’s he going to do torture me by hanging his laundry? Fuck that._  
  
    Honestly, Eren was hoping for a little _more_ for their next scene. Something like _actual_ fucking. They’ve been doing this for two months, almost, and he doesn’t see it ending anytime soon (though they still haven’t talked about an end date). Knowing Jean, he’s probably waiting for Eren to ask, which is the respectable thing to do, but Eren he’s—he’s awkward when he has to ask.  
  
    Jean has no problem talking about anything D/s related, or anything sexual for that matter. When it comes to sharing his sexual exploits with friends, he’s tight lipped, but for the sake of creating an open and honest environment for him and his subs, he’ll talk about anything. It’s something Eren appreciates and admires, something he wishes he could do and he’s trying to be more open and Jean is trying to help him get there.  
  
    Eren breathes in some courage and goes to talk to Jean.  
  
    He wasn’t far, just in the kitchen loading up the dishwasher.  
  
    “Hey Jean?”  
  
    The blonde briefly glances in Eren’s direction. “Yeah?”  
  
    Eren reaches to scratch the back of his head, a nervous gesture that Jean surely can recognize. “You see us doing this for a while right?”  
  
    Jean raises a curious brow. “Yeah,” he says again.  
  
    “Is actual sex going to come into play?” It comes out only a little rushed.  
  
    Jean closes the dishwasher and sets it to start. “Last I checked what we’re doing is _actual_ _sex_.”  
  
    He knows what Eren meant.  
  
    “God damn it,” he breathes.  
  
    Eren stares at Jean in hopes of Jean starting the conversation. All he gets is crossed arms and a devilish smirk.  
  
    “ _Sex_ , Jean. Anal sex.” Eren raises and drops his arms against his sides, a gesture asking _happy now?_  
  
    Jean’s smirk widens to a grin. “It can be added when you can openly talk about it. Can you handle that?”  
  
    Eren cringes. “What’s there to even talk about? Can’t we just—“ He tries to find words but they fall flat.   
  
    “Add it in?” he finishes lamely.  
  
    “No.” Jean’s answer is very serious and very certain.  
  
    The brunette throws his head back dramatically, sighs, then proceeds to shuffle back to the couch. Jean follows.  
  
    They’ve done a lot of things already. Jean has literally touched almost every inch of Eren. His hands don’t feel like stranger’s hands. His mouth doesn’t feel like a stranger’s mouth. He’s comfortable with Jean so naturally he wants to go further but he doesn’t grasp why Jean has to make a big deal out of it, especially considering how far they’ve already gone.  
  
    BDSM, despite the wildly popular and accepted belief, isn’t always about sex. People participate in non-sexual play and feel just as satisfied. Jean knew that wasn’t the kind of relationship he was entering with Eren. Did he think they were going to have sex at some point? Yes. Did he _expect_ it? No.   
  
    Sex with other subs has been no big deal. But this is _Eren_. Even though they have separated their friendship from their D/s relationship, one does sort of affect the other. If they have sex as Dom and sub it’s still them having sex. There’s no turning back after going that far. Jean wants to make sure Eren understands that. And Eren says he does. He already thought it over when he was considering being a sub for Jean, he knows what he signed up for. For everything.  
  
    Once that’s covered, they decide where sex fits in inside a scene. Is it a reward? A punishment? Or just part of the game? Eren tells Jean he’s had it as a reward in the past, but a majority of the time it’s just been part of the scene. Both agree that using it as a punishment is a hard limit. There’s a difference between punishing sex and sex as a punishment. Punishing sex is rough, it hurts in a good way. Punishment makes it sound non-consensual and neither are comfortable with that.  
  
    For most of this conversation, Jean is the one talking. Eren will answer questions when asked but for the most part he still is awkward about talking this over.  
  
    “Why is talking about it so hard for you? Did you _never_ talk to your other Doms?”  
  
    Eren sighs. “We talked. We just never—You’re the only guy I’ve been with who has been completely thorough and open about it.”   
  
    It clicks with Eren then that maybe that’s why he enjoys being with Jean so much. He takes the time to understand Eren’s wants and fulfills them.   
  
    “How else are you suppose to understand your partner if you don’t talk to them?”  
  
    “In case you haven’t noticed, I never stayed with any of them very long.”  
  
    He was always under some kind of contract when he was with other Doms. His longest contract was a little over two months.   
  
    It’s almost been two months with Jean.  
  
    The blonde studies him for a moment and continues asking questions. Questions like what positions Eren is most comfortable in. Eren makes a dramatic uncomfortable noise, but answers Jean’s question.  
  
    “On all fours or on my side, I guess.”  
  
     _Curious_.  
  
    “Can I ask a personal question?” Jean asks slowly.  
  
    “Aren’t all of these personal questions?” Eren challenges.  
  
    Jean just gives him a look.  
  
    Eren sighs. “Yeah fine, what?”  
  
    “Are those positions comfortable for you because you don’t have to look at your partner, or is it just physically more comfortable?”  
  
    Eren stills. Honestly, he’s never thought of it that way. He’s had sex face to face with Doms before, it wasn’t really a problem. Though not facing them sometimes made it easier.  
  
    “I guess kind of both, but more for being physically comfortable.”   
  
    Jean nods.  
  
    “Just because I like those positions doesn’t mean those are going to be the only ones, does it?”  
  
    Jean shakes his head no. “Not unless you tell me so.”  
  
    “I’m open to pretty much everything.”  
  
    “I’ve noticed.” Jean smirks.  
  
    A light blush colors Eren’s cheeks. “So, when are you going to add it in?”  
  
    “When you actually say you’re ready.”  
  
     _I thought that’s what this whole conversation was about!_ Eren thinks.  
  
    He quickly thinks back to his original question. He’d only asked _if_ they were going to have sex, not _when_. Jean is tricky and Eren is learning.  
  
    “I’m ready.” he confirms.  
  
    Jean studies Eren briefly. “I’ll add it into the scene after this one then.”  
  
    He looks away at the journal left open on the coffee table.  
  
    “Did you have any questions about this weekend’s scene?”  
  
    Eren glances in the same direction and nods. “What’s the deal with the clothes pins?”  
  
    Jean’s eyebrows jump in surprise. “You’ve never played with them?”  
  
    “Yeah, when I was like five helping my mom with the laundry.”  
  
    “This would be nothing like that.” Jean snickers and gets up to head into the bedroom.  
  
    Eren does not follow. On days where they don’t have a scene, Eren doesn’t go into Jean’s bedroom unless instructed or asked because whatever it is can’t be taken out of the room.   
  
    Jean comes back with a handful of clothes pins and sits back down next to Eren.  
  
    “Give me your arm,” he demands.  
  
    Eren does.  
  
    One by one, Jean pinches the skin on his forearm with the pins, making a line of eight up his arm.  
  
    “These would probably stay nicer if you had more fat on your body,” he says as one pin loses its grip and falls off.  
  
    Eren raises a challenging brow. “You’re the last person I thought would ever complain about my body.”  
  
    Jean pouts. “I’m not.”  
  
    The blush spreading across his cheeks doesn’t go unnoticed. The multitude of times Jean has glanced or stared at Eren’s body outside of their scenes hasn’t gone unnoticed either.  
  
    Eren hums and then looks down at the pins on his arm. Yeah they pinch, but it’s not painful, it’s barely annoying.  
  
    “This is it?” he asks.  
  
    Jean shrugs but his lips stretch into a smirk again. “Kind of. It would be your dick instead of your arm though.”  
  
    Eren’s eyes widen. This is definitely not like helping with laundry.  
  
 - - -  
  
    That weekend’s scene consisted of tying Eren to the bed by his wrists with the rope (first step to rope bondage), blindfolding him, running a bullet vibrator up and down the shaft of his cock while it was still trapped under his cotton briefs. Jean watched as the outline grew bigger under the tight fabric and smiled with sick satisfaction as a wet spot began to form.  
  
    Jean pulls the briefs off, dragging them down Eren’s legs then kneels between them, pushing his legs further apart. He reaches for the pile of clothes pins beside him and watches as Eren swallows at hearing the noise. A hand reaches for Eren’s cock and slowly pumps up and down. Jean tells Eren he’s about to begin and asks for a color. Green.  
  
    He starts low on the shaft, just above the ball sack. Eren winces and hisses but doesn’t call either of the stopping safe words. Jean cinches another and another until a line of ten pins pinch the underside of Eren’s cock. He’s informed they will stay on for ten minutes.   
      
    Doesn’t sound like a long time but in the end, Eren wasn’t sure if he wanted the time to go by faster or slower. Jean spent the entire ten minutes sucking and biting bruises into his inner thighs. It’s Eren’s favorite place to find bruises later, whether or not Jean actually knows that remains unknown but it’s possible he’s catching on.  
  
    The pins come off slowly, one by one. Then Jean tucks his knees under Eren’s thighs and coats two fingers with lube. After another green from Eren, he circles his entrance and slides one finger. A couple of seconds go by and he pushes in the second. Jean strokes his own cock watching Eren writhe in front of him, watching ever contoured muscle under that tight skin. One of these days he’s going to drag his mouth over every inch of Eren’s body. He’ll either tie him up or have him lie spread-eagle and order him not to move. The thought of that fantasy makes Jean’s hand work faster and press against Eren’s prostate harder.   
  
    Eren’s back arches and Jean’s fingers slide in deeper. “ _Aw fuck. Please_ let me come.”  
  
    The assault on his nerves continues.  
  
    “ _Ahh! Sir!_ I can’t—“ A moan cuts him off.  
  
    Eren’s fists tighten in their restraints. He can’t come until Jean says he can.  
  
    “You _fucker_ ,” he hisses between his teeth.  
  
    He hears Jean laugh and those fingers press harder still.  
  
    “ _Ssssshit_. Please, let me come Sir.”   
  
    Jean is quiet for a moment. Eren can hear his hand jacking himself off and, _god_ , he wishes he could see Jean’s face.   
  
    The blonde groans, he’s close too. “You can come.”  
  
    It used to be such a rare thing to come untouched. Not so much anymore, Jean seems to have the magic non-touch. This is their sixth scene and it’s happened in three of them. First time was a shock. The second, a pleasant surprise. This time, he’s not surprised, just extremely relieved.  
  
    Eren’s leg go limp on either side of Jean and he feels the boy shift between his legs reaching for the rope around his wrists. When the first hand comes free Eren pushes the blindfold off his eyes and is greeted by Jean’s chest right in his face. he glances up at his hand just as Jean finishes untying the knot. Eren lets Jean take his hands and inspect them then rub his wrists to soothe out the rope marks.  
  
    “What do you want?” Jean asks quietly.  
  
    He doesn’t really plan the aftercare, he’ll mostly let Eren decide what he needs when the scene ends.  
  
    The boy sighs heavily, taking back his hands and running them through his hair, further dislodging the blindfold and throwing it off to the side.  
  
    “I want another scene.”  
  
    Jean sits back on his heels, surprise written across his face. “You’re kidding right?”  
  
    “Nope.” Eren looks back at him asking, not demanding and not challenging.  
  
    Jean has done two scenes in one day before, it’s not completely unheard of. This would be the first time with Eren.  
  
     _Shit, what would we even do?_ Jean could go for another round, he’s just—where would they start. This is throwing him off. Eren is throwing him off.   
  
    Eren shifts, legs subtly tightening around Jean’s hips. “Could we do what you planned for next week?”  
  
    Jean meets Eren’s eyes. He’s not talking about the entire scene, just one aspect of it.   
  
    Is it just sex at this point if that’s all they do? How can Jean quickly make that a full scene or at least more like a scene. He won’t restrain Eren again (he never would the first time sex comes up with a sub anyway). He could be rough with Eren.  
  
     _Or you could just ask you idiot._  
  
    He asks carefully, “What else would you want?”  
  
    Eren thinks for a moment, going quiet. He turns his head to stare at the dresser across the room hoping it will give him some ideas.   
  
    While his eyes are still focused on the dresser he asks, “Do you have any leather gloves?”  
  
    “Yeah.”  
  
    Eren turns his head back towards Jean. “Would you spank me with them on?”  
  
    He’s so much easier to talk to after a scene. Why can’t he always be like this?  
  
    “Before, during, or after I fuck you?” Jean leans forward, bracing his hands on either side of Eren’s waist.  
  
    His body shifts under Jean’s stare. “Before or during.”  
  
    Jean chews on the inside of his cheek. he can work with this. He crawls off the bed and heads for the dresser. First he pulls out a pair of leather gloves, they’re short and will cut off right at his wrist. Second thing he pulls out is a condom. _Fuck_ , they’re really going to do this.  
  
    Jean stands beside the bed, eyes meeting Eren’s as he slides on just one glove over his left hand.   
  
    “You change your mind, let me know and we’ll stop.”  
  
    Eren nods. “I’m ready,” he reassures.  
  
    Jean curls his left hand into a fist, listening to the leather crackle.  
  
    “Safe words?”  
  
    Eren’s mouth curls upward. “Red, yellow, green.”  
  
    Jean twirls a single finger. “Roll over.”  
  
    As Eren rolls onto his stomach Jean climbs back onto the bed. He kneels between Eren’s legs again and smooths his gloved hand over Eren’s lower back and up his spine. The body under his hand shudders. He adds a tiny bit of pressure to the center of his upper back.  
  
    “Scoot your knees up.”  
  
    Jean’s hand keeps Eren’s upper body pinned down as he lifts his ass into the air. The blonde covers three of his fingers with lube this time and circles one of them over Eren’s hole.   
  
    “Color?”  
  
    “Green.”  
  
    He pushes in two fingers, one right after the other. A leather thumb brushes lightly along the side of Eren’s neck and he groans in response. Then Jean pushes in the third finger, thoroughly stretching Eren out in preparation.   
  
    When his fingers leave Eren empty, Eren’s ears prick up at the sound of a foil packet.   
  
    “Color?” he asks again.  
  
    Eren takes a millisecond to ask himself if he’s really ready. Does he want to do this?  
  
    “Green.”  
  
    The foil packet rips open. Jean must have used his teeth because his other hand has not left Eren’s neck. He rolls the condom on one handed, wipes his hand on the sheet and then reaches for the second glove. He has to remove his hand from Eren’s back to slide on the snug glove.

  
    As he does that, Eren readjusts so his upper body is partially lifted off the mattress, propped up on his elbows. He looks back over his shoulder when two leather hands grip his hips, a brow raised in challenge. Eren knows better than this, he shouldn’t antagonize Jean.   
  
    Something wicked passes through Jean’s features and a hand comes down hard on Eren’s ass and squeezes after the impact. Eren lets a moan fall out and rests his forehead on his wrists. Another hand comes down on the other cheek. He bites back his groan.   
  
    Jean rests a hand on Eren’s lower back and guides his cock with two fingers on his other hand. Eren feels the head of Jean’s cock brush against his skin but it goes no further than touching.  
  
    “Ready?”   
  
    “Yes Sir,” he breathes.   
  
    Jean begins to push in and Eren bites down on his lower lip then lets out a held breath.  
  
     _Breathe_ , he reminds himself.  
  
    Jean felt him tense up, “Relax.   
  
    He doesn’t say it like a command.  
  
    The hand on Eren’s lower back rubs soothingly over his skin. It’s only another moment or two and Eren relaxes. Jean continues to ease in. Once he’s halfway, he pulls a little bit and starts pushing in further. Eren groans quietly as Jean starts, keeping movement slow and shallow. The brunette reaches back, gripping Jean’s thigh. Jean stills and Eren’s grip loosens.  
  
    “You good?”  
  
    Eren takes his hand back. “Yeah just—keep going.”  
  
    He won’t say he just wanted to touch him. Eren acted before he thought, that was all.  
  
    Jean adjusts his stance, shifts a little closer, spreads his knees a little wider pushing against Eren’s legs. One hand stays on Eren’s hip, the other glides up Eren’s spine again indicating he should lie back down. Eren does as he’s tacitly told.  
  
    Their hips grind together for another minute. Eren doesn’t notice when the hand on his hip leaves. It’s only when another hard smack lands on his ass that he realized it left. He already forgot about this part of the game and he gasps loudly at the impact. The next slap is timed with a rough thrust from Jean’s hips. Eren likes this game.  
  
    The blonde only spanks hims few more times and just continues to fuck Eren at a quick pace. Lude sounds fall from Eren's lips. Jean's gloved hands grip the flesh of Eren’s hips as he pounds into him. Eren pushes himself up onto his hands and actively starts pushing himself back against Jean’s thrusts. Jean allows it…briefly. He leans forward, his chest covering Eren’s back, one hand braced next to Eren’s and the other slithering its way up Eren’s chest to his collarbones.   
  
    Jean bites on his ear. “Did I say you could move?”  
  
    “No Sir, you did not.” Eren smiles guiltily, he’s asking for it. “You didn’t say I had to stay still either.”  
  
    Jean will admit to himself that he likes it when Eren misbehaves.   
  
    Eren can hear the smile in Jean’s voice. “That’s strike two. One more and I won’t let you come.”  
  
    His brows furrow, confused. “What was strike one?”  
  
    “Strike one was not being satisfied with the first scene you were given.”  
  
    “I wouldn’t have asked for another one if I was satisfied by the first one.”  
  
    He’s on thin ice now and Eren knows it. He’s also hoping Jean won’t take him seriously. The first scene was great, as always, he’s just being greedy now.  
  
    “One more word _Eren_ , and I call it.”  
  
    Eren bites on his lip, tempting to test Jean’s threats but he’s pretty sure he’ll actually fall through with them and he does actually want to come.  
  
    “Yes Sir.”  
  
    Jean backs off, pressing a gloved hand on Eren’s back so he’ll lower himself down again, then proceeds to fuck Eren hard until he’s sore, brainless and panting.  
  
 - - -  
  
    They lie there for moments afterward. Jean’s on his back, arms behind his head, chest still rising and falling heavily. Eren lets out a tired groan and turns over onto his back. Jean hears his intake of breath.  
  
    “If you say you want another scene after that I will hurt you.”  
  
    Eren laughs, or scoffs, or both. “Was gonna say thank you.”  
  
    Jean turns his head to the side. “Why? You’ve never thanked me before.”  
  
    Eren looks back, “Because you never fucked me before.”  
  
    “Do you thank all the people who fuck you or—“ he lets that playful question hang.  
  
    Turning back to look at the ceiling, Eren smiles and stretches. “Only the ones who do it right.”  
  
    Jean’s expression is shocked and a little smug.  
      
    Eren quickly turns and points at him, “Don’t let that go to your head.”  
  
    Jean just laughs.  
  
    The brunette stands up and goes to his pile of clothes on the floor. He sends off a text to Armin letting him know he’ll be coming home late and won’t be there for dinner.  
  
    “Can we get food?” Eren asks.  
  
    Jean makes no move to get up, still lying with his hands behind his head. “What do you want?”  
  
    Eren slithers back onto the bed, pressed up against Jean’s side.  
  
    “Either pizza or Thai.”  
  
    “ _Pizza_ can be delivered. We’d have to go out for Thai.”  
  
    “Fine. We’ll get pizza for your lazy ass.”  
  
    Jean reaches out and flicks Eren’s ear. “You got _two_ scenes out of me today, I have the right to be lazy.”  
  
    “Whatever,” Eren rolls his eyes lightheartedly. “I’m going to get in the shower.”  
  
    When he doesn’t move right away, Jean peaks over at him and sees Eren giving him an expectant expression.  
  
    “What?”  
  
    Eren nods towards the bathroom. “Wanna join me?”  
  
    Jean laughs through his noise.  
  
    “I’ll let you scrub me down.”  
  
    Eren is getting good at reading Jean, not quite on par with how Jean can read him, but he knows when his body is being appreciated.  
  
    Biting down on the corner of his mouth, Jean agrees. “Fine.”  
  
    With a wicked grin Eren slides off the bed and Jean follows him to the bathroom.  
  
    The shower gets turned on and Eren waits a few seconds before reaching his hand under the spray to test the temperature.   
  
    Jean notices the marks on Eren’s inner thighs from earlier. “Do you want the gel for your thighs?”  
  
    Eren glances down between his legs, the marks are already violently burgundy. He looks back up.  
  
    “No.”  
  
    The water must be warm enough because Eren ducks into the shower. A heavy breath escapes Jean’s lungs, he’s unsure why he was holding his breath in the first place. He shakes his head, grabs a small hand towel off the shelf and joins Eren under the water.  
  
    Eren wasn’t kidding when he said he’d let Jean wash him. Pretty much as soon as Jean steps in Eren hands him the soap. While Jean runs the soaking, soapy cloth over Eren’s skin, he feels tempted to kiss and lick at Eren’s slick skin. They never talked about after scene or aftercare affection, so he just sticks to what Eren asked him to do.  
  
    Once Eren is clean Jean kicks him out to go call for a pizza and Jean finishes his shower alone. When he gets out Eren is out in the living room, dressed, and watching TV. He already ordered the pizza and it will be there in less than a half hour.  
  
    Jean sits on the couch and Eren lies down on his side with his head on a pillow resting against Jean’s thigh. _This_ they have talked about. Jean rests his arm on Eren’s shoulder and gently scratches the hair around his ear. Eren is still and melts into the cushions.  
  
    There’s a knock on the front door about the time Eren estimated the pizza to arrive. Jean gets up to answer the door. Eren sits up and checks the money in his pocket. He quickly counts out the bills and jumps up after Jean. The blonde already has the door open and the delivery guy is handing him the box.  
  
    “I got it. I got it.”  
  
    Eren reaches around Jean and passes the handful of bills to the pizza guy.  
  
    “The rest is for you.”  
  
    The guy thanks him and walks away.  
  
    Jean stares at Eren as he takes the pizza and walks back towards the living room.  
  
    “I could have gotten that,” he says as he shuts the door.  
  
    Eren calls back, “I know.”  
  
    And they leave it at that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll get back on the regularly scheduled chapters after I finish my other project. This chapter was just my mind getting away from me and I felt bad for not posting as often as I use to.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed it, thanks for reading :)


	22. Early to Mid June, Year One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angst is building...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last year when I took a poll about what the readers wanted next, conflict came as a close second to role reversal. Seriously what is up with everyone wanting to see these boys hurting (just kidding, I totally get it).
> 
> This fight felt bigger when I first wrote the rough way back in early 2015. This was actually one of the first things I wrote for this au. I wanted to wait to post it until I felt comfortable enough in my writing to get it right and to build up Jean and Eren's relationship. So many ideas were added to the original thought and so many were taken away. I hope it feels natural and not so abrupt.
> 
> Here, have some angst with good helping of fluff, with lots of dialogue and inner thoughts. 
> 
> Important authors note at the end.

* * *

_Jab, jab, hook._

_Jab, cross, elbow._

_Backhand, uppercut._

Eren’s fight is six weeks out. The training is almost non-stop and all the motions are muscle memory at this point. He’s getting focused, putting the blinders up and honing in on his fight. The snickers and whispers behind is back isn’t helping.

The bells on the front door jingle.

Eren continues through the combinations. Hitting faster and harder, sweat dripping. His teeth are clenching because— _Really!? They have nothing else better to do?_

His temper is reaching its breaking point and Eren turns away from Hannes holding the sparring pads, and addresses the two men standing outside the cage.

“You want to get in here and say that to my face!?” he snarls, something close to rage behind his eyes.

The two men standing outside the cage are two fighters from another gym that Hannes brought in. They are suppose to be here training. One of them (Eren assumes the one who was talking shit) flaps a hand Eren, shooing him away as they walk away back to their own routines.

“Fuck you too, asshole.”

Hannes comes up behind Eren, one hand gripping his upper arm. 

“Eren, you need to calm down. You know the consequences of getting into it with one of them.” Eren huffs. “Come on, go get some water, get your head straight.” 

He does as he’s told. Eren rips off his gloves aggressively and stalks out of the cage. He glares at the backs of the other fighters as he heads to the bench, dropping his gloves and picking up his water. As he’s tipping his water back he glances towards the front desk and sees Jean leaning against the counter talking to Mikasa. 

_Jean shouldn’t be here. Why isn’t he at work?_

Eren heads towards the front.

“What are you doing here?” 

He’s still kind of angry so his tone does not sound welcoming. Jean doesn’t seem to take it personally. 

“Early dismissal. Thought I would stop by,” he smiles.

 “You never just _stop by_.”

Mikasa scolds him, “Eren.”

“Sorry,” he sighs, trying to shake loose the tension.

“It’s fine.” Jean says to Mikasa. “That’s true.”

Jean licks his lips to keep from over smiling, Eren notices. 

“I was kind of hoping I could steal you to go out to dinner.”

Eren looks at him skeptically, “Why?”

Jean allows his smile to widen proudly. “ _Because_ …I got promoted and I’d like to fucking celebrate.”

Eren’s eyes widen. Mikasa congratulates him quietly.

“Holy shit,” Eren breathes.

“Yeah.” Jean laughs. “So what do you say? Can I steal you?”

Jean looks from Eren to Mikasa, and Eren does the same. Mikasa huffs like it’s a huge inconvenience (it’s not really).

“I’ll get Hannes or Levi to cover for you.”

“You’re the best. Thank you.”

Eren tries to grab her face to kiss her cheek but she puts a hand to his face and pushes Eren away.

“What time?”

Jean briefly glances at his lit up phone. “I, uh, got 7:00 reservations so we’ve got time for you to finish up here. I brought a change of clothes for you, they’re in the car.”

Eren smiles. “I have a grappling session next and then I’ll have to shower so we can be out of here in like—“ he squints at the clock on the wall—“An hour?” 

“That works.”

Eren knocks on the countertop and steps away back towards the cage. Jean watches him go but his eyes slip to two guys standing off to the side whose eyes are also following Eren. 

“Hey Mikasa?” Jean leans slightly over the counter, keeping his voice low.

Mikasa looks up the computer to acknowledge him and he nods in the direction of the two guys.

“Who are they?” 

She looks over her shoulder briefly. “Oh, um, Hannes brought them in from another gym to help with Eren. It’s not really going well.” Jean tilts his head in question. “Hannes thought it would be good to have other fighters here training alongside Eren, build up the hype, you know? His plan is kind of back firing, I feel bad. 

They aren’t even in the same weight class but they’ve spent most of the time antagonizing Eren, which, you know how he can be. Hannes is giving them till the end of the week to get their acts together before he sends them back to their other gym.”

“Hopefully things will pan out.” It sounds like a question.

Mikasa sighs. “Eren just has to keep a cool head while they’re here. If he snaps he could be disqualified from the fight for attacking another fighter. Some animosity is fine leading up to a fight but that’s usually between opponents. If there’s a brawl before the match, they’re out.”

Jean peaks over Mikasa’s shoulder to eye the two guys again. “I’m sure _you_ could scare them into behaving.”

Her lips quirk on one side. “If it comes to that, I will.”

Jean grins back before slipping away from the front desk, allowing Mikasa to get back to her paperwork. 

Eren is already back in the cage with a sparring partner and a coach. Hannes is watching from outside and Jean goes to stand next to him. They talk briefly about Eren’s chances in his upcoming match. Apparently his chances are good, so long as he behaves for the next six weeks.

Hannes pats Jean’s shoulder, “Keep him in line for me will ya.”

Jean snorts an _I’ll try_ as Hannes walks away.

 

—

 

The fight is four weeks out now, crunch time.

Eren is up at the crack of dawn with Jean, eats breakfast with him, and then he leaves to head to the gym to work out. His classes have taken a backseat while he focuses on his training. The one class he couldn’t let go of, of course, was the kid’s Saturday morning class, he can’t let them down. Mikasa offered to cover for him but he refused. 

As soon as Eren gets to the gym the clock is ticking and he has to get everything in. It feels like he’s working non-stop getting ready for this fight. He wants to get all his combinations locked down, work on all his weaknesses. Everyone at the gym has been great. Hannes helps him with pretty much everything. Levi still spars with him and helps him work on his agility. Mikasa makes sure he stays on task, watches his diet and weight, and records his progress. There’s nothing to worry about, therefore Eren doesn’t worry. 

Or at least, he appears to not worry.

For the past two weeks it feels like every little thing crawls under Eren’s skin. People offer advice and critique and they are things Eren already knows. Mikasa and Levi hound him over his diet ( _god_ he misses Chinese take-out and pizza). And those new guys drive him _insane_. 

Eren gets it. It’s a competition, a little bit of antagonism is healthy. But Eren doesn’t understand what their problem is. It’s not like their gyms are rivals. They aren’t in the same weight class, therefore they have never fought each other and probably never will. They are close in age and experience. They’ve seen Eren with Jean in the gym a couple of times and they showed no negative reaction to that. These guys seem to be antagonistic for the sake of being antagonistic.

After a discussion with Hannes a week and a half ago, the fighters stepped back a little bit. They still manage to bump Eren’s shoulders in passing, whisper scathing remarks while they are training alone. The two of them just keep adding fuel to the fire burning under Eren’s skin. He leaves the gym every day still wound tight like a coiled spring. No amount of punching a heavy bag helps him when the other guys are nearby. 

Going to Jean’s at the end of the day should be a relief, but for the past two weeks it hasn’t been. A lot of small things have been adding up and Eren feels like he’s going to explode.

 

-

 

Jean is sitting on the couch, tablet in hand and TV on, when Eren lets himself in. He drops his bag in the hallway, as usual, and then sinks into the couch, heaving a heavy sigh. It’s been like this for at least the past week, silent greetings. Eren isn’t sure if this is just a new stage in the relationship or if it’s him. 

Without looking up from the tablet, Jean tells Eren his dinner is on the counter and just needs to be microwaved. Eren sighs again because _right…dinner_.

Wordlessly he gets up and heads for the kitchen. He shifts from foot to foot watching his plate spin in the microwave. The TV behind the wall is loud and Eren can hear the crime drama play out. He’s seen this episode before (he’s pretty sure Jean has, too).

Eren shuffles back to the couch with piping plate in hand. While he eats they don’t talk. Jean’s still looking at his tablet, fingers swiping constantly at the screen, and Eren stares blankly at the TV. The fork is the only thing making noise between them, scraping against the plate to gather the rice and a piece of chicken, only silencing when he brings the food up to his mouth. It’s routine and monotonous. He stretches forward to place his empty plate on the coffee table. 

Only a moment goes by and Jean perks up a bit beside him.

“Oh! Look at this one, it has a fireplace on the outside patio.”

With a groan, Eren sinks down further and leans his head back against the cushions.

“Jean,” he says tiredly, “not tonight.”

“C’mon, this was fun the other night.” Jean shifts closer and lightly smacks Eren’s arm. “It’ll loosen you up, just look.” 

Eren feels unwarranted irritation and he tries to hold back. Just to give himself a little space he reaches for his plate again and stands up, silver wear scratching against the ceramic harshly. 

“I’m not in the mood.” His voice is low, angry and melancholic.

Jean’s eyes follow him as he leaves the couch. “What’s up with you?”

“Nothing.” Eren sounds so far away even though there’s probably only ten feet between them. 

It’s a weak excuse and they both know it.

“It’s obviously something if you’re being snappy.” 

“I don’t want to talk about it.” 

Jean sighs, “Don’t do that.”

“I’m not _doing_ anything.” His voice raises in volume only slightly, that doesn’t deter Jean though.

He can tell Jean is getting upset, his tone dips into anger like Eren’s. “You know _exactly_ what you’re doing.” 

_I’m avoiding telling you because you’re part of the problem._

Eren drops his plate in the sink loudly. Jean flinches at the noise but Eren can’t see him due to the physical wall in front of him. He can’t stay here.

Before he can rationally think, his feet are already moving towards the hallway.

“This was a bad idea,” he mumbles, reaching for his shoes.

Jean sees him slipping into his shoes and something like panic strikes through him. He gets to his feet, the forgotten tablet falling to the couch and then the floor. He can’t move from his spot, feet frozen.

Cautiously he asks, “What was?”

Eren won’t meet his eyes. “Coming here.”

“Eren—“

“Just stop!” 

A wave of guilt settles on Eren’s shoulders. A brief glance in Jean’s direction, seeing his hurt expression, and his stomach sinks. Without looking back he bends to grab his bag and keys.

“I’m going home.”

Jean doesn’t say anything and Eren’s anger towards himself flares up again.

The front door shuts loudly behind him.

 

\- 

 

It feels like he’s suffocating, like he held his breath the whole drive back to his apartment. Eren rips the keys from the ignition and throws himself out of his car only to lean against the driver’s door when he’s out.

_What is wrong with me?_

_None of this is Jean’s fault_.

Well…not all of it.

Besides the big fight being only a few weeks away…Besides the other fighters at the gym giving him crap for whatever reason…Besides being hounded constantly by coaches during the day to keep going, get faster, hit harder, eat right…

Jean didn’t do it on purpose. Eren knows that.

Two weeks ago, Jean got promoted (a well deserved promotion in Eren’s eyes). And it just so happens that his lease on his apartment is up in about two months. What better time to start looking at a new place.

Two nights after the promotion, Jean and Eren were curled up on the couch looking at new housing prospects for Jean. It was fun and good for some laughs. But by night three, Eren began to notice a pattern.

It started with looking at nicer places nearby, maybe two or three miles away from where Jean is now. Then it got further away. Twenty minutes away. Thirty minutes. Fifty. Over an hour. 

Jean’s search lead him to the other side of the city. The _nicer_ side of the city, away from “this shithole”, as Jean put it.

Eren doesn’t know why this shocked him. Even when they were younger Jean always talked a big game of getting a good job and living somewhere glamourous. He thought he grew out of it since he doesn’t bring it up anymore. 

But moving somewhere an hour away…it’s not like it’s long distance but, _god_ , it feels that way considering it takes Eren twelve to fifteen minutes to get to Jean depending on if he’s coming from work or his apartment (and if he hits any red lights on the way). 

It didn’t seem to phase Jean that he would be farther away from Eren. It’s like that idea wasn’t even considered! And _that_ hurt. Eren is not a clingy person. He and Jean aren’t _clingy_. 

The thought of Jean moving away, that far away, _sucked_. 

Slowly, Eren put distance between him and Jean on the couch as he looked at new places to live. He played along when Jean got excited about a particular place, a particular feature. Jean didn’t seem to notice Eren’s disinterest. He didn’t notice any change in Eren _at all_. And for someone so observant, to not notice Eren’s change in mood, someone who wears his emotions on his sleeve, that upset Eren.

He let everything get bottled up and it finally boiled over.

Eren breathes in the humid night air but it doesn’t calm him down any more.

 

-

 

Thirty-six hours later, it hits like a freight train.

Actually, it feels a lot like Levi’s knee digging into his gut and air being forced out of his lungs. This single moment of weakness makes it easy for Levi to pin Eren to the mat, for the _fifth_ time.

“What’s wrong with you? You’re not even trying to fight back,” Levi snarls as he stands over Eren.

He shoots up into a sitting position, “Yes I am!”

Levi scoffs, voice lowering to his normal monotone volume. “Clearly you’re not if you’ve been down this many times. What’s up with you?”

“I’m fi—“ Eren huffs, “I’m fine.” He looks down and starts to pick at the fraying seam of his grappling gloves.

Eren can _feel_ Levi’s stare and knows those stony eyes aren’t buying any of his bullshit. He probably knew something was up the moment Eren begged him to stay tonight to spar with him. Eren threw his puppy eyes at him and Levi caved.

_“Fine! But only for an hour and then I’m gone.” Levi drops his bag by the desk. “You’re a real fucking brat, you know that?”_

_“So I’ve been told…by you…every day.”_

_Levi smirks at him, “Alright c’mon. The quicker we start the faster I can get out of here.”_

Some might find it hard to believe that Levi is an actual caring person. But Eren knows he cares a lot, specifically and especially for people he considers like family. He’s known Eren since he was a kid, and with him being so close to Mikasa, they are practically family.

Eren gives under his stare. “I’m mad at Jean. Or, I _was_ until I realized I was being stupid.”

Levi snorts, but Eren keeps going, the dam broke.

“He didn’t even notice I was mad at him. He usually notices _everything_ but—he’s so caught up in his promotion, which I’m happy for him, like I’m really proud of him and he deserves it—now he’s talking about moving away. He’s looking at places on the other side of the city an hour away. He keeps talking about how he can’t wait to get away from this shit hole and I just—I don’t understand why he wants to leave when all his friends are here, his family is here, _I’m_ here.”

Eren pauses to take a breath. 

“I don’t want him to move that far away, but I can’t tell him that. I have no right to say where he can and can’t live. I’m mad at myself for even thinking all this when I should just be happy for him.”

Levi squats down in front of Eren. “You’re right.”

Eren looks up from his hands.  

“You don’t get a say with what he should and shouldn’t do. The only thing you _can_ do is be in his corner. Support him in any decision he makes. So what if he moves an hour away? It’s not like you won’t ever see him again. You’ll see each other on the weekends or you just suck it up and have a longer drive to work.”  

Levi rolls his eyes when Eren squints at him confused.

“Don’t give me that look. You haven’t been living with Mikasa and Armin for over a month, might be close to two by now.”

A blush washes over Eren’s cheeks, _What?_

With a sigh, Levi stands and unwraps his hands. He stuffs the wraps into his bag when he tells Eren to think about it. Then he’s gone and Eren is still sitting on the floor.

 

-

 

Jean hasn’t talked to Eren since he left the other night. He feels like an idiot because for once he can’t figure out what went wrong. For the time being he thought giving Eren some space would be the best thing, give him time to calm down and give himself time to figure it out.

There’s been no calls. No texts. No word from Mikasa or Armin.

Their fight— _can it really be called that though?_ —is bothering him. It’s not like they don’t argue because they do, a lot. The arguments are over nothing things though, super domestic things like dinner, what movie to watch, who gets to be the big spoon. 

Maybe they are surpassing the “honeymoon phase”. Maybe their arguments won’t be that simple anymore.

That thought depresses Jean and he sighs sinking back into his armchair.

“I want to fix this.”

His phone buzzes in his pocket and he scrambles to get it out, hoping, but it’s just Mikasa.

“Hey Mik.”

“Have you seen Eren?” 

 Jean straightens in his chair. “Um, no. I haven’t talked to him since Tuesday night. Why?”

“You haven’t talked to him today, _at all_?” She sounds surprised and confused.

“No? We don’t have to be in contact at all hours of the day.” 

Mikasa sighs. “He’s not answering his phone. Training ended four hours ago and he’s not home like he said he would be. By the sounds of it he’s not with you.”

“I assumed he was spending the night with you guys again. I wasn’t expecting him here."  

“Did you guys fight or something?”

“No,” Jean is quick to answer, “I don’t know. Hasn’t he been training with Levi some nights? He might just be with him still." 

He changes the subject so Mikasa will move past the thought of them fighting.

“Thursdays Levi usually goes straight home. Plus I’ve already called the gym and got no answer.”

Jean stands, grabs his keys and slips into his shoes. “I might have a hunch. I’ll let you know if I get a hold of him.”

When it’s Eren’s night to close the gym, sometimes he stays much later after he’s locked the door and abuses the gym’s old sound system. Jean doesn’t think Mikasa and Armin know this because lately Eren has just been going to Jean’s place instead of his own, so how would they know if Eren comes in late.

 

-

 

He lost track of time, got sucked into a deep focus. All he could hear was the bass of the music and his quick exhales as his fist connects with the bag. 

His shoulders and thighs burn. Sweat drips from every pore. But he ignores it all.

After Levi left, Eren sat on the floor for several minutes, silence ringing in his ears. The stress and the guilt finally wasn’t a crushing weight on his shoulders, but he still wasn’t ready to talk to Jean yet. He just needs to figure out what he needs to say. Working on the heavy bag usually helps him think, or over think, or not think at all.

Apparently his brain doesn’t want to think at all. It’s done enough of that.

Eren doesn’t notice that his music has stopped.

“Imagining me?”

Eren startles and whips around at the sound of another voice. Jean’s standing by the benches several feet away. _How’d he get in? Shit, Levi probably didn’t lock the door when he left._

“No,” he answers, it sounds curt but he’s just out of breath.

Jean leans against one of the support columns. “But you’re upset with me.”

It’s not a question.

On the car ride over to the gym Jean ran the past two weeks over in his head and realized Eren was pulling away, he just didn’t know why.

Eren hasn’t answered him, he just picks at his hand wraps.

Jean sighs, “Can we skip the guessing games and just tell me why?”

He’s met with more silence.

“Eren—“

“I _was_ mad at you,” Eren interrupts.

“Was? So you’re not anymore?” There’s challenging doubt in his tone.

Eren shrugs. “It’s stupid.”

Jean steps forward, “Try me.”

Eren groans quietly and lets his hands swing down to his sides. He focuses on the corner of the room when he starts talking.

“There was a combination of things. The fight coming up. The assholes here at the gym. And—things were building up and I got mad at you and you didn’t even seem to realize that I was and you notice _everything_."  

Eren realizes he skipped over their whole problem.

“Ok. But why were you mad at me?” Jean’s tone is gentle as he watches Eren deflate.

“You kept talking about leaving. How you wanted to get out of this _shit hole_ and go to the other side of the city where it’s nicer and that bothered me. You grew up here, your family and friends are here! _I’m_ —“ he sighs—“I’m here.”

He won’t look at Jean so he misses his stunned silence.

“Our relationship is still kind of new and we have things we’re still working on and you’re talking about moving an hour away. Not that an hour is long distance but I’m already stressing out about what that does to people. It hurt to look at new places with you but you were so excited showing them to me. I didn’t feel like I was being considered in your decision though. It’s stupid, I know. It’s your life, you’re decision. I want to be selfish and tell you not to move because you’d be farther away, but—“ Eren picks at his wraps again—“I _was_ mad at you, and at myself, and when you didn’t notice it just felt worse. So there it is. That’s it.”

A blush has built up on Eren’s cheeks, embarrassed from just blurting everything out. He already knows how stupid that all sounded. And now Jean—

Jean’s trying not to laugh. He has turned his body away slightly but Eren knows and glares at him.

“ _Jesus Christ_ ,” Jean breathes. “You should have said something _way_ sooner.”

That doesn’t make Eren feel better. 

“When I said I wanted to get out of this shit hole, I meant my apartment, not the whole fucking town.”

_Oh_.

Jean keeps going. “All those places I’ve been looking at I still can’t afford even with my promotion, they’re still dreams. And just because it’s my decision, you’re right about that, that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t put you into consideration. Besides being affordable, proximity to you would be nice.”

God this isn’t making Eren feel _any_ better. He drops his eyes to the floor.

“I’m sorry I didn’t notice you were upset. I admit I got caught up with the promotion and the house hunt. Still doesn’t excuse not paying attention to you.”

Eren only nods. Jean shuffles closer, stopping an arms length away this time, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

“You forgive me?”

He nods again and finally meets the other’s eyes, “Yeah.”

Jean smiles and Eren scoffs lightly before returning it. The blonde tugs on his arm to pull him closer.

 

\- 

 

As an apology, Jean promised to take Eren out to lunch on Saturday. What he promised was greasy tacos despite the fact that they are against Eren’s strict upcoming fight diet. So Eren was extra excited to leave the gym when Jean showed up.

When Jean misses the turn to the restaurant however, Eren is concerned.

“Uhh, you missed the turn.”

Jean keeps looking straight ahead, “I know.”

“You know? Then where are we going?”

“Thought I’d bring you some place new instead.”

Eren crosses his arms and looks out the window, grumbling under his breath, “Better be good.”

He misses Jean smiling to himself.

They start venturing into a more residential area and Eren begins to silently question Jean’s intentions.

“Where are we going?”

“Hm?” Jean briefly glances at him. “We’re almost there.”

That doesn’t answer Eren’s question.

He keeps his eyes facing forward out the windshield and things begin to register when Jean pulls into a housing complex. Jean takes a left, a right, then another left into a small parking area. He parks in front of an end unit townhouse.

“Who’s place is this?” Eren asks.

Jean has already unbuckled and is reaching for the door.

“Mine, maybe.”

Eren follows Jean out of the car and up to the front door where Jean knocks. A small plump woman answers and ushers them inside. She gives them a brief overview of the layout and features then excuses herself to make a phone call when they go to explore.

There’s a decent sized kitchen, dining area, living room, half bath and a small den on the first floor. There’s a door in the living room that leads out to a small porch in the back. Upstairs, there’s a full bathroom, a guest room and the master suite with an attached bathroom and walk-in closet. Eren whistles when they walk into the master bedroom, it’s several square feet bigger than the room Jean has now. They make their way back downstairs and wait in the kitchen for the woman to come back. 

Jean leans against the corner of the counter. “What do you think?”

Eren spins in place, taking everything in, the first floor has an open layout so he can see everything.

 “It’s really nice. You might not get me to leave when I visit,” he smirks over his shoulder.

Jean gnaws on his lip. “If you lived here you wouldn’t have to worry about leaving.”

Eren whirls around to face Jean, who’s blushing furiously, cheeks and ears red.

_Did he just…_

“Did—A-are you asking me to move in with you?”

Eren thinks Jean is trying to smile but it looks more like a grimace.

“Yeah.” 

Jean watches Eren’s eyes widen and he can tell he’s just a few moments away from possibly freaking out.

“You don’t have to answer right now. I just figured I’d ask while you were here to see it.” He clears his throat. “You practically live at my place now anyway, with the exception of three days this week. And maybe it’s too soon but, I don’t know, it just feels right standing here with you.”

Eren glances around the room, trying to imagine _living_ here _with_ Jean.

“Honestly, I’ll probably still get this place even if you don’t move in. Maybe that will come later.”

“When do you need an answer?”

“As soon as possible really. This is just a model, the actual unit still has tenants in it and they move out next month. It would be easier to both sign the lease than adding you in later. I don’t want to pressure you though, if you don’t want to that’s fine.”

Eren opens his mouth to answer when the front door opens and the woman walks back in.

“So, what do you think of the place?” she asks.

“It’s great,” Jean answers.

“Are you interested in a lease or do you think you need to keep looking.”

“I’d definitely be interested in a lease.”

She claps her hands and reaches into her bag, “Wonderful! Will it just be one of you moving in or both?”

Her smile is wide and genuine and Jean falters.

“Uhh—“

“Both of us,” Eren interjects.

“Fantastic!” The woman scribbles some notes on a piece of paper and hands it to Eren who is closer to her. “Take this to the front office, it’s right as you came into the complex. They’ll help you get started.”

The two of them follow her outside and they head towards the car while she locks up and walks away.

Jean starts the car but makes no move to shift it out of park.

“You sure about this?”

Eren smiles and reaches for Jean’s hand on the gear shift. “Yeah.”

“Absolutely sure?” His cheeks are beginning to hurt from smiling.

“Yes,” Eren laughs, “Absolutely sure.”

Jean reaches for him and kisses him across the center console.

_I don’t care if it’s too soon or too fast. I want this._

Eren pulls away, “Come one, let’s go make it official and sign the fucking piece of paper.”

Jean sneaks in one more kiss, “Alright alright.”

He watches Eren buckle his seatbelt and then pulls out of the parking space, back onto the main road inside the complex.

Eren slaps Jean’s arm with the back of his hand, “You still owe me tacos.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't apologize enough about my lack of updates this year. Honestly, this story kind of took a back seat to other au stories (I shit you not when I say I have a document on my computer with over 400 pages and close to 270,000 words of other JeanEren aus). I also went through a funk of not being able to write for about two-three months because of some inner conflict, but I came out of it eventually. 
> 
> I absolutely do plan on finishing this properly. I refuse to just leave it abandoned and unfinished. With that being said, there is only going to be one more full chapter and then the epilogue. I feel I've covered everything I wanted to and I hope it wraps up as nicely as I imagine it.
> 
> I know I just came back, but I'm going to take a little break for the holidays. I'm going to try and write the last chapter and epilogue at the same time so there won't be much of a wait between the two (it's possible I'll post both at the same time). I don't know when those will be posted though, I have a lot of projects outside of writing that I've been neglecting.
> 
> Thank you to those who have stuck around since the beginning. Thank you to the new readers who may have just discovered this. It blows my mind that this has gotten over 10,000 hits. I remember reaching 1,000 and I was so overwhelmed and I thought maybe I could make it to like 5,000, wouldn't that be cool. You guys are the best. HUGS FOR EVERYONE!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading!!
> 
> As of right now I don't have an updating schedule. I'll update as often as I can. Sometimes the process is slow, other times my fingers can't seem to catch up with my brain. So bear with me. 
> 
> Thank you all who have subscribed, left kudos and comments. You guys keep me going. You're all awesome!!


End file.
